ADMISSIONS OF THE HEART
PRELUDE
"Thanks Ana. Could you reschedule my three o'clock, I have a feeling I'm going to over-run." The blonde-haired lawyer murmured to her secretary as she set down the tray of coffees on the large oval-shaped meeting table. The secretary gave a subtle nod and retreated silently from the mediation room.
Elsa Arendalson glanced to her blonde-haired client who was shaking her head adamantly.
There was an obvious tension within the room and it was rapidly reaching boiling point. Elsa realised pretty quickly that this must have been the first time her client and the estranged wife had been in close contact with one another. If they couldn't reach a compromise soon, she hoped suggesting a break would at least half the confliction within the room.
"You can't be serious!" Emma seethed, glaring at her estranged wife sitting on the opposite side of the table.
Emma couldn't believe what she was hearing. She understood how angry Regina was about the whole situation but at the same time, she was dumbfounded by how deluded the brunette had become in her pursuit to destroy her.
"She destroyed our marriage! She cheated on me. The lies. The drinking. The reckless behaviour which nearly killed not only herself but me as well. Henry shouldn't be exposed any longer to that lifestyle..." Emma paused, becoming increasingly angrier by the minute. "To this monster!"
Regina's head snapped to attention as she glared at the blonde.
"I am filing for full custody of Henry!" Emma snarled as her chested heaved.
Emma's admission was directed to Regina's lawyer, Mr Gold. The grey-haired man didn't flinch at the hostility of the blonde's statement. He'd seen this kind of behaviour a dozen times over.
"She swore from the day he was born that unequivocally Henry was my child too. I adopted him for that reason and now she is saying I have no rights to him." Regina bit back with equal hostility.
The lawyers didn't react, allowing the women to thrash out their anger at each other.
After a few moments, Emma's lawyer spoke. "I think a five-minute break would be beneficial at this point. Would you agree Mr Gold?"
Mr Gold gave a questioning glance toward the brunette who nodded in reply.
"Agreed Miss Arendalson. My client understands that this mediation process is an imperative step toward the divorce settlement and would like to settle with a favourable outcome for both parties." Mr Gold stated, placing his hand over his clients to calm her down.
"An official note of your client's admission will be tabled." Elsa nodded toward the mediator who was sitting at the head of the table. "I believe we will be able to agree to the terms of the divorce so we can all avoid a lengthy court hearing."
Mr Gold nodded in agreement as he stood, directing Regina out of the room silently.
As soon as the door to the mediation room was shut, Emma spoke.
"There will be no compromising with her." Emma mused, reaching for her coffee and taking a sip.
"You don't know that Emma. You heard him; your wife wants a speedy solution. Avoiding court altogether." Elsa said, stacking her files together.
"No, what I am saying is that I've decided. I am filing for full custody. This is pointless; I want to go to court. I've changed my mind." Emma sighed deeply.
"Emma, are you sure?"
Emma nodded decisively. "I can't allow her to dictate my life anymore…"
~()~
Regina was perched on the wooden fold-out chair, one leg crossed over the other as her hands rested on her knee, she tightly held the photocopied brochure she had just been given. Her eyes drifted left toward the scruffily dressed man who was picking at the dirt under his fingernails and occasionally nodding in agreement with the speaker. Glancing away, she then focused on the dirty blonde-haired woman in the row in front who was skittishly glancing around the room. Subtly moving her handbag from the floor by her feet and placing it on the chair next to her, Regina returned her attention to the voluptuous African American woman standing by the makeshift podium at the front of the room talking to the group.
A few heads then turned and looked to Regina. Waiting for the brunette to react.
"Would you like to share your story, child." The African American woman encouraged with a sympathetic smile.
"Pardon…" Regina murmured.
"Share your story. We are not here to judge, my child." The woman replied, fiddling with her small golden crucifix necklace around her neck.
