A.N./ Because really, you can apply this to real life.

OH MY GODS THE DEMIGOD DIARIES CAME OUT SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

Annabeth Chase did not get bored easily.

Unfortunately, it was one of those days where nobody was at camp: Percy was out on some swimming meet with his team, her cabin was at school, Grover was mysteriously missing (last seen heading into the woods with Juniper), et cetera, et cetera.

As if on cue, the door to her cabin blew open. Annabeth swiveled around, her hand shooting under her pillow to reach for her knife.

"Whoa, Annie!" Thalia Grace grinned in all her sadistic glory. "'S just me!"

Annabeth let her hand drop, although she was smirking. "Thalia, don't ever do that again...but that's besides the point. What brings?"

Thalia shrugged, plopping down on Annabeth's bed. "Well, the camp is, like, deserted, and I'm pretty sure you didn't want to watch Chiron or Mr. D play another boring game of whatever they play." She wickedly grinned. "But I have an idea!"

Annabeth swallowed. Whenever Thalia got that look on her face, along with an "idea", Percy and Nico usually ended up falling off of some tall building, and Jason had to be called to fly them safely to the ground. Lately, the "tall building" mentioned above had been the CN Tower, but Annabeth tried not to think about it. "If it involves pitching the guys off the Heavenly Pit, no."

Thalia scratched her head. "The 'Heavenly Pit'? What in the name of Hades...?"

Annabeth shook her head."It's the deepest natural sinkhole on Earth."

Thalia looked like she was actually considering it for a moment, and Annabeth was halfway through cursing herself for giving that girl over there who she didn't know an idea, but then Thalia piped up, "Nuh uh. That's so old. I was thinking..." She slyly smiled. "I mean, some girls just don't get into the groove with their boyfriend, right?"

Annabeth picked at a loose thread on her blanket. "Yeah...so?"

"So I was thinking..." Thalia rummaged around her pack and pulled out a small notebook. "See, it's this thing I've thought about..."

Annabeth took the notebook and read the title:

100 Ways to Get Out of a Date And Ultimately, Break Up With Your BF: Edition For Girls

"Are you kidding me?" Annabeth asked in disbelief. "That—that—who are you and what have you done to Thalia Grace?"

"Well, no...why would I be?" Thalia frowned, puzzled.

Annabeth groaned as she flipped open the book. "You so owe me a cookie after this."

She paused, thinking, and then began to write.

1. Fake an injury (or actually hurt yourself, but then, that would just be emo…wait, then every suggestion in this way would be emo…oh, what the hell, just read!)

"Annabeth?"

"Hmm?"

"I've officially decided that you're evil and weird."

"Hey, it was your idea! Now shut up and let me write!"

Examples

Scene 1: In which you are in school, and the soda can in some weirdo's hand has just spilled onto the floor.

You are walking down the hallway. You see your pervert boyfriend. You see the spill on the floor. *Cue exaggerated slip-and-fall*

Thalia scratched her head. "What if some nerdy guy wasn't there with a soda, and there was no slip on the floor?"

Annabeth rolled her eyes. "It's all a matter of perspective, Thals. You can either look at it optimistically, and see a puddle, or look at it the way that you're looking at it." She gave Thalia the pen and book. "Your turn."

Scene 2: In which you are at home, and you have a large pool.

You're in your bedroom, looking out the window. Your idiot boyfriend calls you. You hang up on him and "accidently" throw yourself out the window into the pool.

"Of course, if your boyfriend is a son of Poseidon," Thalia smirked while scribbling, "this won't work.

Annabeth swatted her.

Thalia perked up. "That's right! I forgot about the trampoline, usable on Fish Faces and regular guys alike!"

(Note: If you don't have a pool, use a trampoline. If you don't have a trampoline, just…forget it. You've sealed your doom.)

Annabeth tapped the pencil against the floor, thinking. Drawing upon real-life experiences from home, she began to write.

Scene 3: In which you use your hatred your siblings have for you as a tool.

Thalia groaned. "With you, everything's a tool." Thankfully, she didn't press upon her choice of the scene.

Annabeth smirked, softly shoving her friend. "That's because I'm a daughter of Athena, and in my eyes, everything is a tool, no matter how much it seems like it can't be a tool."

Thalia raised an eyebrow. "Well, don't kill me for saying this, but if you see everything as a tool, then you can use Percy's head as a Whack-a-Mole mallet."

"I've been there, done that," Annabeth innocently said. "Would you like details?"

"...Um, I'll pass, thanks."

Annabeth smiled, turning back to writing. "I thought as much."

Your little (or older) brother (or sister) drops something on your head because he (or she) hates your guts, which is understandable. This, at least, is something that can actually happen to you in real life. If you do not have siblings, use your parents as an alternate material. Piss them off, and hopefully, they'll ground you until you're eighty.

"Well, considering that one of our parents are godly," Thalia mused, "and my mom's dead, and your step-mom hates your guts, I'd say that they'd ground us until we're...oh, about two hundred."

Annabeth sighed. "People can't live to two hundred, Thals."

