Syed had been stood outside the Police station for almost 3 hours. He watched as people walked in, some voluntarily, some cuffed to officers. Some stared at him while others pretended the he wasn't there. But he didn't pay attention to them. His eyes were empty as he looked at them. All he could think of was Christian. He was in there, all alone, re-living every detail of that night, that man to a total stranger. He should have gone in with him, he should be there with him, sitting next to him, holding his hand as he waited. All alone he'd re-live it over and over. If Syed had gone in with him, he could have eased it, taken his mind of it a little.

As he leaned backwards against the sign Syed checked his watch for what felt like the hundredth time. 3 hours. 3 hours he'd been in there alone. Thinking Syed had gone, thinking he didn't care. 3 hours of being scared, petrified of going over it again in his head. Syed knew he'd never admit to it but no matter what Christian would say, Syed knew he was scared.

He heard the door open and casually lance to the right, the same way he had done every time he'd heard it open. But this time he saw him. A tall man in a checked shirt and jeans walked out of the doors and down the steps, a sigh of relief escaped him. Syed pushed himself away from the post and started to wards towards him.

Syed: Well?

Christian spun around, shocked to see him standing in front of him. Syed tried to hide the horror on his face. He was used to seeing the bruises on Christian's face but they still shocked him, still disgusted him, knowing what he went through to get them. Knowing why he went with that man in the first place. Knowing it was because of him.

Christian: What're you doing here?

Syed: How did it go?

Christian didn't understand. He'd waited for him? Why?

Christian: You've not been waiting for me all this time?

Syed glanced casually at the floor then back into his eyes. His piercing green eyes. He felt his heart melt. The words escaped his lips before he could stop them, not that he wanted to.

Syed: Are you going to invite me home?

Christian smiled. Home? He suddenly remembered something his mother always said. 'Home is where the heart is'. He hoped beyond anything else in this world that he had Syed's heart. He reached up and brushed his cheek with the palm of his hand.

Christian: C'mon

Syed suppressed his smile. He was so sure Christian would turn him down. After everything he'd gone through, everything he'd put him through, he never thought he'd want him again. Christian could have any man (or woman for that matter) that he wanted. Why would he waste his time ion him? So fickle minded, so hurtful in his ways towards him. Syed knew every time he tried to deny what he felt he always lashed out on him. He'd said some unforgivable things to him, hurtful things, but he always took him back. Syed had no idea why but he didn't question it either. As long as he still had him.

Syed began walking behind him, allowing his smile to widen as his eyes fell on Christian's pert arse.

Syed: You know, those jeans are a bit tight.

Christian laughed.

Christian: Really? I'd better not wear them again them.

Syed: I didn't say they're too tight. Just as you wear them when I'm around!

Syed quickened his pace a little so he fell into step with him. As they walked side by side they're arms brushed against each others with every couple of strides. With every electrifying touch both men couldn't keep their eyes from each others or hide the intensity that was growing in their trousers.

Syed: What did they say then?

Christian: Sy, do we have to? I'm not really in the mood.

Syed: Sorry. It's just, standing out there, things started going through my head. Of what he did.

Christian brushed his cheek.

Christian: Don't, OK. Don't think about it.

Syed: I should have come in with you.

Christian: I told you I didn't want you too.

Syed smiled.

Syed: And since when have I ever listened to you?!

Christian laughed aloud.

Christian: True.

An awkward silence followed. Both minds were filled with the same question but neither attempting to ask it.

What if Syed didn't mean what he thought he did when he invited himself back? What if he was just being a friend, offering moral support.

What if Christian only agreed to him coming back because he just wanted a shoulder to cry on, a friend? Syed was OK with that, but not knowing if he wanted more, it was eating him up inside. He looked up at Christian out of the corner of his eye, his face wore a frown.

Syed: You OK?

Christian: Yeah. No, actually.

He stopped walking.

Christian: What did you mean back there? About inviting you back?

Syed smiled. Their minds were so often filled with the same thoughts it was laughable. Christian's face was strained. He wanted him, Syed could see it plainly. Syed walked towards him.

Syed: What do you think I meant?

His face wore his cheeky smile, his eyes glistened. Casually he ran his finger down Christian's bare arm.

Christian: You go on. I'll catch you up.

He walked into the newsagent they were stood outside.

Syed: Where are you going?!

Christian stopped at the door, turned around and flashed Syed a smile.

Christian: We've run out.

Syed: Oh! Already?!

Christian: Afraid so!

Syed couldn't believe they'd gone through 6 already. He smiled as he started to remember each occasion.

Christian: Actually, you go and get them.

He walked out of the door way and handed Syed the money.

Syed: What?

