Steel is my body

∎∎∎∎∎ awoke. The pain in ∎∎∎∎∎ head increased as images of weapons flashed in ∎∎∎∎∎ mind.

Bakuya, Caliburn, Gae Bolg, Dainslaif, Ezekiel, Galantine

Blueprints repeated themselves within ∎∎∎∎∎ and ∎∎∎∎∎ magic circuits went wild, ready to trace. ∎∎∎∎∎ was a cleaner, a moderator, a guardian and there was an unnatural nearby and unnatural had to be destroyed. Slowly ∎∎∎∎∎ rose, eyes focused on one object in the room.

Unnatural
Destroy
Shouldn't Exist

"Ausbruch!"

Shirou blinked to find himself against the wall. His eyes then focused on Rin who looked as if she had unleashed a higher tier spell. He blinked twice before realising that was exactly what had happened. His usual neat and empty room was now filled with scorch marks from the darkened debris. The wooden floors were stained with ash and his bed was still in flames; she had casted second degree explosion magic.

"I turned again didn't I?"

He didn't need her to answer. Just one look at her worried expression and the way she was slumped on the floor taking deep breaths was enough to convince him. Across the room on the wooden drawer was a dagger made in the Mesopotamian era. Even now in his normal state he could still hear the sound of screeching static telling him that this item should not exist.

"Yeah, you big idiot. You turned big time!"

Rin was shouting and he didn't blame her. If he had continued on he might have destroyed the surrounding buildings in the removal of the unnatural. He glanced at the dagger before sighing in defeat. From his analysis, the sharpness was nothing special but the material was unidentifiable.
"You idiot, dummy, numbskull. I hate you!"
She was still ranting he noted with a smile. He crossed the room in three steps and embraced the raven haired girl.

"I'm sorry. And thank you."

He could feel her shudder against him and there was a sigh of content. This was not the first time that he was overwhelmed by the urge to destroy. She had managed to bring him back every time.

But to attack him, this was a first.

After defeating Archer he had the strange ability to sense whether things should be, whether they should exist. The instinct was overwhelming when confronting the King of Heroes, the voices telling him repeatedly that he should not exist with flesh and blood granted by greater sorceries.

Rin whimpered and Shirou sensed that she was holding back tears. If she had not managed to bring him back this time then there might not have been another chance. He had unwittingly made a contract with a higher level being during his battle with Archer.

It was taking over him.

With this type of despair he could understand why Archer had wanted the release of death.

"Tohsaka, don't cry. I'm fine now."
"You're not fine!"

Her voice was loud and he knew she did not buy his bravado. She just clung to him as she did every time this happened.
The turnings were becoming more frequent.
He had contemplated leaving with the unnatural to an area far away, away from people who he could harm. But even Shirou was unsure whether he could in his current state erase the dagger with his most powerful weapon.

"Don't go anywhere, you idiot."

Rin always knew what he was thinking.

"This is London Rin, I'll kill thousands just by releasing a higher level Noble Phantasm."
"Don't go. If you leave, then I'm coming with you."
"You're so nice, Tohsaka."
She responded by smacking the top of his head, clearly embarrassed and promptly left the room. Shirou himself got dressed and descended the steps into the living room where Rin was making tea. The area was not large, easily crossed with ten steps and furnishings consisted of a small table with two chairs. The wallpaper was peeling in places showing its age, only the stove was new, which they had saved up to purchase. He was glad that he had worked part time before the Holy Grail War, Rin was practically broke and they only had enough to just about get by.

"Good morning, Tohsaka."
"You better clean your room later."
"Sure," he mumbled back. He looked out the windows to see the cobbled street beyond and the Clock Tower in the distance. The greyness took time to adjust to, but he did not hate it.
Not with Rin here at least.

"Do you have anything you need to do today?" she asked, setting a tea cup in front of him. He gratefully sipped, feeling the warm liquid descending his throat.
"Nothing really, I was hoping to take the dagger to Lord El-Melloi to get it inspected."
"You two have gotten really chummy lately."

She was jealous. Shirou was not surprised. Rin had not made many friends within the Clock Tower, so spent most of her time with him. Lately he had been so caught up in honing his projection skills that they spent less and less time together.

"Sorry, but I should really get it checked out. It could save many lives."
"Even though you're obviously suffering because of it."
"Tohsaka, I still think we should-"
"ARGH! You big idiot!"

He was stunned and even she was taken off guard by how loud her voice was, but then she made a 'I don't care anymore' face.

