TITLE: "Fearful Symmetry"
AUTHOR: Nixy
PAIRING: Remus/Sirius, Remus/Other
RATING: R
WARNING: Violence, rape, M/M
SUMMARY: Sometimes, the animal within cannot be tamed..
DISCLAIMERS: HP et al ©JKR. "The Tiger" ©William Blake, c. 1794. Title is shamelessly stolen from above poem.

"..and if he wins, then we'll leave him be for the rest of our time at Hogwarts." Sirius finished, sitting back in his chair, arms crossed, a triumphant grin on his face.
James snorted. "Right, like you could do that. Remember when McGonagallhad you on probation and you couldn't even last that week?"
"We lost one hundred fifty house points and no Hogsmeade visits for a month," Peter chimed in remorsefully.
Remus just smirked to himself, hiding behind his book even more so that the three pranksters wouldn't bring him into the conversation.
Sirius, however, had other plans. He jabbed his elbow in Remus' ribcage and stuck his head between Remus' face and the book, resting his head on it's pages. "How 'bout it, Moony? Think it will work?"
Remus pulled the book away and Sirius' head dropped into his lap, not moving except for the blinking puppy-dog eyes. "You wish for me to agree to a duel between Severus Snape and you, Sirius Black." Remus repeated, looking down at his friend and hoping that this would be one of those times where he didn't get an erection in front of Sirius. Rather, from Sirius' head that was in his lap.
"Yup!"
"As a Prefect I think it is a preposterous idea now kindly remove your head from my lap, Sirius." Remus tried for a stern look but Sirius only grinned and doggishly nuzzled Remus' crotch. He barely suspressed a moan but both James and Peter caught it, as well as Sirius.
"Moo-ny!" James whistled. "I never knew you had a thing for Pads here!"
"I.. don't." he said through gritted teeth, face flushing.
"Oh I think he does; look at his hard-on!" Peter looked gleeful and Remus covered his crotch with his hands, embarassed. Sirius, however, had no intentions of stopping now that he found out something quite interesting. To Remus' surprise, he turned on James and Peter and growled at them to leave. They did, and fast. No one liked to piss off Sirius Black.
Once alone, Remus stared at Sirius, unmoving, hands still covering himself. "I-it isn't what you think.. Really. Anyone would get a-a response like that if someone nuzzled them..." Try as he might, Remus just could not get Sirius to listen and next he knew, Sirius had somehow pinned Remus beneath him on the couch and was kissing the Prefect's neck, murmuring reassurances.
This was one of Remus' dreams-come-true, but he refused to let Sirius know that. He had not wanted their first time together -doing anything- in the Gryffindor common room. Remus had had it all planned out that he could ask Sirius to spend the summer at his place and then Remus would make his bedroom romantic-like and hopefully then... I have been reading too much Muggle romances, he thought before his mind turned too hazy to think of nothing but Sirius' roaming hands and electrifying kisses.
"You know what I've always wondered," Sirius whispered in Remus' ear, nibbling on his lobe. "How ardent you would be if I took you in the days leading up to the full moon..." Each word was punctuated by Sirius' feverish grinding against Remus' right thigh.
Unable to help himself, Remus groaned softly, pressing up against Sirius, subconciously begging the dark haired teen to take him then and there. "With James and Peter guarding the portrait?" Sirius whispered, trailing kisses along Remus' jawline. Remus whimpered in protest. Sirius had been smart and had held both of Remus' hands above his head so that Sirius was the only one doing any sort of touching. It was frustrating, to say the least.
"Who...cares? Pleaseohplease, Pads..." but his desperate moan was lost as the voices belonging to the rest of the Gryffindor's filled the room. Smartly, Sirius immediately straddled Remus and threw a punch at his friend's face.
Startled at the quick change of events, Remus threw Sirius off of him, muttering some choice words that the Gryffindor's rarely heard from Remus' mouth. Rubbing his nose and finding blood on his hand, he all-but growled at Sirius before rushing off toward the Prefect's lavatory so that he could deal with his bloody nose and painfully throbbing erection in peace.

