Disclaimer: This entire fanfiction is a work of parody and no offense is meant towards Naruto. I do not own the series, nor am I being compensated in any way for this. If you have no sense of humor, now is probably a good time to look at another fanfiction. This chapter covers chapters 1-8 of the manga.
Chapter 1: The Introduction Arc
As story begins, Naruto is caught vandalizing a monument of some old guys. Spoiler, the bust that resembles him is his daddy.
Naruto transforms into a hot naked woman with whiskers and steals a scroll of such monumental importance that readers never hear of it again. Learns a jutsu that seems OP, but is easily defeated countless times by future enemies. Officially becomes the world's flashiest ninja and gains a follower in Konohamaru, a gap-toothed crybaby.
Two characters are introduced: Sakura, the most useless character to ever force her way into a series (until the time skip), and Sasuke, the biggest Marty-Stu character to appear in an anime since Broly wore out his welcome in Dragon Ball Z. Sakura has psychological issues. Naruto kisses Sasuke. Fan girls cream their panties.
Naruto is placed on a squad with Sakura and Sasuke. Absolutely no one saw that coming. Kakashi is placed as their sensei and teaches them the value of teamwork by shoving his fingers up Naruto's ass. Sasuke is a head. Sakura is useless. Writer is moved.
Author's Note: I honestly did not expect to begin writing another Naruto series, particularly given that I still have yet to complete any other fanfics…but crack fics are nice and relaxing for me and I won't be in any rush to finish this. Just a recap of the various Naruto manga arcs with my own twist on things. Enjoy!
Crow