"I'm so mad at you. What have I said all those times before, love yourself, don't shoulder everything! Who says all these bright and cheerful things with the face that looks like that?!"
She was pointing directly at his forehead and he could feel his patience wearing thin.
"Well I'm sorry I have this face."
"That's right, you have a face of a loser."
"Tohsaka!"
"Today: you, me - date!"
She had grabbed onto his collar and looked square into his eyes. From this view he could clearly see her flawless skin, teal green eyes and soft pink lips. He was always struck by her beauty and it was no different even two years later. In his confusion he had nodded. Rin broke into a wide smile and lightly kissed his forehead.

"Good boy, Shirou."
He had been played.
She was terrifying.

Rin rather happily hummed as she sipped at her tea before running into her room. Shirou followed, reaching her door handle before realising that she was probably changing. He sat back down on the table and looked towards the clouds again. Every day was dark. Yet he felt at peace here.
"Shirou, aren't you going to get changed?"
He heard the doorknob twist and he turned towards her, before slamming his head back onto the table, face red and heart thumping.

Rin was wearing only her underwear.
"Shirou?"
"Put on some clothes."
"This isn't the first time you seen me like this though."
"Just put some on!" In terms of modesty Rin had none. And her footsteps were coming closer.
"Eh? Emiya?!" she said seductively rubbing her chest onto his shoulder. "You sure you don't want to have a look at this?"
"N-No."
"If you leave London, you won't see this again Emiya-kun."

She was the devil herself.

"T-T-T-Tohsaka, this isn't funny."
"You don't enjoy this, Emiya-sama?"

To retain his sanity, Shirou began to recite the Unlimited Blade Works mantra.

"If you don't respond I'll take more off."
He jerked upright and looked at her.
The milky white skin, the shape of her chest, thighs, arms, stomach and the lines of thin muscle and soft flesh-
She suddenly turned away from him.
"Don't look so much…"
Her face was bright red. Shirou was trying to convince himself that she was faking it, but her blushed face destroyed any doubt he had. He removed the shirt he was wearing and placed it over her shoulders.
"Don't give me a fright like that Tohsaka."
"Sorry."
Her eyes were downcast, body vulnerable, this was a chance for any guy.

Shirou dashed up the stairs back into the room.
He faintly heard her call out to come back and he knew that he had achieved a small victory.

"Woah, what is this? Why is it so crowded?" Rin exclaimed coming out of Oxford Street Station. Even Shirou who had been to Tokyo a few times before was surprised at the amount of people cramped onto the single street. He reinforced his eyes and found that surrounding shops were no different.
"This doesn't look fun at all," she exclaimed stomping her foot. He had to smile, this reminded him of those bygone days. She was even wearing the same red sweater, black skirt and suede boots. The only thing different was that her hair was now clipped and resting on her right shoulder exposing the nape of her neck.
"Shirou? Do you like what you see?"
"Yeah."

She went red and turned away. He caught her mumbling something like he had cheated, but he laughed it off.

"Maybe we should go elsewhere?" she suggested looking at the masses. "It's a shame, I had a whole timetable planned out and everything."
"Well I had a backup one just in case."
"Oh?" she looked at him levelly, then grabbed his arm, "You're strangely dependable today Emiya."
She used his last name like a pet again he noted.
Gently he grasped her hand and led her towards the centre point.

It had been 20 minutes until they made it to a small family run café. Most tables had been occupied and Shirou walked up to the till, he was always nervous when speaking to strangers in English.
"Urm, table for two please."
"Sure, pick anywhere you want."
At least that's what he thought she said. He looked towards Rin who had already chosen a window seat. It was times like these that he was glad for her decisiveness. He took the seat opposite her while she looked over the menu.
"Apparently the carrot cake here is really good."
"I'll pass. Sweet stuff."
Shirou mentally hit himself, he totally forgot that she avoided eating sweet food.
"… no actually I'll try some."
She looked a bit embarrassed and Shirou felt a wave of affection for her. Rin was always sensitive of others when needed to be.

"Ah, yeah I'll go up to order then."

After repeating several times his request in broken English, he sat down taking the snide remarks from Rin. He knew his English was bad but he couldn't help it, it was not as if he had planned to come to London until recently.
"Hey Shirou," her voice turned deadly serious. "I know you refused to become a member of the Clock Tower, but I was wondering what you are going to do now."
"Since I acquired the power to sense things that should not exist, I was hoping to destroy them all."
"There are too many."

She was right, he could already sense a few hundred in London alone. Even if he was to travel the world, there were not enough years in his lifespan to complete the task.
However…

"I can make a contr-"
"To make a contract with a higher level does not stop the creation process."