Regina glanced around at the small sea of faces. Unsure of herself and if she wanted to share her story. The scruffily dressed man stopped picking at his nails and repositioned himself on the seat. Regina was about to shake her head no when her lawyer's advice from a month ago formed in her mind.
Receive counselling Regina; it will not only help you but your divorce case as well. If the court can see you've actively taken part, they will look at you more favourably at the custody hearing.
Regina slowly stood; instinctively pushing loose strands of hair behind her ear as she moved toward the podium.
"Ahh.." She paused slightly as she looked out to the sea of faces staring back at her. " .My name is…" Her gaze drifted to the voluptuous woman searching for some sort of reassurance. The woman responded with an encouraging smile. "I'm Regina and I'm addicted to alcohol. My last drink was a month ago." She immediately let out a deep breath of relief.
Returning to her seat after revealing her 'story' to the rest of the group, Regina spent the rest of the hour listening to other people reveal their addictions. This was the first step to take in her recovery and she knew that it would be a long road, but she was determined to see it through. She needed to do this, not only for herself but for her son. She needed him in her life.
Once the group session was over she helped herself to the complimentary tea and coffee. That was when she noticed the mildly handsome bearded man chatting to Grace the voluptuous African American woman who appeared to run this 'addiction group'. Although she couldn't hear what they were saying, Regina got the impression that they were talking about her. Glancing away when their eyes met, Regina returned to her seat intent with making the most of the free coffee. As she read over the brochure again, she noticed the charity organisation also offered private one to one counselling. This was something that she would be more interested in and immediately made a mental note to ask Grace about this in due course.
"Hi, it's Regina. Right?" A gruff slightly accented voice said beside her.
Regina's eyes left the brochure and focused on the bearded man who was now sitting beside her. She nodded slowly.
"I'm Robin. It's a pleasure to meet you." He offered his hand for the brunette to shake.
"And you Robin." She shook his hand firmly.
"Whoa, you got quite a grip there." He chuckled, flexing his fingers a few times.
"Sorry."
"No, it's fine. Grace was telling me that this is your first time here." Robin replied.
Regina's eyes drifted toward Grace who was stacking the fold out chairs away. "Yes, that's correct."
"Well I wanted to introduce myself; I help run the charity with Grace. If you have any questions about our charity or any of the services we provide." Robin pointed to the brochure that Regina was clutching tightly. "Don't hesitate to ask either myself or Grace. We're here to help." An encouraging smile appeared over his face as he got up from the chair.
Regina's eyes dipped to the brochure and then back to Robin. "Well, actually I do have a few questions."
Robin nodded and offered his hand for the brunette to take. "Okay. But first, can I buy you a decent coffee? I hate to admit it but the coffee we serve isn't the best." He chuckled, gesturing for Regina to take the lead.
~()~
Regina unwound her heavy scarf from around her neck and placed it on the cushioned seat next to her; she glanced toward Robin who was making his way over to the booth balancing two steaming mugs of coffee and pastries on a tray.
Sitting down opposite the brunette, Robin unloaded the tray, sliding a coffee and pastry toward Regina. "One coffee and pastry for the lady." He smiled.
"Thank you." Regina murmured softly before taking a sip. Letting out a satisfied sigh, Regina leant back in her seat and glanced around the small coffee shop. "I've never been here."
"Oh it's a hidden gem; Grace introduced me to it years ago." Robin replied, letting his gaze roam around the shop.
"You and she seem close." Regina said.
Robin nodded a few times as he placed his coffee back on the table. "Grace is my mother in law."
"Oh! I didn't realise." Regina said, picking up her coffee and holding it tightly in her hands.
Robin looked to his own mug of coffee, his fingers traced over the handle of the mug. "My wife Marian was murdered a few years ago. And after her death, we found a kind of solace in each other that eventually led us to start the charity. In Marion's honour. She was always helping people to find their true self." His voice trailed off.
"I'm so sorry, Robin."
"At least some good has come from her death." He locked eyes with the brunette.
