A/N This came to my head when I watched 4.15 "Friends and Lovers" with my interior design class (don't ask, my teacher is in love with Gibbs and I'm not complaining). I'm not sure how realistic this is, but I couldn't get it out of my head, especially with the double standard Tony shows by not looking at Ziva at first and then shutting down the cop when he tries to flirt. Plus, he did stop being as flirty and, you know, staring at Ziva every five seconds, and I refuse to believe that it was because he didn't care anymore.
Easy
Ziva knew Tony had someone else. The two cell phones, the disappearing act that was quickly getting old, the silence regarding his personal life . . . and the fact that he kept his eyes to himself all of a sudden. The signs were all there. But, that last one was what threw Ziva. He didn't look at women anymore.
He didn't look at her anymore.
In some ways the change was gradual. They didn't hang out after work anymore; Tony was always busy and secretive. Then the flirting stopped and the attention all together. Did he not care? Was she doing something wrong? Or was he really in love with whoever she was?
Ziva couldn't stand herself for thinking these things. Tony wasn't hers. They'd never had anything definable. What was that weakness her dad always warned her about? Oh, yeah, insecurity. She shouldn't—couldn't—feel the way Tony made her feel.
In other ways, the change was a sharp slap. It hit her as she shook her hips right in front of his desk, in front of his face, and danced like Shakira. He didn't listen to her, much less look up. That's when she knew. And it hurt.
Acting like that was stupid, something pining high schoolers do, not confident, sexy women like Ziva. So why did she do it? Why did she need his attention?
She tried to shrug it off, both her actions and Tony's indifference, but things had changed. And it wasn't an easy adjustment.
~o0o~
Tony tried. He really did. But Ziva made it so hard. He thought he could love Jeanne, he tried to love her, he convinced himself and others that he did. But every day he saw an exotic, deadly beauty that made him forget all about Jeanne.
He had to stop. He had to stop cold turkey. If he was going to get the job done and continue what he thought was blooming with Jeanne, he had to stop this whatever it was that he felt for Ziva.
Tony reviewed everything in his mind, looking for clarity.
He really liked Jeanne. She was intelligent, beautiful, and sexy. He loved her too, right? So he shouldn't feel anything but friendship for his Israeli partner. Ziva was beautiful, sexy, and a different kind of intelligent, too, but she was his partner. And she probably didn't want any more than flirting. The choice should be clear.
With all of these inner resolutions in mind, Tony stared pointedly at his computer screen as Ziva, goofing off by his desk. Why did the sketch have to look like someone famous for shaking their hips? Why couldn't she look like the National Chess Champion, or something? Of course, when Ziva snapped at him for not listening, he had to go along with it, even though he heard every word. He felt a little guilty.
Apparently, that one little episode was about as much ignoring as he could do because he immediately jumped on John Carson the Metro Cop when he flirted with Ziva. Tony hadn't meant to, but he'd had enough.
'Had enough'? What was wrong with him? John was probably a wonderful person. Now Tony felt really guilty, especially after bonding with the guy in the surveillance van a little later.
Why did women make it so hard?
A/N What do you think? Please leave a review!