The night had dragged on so much more cruel so much more suffocating and Alex felt that tightness as if her own air was being cut off. She'd watched as a woman whom believed in Kara but was angry at Supergirl, do the impossible not even the future Brainy could fathom as an option. She watched as the tiny compartment spread out and covered the kryptonian's figure sealing off her body her air into the enclosed capsule knowing this was murderous in itself. How could her sister handle the enclosure when Alex knew for a fact that Kara had a form of claustrophobia that had plagued her with nightmares that had surfaced again with the first encounter with Psi. Truth was, she couldn't but thanks to Lena's efforts her option...Alex's sister was alive.

Alex's shaking brown orbs watched from the doorway, unable to pull herself from that place for fear if she did her sister would be pulled back under into seizures or worse. She hadn't even comprehended the approaching footsteps, her thoughts too focused on the woman still unconscious that she couldn't see her face of.

"Alex.." Danvers turned her head to find a set of concerned yet hopeful emerald hues and for a moment she allowed Lena's voice and stare to keep her locked in place. Then a cup was handed to her and she could never be so very grateful as she was to have something to keep her alert. "I figured you could use it."

"Thank you." She tried to keep a steady calm in her voice but even she was aware of the tremble in the tone. Alex tore her eyes from Lena's to take a sip of the coffee bringing her gaze back over the figure of Supergirl, and she barely saw the rise and fall of her chest. "Too close."

"Excuse me?" Lena's response made her curse her own slip of a more emotional two simple words. "For Supergirl?" Alex nodded taking another sip as she forced her own breathing to level out. "Or for Kara?" The Director's pulse began racing and instantly turned on a dime the moment her sister's name left the Luthor's lips. Her browns locked on emeralds and the burn of her eyes were a warning to Lena to tread carefully.

"What did you just say?" Alex searched Lena's features but she saw no ill will in her expression or posture. "Lena.."

"Flew here on a bus, that was the first indication." Lena spoke as she sipped her own coffee with her eyes now on the figure on the bed. "Incredible blues like the sky and cerulean oceans that pulled me into their current, that belonged not only behind a set of big lensed glasses but in the gaze Supergirl gave me when she saved me the very first time. Then there was that determined center of protective yet caring nature and that's when the pieces began to fall into place."

Alex considered interrupting Lena but something told her to remain silent and here this all out. "Her belief in me, her trust in me. Her unwavering devotion and support she gave me. She believed in me so greatly, then I made the kryptonite…" Danvers pondered saying something again. "I saw the anger for the first time ever and a part of me separated the two of them out once more because how could my best friend my biggest hero be the same hero I was barking at while trying to defend protecting Sam? How?" Lena leaned forward to set her coffee down noticing her hand both her hands shaking. She looked back over to the one in her suit. "We had all been having a wonderful time at that get together. Then Reign.." Her emeralds trembled as much as her body. "I watched Supergirl get battered after trying with all her might to protect everyone. I watched Supergirl dropped off the building and as she fell….I hoped she'd recover and just fly into the night sky! But she didn't...she fell...hard. She didn't get up and….Alex, my heart came to a brutal halt."

"You knew. Your eyes…" Both of theirs met once more before looking back at the still body minus the slow rise and fall of her chest.

"I guess, maybe it was selective vision or...but when she fell Alex...my heart just flat out stopped. The air left my lungs and when that little girl asked if she was dead…" Lena fought back the tears but she couldn't delay the inevitable. "...when you all took her away I began telling myself over and over in my head she's gonna be okay, she's gonna be okay. Then I was saying it out loud and I worried when the days passed and there was no Supergirl in the sky. No bootsteps at my balcony. Nothing. I knew when a figure that looked like Kara but wasn't with the personality, I knew then I might not see her again and once again my heart stopped."

"I was at her bedside. I was praying to our God to hers to every damn thing I could think of to give me back my sister….give me back my light. We both fought a cruel darkness, we both were saved by her countless times over. We both were lifted by her and held and cherished in her presence in her arms." Alex shared and reached out to take one of Lena's hands feeling her squeeze it.