"It's a noble cause, what you and Grace are doing." Regina smiled softly.
"Thank you." Robin nodded
After a moment, Robin spoke again. "So you had questions?"
Regina placed her mug down and took out the crumpled brochure from her handbag. "Yes, I was wondering if I could take part in the one on one counselling." She looked to the bearded man.
"Of course, I can give you Dr Hopper's number. He will be able to help you." Robin smiled, pulling out his mobile and readying it to the Doctor's phone number.
As the pair drank their coffees and discussed the charity in more depth, they also disclosed a little more of their lives to each other and by the end of the night, a promise was made that they would keep in contact with one another. As Regina left the coffee shop and returned home, she had to admit to herself that this new friendship with Robin could easily develop into something a little bit more serious if she were to allow it too. There was an air of easiness, a comfort that radiated off the bearded man. But that was something she would consider in the future. For now, it was nice to have a new friend.
~()~
"The Doc says the female was killed first then Mr lover-lover took his own life." Killian said, pointing to the whiteboard with the enlarged photographs dotted over it before glancing back to his blonde partner.
Emma uncrossed her arms over her chest, pushed herself away from the desk and tapped the whiteboard marker a few times over the palm of her hand as she walked toward the whiteboard. Scribbling a few notes on the board, she stepped back and inspected their progress so far.
"Is there anything else that seems unusual? She asked.
Killian flicked through the file. "An inconsistency with the entry wound on the male."
Emma nodded and wrote the words inconsistent entry wound on the whiteboard before stepping back and glancing toward the clock, she sighed softly at the time. They had been working on this case for six hours straight and were slowly making progress.
Snapping the file shut, Killian tossed it on the desk behind him. Rubbing his stubbly cheeks, he moved closer to Emma and wrapped his arms around her waist. "Let's call it a night, Swan."
Emma nodded in agreement. She was tired. "Perhaps Dr Isles will have something more for us tomorrow."
Killian nodded, giving the blonde a quick peck on the lips before releasing from their embrace. "Am I staying over tonight?"
"School night." Emma murmured, gathering her red leather jacket from the back of her chair.
"Ahhh the dreaded school night rule. How could I forget." Killian sighed.
"Killian, come on. You know I don't want to confuse Henry any more than I can." Emma sighed, slipping her jacket on.
The tall dark haired man raised his hands in a defensive matter. "No it's fine, Swan. I get it. The lad comes first. I will respect that nothing serious will happen until you're divorced."
"Thank you." Emma murmured, holding her hand out for Killian to take. "Walk me to my car?"
Killian smiled, taking the blonde's hand and leading her to the elevators. "Of course."
~()~
Regina was sat comfortable enough on the black leather couch; her gaze had drifted to the large sash window where she could see the first signs of winter making its self-known. As the small snowflakes danced in the swirling wind, her thoughts left the acknowledgement of winter and drifted back ten or so years ago.
Toying with the fine gold necklace that her mother had just given her, Regina took a deep breath before turning to her father who had been lovingly admiring his only daughter. A nervous smile transformed into a wide confident one as she nodded her head; ready to seal the love she had for the blonde who she knew would be nervously waiting for her on the other side of the old wooden doors. Hooking her arm around her father's they slowly entered the old church.
Emma stood with her back to her and Regina could tell that the blonde wanted nothing more but to turn and witness her entry. A whispered comment was made to the blonde by Ruby who was glancing over her shoulder toward her. Emma was struggling not to turn around and watch her wife-to-be walk down the centre aisle. All eyes were on Regina as she passed by the pews of guests toward the blonde who fidgeting on the spot. Regina noticed Emma's shoulders relax as she approached silently. The blonde sensed her arrival and turned her head slightly, taking in the sight of the woman who she loved more than anything else in the world. Emma's green eyes smiled and danced as she drank up the sight of the brunette standing next to her.
Regina's father and Emma's best friend retreated to their seats, leaving the couple standing before the pastor.