"Well, excuse me," Thalia huffed, crossing her arms. "Hunter here. And now, you made our parents sound like a piece of sewing fabric, the way you said 'alternate material'."

Annabeth's eyes widened. "But it was deliberate!"

The Hunter stifled a snort as she swiped away the notebook and pen. "Gimme that!"

2. You "got sick"

Examples

Scene 1: In which you freeze.

"See?" Thalia said. "Blunt and to the point. It's perfect!"

Annabeth sighed. "Your ideas are so unoriginal..."

"And yours aren't?" Thalia demanded.

Stand out in the rain and get hypothermia. Guaranteed to work...10% of the time—if it isn't raining, stand in a cold shower until you turn blue.

"Again, the problem with Seaweed Brain," Thalia muttered. "But of course, Annabeth, you won't be using this thing, so I'm sure everything will work out just fine."

"Who says I'm not going to use it on him as a practical joke?" Annabeth retorted. "My turn."

Scene 2: In which you flock to whatever you're allergic to.

"Flock? Seriously?" Thalia laughed. "Who uses the word 'flock' anymore?"

"...Me?" Annabeth took a shot at the question.

Thalia didn't seem to have a good answer to that, so she just blankly stared back at Annabeth, who smirked and began writing..

Take what you're allergic to and eat it or stick it as close as you can to your face. If you aren't allergic to anything, go to your boyfriend that you want to break up with. Surely, you must be allergic to him. If you aren't, why the hell are you reading this guide?

"Yeah," Annabeth frowned after a small pause. "Why the Hades am I writing this thing with you?"

"'Cause you're crazy, like me!" Thalia broadly grinned, slinging an arm around Annabeth's shoulders. "How about it? Don't deny it. Anyone who's spent two years with me and..." Thalia's expression turned sour for a moment, but it passed. "...Luke should have more than a couple screws loose in their head."

"I never said I didn't," Annabeth muttered, thrusting the notebook into Thalia's face.

"Ow!"

Scene 3: In which you eat disgusting stuff.

"That was even more blunt," Annabeth observed. "And why would anyone eat disgusting stuff?"

"A girl who would go to desperate measures to break up with her boyfriend indirectly," Thalia said matter-of-factly. Then, her eyes lit up. "OH MY GODS! ANNABETH, I HAVE A GREAT IDEA FOR THE NEXT ONE! CAN I DO IT? PLEASE? PLEASE? PLEASE?" Thalia gave her puppy dog eyes, which Annabeth could confidently say didn't work at all with that black eyeliner and goth look.

"Okay, fine!" Annabeth yelped. "I didn't have a good idea, anyways..."

Thalia quickly began to scribble things down.

Take the oldest, most moldy thing in your fridge and eat it. Wash it down with warm Coke. And then take the tub of ice cream, melt it, freeze it again, and eat it. If you don't get sick from that, stick your finger down your throat until you do throw up. Please do not try to become bulimic.

"...Okay..." Annabeth blinked. "So, what's your 'great idea'?"

"You'll probably hate me for this," Thalia happily said as she turned the notebook at an angle so that Annabeth couldn't see what she was writing.

"Oh, gods," Annabeth groaned as she waited for the verdict.

It came five seconds later, and, needless to say, it was even worse than what Annabeth had expected.

3. Pretend to "swing the other way"

"THALIA GRACE!" Annabeth screamed. Thalia clasped her ears shut as, outside, the Ares cabin door (the lone cabin that, other than Athena's, still had someone in it, Clarisse) blew open to see what was going on in the Athena cabin.

"What in the world are you two doing in here?" Clarisse demanded.

"'100 Ways To Get Out of a Date And, Ultimately, Break Up With Your Boyfriend: Edition For Girls'," Thalia shot out in rapid machine-fire lingo.

Clarisse simply stared at the Hunter and shook her head slowly. What came out of her mouth was something that Annabeth had, again, not expected.

"I have got to see this!"

After Clarisse had read through what little they had written (she didn't even bat an eye at the start of the third), she strolled away, smirking like mad.

"Oh, great," Annabeth groaned. "Now, we have a psychopathic, murdering, breaking-up-dates Clarisse on our hands."

Thalia didn't look so concerned. "See? I told you that you would kill me. At least, you killed my eardrums."

"Just get on with it!" Annabeth yelled, eager to get over this mess.

Examples

Scene 1: In which you indirectly kiss a girl.

Annabeth blinked. "That actually isn't that bad..."

"I know," Thalia shrugged. "It's just the idea in itself that's a bit awkward."

"A bit?"

Indirectly kiss (or hold hands, or anything romantic) with someone of your gender. Make sure you do it in front of your boyfriend. (For those who don't know indirect kissing would be sharing from the same bottle of water, eating half your sandwich and letting the other person have the other half, etc.) If this doesn't work, which it probably won't, because your boyfriend is too stupid to know that you're kissing someone, actually kiss them. If that doesn't work, break up with your boyfriend, because he really doesn't care.

"That's true," Annabeth said in surprise. "I never knew that you had those brains, Thalia."

"Hey!"

"I was kidding!" Annabeth yelped before she could get her eyebrows fried off. She took the notebook and wrote the simplest thing she could think of.