"I was so worried about Sam, so terrified of losing her too...I chose to handle things wrong but I did it to try to save Sam. I know you all felt my actions were foolish they were so very Luthor. I know I destroyed the confidence Supergirl had in me. I knew it when I went off on her about the kryptonite…" Lena clenched tight to Alex's hand. "When I demanded to know what her real name was and she said it's...it would change how I looked at her, and for that moment I really believed that all I saw her as was someone with nothing but a God complex. God Alex...I told my best friend something like...wait…"

Alex met her eyes once more and Lena's shivered with the shock and nervousness hitting her features along with the realization. "Edge...the coffee…"

"She flew in her cardigans so fast she nearly broke her own personal speed record...you in her arms and the panic in her eyes the fear….I was seeing my sister dying as you were."

"The plane. Me telling her to let me go." The Director nodded with them both looking back at their precious light. "I HAVE to figure out a way to detoxify the air. I can't condemn her to that imprisonment Alex.." Lena was about to turn away walk away to find Brainy but Alex kept a firm grip on the woman's hand. "Alex.."

"I think you should hear something...I heard on my sister's stereo the night after the World Killers were gone for good. I had come to check on her and what I found was her standing before the screen doors staring out into the night sky, in sweatpants and a tank, my college tank. She stood there with her suit crumpled in her hand clenching it tightly and her whole entire frame was trembling. I was about to approach her when I heard this.." Alex unlocked the phone belonging to her sister and went to Kara's playlists and showed Lena the screen. "She labeled this list 'Reminder'." Alex pulled up a song and hit play pushing the phone against Lena's chest and releasing her hand to walk out of the room with her coffee.

"So many years caught in the dark,

Hopeful and yet falling apart..

I was sick and tired of wasting away,

Then I finally realized which path I should take…

For so long…

Oh how I didn't know where,

I was going I was LONG gone,

Defeated and out of air…

But you live and you learn...to fight,

And do nothing but what you love..

Yeah it seemed like the longest time!

For me to get it right…

Yeah you live and you learn!"

Lena felt a silence come over her as those lyrics hit her like a ton of bricks. She looked away from the phone and to her best friend, a prisoner of her own design. A victim of a device she had made. Tears slipped from her eyes rolling down her cheeks. More of the song played until she met near the end of the ballad.

"So many years caught in the dark….

Then I finally realized this is what I want…"

Her emeralds shook harder than they had before and the tears would not relent from their cascading tumble. She had to know and Lena looked down at the device in her hand. She scrolled to where Kara kept simple notes, reminders to herself she'd once shown her boss and they laughed about how they should make alerts for them too. Lena went to that memo and under DECEPTION she clicked on the file..

How her fears are my own,

How she feels so isolated I feel that I am alone.

My angers at myself my own morality,

Her disappointment at my actions, her disappointment in me.

My love for those eyes, I've lost that one right,

Take away my sun, leave me caged in the night.

She was my reminder of real love of humanity,

I've destroyed my own heart my crystal clarity.

Should she ever see behind the mask at what's real,

I wonder if her eyes would be cold how she'd feel.

I cannot tell her, it kills me not to speak,

I condemned my own life and I feel so darn weak.

I was told once she'd hate me if she found out,

How foolish of me to really think that I could doubt.

I'm her hero, I'm her shadow,

I'm so caring, I'm just shallow.

She's my light, I've ruined this all,

Maybe when Reign dropped me I should have ended in that fall_

- 'Live and Learn' by Andres Badler-

Remember Kara Zor-El...remind her everyday as Kara Danvers she's not alone. Remind her even if you are breaking, reminder her even when you cry inside. Remind her I'm her darkness, that she's always been my light_

Lena didn't even realize she'd moved but her body knew the path and it was toward the one lying helpless lying defeated and lying trapped. She flicked the song on repeat and began to hum to the beat as she pulled up a stool right at Supergirl's bedside sitting down and reaching for one of Kara's hands. Lena listened to the Lyrics and began to sing to them, to remind her how similar their thoughts ran. Kara was not a darkness, she was not someone with a God complex. She was Kara. She was Lena's best friend and her hero. She was everything her heart had told her and when her everything woke up, Lena would be right there. She'd tell her that Kara IS her everything. She'd be there...to remind her...to live and to learn..

- How we fight off the dark parts of our lives, how we struggle sometimes to find a light to help us heal from our wounds. Sometimes whom we believe we let down are the ones who believe in us most. Learn to live, live to learn...