Title: But (or, Greener Grass. I might decide to change it).
Parts: 1/1
POV: Nathan
Disclaimer: please. do i have to go through this again? Ok, (in singsong voice): I don't own any of the characters, or one tree hill.. don't get mad, don't sue, don't be offended.
Rating: PG A/N:I seem to come back to Nathan and Peyton when i'm stuck between stories. Although i don't think i want them together, they were where it all started. And you never get over you're first love.
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It wasn't like he regretted it. He was happy where he was. Or at least, he was as happy as he could be, given the circumstances.
But sometimes he would glance over at her when he passed her locker. They never talked anymore, and if they did, it was rare. They hadn't had a semblance of a real conversation since the night of his dad's party. And they hadn't had a real conversation since...
With Haley, it was different. They always had real conversations. Haley made him happy. With them, it was always sweet. She was always understanding, always there.
But sometimes, in bed, late at night, when he had snuck over to her house and lay in bed with her, stroking her dark silky hair, he remembered golden curls, half-stiff with hair gel. He remembered passion and quick, frustrated, angry kissing in the dark. Fumbled belts and gasps. Cathartic arguing the next day. Hissy fits. Odd that hissy fits could make him smile.
Haley never had hissy fits. She was so... patient. There were times she'd get upset, but it was always the same. A pair of stiff shoulders, and quiet angry, telling him to leave. And then later, he'd feel guilty, and apologize. And she'd forgive him. And everything would be sweet and soft again.
But sometimes, he missed the hardness, the roughness. He missed imperfection, and the beauty in flaws. Misunderstood artwork he never appreciated enough. Harsh tones kicking him out. Coy smiles. Bruises, because he couldn't keep his hands off of her.
Not that he didn't like touching Haley. Her skin was just as smooth, just as soft. And the cute way she'd get exasperated with him, or squeal, or act girly... she always made him smile.
He rarely smiled with Peyton.
He didn't know what was going on in her life anymore. he heard things, from Haley. He knew that Lucas and Brooke were together, because Peyton had freaked out and Lucas needed constancy and commitment. He had smiled wryly when Haley had told him. He knew the fears of commitment.
There were few fears with Haley. She was constant. She was there.
He really was lucky. She had given so much for him. Her school work, her attitude. Even her friendship with Lucas.
When he smelled her hair, he would remind himself how lucky he was to have her.
But sometimes, he would go online, and watch Peyton sit in her room and draw. He had never watched her when they had dated. Had never cared. Now he noticed things he had missed. The slope of her neck to her back. How long her index finger was. Her habit of rubbing her left hand over her left eye three times when she was really tired or worried about something.
Haley had cute habits too. He loved them. Her... idiosyncrasies (a word she had taught him, of course) made her all the more perfect.
But sometimes, he missed imperfection.
Sometimes, he missed her.
1/1
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what do you think? just a quickie. R/R of course.
Parts: 1/1
POV: Nathan
Disclaimer: please. do i have to go through this again? Ok, (in singsong voice): I don't own any of the characters, or one tree hill.. don't get mad, don't sue, don't be offended.
Rating: PG A/N:I seem to come back to Nathan and Peyton when i'm stuck between stories. Although i don't think i want them together, they were where it all started. And you never get over you're first love.
----------------------------------------------------------
It wasn't like he regretted it. He was happy where he was. Or at least, he was as happy as he could be, given the circumstances.
But sometimes he would glance over at her when he passed her locker. They never talked anymore, and if they did, it was rare. They hadn't had a semblance of a real conversation since the night of his dad's party. And they hadn't had a real conversation since...
With Haley, it was different. They always had real conversations. Haley made him happy. With them, it was always sweet. She was always understanding, always there.
But sometimes, in bed, late at night, when he had snuck over to her house and lay in bed with her, stroking her dark silky hair, he remembered golden curls, half-stiff with hair gel. He remembered passion and quick, frustrated, angry kissing in the dark. Fumbled belts and gasps. Cathartic arguing the next day. Hissy fits. Odd that hissy fits could make him smile.
Haley never had hissy fits. She was so... patient. There were times she'd get upset, but it was always the same. A pair of stiff shoulders, and quiet angry, telling him to leave. And then later, he'd feel guilty, and apologize. And she'd forgive him. And everything would be sweet and soft again.
But sometimes, he missed the hardness, the roughness. He missed imperfection, and the beauty in flaws. Misunderstood artwork he never appreciated enough. Harsh tones kicking him out. Coy smiles. Bruises, because he couldn't keep his hands off of her.
Not that he didn't like touching Haley. Her skin was just as smooth, just as soft. And the cute way she'd get exasperated with him, or squeal, or act girly... she always made him smile.
He rarely smiled with Peyton.
He didn't know what was going on in her life anymore. he heard things, from Haley. He knew that Lucas and Brooke were together, because Peyton had freaked out and Lucas needed constancy and commitment. He had smiled wryly when Haley had told him. He knew the fears of commitment.
There were few fears with Haley. She was constant. She was there.
He really was lucky. She had given so much for him. Her school work, her attitude. Even her friendship with Lucas.
When he smelled her hair, he would remind himself how lucky he was to have her.
But sometimes, he would go online, and watch Peyton sit in her room and draw. He had never watched her when they had dated. Had never cared. Now he noticed things he had missed. The slope of her neck to her back. How long her index finger was. Her habit of rubbing her left hand over her left eye three times when she was really tired or worried about something.
Haley had cute habits too. He loved them. Her... idiosyncrasies (a word she had taught him, of course) made her all the more perfect.
But sometimes, he missed imperfection.
Sometimes, he missed her.
1/1
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what do you think? just a quickie. R/R of course.