Title/Series Info: Confessions of a Misspent Youth
Pairing Jack/Ianto
Rating/Warning: T for language and minor gropage, slight spoilers for Fragments
Summary: One shot. Jack likes to play games and is curious about something.
Author's Notes: A huge thank you to my beta,the9thdoctor. First Torchwood fic.
Disclaimer: Not mine, nope. BBC and RTD own them.

It was Jack. Ianto could hear him approaching stealthily. Did his boss realize how his scent always gave him away, he wondered? Ianto continued to file, waiting for him to get a little closer before speaking. "What is it, Jack?" Ianto asked, his right arm deep in the filing cabinet.

"How did you know it was me?"

"It's always you, Jack," said Ianto chuckling. "No one else comes down here."

"Oh." Jack was so close now that Ianto could hear his deep steady breathing. "Truth or dare."

"Jack, I'm working here," Ianto said, turning and shutting the cabinet drawer as he crossed his arms over his chest. He knew in his heart how this would end, how it always ended.

"Truth or dare," Jack repeated, his blue eyes twinkling.

Ianto sighed dramatically. "Fine, if it will make you go away then truth."

"Truth?" Jack sounded disappointed. "Okay, let's play this. Dare or dare."

"Nope. You can't change the rules now."

"But you always choose dare," Jack protested.

"Not after last time," Ianto said, pursing his lips.

"That could have happened to anyone."

"We had to call Owen."

"Would you have rather gone to the A&E?"

"Not the point," Ianto said. "Look, I do have work to do here."

"Now don't get pissed off," Jack said in mock offense.

"Truth, or get out." Ianto pointed back toward the door.

"Fine then, truth." Jack smiled and moved closer. "I was up in my office, doing some filing myself and something occurred to me."

It was then that Ianto figured it out. Jack was playing him. He wanted him to choose truth because he wanted an answer to something. "And," Ianto said pointedly.

"I was updating the personnel records when I came across something I've always wondered about."

"What?"

"You were arrested."

Here we go, Ianto thought. "That was years ago."

"Shoplifting, at a chemist's shop?"

"Truth, now can I get back to work?"

"Not so fast. What did you shoplift?"

"I was young and stupid. What difference does that make now? Are you afraid you're fucking a hardened criminal?"

Jack grinned leaning forward. "As long as you're hardened," he said, giving Ianto's crotch a quick squeeze.

"Bastard," Ianto said moving further away and trying to keep the smile from his lips.

"Tell me what you nicked. What was it? Drugs?"

"Drugs? They keep those behind the counter, idiot. I was a kid. I just grabbed something."

"What then, lipstick?"

"What is it with you and lipstick?"

"I think you'd look hot with deep red lips," Jack said, waggling his eyebrows.

"Forget it. Look, it was a prank. A stupid prank."

"Someone put you up to it?"

"Yes, someone put me up to it."

"So what was it?"

Ianto stared at his shoes. He could feel the heat rising to his face. Jack was becoming more animated now. He was obviously enjoying the situation very much.

"Maybe I should access the original record?" Jack taunted.

"It won't tell you anything more. The arresting officer knew my mother. He cut me a break and didn't put what I stole into his report."

"I know. I already checked." Jack sounded disappointed.

"Damnit, Jack," Ianto said, his temper rising. "What does it matter?"

"Just tell me and I'll go," Jack replied.

"I wanted to steal a box of condoms, but there was a clerk in that aisle stocking something. I was nervous and my mate was glaring at me from through the window. He was getting tired of waiting." Ianto stopped, looking into Jack's eyes. "I looked back in the condom aisle and the clerk was watching me. She then looked out the window and I could see she was suspicious. I ran for the door grabbing the first thing I could."

"Which was…"

Ianto looked heavenward wishing the floor would open up and swallow him whole. "A pregnancy test," he answered stalking away, Jack's laughter reverberating off the walls behind him. Ianto gritted his teeth.

Payback is a bitch.