"You have been my companion on adventures and a confidant for my soul. You have challenged me to see the greatness in myself, celebrating with me my success great and small. Inspiring me to be better, more generous and loving me. Believing in me when I have not believed in myself. This commitment is very serious to me. I am so very happy to be standing here today. With patience and compassion, I promise to support you through the changes and challenges of our lives together. I promise to be faithful and honest, and to stand by your side, as we grow old together.
My companion, my lover and best friend I promise to be the very best version of myself, that I can. For you, for us and for all time. Emma Marie Swan, I take you as my lawfully wedded wife."
A tear rolled down the flushed cheek of the brunette. Regina blinked a few times as her fingers wiped away the tear as it reached her jawline.
"I never lied about the vow I promised Emma…" Regina murmured, focusing on the red-haired man that sat opposite her.
Pushing his round-rimmed glasses further up the bridge of his nose, Dr Hopper made a few notes on the lined page in front of him as he glanced toward the brunette. "Nobody is questioning that Regina. I think for you, Emma is more than just a failed marriage. She is possibly the only person you feel comfortable enough to express your true self with. As for your other relationships, like your mother for instance, that is more complex."
Regina scoffed to herself. Complex doesn't even cover what she felt for her mother.
"But that is for another time." Dr Hopper said, glancing at his watch.
Regina's session was up, he was due to see his next patient any time now.
~()~
Regina followed the Dean of the University into the small auditorium. He ascended a few of the steps that led to the rows of chairs and glanced back to the brunette. "You will split your time between here and the studios if you choose to take the position, Mrs Swan-Mills."
Regina walked closer to the podium at the front of the room; she ran her hands over the flat surface of the polished pine. Adjusting the flexible microphone stand, she glanced over her shoulder to the whiteboard that ran nearly the length of the wall behind her. Turning her attention back to the Dean who was now sitting down in one of the chairs, she walked around the podium and toward him.
"I have already made my decision, Mr Hendry. I just needed to see where I would be teaching before I started." She said, ascending the stairs and sitting down next to him.
"Good, Good. I'm happy you accepted the position. You will be a great asset to the University, Mrs Swan-Mills." He offered his hand to shake.
"I would prefer to be called by my professional name." Taking his hand and giving it a shake, Regina smiled.
"Of course. I'll organise everything. You'll be known as Ms Mills here."
Regina nodded. "Thank you."
The Dean of the University stood, straightened his tie and gestured for Regina to take the lead. "If we just head back to my office, we can finalise your contract."
~()~
"No, I think it needs to go a little higher on the other side, Ma." Henry said, squinting at the canvassed photograph.
Emma stepped down off the small step ladder, retraced her steps and stood beside her son, who was still squinting at the photograph. Resting her hands on her hips, Emma studied the canvas; it was indeed a little crooked. Climbing the ladder again, she nudged the photograph to the left a little and then glanced back to Henry. "Better?"
Her son smiled widely and gave her a double thumbs up. "Perfect."
Emma for a third time retraced her steps and stood beside her son, both their hands were on their hips and wide smiles plastering their faces.
"Thank god for that, it's only taken six months!" Ruby called out from the small kitchen.
Mother and son glanced over their shoulders towards the kitchen, rolling their eyes simultaneously as Ruby appeared in the doorway holding a plate of sandwiches she had just prepared.
"So, you're finally moved in, officially." Ruby quipped, placing the plate of sandwiches down on the coffee table.
Henry swiped a sandwich and plonked himself on the red material couch, taking a big bite and moaning softly. His Aunty Ruby made the best grilled cheese sandwiches ever.
Emma took a triangle of a sandwich and sat down in her armchair. "Yep, we're all done. That was the last of the things from the boxes."
Ruby sat down next to Henry and patted his knees. "So what do you think of your new digs, Henry?"
Wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, Henry glanced to his Aunt. "It's kinda small but I love my room. Ma got me an Xbox."