Again she was right, even if he was to become a counter guardian there were too many unnatural occurrences taking place in the world for him to stop by himself.

"Each thing I destroy helps in the long run."
"How interesting Emiya," she said staring at him coldly. "That you should use the word 'thing.' Some of those unnatural 'things' are people."
"Sorry."

It was starting to annoy him how right she always was.

"Most are harmless Shirou, I would not let it get to you too much."
"I know but that dagger at our house, that is not harmless. In the wrong hands it can cause widespread damage."
"Let the Clock Tower handle things like that."
"If you destroy it, it solves more problems."
"You sound like Archer!"

Shirou was taken off guard as she raised her voice. Surrounding people took a startled look at her before looking away politely.
But…
She was right.
Two years ago Emiya Shirou would never think of destroying things because it was easier. He would have wanted a more peaceful resolution, a way to make everyone happy.
"Sorry Rin, you're right."
She did not look unsatisfied, but she still crossed her arms and legs. Shirou reached out an open hand towards her, palm facing the ceiling. She looked at it tentatively before reaching out her own hand and grasping it.
Her intelligent yet childlike actions made him chuckle.

The single cake arrived which they had shared, followed by two cups of filtered coffee. She sighed in content after finishing the cake almost singlehandedly.
"Thank you for the food."
"You're welcome," he said smiling.
"I wasn't referring to you, but sure."
She still had the tongue of a viper.

"Well, Shirou. What are you going to do?"
"Travel?"
He half meant this, he wanted more life experience. However, this was not just simple travelling and Rin would understand this. If anywhere there were people in need, then he would help them.
"Do you remember how you died?"
"Yeah."

Killed in his travels, by the people that he had saved.

"Well that about sums this up, you're not only an idiot, but a stubborn idiot."
"Yeah."
"So I'm going with you."
He was touched, but he knew that she couldn't. Having accepted the Clock Tower offer meant that she could no longer act independently like Shirou could. In fact she wouldn't even have the chance with the amount of work that she would be given.
"Thanks Tohsaka. But you really can't."
"Why can't I?" she said icily.
"Well you have responsibilities…"
"As your girlfriend?"
"I mean as a member of the Clock Tower."
"Oh that," she said offhandedly. "I rejected the offer."
"WHAT?!"
Even he admitted that was loud.
As loud as his screams to the King of Heroes in the heat of battle.

"To see Emiya so flustered, I made the right choice," Rin exclaimed laughing openly. A couple of people stared incredulously towards them before dismissing it as a joke.
"B-But Tohsaka, it was your dream. It was the whole point of coming here!"
"No it wasn't Shirou."
"But you sai-"
"That's what I said. Why do you think I brought you here?"
It only dawned on him now. This was all for him. She had suggested London and he thought that he was doing her a favour when moving here. But by attending lessons he was refining his magic, finding his way.
No wonder Tohsaka did not have many friends, there was only one task and goal for her. Only a single reason why they came.

To make sure that Emiya Shirou would not get lost.

"Tohsaka," he was speechless. Her stubbornness and kindness were both extraordinary. Rin's face smiled openly to him and his heart thumped with affection. Not for the first time he thought that this girl was amazing.
"Tohsaka," he said again.
"Smitten Emiya-kun?"
"Yeah."
"Good, that's how it should be," she said in a superior tone before taking his hand again. "We should head back. To prepare for our journey."
"Let's talk about this first!"
"Will that make a difference… Emiya-kun?"
She was smiling sweetly but behind that smile was will-power that he could never overcome.
"No it wouldn't."
She really got him this time.

The trip home did not take long at all. One tube journey and bus trip taking less than 30 minutes. The crowds had thinned out and it was the early afternoon when they opened the door to their maisonette flat. She immediately ran into her room eager to start packing, but Shirou had other ideas. He wanted to stop her, this was a journey that could cost them their lives.

He contemplated knocking her out cold and running away.
But that reminded him of Archer.
Going up the stairs to his room he found that the scorch marks were still visible, and he had no desire to start cleaning. Instead he grabbed a single rucksack and began filling it with clothes, money and a first aid kit. Everything else could be achieved with magic. He glanced fondly at his ration pack that Rin had bought him for his birthday and decided to take that as well.
Within 15 minutes he was done.

He gently tapped her door, there was no reply.
Shirou called out to her, but there was still no reply.
He opened it anyway, a boyfriend's right he concluded after getting tired of waiting.
And there she was, throwing everything she could into a little luggage bag at the foot of her bed. The items that should not have been able to fit, obviously too large for the bag were somehow slotting into position.

