"Let me go! Don't… that hurts! I said let go of me!"
As she opened the front door of the huge apartment, Peggy Carter knew something was wrong. Angie's dim voice came from the big library room to the right, "Untie me, this instant!"
The brunette drew out the small calibre pistol from her purse and stormed on her tiptoes to the enormous oak door. Her finger tightened around the trigger as she put her other hand on the handle.
"You lousy krauts are in big trouble once Captain America gets here!"
Peggy's blood pressure - that was racing sky high up until this point - stilled in a split second and her body froze completely. Then, she heard Angie spoke with a much deeper voice.
"When I'm through with you, Hitler, you're gonna be seeing stars… and stripes!"
Talking a few very deep breaths, Peggy lowered her gun and peeled her finger off the trigger. Angie was making the most ridiculous noises, imitating someone who's punching other people in the face and… other parts.
"Captain America… I knew you would save me."
When the door swung open Angie snapped and looked with big – puppy – eyes at the frustrated woman in the doorway.
"For Christ's sake, Angie, I thought someone was taking you hostage."
"I'm glad to see that you were ready to save the day, English," Angie said with a small laugh, making a funny face at the gun. "But you can relax. And besides, it's not like anybody would ever consider kidnapping me. The only ransom they could get would be a free diner at the Automat… if I take an extra shift the next day."
"After the day I've had it wouldn't have surprised me, trust me." Peggy put back the pistol to its place in her bag, staggered to the sofa and dropped herself onto the other end with a big sigh.
"Though day?" Angie asked with a sad-but-understanding smile.
"You could say that, I suppose. Come to think of it, punching a few bad guys in the guts would have been the highlight of my day."
"Well, I've got news that might cheer you up! I got a call this afternoon – I picked it up in the dining room. It rang for 3 minutes so I knew it was important…"
Angie has been doing these things ever since they moved in. While Peggy was suffering with reports and all kinds of paperwork, her flatmate figured out how to call one phone from another in the apartment. She would call Peggy from the kitchen to ask what she wanted to eat; from her bedroom (which is right next to Peggy's) to ask her if she wanted to have some snaps and talk; or simply to pass the time call the phones randomly, so when a tired "yes, Angie?" would respond she'd start chatting cheerfully. After a minute or two she would make up an excuse, saying that she has some "really urgent matter to attend to", but Peggy always heard the muffled giggling sounds coming through the wall after they'd hung up. She would let the phone ring for minutes (!) before picking up, pretend that she was extremely busy and ask the other person to keep whatever they wanted to say short.
Frankly, if it was anybody else Peggy would've felt annoyed – irritated, even -, but she knew how big of a deal this was for Angie, so she let her have her fun, played along and truth be told it never failed to make her smile either.
"It was Susan Renshaw, my drama teacher. Arlene French struck gold or something; apparently she married this filthy rich producer guy who will cast her in one of his shows. Anyway, so Thomas Cooley from the radio called Susan this morning and asked her if there was anybody who could audition for Arlene's spot on the Captain America Adventure Program. Since I've already tried to get in once, they agreed to let me do a second round tomorrow!" She took a quick breath and went on, "Susan was really nice and put in a good word for me, so I guess I'll have to introduce her to my father's business partner she's been daydreaming about ever since they were in the same room once briefly. Hell, if I get the part I'll even be her bridesmaid for all I care!"
"Angie, that's wonderful!" Peggy said quickly before she could get even more tangled up in her story. "So you've been running lines all afternoon? That's what I managed to interrupt just now?"
"Yeah, but it wasn't going very well anyway. I mean, I only need to memorize three parts, but one of them – this dialogue... It's pretty hard to get into an emotionally difficult scene when you only talk to yourself, you know…"
"I can imagine." Seeing Angie's dispirited face, Peggy had a sudden idea. "But now that I'm here, I can help you prepare. I mean I'm no actress, but if you give me the script I can read the lines of the other person. That'd make it less challenging to memorize, wouldn't it?"
"I guess… but you really don't have to do this. You look like you've been hit with a hammer – several times. You should just go take a hot bath and sleep it out. I'll manage, don't worry about me."
"It wasn't a hammer, and I'm fine. Now," she reached over and took the papers out of Angie's hand. "Where do we start from?"
The smile that she got in response was already worth the effort.
"Page 3, from the middle."
"Alright. You start?"
"No, you do."
"Right… Khmmhh," Peggy cleared her throat quickly. "Betty, I'm afraid this is the end. I-"
It took her a few moments to realize what she was reading, and when she did the words stuck in Peggy's mouth.
Angie – unaware of the other's expression –, on a much higher note than how she usually spoke said, "Oh Cap. There'll never be a man like you… I love you Captain America."
But Peggy didn't hear her anymore, like she was underwater. She could still see the radar monitor's pulsing green light before her eyes; could still feel the cold, hard feeling of the metal stand of the radio in her hands. And the voice. She could still hear his voice like it was yesterday.