"Oh did she?" Ruby tilted her head toward the blonde. "That's bribery, Swan."
Emma waved away the notion. "I don't know what you're talking about."
"Can I go play it now Ma." Henry asked eagerly.
Emma nodded. "Only until Mrs Jefferson gets here. You've got a visit with your Mother today."
Henry groaned softly. Mrs Jefferson was a family court liaison officer who conducted the supervised visits between Henry and Regina. Every Saturday, she would accompany Henry to his old house in Brookline where for an hour or two she would sit silently in the corner of the room watching Henry and Regina interacting with one another. Usually once the visit was over, on the way back to his new home, she would ask him questions about how he felt the visit went. He didn't like being watched by her and felt it was unnecessary, but Emma had explained that if he wanted to see his other mother regularly then it was something that had to be done.
Henry swiped another triangle as he dashed out of the lounge and disappeared into his bedroom. As soon as the door was shut with a slam, Ruby took a triangle of the sandwich. "How's it going?"
Emma sighed loudly. "Well, Henry doesn't like being watched by a stranger but he does enjoy seeing Regina each week. But when he returns he's always in a mood for a few hours. We have a chat and he might mention what they did or chatted about." She paused slightly, running her fingers through her hair and then letting her hands drop to her lap. "He doesn't understand why we don't live there anymore. I explain it as best as I can, but I don't think he fully understands what's going on."
"He will over time, Swan. He's only seven. It's a big adjustment." Ruby replied.
"I know, Rubes. But it breaks my heart to see him upset when he returns. I wish for his sake that things could be different. But my lawyer feels that this is best whilst the divorce is going through." Emma sighed.
"Listen it will be over soon, right?" Rubes asked.
Emma nodded. "Yeah, she thinks we will be divorced by the end of the year."
~()~
Regina gathered up the small pile of files in front of her and glanced toward her now blonde ex-wife who was thanking her lawyer for all her help. Regina noticed that there was now an air of difference about the blonde. A certain glow engulfing the blonde as if the weight of the world had been lifted and she was finally free. Free of the restraints of their failed marriage.
Their divorce was now legally finalised.
Mr Gold, Regina's lawyer took the files from her and spoke. "I know this has been hard on you, Regina. But the outcome will work in both of your favours. I know you wanted the best for Emma and Henry."
Regina turned her head back to her lawyer and murmured. "That's all I ever wanted for them."
He nodded, understanding Regina's admission. Placing his hand on her shoulder, he spoke. "Is there anything else I can do for you?"
Regina shook her head solemnly. "No, you've done everything you can already. Thank you so much."
Offering a sympathetic smile, Mr Gold brushed past Regina and headed over to the opposing side to shake Emma and her lawyer's hands.
Regina placed her own personal papers in her handbag and gave one last fleeting glance to the blonde who was now chatting with her parents. A part of her desperately wanted to speak to her ex-wife but she quickly dismissed the idea. What did she have left to say to the blonde woman?
Loosely wrapping her red silk scarf around her neck, she draped her long woollen jacket over her arm as she slid her handbag over her shoulder. With her head bowed in defeat, she silently walked out of the court room.
As she hurriedly walked through the corridors of the court house to the exit, she took a double take at a vaguely familiar looking man who was rushing past her and heading down the corridor where she'd just come from. For the life of her, his name escaped her memory, but she knew instantly that she'd seen the man's face before.
Once outside, she lingered on the sidewalk by the concrete stairs of the Court House checking her phone for text messages and missed phone calls. She happened to glance up as Emma exited the building, hand in hand with the familiar looking man.
Averting her gaze quickly, Regina turned to walk away but she was quickly stopped by Emma's parents. She glanced over her shoulder as they purposely walked down the stairs toward her. With a tight smile, she awkwardly stood rooted to the spot as they approached her. They both gave her a sympathetic hug and wished her all the best for the future before they walked off in the opposite direction. Regina turned toward the curb to cross the road when she felt someone tug on the sleeve of her jacket.
