Paper_Angel: The way to a man's heart is through his stomach!
Sasori read the screen, norrowing his eyes at a suggestion he was given in a forum; how to get a man... And that was the suggestion? What a joke! Even Sasori knew it was easier to get into a man's heat through his pants! Well, that was what seemed more logical to him as the dating scene was not his strong suit. Sure it had never worked on him when he got pawed at while drinking with a couple coworkers, but the person he was trying to woo wasn't the most subtle with things like he was. So if they weren't subtle, why would a subtle courting work?
Scorpion: Does it really work?
Paper_Angel: Yes! Trust me when I say it worked for me. You won't be upset with the results. My man doesn't even go out for dinner with the guys anymore because he knows there is a delicious dinner at home waiting for him! :devil:
Sasori taps the computer desk for a bit, mulling it over. It wasn't like it would hurt to at least try this out. The worst that could happen is he learns to cook, invites him over and is turned down. All in all it still left Sasori with the benefit of learning a new skill if it did fail and the knowledge that this person who suggested it was an idiot and so was he for believing it.
That settles it. Opening a new tab on his laptop, it was time to do some intense reading of cooking blogs and various binge YouTube video watching. He was going to learn to be an amazing chef and win his way into his neighbors stomach and ultimately heart.
Now Sasori had always taken self pride in being a quick learner, but this was a bit different. Instead of taking his time and working at perfection, he needed to be quick. Oh how many times he over cooked his protein to a tough chewy wad; his poor vegetables into mush as he took his eye off them a moment too long while he cooked something else. It took time, it took practice, and it took a keen eye to make sure his future one and only True Love didn't start dating someone else first.
Sasori took a bite of his latest dinner and actually could help not but smile at the delicious taste, unable to even open his eyes as the sauce coated his mouth. It was perfect. It was perfect yesterday, the day before that and the day before that. Now that he learned to multitask, to memorize what flavours compliment each other, and that sometimes he would have to make something he didn't like.
"It's not awful..." he mumbled as he took another bite, "but I still don't really like mushrooms."
As chewed some more, he looked around he noticed something; he actually had leftovers tonight. Originally the plan was to become a great chef, accidentally make a little extra, invite the poor college boy over, and win that heart over through a hungry stomach. Key note of that was when he felt most confident in his skills. Looking down at the dish he hummed. He would have to be quick before it started to all cool down. It was executed perfectly and he had been doing so well lately with all his prior dishes... perhaps he was ready to start wooing.
Outside the door of his neighbor, he straightened himself out, adjusting his clean well pressed clothing. He had quickly tidied his house, got dressed and was now ready to knock away- until the door swung open.
"AH! Oh! Hiya Mr. Akasuna."
Sasori stared wide eyed at the blond whom had just screamed in his face. Even he knew that wasn't a good response.
"Deidara I'm sorry, is this a bad time?"
"No it's fine. Was I being too loud again?"
Sasori bit the inner part of his bottom lip as his neighbor brought up the first time they actually met. Deidara had the TV so loud, and there he came stomping over, knocking like no tomorrow to yell at him... until his breath was taken away. Instead of lashing out like he would have to his downstairs neighbor, he politely asked the man to turn the volume down. After that they only had small talks at the communal mail box downstairs.
A gorgeous, intelligent artist living next door? What a stroke of good luck for once for Sasori! Albeit his weird expression of art. Maybe with some persuasion and time the blond would change his mind- for the better of course.
"No no, no. Your volume is fine." Sasori shook his hands and head, "I was just wondering if you had had any dinner yet?"
Deidara burst out laughing and that initially made Sasori's heart panic in a sort of fear, as he was worried he was getting a good dose of being laughed directly in the face.
"That's quite the coincidence! I was just heading to the convi to get something to eat. Why?"
A firework went off in Sasori's chest. Now was the moment! It was the perfect time! It was destiny!
"I just made myself dinner and noticed a cooked too much. Would you like to have some?"
"Like... Food food?" Deidara asked, shaking, "Real life not store bought pack food?"
"Of course! I love to cook. It's a...hobby of mine." Sasori said, voice laced with reassurance that there in his house was a delicious meal that he had cooked himself because yes, he loooved to cook. Which wasn't too far from the truth. In fact it wasn't the worst thing to do now that he was good at it. Before in the beginning he loathed it, so it was a nice change to have one less thing to hate in his life. However he would love it all the more if someone else had cooked those delicious meals for him instead.