"I tried to cover up for us," Sirius said petulantly, taking his time at un-tying his Doc Martens. James and Peter had not said a single word to Remus nor to Sirius, afraid of the outcome. Instead, they watched the heated exchange of words between the two and awaited Sirius' temper tantrum to show face once Remus' stubborn-ness became too much.
"You did not have to punch me," Remus said in a deadly quiet voice. "If you like abuse in the bedroom then perhaps you could look up the infamous Lucius Malfoy; heard he is into all that kink." Remus met Sirius' stare from across the room before slipping into bed and pulling the curtains closed, as if to end their conversation.
Sirius, however, had other plans. Stalking across the room he yanked open the draperies on Remus' four-poster bed and with just as much force, yanked Remus himself off his bed. "You know nothing of what I like and do not like in the bedroom, Remus Lupin, and for your information, we were not in the bedroom but the bleeding common room!"
"Oh, well then, forgive me, Master Black.." Remus' sarcasm didn't last as Sirius' fist came out of nowhere, re-starting the blood flow from Remus' nose for a second time.
James quickly got out of bed and wrestled Sirius to the floor, Peter whimpering and hiding beneath his bedsheets. Remus loomed over both James and Sirius, his look more ferocious than ever. "Do not ever hit me again, Black, or you will regret it."
"Just like Snivelly you are, empty threats you are much to afraid to go through with," Sirius taunted as Remus left in the direction of the lavatory once more. He stopped, however, and slowly turned upon hearing Sirius' taunt. Even to this day, Remus could not understand what had gone through his mind to use a charm on one of his best friends, as harmless as the charm was.
"Accio wand!" His wand flew to his hands and James and Peter held their breaths, Sirius being the only one who sneered.
"You couldn't curse me even if your live depended upon-" Sirius' words were cut off just then as the same charm James had recently used upon Snivellus was cast upon him.
"Scourgify!"
James looked from a satisfied Remus to s soaping-at-the-mouth Sirius. Peter tried to supress a laugh but didn't succeed and instead fell out of bed, laughing so hard that if McGonagall had not heard the scuffle a few moments ago, she surely heard something now.

Sure enough, a few moments later, Professor McGonagall appeared behind Remus and then pushed past him and proceeded towards Sirius, wand at the ready. "Finite incantatem!" she cried, kneeling at Sirius' side, rubbing his back as he coughed on the bubbles. Peter had the common sense to stop laughing at least.
"What on earth has gone on in here?" she demanded, after she had summoned a glass of water from the pitcher on one of the window ledges and handed it to Sirius.
"They got into a fight.. Just an argument, really, nothing major-"
"Nothing major, Mister Potter? Then why, when I came in, did Lupin has his wand drawn while Black was on the ground nearly being asphyxiated?" Her stern tone was enough to make James shrink back and stop talking. "That is what I thought." Standing and pocketing her wand she beckoned to Sirius and then to Remus. "You two will come with me. The Headmaster can deal with you two."

The next morning in Defence Against the Dark Arts, Professor Flitwick was giving his lesson as usual, completely oblivious to the odd behavior and tension between James, Peter, Sirius and Remus. James, of course, had sided with Sirius -only because they had been friends for a long while- and Peter had chosen to stick with James and Sirius because, well, he had this fairly annoying habit of following the two as though he were a lost puppy dog.
Remus, however, sat in the only empty desk, at the back of the room and unfortunately, it was the one Severus Snape generally sat in. He seemed to be absent today, to the delight of Sirius who was acting as though nothing had gone on between the group of friends in the dormitory last night.
Forty minutes later, near the end of the class, Snape came in looking positively murderous. He passed Sirius on his way to his desk and purposely let his bookbag smack the dark haired wizard in the head. Sirius gave a dirty look but Remus couldn't supress a slight smirk. Snape's expression turned cold as he sat down and saw Remus was sharing his desk. "Lost are we, Lupin? You belong over there-" Snape pointed at Sirius, James and Peter, all of whom were sneering back at them.
Remus slouched more over his parchment. "No, actually, I do not belong there. Your mind must be playing tricks of some sort," he said and to his relief, Snape said no more, only pulling out some parchment and his quill and beginning the essay as to the instructions on the black board.
The entire class went like that and as the day progressed, Remus found himself pairing up with Snape more and more. Further surprising was that Snape did not seem to protest after his comment in that morning's DADA class. However, come time to eat lunch, Snape made it clear that he was going down to the basement to do some extra credit and did not wish to be followed. Remus took that as a hint and spend his lunch hour in the library working on his essay for Professor Flitwick, though his heart wasn't in to it.