Christian: You want me, you get them.

Christian smiled and the worried look on Syed's face. He'd never bought them before. He walked up to him, took his hand in his and spoke softly.

Christian: It's easy Sy. You walk in, walk up to the counter, say 'Hello Mr Shopkeeper, can I have a packet of condoms please?' He'll ask you how many, you tell him, give him some money, wait for your change then turn around and leave. It's simple.

Syed smirked.

Syed: Don't I have to put them in my pocket before I leave?

Christian: Very funny. So, are you going to do this? Or are you going home alone?

Syed breathed in deeply, he could do this.

Syed: OK, OK, I'm going.

He walked past him into the shop, up to the counter at the back of the shop and tried not to let his nerves show. He was a grown man for goodness sake!

Woman: Yes love?

The woman smiled, he smiled back.

Syed: Packet of condoms please.

Woman: What size pack?

Her smile was still there. Just as he was going to answer her he heard Christian call out.

Christian: Better get the 12 pack Sy, we don't want to run out like last time.

Syed turned his head. There he was, stood in front of the magazine rack flicking through the pages of a gay magazine. Syed couldn't help but laugh. He was about to turn back to the woman when he thought he'd get his own back.

Syed: Do you want that as well 'babe'?

He emphasised the last word and Christian laughed.

Christian: Nah, don't need it, not when I've got the real thing at home.

Syed turned his head back to the woman, but she was totally oblivious to what had just happened between them.

Syed: 12 please.

He said with a smile. He handed her the money, pocketed the box and change and headed for the door. As he walked past where Christian was stood he playfully tapped his arse.

Syed: Are you coming? Or do I have to start without you?

Christian: You know I love it when you do.

As they left the shop and turned the corner onto the square Christian playfully nudged Syed's arm.

Christian: Sorry.

Syed laughed.

Syed: No you're not! You enjoyed every minute of that didn't you?

Christian: Got your own back tho. 'Babe'?

Syed: First thing that came to my mind.

Christian's leaned his head sideways and spoke in the low whisper that always made Syed's heart miss a beat.

Christian: I liked it.

Syed smiled. He'd liked saying it.

As soon as he saw the door of the flat Syed quickened his pace.

Christian: Eager aren't we?!

Syed looked around to see that he was about 6 steps behind him. He was suddenly embarrassed.

Syed: Sorry.

Christian: Don't be. I like the fact you can't wait to get me in bed.

Syed: We never actually make it to the bed tho do we?

Christian: There's always a first time.

Christian walked past him, biting his lower lip as he smiled. Syed followed behind him, knowing what that look meant. He wanted him and he wanted him now.

Christian opened the door and Syed walked in, up the stairs and waited against the locked inner door. Christian slowly placed the key in the lock, turned it and pushed the door open, his eyes never leaving Syed's, his tongue sticking slightly out of his mouth in the filthy way only he could get away with.

Christian: After you.

Syed rolled his eyes at the look on Christian's face. He walked in to the familiar surroundings. The one place he could be the real him. The one place he'd never be judged.

He heard Christian throw the keys on the table as he spoke.

Christian: It's been a while. I hope you haven't lost any of your moves.

Syed: And what makes you think I have any moves?!

He turned around to see Christian already start to unbutton his shirt. His hand stopped before he reached the bottom.

Christian: Sy? What is it? What's wrong?

Syed's face was a mixture of anger and horror. His eyes, glazed with tears, were fixed on Christian's purple and black chest. Christian realised he was seeing the full extent of the beating for the first time.

Christian: Sy...

Syed: I'm so sorry. This is all my fault. I should go.

He couldn't stand to look at him, knowing he was the cause of it.

Christian: Please, don't. I want you here with me. I'm safe when you're here with me.

Syed: But you're face, you body. It's all because of me.

He walked over to Christian, undid the remaining buttons and slid his shirt off him. He saw how the bruises carried on around his side to this back.

Christian: It's not your fault Sy,

Syed: Of course it is. Just because I didn't physically hit you, but you'd never have gone off with him if I hadn't said those things to you.

Christian held his arms and stared deeply into his eyes.

Christian: Listen to me Syed. None of this is your fault OK, none of it. You know this sort of thing has happened before. It's my own fault, inviting a stranger back to my home. I was asking for it really

Syed: Don't. Don't you dare say that again. Just because you asked him back, doesn't mean you were asking for this.

He placed his hand on Christian's black ribcage causing him to wince slightly from the pain.

Syed: Sorry.

Christian: Don't be. Just, just forget everything OK. Forget what happened. It's just me and you. No one else exists.

He bent down slightly and placed his lips on Syed's.

Christian: Just be gentle with me.

Syed: I will. I promise.