There on the plate Sasori had placed in front of Deidara was something that looked like it was out of a fancy cooking magazine. There on a fancy dish like you would get in a actual five star restaurant was a dish of long angel hair pasta, covered in a pinkish cream sauce with mushrooms and chicken and spinach. It was topped with thick Parmesan cheese flakes, a sprig of parsley and a single drizzle of a dark sauce.
Whatever the hell this was going to taste like, it was going to be good just based on it's appearance.
Because of course Sasori also needed to learn how to present his dishes. He was an artist! Deidara was an artist! It just made sense.
Across the table sat Sasori, slowly twirling his pasta so he could watch Deidara's expression as he was glued to his plate. Now was the moment where he would see if this would work, or not. If Deidara spat it out, there was a low chance he was ever coming back.
"Oh my god...mm." Deidara moaned as he chewed his forkful. "What the hell- mmm! This is bombin'!"
Making a little fist pump under the table, Sasori's confidence was soaring. "I'm so glad you like it. I was being a little presumptive thinking you would even like-"
"Like? I love this!" Deidara yelled going in for another big bite. "What the hell..." The taste was sublime. The sauce was creamy, fresh and a little spicy while thin, long noodles gave a great texture. Heck, the chicken was tender, the spinach gave a hint of a bitter zing the mushrooms gave a interesting chew to each bite. "Wait- mmm..." he chewed a couple more times, "What's this sauce? I've never had something like it before, un."
"It's a bit of a concoction. Not quite a rose sauce. It's a basic cheese and cream sauce with some tomato paste which brings out not only its own flavour, but gives it that pinkish colour. However it's been seasoned with ground pepper corns, garlic and a pinch of hot curry. The dark sauce is balsamic vinegar."
"What the hell- who the hell thinks to do that?"
"Just came to my mind." Sasori hummed, "say you wouldn't happen to have any allergies?" He prodded, needing to know what not to feed his future husband.
"Nope!"
"Ah, I see... good good... anything you hate to eat?"
"Nope! I love eating everything! Not picky at all. Heck, you could probably feed me a fly pie, un!" He laughed as dove back into his dish. He stopped suddenly and grunted, "Wait that's not all true, I don't really like rice pilaf. I mean I'll eat it, but I don't love it."
"No allergies, eats anything? Good good..." Sasori took note. However he thoroughly ignored the fly pie note. That wasn't attractive, nor was it cute and he was never making one even if Deidara asked. People weren't perfect. "No rice pilaf though."
Once Deidara stood at the door with a full stomach and a huge smile, Sasori made the next move, "If I ever have left overs again, would you like to come over?"
"Oh yes please!" Deidara practically begged as he hands clasped and he knees buckled.
"Alright then. I'll see you around."
"Thank you Mr. Akasuna!"
"Please, just call me Sasori."
"Aight! Bye Sasori!"
Sasori climbed into bed that night with his tablet in his hands, searching online for a new recipe to make. He had to pick something good if he was going to invite Deidara again over as soon as possible. He still needed to dazzle the young man's tastebuds.
"Now what should I make us tomorrow for breakfast..."
-x-
Sasori was up and cooking early. He already knew what time Deidara had to leave for school since he himself was an early riser and his neighbor was not the quietest. He also knew he would have to give the blond time to actually come over and eat. College boys were not the most studious with keeping time. That would hopefully change in due time though. Sasori hated to be kept waiting.
"Breakfast?"
Deidara stared sleepily at the man at his door. Food time again? What time was it? Wasn't it still dark? The building was so quiet...Did he even want food in the first place?
"Now?"
"Yes."
"Just lemme...grab my shirt... aw who cares, un."
Oh yes he wanted to eat again.
Deidara moaned as he ate the thickest, cakiest, fluffiest pancakes ever. They were sweet, buttery and the perfect golden brown. There were even berries on the side, whipped cream and actual maple syrup, not the fake stuff. What was nice about them was that they didn't just soak up the syrup and disintegrate immediately. It was so gourmet for six in the morning!
"Oh my god..." Deidara moaned as he took a second bite, hand hitting the table. "This is so good!"