A fortnight later, Remus cornered Sirius in the owlery. He had overheard Sirius telling James that his mother had sent a letter stating that Sirius had inherited a large sum of money and since Sirius did not want anything from his family, he planned on telling his mother to eat dung and 'leave him the hell alone'. Half-concerned for his former best friend and half wanting to end the immature grudge they had going on, he had stealthily followed.
After he let one of the school's owls out to deliver his response to his mother, Sirius turned around and let out a tiny noise, startled at Remus' appearance in the doorway. He quickly masked it with a haughty attitude that was lost on Remus. Anyone close to Sirius knew that it was just a façade.
"Planning on hexing me? Or perhaps you would like to explain why you are getting all chummy with Snivellus?" Sirius pressed Remus to the wall with his body, voice a harsh whisper.
"I am not getting chummy with-"
Sirius cut him off, lightly running his tongue along Remus' lips. "Does he get kinky with you then, Moony?" Remus tried to push Sirius back.
"Get off of me, Black, now!"
"Or what.. Going to dock points from Gryffindor?" Sirius mocked, lips against Remus' pulse-point in his neck. "Imagine how that would look..." he bit Remus hard on the neck then soothed away the pain with tiny kisses and licks. "...does Snivelly bite you, Moony?" Grinding hard against Remus, Sirius began unbuttoning the other boy's pyjamas shirt.
Remus tried to buck his hips and throw Sirius off of him but only succeeded in eliciting a low moan from the dark haired Gryffindor. He guessed Sirius had not meant to do that as Remus suddenly felt one of his nipples being wickedly twisted.
"Stop.. Sirius, be real. Stop." Remus' words were lost as Sirius seemed to of slipped into a daze where his only concious thought was to ravish Remus Lupin right there in the owlery, not caring of whom might show up. He gave a tiny gasp as Sirius swirled his tongue around his nipples then blew cool air on them. It seemed to break down any resistance Remus had and he found himself unwillingly responding to Sirius' touches and kisses. It was when two of the owls began hooting loudly that he came to his senses and succeeded in pushing Sirius off.
He hit the ground hard, barely missing fresh owl dung. They glared at each other a moment until Remus got his bearings and ran from the owlery, his open shirt billowing out behind him. He made it down a flight of stairs before Sirius tackled him and dragged the struggling Remus into an empty classroom, tossing him against some desks.
The sudden violence shocked Remus into keeping his mouth shut. The problem wouldn't be solved over talking; this was one part of Sirius that Remus had never ever seen and come to think of it, he did not know all that much about his supposed best friend. For all I know he could be a psycho on the path to becoming a murderer..

Sirius locked the door manually and then placed locking and silencing charms upon it, just in case, before advancing on Remus, a hungry look in his eyes. He kept trying to see what had gone wrong with Sirius in the course of the last week to of made him retaliate like this. It was so blatantly obvious that it was something much beyond Remus spending time with Snape during and after classes.
As Remus was hauled off of the cold floor and pressed to the bookshelf lining the far right wall, his pyjama pants being shoved down to bear his flesh to the now-stranger that was Sirius, it occured to him that perhaps he should of listened when warned that taking on such company as Sirius and James, that things would not end in his favor. The warnings from the Slytherins were right. Who knew?
Remus had not been taken by another man before, but he was sure that it shouldn't hurt as much as it was hurting right then. He could nearly imagine that he was being torn apart from within; the heavy breathing coming from Sirius was making Remus feel both disgusted and helplessly aroused. He had wanted this, of course, but not like this.. and never with Sirius as he was. Not under these circumstances.
Closing his eyes, Remus willed his body to relax, hoping that it would be over quickly. To distract himself from his body's betrayal, Remus began to mentally recite an old poem he knew that had always reminded him of the Sirius that had once been his best friend, What should, and what art, could twist the sinews of thy heart? And when thy heart began to beat, what dread hand and what dread feet...
It was Sirius' voice at his ear that alerted Remus that he had spoken aloud, rather than in his mind. "What was that, Moony? You choose quite the time to become poetic..." The use of his nickname brought back memories of when they had all gotten their nicknames.. it was painful, remembering how close they had all been, and how after tonight, Remus never would be able to be alone with Sirius again. It petrified him.. the thought of being alone with this teenage lunatic.