Scene 2: In which you fake the fact that you're a lesbian.

Just tell him straight out that you're a lesbian. Simple as that.

"And then," Annabeth snickered, "he'll probably run away screaming about evil mushrooms and all that other crap."

"And I didn't know that you had it in you to say 'crap'!" Thalia snorted. She swiped the pen and notebook away and began writing.

Scene #3: In which you and your "girlfriend" kiss in the football locker room. Use if your boyfriend is a football jock.

"In other words, if you're a popular girl," Annabeth explained, much to Thalia's confusion.

If your boyfriend is a football jock, go into their locker room before a huge game with your "girlfriend". Start "making out" until he comes in.

Thalia hugged her. "We got through it!" she smiled. "Yay!"

Annabeth looked horrified. "Since when did Thalia Grace say 'yay'?"

"Since now!" Thalia grinned. "I had a palm full of sugar this morning!" She bounced around the cabin.

"Kill me now, Mom," Annabeth quietly moaned as Thalia hit herself on the head by ramming into a wall accidentally.

4. You "forgot"

Examples

Scene 1: In which you make yourself and your parents happy.

Schedule a tutoring session with a hot guy. If your jerk boyfriend gets offended enough, he'll break up with you!

"Thalia!" Annabeth yelled. "Do you mind?"

"Okay," the daughter of Zeus said, suddenly serious, as she sat at her post next to Annabeth. She began to write.

Scene 2: In which you go to a movie.

Go out with your friends and purposely run into your boyfriend. With luck, he'll pretend he didn't see you because he'll be too embarrassed.

"What?" Annabeth snickered. "That he didn't ask you out to the movies in the first place?"

"Oh, no," Thalia grinned, a bright, sugar-induced gleam in her eye. "Remember? You 'forgot' about your date at the movies, so you went with a bunch of your friends to the same one, and your boyfriend will be too embarrassed that you went to the movies with your friends and that he didn't mean enough to you to go to the movies with him so he went to get the tickets and found you with your friends at the same movie, except that he didn't know you 'forgot' and it was deliberate and so he was embarrassed because you went with your friends to the same movie that you two were supposed to be watching, and it wasn't a date anymore, so he was embarrassed and he was embarrassed and weird-looking."

Annabeth tried to piece together the sentence. "You had way too much sugar..."

Scene 3: In which you ask for academic help. Use as last resort.

"Uh, no duh," Thalia laughed. "Who would want to ask for academic help for anything?"

"Normal geeky people," Annabeth promptly replied. "Obviously.

Ask your math teacher for extra help. Get yourself in detention.

Thalia tapped the pen on the bedpost for a moment, and then wrote:

5. Act like a spoiled brat

"Really?" Annabeth asked, but she was smiling.

"Really," Thalia agreed.

Examples

Scene 1: In which you act like a three-year-old.

Start whining like a three-year-old. Complain about how he didn't get you that vintage Prada handbag that costs over nine thousand dollars you wanted. (We're exaggerating; don't worry.)

"You know, I never got that 'over nine thousand' remark," Annabeth frowned.

Thalia rubbed her forehead. "Um, I think that it's a pun from Dragonball, where Vegeta was all like, 'IT'S OVER NINE THOUSAND!' when he saw Goku's energy level or something, and I'm not even sure if I got that right, especially with the characters, because the last time I heard of that was when my friend from elementary school began throwing out theories, and I think that Vegeta was some weird dude who had really flamey hair and Goku was his brother, and I didn't think that you followed me at all. Of course, I could be wrong on everything." [A.N./ Just saying, I have no idea about Dragonball; I just saw a black-framed photo with Vegeta in it saying, 'IT'S OVER NINE THOUSAND' and since my friend's a Dragonball addict, I assumed that that was Vegeta talking about Goku. Is he his brother? I know that they're related in some way...oh, what the hell, I'm just rambling like Thalia hyped up on sugar...]

Annabeth shook her head. "I'm not even going to ask."

Scene 2: In which you tell him he's hanging out way too much with his buddies, and then call him out as a doofus.

Complain about how he spends too much time with his friends. When he starts to hang out more with you, tell him he's an idiot for not liking anything that you like.

"Yeah," Thalia thoughtfully said, "I'm pretty sure that a lot of people can relate to that."

"No kidding, huh?" Annabeth agreed.

Thalia's shoulders slumped. "I can't think of anything else..."

"Use Dora," Annabeth immediately suggested.

"What?" Thalia looked at her in astonishment.

"Use. Dora."

The daughter of Zeus just shook her head and mumbled something about My Little Pony, and then took Annabeth's advice.

Scene 3: In which you use Dora the Explorer.

If your boyfriend likes Dora the Explorer…just dump him. Just dump him. You can do sooooooooooo much better than that. (Okay, this doesn't really fit, but we couldn't think of anything else.)

"No, we couldn't, could we?" Annabeth asked.

Just then, the door creaked open, and Annabeth and Thalia both jumped.

"Guys?" the figure asked. "What are you two doing?"

Author's Note: So! Any guesses to who the guy is?

Hope you liked it! As they always say, read and review! I love all of you guys!

~bluewindranger