"It's not... This didn't happen like this." She whispered, staring at the paper, but still lost in her memories.
"What do you mean? How did it go then?" She heard Angie's voice coming from further than she actually sat.
"He said… The plane is going too fast, and it's heading to New York. There won't be a safe landing…," her voice cracked for a second, "He said it was his choice."
Peggy couldn't see the paper anymore; she closed her eyes and relived that horrible moment again, like she did so many times when she was dreaming. But now talking somehow made it easier, less inescapable.
"I tried to talk him down, to convince him that there was still time. He wouldn't listen. That stupid, stubborn brain of his wouldn't let him. There were too many lives on stake, he would never have risked it… And the dance he promised…"
Next Saturday at The Stork Club. Eight o'clock on the dot. Don't you dare be late!
"He didn't show up," Peggy could feel the cold, salty tears streaming down her face, but she didn't care. "I know, it was foolish of me to go there, wait for him all night long. But I was hoping… hoping that he might be there. That it was nothing more than a bad dream, and the minute he'd show up it would end. And when he didn't…"
She tilted her head down and cried silently. It was partially the exhaustion after the long day; the sadness she still felt every time Steve's memory surfaced in her mind; and the fact that she was not able to share this with anyone ever since that damned day. Not until Angie came along and they finally had no more secrets separating them.
Suddenly Peggy felt warm arms around her and Angie pulled her into a tight hug. The physical contact and even more, what it meant - the support and the caring - made Peggy's last defence line crumble down. She was shaking while the sobs broke out of her chest, slowly ripping open the wounds that took her so long to heal. Yet it was purging in a way. Like when you rip off a Band-Aid and it hurts like hell, because it's been stuck in the wound for so long. But once you remove it, new skin can grow on its place.
Angie didn't say a word. She stroke Peggy's back and let her friend bury her face in her shoulder. Once she ran out of tears and her chest didn't feel so goddamned heavy anymore, Peggy let go of her and glanced up, feeling embarrassed.
"So I would say the writer got more than just the dialogues wrong. Betty Carver, huh?" Angie murmured and reached out to wipe down the last teardrop that was still clinging on Peggy's cheek.
"Angie, I'm sorry you had to see this…," Peggy started apologizing quickly, trying to avoid looking into those fierce, clear blue eyes, "I just… this nonsense script…"
"No, don't," Angie's strict voice made Peggy look up. "Don't ever apologize. Not to me. I'm here for you honey, whenever you need." The reassuring smile was accompanied with a light hand squeeze that made Peggy let a few more teardrops escape onto her already tear-soaked face.
Finally Peggy smiled back at her. She didn't know what she'd done to deserve Angie's friendship, but she was grateful beyond words.
"And this," Angie continued, taking the script out of Peggy's numb hands. "Goes to the garbage, where it belongs."
With a not too elegant move she tossed the paper into the rubbish bin beside the massive oak desk.
"Angie, what on Earth are you doing? You need that for your audition!" Peggy tried to protest, but Angie just waved her hand.
"I'm not going. This is degrading on so many levels; for me, for the memory of the Captain and for you especially. I will not take part in a parody of what was a heroic act. I might be living hand to mouth but I still have my dignity."
Peggy looked at her with true awe in her eyes. This girl, who fought so hard to be a star, to be recognized, to make it; she would give up an opportunity like this because of what she believed in. Peggy could've counted on one hand the people she met in her life who shared this kind of strong determination. One of them was Steve.
"Now, come on!" Angie stood up and dragged her friend up by the hand as well. "You are going to take that hot bath and by the time you finish I'll make the cook prepare something delicious. Also I need to find some snaps somewhere. Sadly all the bottles I've had are gone and I don't really know where I could find any at this hour. Maybe Archie, the valet will help. He winked me the last time I mentioned snaps in from of him."
"Or maybe he winked because he fancies you," Peggy laughed shortly as they walked towards one of the bathrooms.
"You need to stop this thing about every men I meet fancying me, English," Angie waved with her free hand and smiled. "I think I could tell if someone was interested in me."
"That I doubt…"
They reached the blue bathroom and Angie left her there, saying that she would speak with Archie anyway, it was worth a try. She was about to leave when Peggy called out for her.
"Angie?"
"Yes?" Angie turned back.
"Thank you. For… everything."
Her voice was nothing more than a whisper but Peggy was sure she could hear her.
Angie smiled and nodded, holding her gaze for moment before saying, "Anytime."
Author's note: if you want to know the meaning behind the title, listen to this new song by Kelly Clarkson called "Let your tears fall". I wish I could say that it inspired me to write this, but truth be told I only found it when I was already halfway through the story. It is a brilliant song however, and fits this silly one-shot perfectly. I'll leave you with my favorite part of the lyrics:
"It's not a crime to fall apart sometimes,
it's not a crime to ask why to, ask why, you cry,
I will come, no I won't run, I'm not scared to care
Come to me when you're in need, set it free, let the truth breathe"