He nearly was sick when he felt Sirius come inside of him, his throaty murmurs lingering in Remus' mind long after he was left alone in the classroom, shaking, ill -on himself and the floor- and so exhausted he just wished that he could sleep and forget this entire thing. He couldn't stay in the classroom and so he pulled his pyjama pants back on, planning in trashing them the second he got back to Gryffindor tower and then showering until he scrubbed his skin away.
In the lavatory when Remus entered was none other than Sirius, only he was still in the clothing that he had worn earlier that day and not the pyjama's that he had just had on... "Get away from me," Remus hissed even though Sirius had been in the bathroom first.
Raising an eyebrow, he stubbed out the rolled cigarette on the window ledge and yanked the window closed before acknowledging Remus any further. "Pardon me?"
"I said get the bleeding hell away from me you sick, twisted-"
"What the hell are you going on about, Moony?" Sirius looked not angry, but genuinely concerned as he cautiously moved towards Remus. "Is this a side-effect of the moon drawing so close? If so, sorry for bothering, I'll leave..."
As Sirius had slipped past him, Remus whirled around and spoke again. "How long have you been in here?" he demanded.
Sirius looked at Remus, trying to decipher the sudden change in attitude. "I came in here about two hours ago." Pulling a pen and some crumbled parchment from his back jeans pocket he handed it to Remus, careful not to make any sudden movements. "I was writing a letter to you, apologizing for everything," he added softly, jamming his hands in his pockets as Remus read the letter.
"So you weren't in the owlery with me then?" Remus asked slowly. Before Sirius had even answered, it dawned on Remus.
"Snape.. Severus-bloody-Snape!"
This time, Sirius raised both eyebrows. "No.. I am Sirius Black..."
"No.. not you." Remus caught the look on Sirius' face and knew his friend was debating on whether or not he should go get McGonagall or the school nurse so he explained what had happened. When he was finished, he realized he had started to cry and roughly rubbed the tears from his eyes, momentarily making his vision fuzzy.
"I will kill him. Simple as that. No one would know that it was me. I could Avada Kedavra him then erase the traces of the spell of my wand.. Or I could use his wand..." Sirius' voice was deadly and low, his eyes focused on a point somewhere past Remus.
"Don't. It would not solve a thing. Really. I will tell Dumbledore tomorrow." Remus dreaded doing such an embarassing thing but he could not let it be done.
"Polyjuice." Sirius blurted. "The git used the polyjuice potion to look like me." Slamming his fist into the wall between the two of them startled Remus and he backed away. "Sorry, sorrysorrysorry..." Sirius pulled Remus to him in a hug, not caring if it was an un-manly thing to do. His best friend was literally shaking and he could feel the fear radiating from Remus. "I knew I hated him for a reason. I knew it.. Bloody well knew it..."

After helping Remus shower, careful not to touch where he shouldn't, Sirius gave the shaking teen a pair of his own clean pyjama's and invited him to share Sirius' bed with him, just in case Snape tried anything stupid in the tower. Remus fell asleep quickly, but Sirius never did and when Remus awoke the next morning, Sirius was already waiting at the portrait to the Slytherin dormitory.
Sirius' cousin, Narcissa, came out with a group of friends and he pulled her aside. After finding out that all of Slytherin disliked Snape, Sirius said that he wanted to settle a score with the guy and so Narcissa quietly gave Sirius the password to the dormitory after threatening his manhood if anyone else found out what she had done.

Snape was still in bed when Sirius slipped into his dormitory. Standing over the bed, he picked up Snape's wand from the bedside table and immediately felt a mild shock go through his body. Dropping the wand, he stumbled back a few steps and next thing he knew, Snape was awake and his wand was jabbed uncomfortably in Sirius' neck.
"Now let's see you make a fool of me.. I got you now.."
"Like you got Remus? I know about last night. As does Dumbledore and quite possibly the rest of the school. You are a filthy excuse for a pureblood, Snivellus and you can bloody well bet that I will be standing right there as your arse is kicked out of Hogwarts permanently." Shaking his head, Sirius knocked Snape's wand away from his neck and put his hands in his pockets. "I wish you the worst in life, and I sincerely hope that someone does worse to you than what you did to Remus. If it comes down to it, then I will tear every bit of you apart, inside and out." His face was close to Snape's for an agonizingly slow moment, until the greasiness of the other teen disgusted Sirius to the point where he subconciously wiped his shirtsleeve over his own face.
Fixing Snape with a glare, Sirius backed out of the room and walked as fast as he could out of the Slytherin part of the school, with as much subtley as he could muster. Entering the Great Hall, he was given curious looks as it was un-known for Sirius Black to be late when there was food, but today there had been more important things than food to deal with.
Taking his place across from James and Peter, Sirius looked around for Remus and caught him at the very empty end of the table. Whistling once, he caught Remus' attention and beckoned for him to come and join the others.
"I thought you two were in a spat?" James hissed as Remus drew closer.
"That was so last week, Prongs. Get with it." Sirius smiled faintly at Remus as he sat down. "Sleep okay?" he asked.
"I reckon so. You were gone when I woke up.." Remus stated casually, tucking into his plate of sausages and eggs.
"Paid a visit to Snivellus," he said casually, digging into his own food and ignoring the looks James and Peter were giving the two. What they didn't know wouldn't hurt them. They would find out in due time.. Secrets were never kept secret around Hogwarts and besides, when Snape's punishment became public, the two would have to tell, but until then, it seemed better to keep things quiet. For now.
When James had left to try and talk Lily into going to Hogsmeade with him -Peter followed- Remus casually brought up the letter. "You really were jealous of Severus?"
"Yeah. Why do you think I kept targeting him between classes when you two weren't joined at the hip? James wanted to hex him a few times, but we were not sure if his aim would be good enough to not hit you so I resorted to good ole ridicule." Sirius purred jokingly when Remus petted his messy black hair.
"You sound like a cat," he pointed out.
In response, Sirius just growled, though it sounded more dog-like than cat-like, causing half of the Gryffindor table to start and then laugh.
Remus shook his head and smiled down into his eggs.

Fin