Glancing over her shoulder, it was Emma that had stopped her. "Regina. I..."
Regina's gaze diverted to the familiar looking man who was loitering just behind her ex-wife before landing upon Emma. For the life of her, she still couldn't remember his name.
Emma glanced to Killian who was obviously trying to eavesdrop. "Can you give me a minute, Killian?"
That was it. Killian Jones! One of Emma's colleagues from the police force.
"Aye Love." Killian said, giving Regina a tight-lipped smile before walking out of earshot.
Regina ignored the comment and the raven-haired man, her gaze locked onto the blonde.
Emma wet her lips with her tongue slowly as she turned her attention to her brunette ex-wife. "I want to apologise to you…" She paused slightly as if to gather her thoughts. "I never wanted to make you out to be some sort of monster, Regina."
Regina wanted to respond but was halted by Emma.
"But at the time I was so angry and hurt by what you did to me and Henry." She paused slightly, gathering her thoughts as the real reason for talking to the brunette still needed to be mentioned. "Regina, my lawyer is fairly confident that the custody arrangements will be finalised in the coming weeks but I have changed my mind…"
"What!? Emma seriously after everything that we've gone through why would you do this now!" Regina's nostrils flared. She was becoming angrier by the second.
Emma frowned. "Regina, it's nothing bad. Don't worry. In fact, this will be better than what they are proposing. I've been told by the Family Court Liaison that you are receiving professional help. And I can see that you have changed."
Regina nodded. "I am. I've been sober for a year now."
A sad sorrowful smile slowly crept over the blondes face. "So they said. I'm happy for you. Really I am. Umm, I will withdraw the custody application and we can sort something out between us then."
The brunette didn't know what to say. She was speechless. Never had she thought that Emma would do anything like this? The current custody order was brutal enough. She had supervised visits, once a week for only an hour or two. "What do you propose?"
Emma glanced toward Killian who was about twenty feet away and preoccupied with his phone before she looked back to Regina. "Ahh, I was thinking about shared custody."
Emma had Regina's undivided attention now.
"Henry will live with me and you can see him every weekend. We can sort out holidays, his birthday and Christmas at the time, I guess."
"I'm fine about holidays, his birthday and Christmas. But I propose that he stays with me every weekend?"
Emma looked a little uncomfortable. It wasn't that she was opposed to the idea, she was just a little cautious. "Perhaps we can see about that in the future."
Regina frowned slightly. She knew it was too good to be true. Of course she wouldn't get everything she wanted. "Well since we're stipulating our wishes. I think it would be better if your little 'itch' over there isn't introduced to Henry." The brunette nodded toward Killian.
Emma frowned, turning back to Killian who looked up at the same time and winked. Gritting her teeth, Emma turned back to her ex-wife. "Regina. You have no right…"
"Maybe I don't anymore, Em-ma. But we both know that it won't last." Regina seethed. "You just have an itch that needs scratching…"
"Regina, please can we at least be civil toward each other. I don't appreciate the snide remarks about my relationship with Killian. I don't talk about you and Robin that way. We've both moved on but we still need to be in contact with each other for Henry's sake. Shall we agree not to speak about anything other than our son?" Emma urged.
Regina sighed. Emma was right. That comment was out of line. She nodded. "Agreed. But I do want Henry to stay with me each weekend."
Emma studied the brunette for a moment before relenting. "Okay, deal."
"Thank you, Emma." Regina murmured. "I'll pick Henry up tomorrow morning at nine."
Before Emma could object, the brunette crossed the road and disappearing out of sight.
A/N - Thanks for reading! I hope you've enjoyed the prelude, please review and let me know what you think. I hope to update every Monday unless something comes up and I can't, but I will keep you informed on Twitter. Thanks again for all the support you guys give, it means so much and I'm humbled to think that people are taking the time to read my stories. ~ RamblingtowardsEcstasy