"They say you enjoy your meal more if you can see the beauty of it with your eyes. The senses are powerful..." Sasori brought up since Deidara was incapable at the time of opening them. They were still in sleep mode and he had no power to open them. "How about some coffee?" Sasori then offered, sliding a cup of home brewed coffee, freshly ground and hand pressed, done the old fashioned way.
"This coffee... what the hell! Even the coffee is delicious!" Deidara moaned again, opening his eyes again momentarily before taking a few more sips.
Sasori felt proud. Of course he would need to learn how to brew the perfect coffee. He was winning Deidara's heart through his stomach after all. He couldn't fail anywhere, even in the drinks department.
Surprisingly enough, Sasori too had a cup himself, even when being more of a tea guy. For once he too enjoyed the bitter beverage. This was definitely the best way to start the morning, coffee in hand and a shirtless Deidara sitting across the table.
"Do you usually cook three times a day or something?" Deidara asked, now fully awake, sucking back the last of his drink.
Sasori put down his fork and dabbed the corner of his lips with a cloth serviette. "Of course I do. Breakfast, lunch and dinner."
Deidara nodded and popped a berry into his mouth. "Hmm... and when do you...usually have lunch?"
"Twelve-thirty."
"I see..."
Sasori smiled as he watched Deidara's eyes twinkle. He knew already that twelve thirty was the perfect time for lunch since that was when Deidara usually came home if he didn't go out with friends.
"Oh by the way Deidara."
"Yes?"
Getting a container out of the fridge, Sasori showed off a container of a garden salad, topped with berries from breakfast and chicken.
"You're a young man and when I heard you eat from the convenience store, I couldn't help but feel bad." He slid the box across the table where Deidara opened and looked inside immediately. "I had some leftover spicy chicken and some greens in the fridge so I made you a little something. It's something to keep you going. You need your energy to learn."
Deidara's eyes went wide at the delicious looking morning snack for him. Spicy chicken, sweet berries, topped with crushed pecans? What a hit of flavor!
"Oh..." Sasori placed something else on the table while he stood behind Deidara, taking his dirty dishes away. "This here? Just some of my homemade vidalia-poppy seed dressing."
"Oh man..."
"Enjoy..."
At mid morning, Deidara sat at a table and opened his salad and poured the dressing on. He was already salivating at the smell of it all. The smell of a salad.
"Damn..." Deidara mumbled, mouthful of salad. The spicy curry chicken, sweet berries and tang of the dressing melding together in harmonious dance as he chewed. "What a culinary angel!"
"Who?" A classmate and friend sitting beside him asked.
Deidara moaned at another bite, "My neighbor. He's too...ugh he too much... mmmm."
"Whoa there Deidara, calm your jets!"
That afternoon Deidara did no calming of his jets as he used them to his full power while he ran home, hoping to be there for when Sasori would be done lunch. There was a chance that there wouldn't be left overs and Sasori wouldn't invite him over, but there was that chance there would be!
"Oh Deidara, you're home already?"
Deidara panted lowly as he opened his door, attempting to not act like he had just got there,"Yeah... what's up...my man..." he asked between careful breaths.
"Well I made a little too much for lunch today and-"
"I would love some, un!"
"Excellent..."
Today consisted of the most gourmet grilled cheese and tomato soup combo Deidara had ever had. There were three complimentary and flavorful cheeses on thick slices of homemade bread, crusted with sesame seeds giving it a delightful crunch and nutty undertones. It was toasted twice on a panini grill, giving it distinct grill lines. The soup was homemade too, thick hearty and flavorful, again a little spicy. There was extra buttered bread on the side for dipping as well. Each bite was...
"Oh my goddd... mmmm!" Deidara moaned. In fact he found it so delicious he licked the second bowl clean. "Ohhh I'm so full... I need a nap." he mentioned, glad he didn't have work today.
Sasori didn't keep Deidara long for chit chat and let the boy head home for an afternoon nap. He needed his rest after all. Sooner or later his taste buds would get another assault of yet another delicious dinner. Bit by bit he would show Deidara the best way of life was a home cooked meal everyday, one so good you could only get it in the Akasuna Household. Deidara would have no choice but to come back every day, and of course Sasori had no problem with that. Everything would go according to plan as he won Deidara's heart through his stomach.
my birthday fic for deidara yayayyayay. it's a chapter fic wow. bye for now losers!