Always and Forever
I used to ask myself...
Is he the best I can get?'
I was always waiting to see if this was really love, or if it was just longing.
I kept telling myself...
You deserve the perfect guy!
But I wasn't aware that he was right in front of me.
I was deceiving myself...
If you really loved him, you'd tell him.'
The thing is, though, that I couldn't.
I was afraid for myself...
What if he rejects you? Then where will you be?'
I was afraid that my heart would shatter into a thousand pieces.
I didn't know myself...
You are so different from him! He's sweet, you're selfish.'
Maybe I am selfish. But if that were true, I wouldn't hesitate, now would I?
I was torturing myself...
And do you know what I got for three years of inner torture?
Three. Years.
You know what came of it?
Nothing.
Why, you ask? Why didn't anything happen?
I was too afraid to speak.
Too afraid of pain...
Too afraid of rejection...
It didn't work, you know, me waiting...
Waiting to see if you liked me, too.
I'm sorry, but I hate myself.
A while ago, I was told that you did like me back.
That you loved me as much as I loved you.
But you were afraid that I'd reject you.
I wouldn't have.
But maybe...
...maybe fear just comes with adolescence.
Like I said, though...
It's too late.
If I had told you about how I felt, maybe you wouldn't have been out that night.
Driving to a friends house.
Maybe this wouldn't have happened.
I was scared, though...
...and it did.
I'm sorry.
~*~
I love you, Koushiro. I whispered to the grave marker, my hair pulled back into a pony-tail. A tear ran down my cheek as I continued.
Always and forever.
A/N: Hehehe.... you have to guess! BWHAHAHAAaaaa..... yeah, anyways, I actually saw this as either Koumi or Kouyako, but you can see this whatever way you want. Please, tell me how you saw this! ^^;
Arigatou for reading, and please review! Ja ne! Kyra-chan