Magic was truly terrifying.

Her room was just as he remembered it. Messy with clothes everywhere. Shirou noticed that most of her book shelves were empty, their contents must be inside the bag. He wondered how much it could actually hold, and whether he should bring more items. She never had a knack for tidying, or multitasking he concluded knowing that she would never reply to someone if her mind was occupied on something else.

"Oh Shirou! Do you think I need to bring sunscreen?" Rin remarked.
"This isn't a holiday Rin."
"You're right, I can buy it there."
"Tohsaka!"
"I like it more when you call me Rin."
"Rin!"
"Yes Emiya-kun?" she replied smiling sweetly.
"Are you sure about this? We could die you know."

To his surprise she started to laugh.

"So you do get it, Shirou. I thought you might have been a bit brain dead."
"This isn't funny, I'm genuinely stressed."
"You could clean your room?"

He didn't know if she was doing it on purpose but Rin could always push the correct buttons to make Shirou feel uncomfortable.

"You used that explosion spell! Surely you should help too."
"I could Emiya, but I don't really want to," she replied with a smile. "But I'll admit it's my fault your bed was on fire. So how about no one cleans and you spend the night in my room then?"
"W-What?"
"It's not like we haven't done it yet."
"That was a mana transfer!"
"You were really rough too Emiya-kun," she said softly, blushing.
"I-I… sorry."
"Besides this is a double bed, it shouldn't be a problem."
In truth there were many times that he wanted to enter this room, but each time he refrained. He felt that he would leave eventually and to solidify their relationship like that would be unkind to her.

But it was different now.

"I suppose," he mused.
Shirou only now noticed how much control she had over him. It was not unpleasant, but it was slightly frustrating.
"Rin, are you seriously sure you want to go on journey with me?"
"Yes I'm sure Shirou! How many times are you going to ask?"
"We could die."
"That's exactly why I'm going, stupid."
This time she genuinely looked upset, face towards the ground, holding in the raging emotions that she was feeling. He understood her reasoning, but something made him feel uncomfortable with the whole exchange.

"If you die, I'll never forgive myself," she said to him. He opened his mouth but she put a fingertip upon his lips.

Rin then pulled him into an embrace.

She clung onto him tightly and he felt her shudder against his chest. He could feel her soft uneven breathing.
"I'm never sure what to do with you, dummy," she said fondly. "I feel that if I look away for a single second you'll be far, far away. I can't take that."
"I'm sorry, that I'm such a handful."
"Yes you are Shirou. You are a lovely handful."

To emphasise the point she grabbed his cheek and pulled him in until their lips locked. He did not break away, but faced her affection with a strong reply.

She pulled away first, cheeks rosy red, slightly breathless, eyes wide and innocent.
"I'll go anywhere with you, idiot."
"Yeah."
"So let me come along, you selfless freak."
"Yeah."
"I love you."
"Me too. Always will, Tohsaka Rin."

They embraced once more, but there was a flickering doubt in his mind that he could not let go of.
"You aren't thinking of becoming like me are you?" he said softly.
"Maybe, just a bit."

Shirou knew it. If they were to die she would also perform a contract. Anything to be with him longer, to be able to share his pain, to avoid becoming Archer.

"I can't let you do that."
"Then don't die."
"…Yeah."

Steel is my Body

∎∎∎∎∎ awoke. The intent to destroy strong. The room was dark but ∎∎∎∎∎ could sense it close. Something that should not exist, something that should be destroyed.

Unnatural

∎∎∎∎∎ started to image the arsenal of weapons that could be deployed. Flashes of swords, spears, guns, bows, axes, scythes until ∎∎∎∎∎ picked something suitable.

Trace on

A movement to ∎∎∎∎∎ right. ∎∎∎∎∎ raised the blade towards the woman.

She was Japanese. Her hair was dark and lustrous, her body milky white, stature thin but well-muscled.

∎∎∎∎∎ felt a connection between them. Who was she?

Her lips pink and full, curled into a content smile. Hands small but strong. Her heart full of affection, resolve and strength.

∎∎∎∎∎ knew her. ∎∎∎∎∎ loved her.

Gently ∎∎∎∎∎ covered the girl with the bedsheets and lay beside her. ∎∎∎∎∎ searched for her hand.

Finding it ∎∎∎∎∎ entwined their fingers and knew that this was correct.

This was natural.

There was nothing wrong.

"Goodnight, Rin," Shirou whispered, before falling into deep slumber.