Disclaimer: I do not own Glee. Ryan Murphy does. Good for him. :)
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Tina always tells everyone she's okay. It's kind of her catchphrase. No one thinks differently and she tries to convince herself that she really is. When she fell and broke her arm while skiing? She's okay, she tells everyone. Bee sting? No problem. Not the end of the world. When her grandmother died? Fine, absolutely fine. Thinks will be alright, right? Tina can hide from most people.
Most. But not all.
The first time Artie sees her cry is in first grade. The class bully called her ugly and she ran to the end of the hall, her face a red wreck. A boy with glasses walked up to her.
"Are you okay?"
Tina looked up. "Yeah," she answered, even though it was apparent she wasn't.
"No you're not," he bluntly added. He waited patiently by her side until the crying ceased and finally walked away silently. The boy didn't come back to school the next day. In fact, he missed almost the whole year except the last month, and when he came back, he was in a wheelchair.
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The second time he sees her cry is at summer camp, the year between sixth and seventh grade. Artie finds her alone lying on the grass and wheels up to her.
"Are you okay?"
"U-um...the c-c-counselor and my g-g-g-group left without-t me and I'm l-lost," she sobbed.
"Don't worry," he smiled. "I'll wait with you." The wait was mostly silent except for the music playing from his iPod that he let her listen to. Tina subconsciously leaned her head on his arm. He didn't mind. Finally, her group found her, and worriedly took her away with them.
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The next time he sees her cry is when they're fourteen in eighth grade. She bursts out of her house and runs down the street to his, crying so uncontrollably she can't get a word out. He wraps her in a blanket and hushes her for a while. Artie doesn't find out until later that Tina's parents got into a fight. Another one. She got in the middle and, out of anger, was accidentally informed that she was a mistake. Her parents tried to retract it, tell her she was the best thing that ever happened to them and they couldn't live without her, but she was already out the door.
It's been a few hours before he finally asks her. "Are you okay?"
She forces a smile. "F-fine."
A week later, Tina's hair is clad with shiny blue streaks, symbolizing rebellion.
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The fourth time he sees her cry, they're in high school, and it's well after her stutter fallout. He finds her in the choir room in a weird pink dress with her head on the piano and a small tear slipping down her cheek. Artie's heart aches because he knows he's the reason for it.
"Hey," he says, his tone raspy. Tina looks up and then puts her head back down when she sees it's him. "Are you okay?"
"Yeah," she mumbles weakly. "Fine."
He wheels up to her and lets her hit the piano keys for a minute longer before speaking. "I would get down on one knee if I could."
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The next time he sees her cry is just a week later, after a slushie facial. She's just cleaned herself off and she's fighting back tears in the hallway, sitting down, head up against the locker. Tina, along with some of the other gleeks, didn't make the Glist and they just got hell for it from Karofsky. Artie knows her self-esteem is not where it should be and he thinks he could maybe make it a little better.
"You okay?" he asks sternly.
She looks up slowly. "Yeah," she says as if nothing happened. "I mean, the Glist is right. I'm not hot. But who gives a shit?"
"You do. But Tina, that's normal. Everyone does." She looks down. "Tina. Tina, look at me."
She finally makes eye contact with him after a long while. "You are beautiful. Always remember that. Karofsky doesn't know a thing. Dude can't see what he's missing." Artie sees the tiniest crack of a smile.
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The next time he sees her cry is the day after her parents announce to her that they are separating. Her family is being torn apart and she has nothing left. Artie finds her behind the dumpster, ditching glee rehearsal. She's been avoiding him all day and he corners her.
"Tina."
She looks at him and the pain in her eyes is apparent. "Artie..."
"What?"
"I can't let you see me like this." She turns away sharply.
He can't see her like this. He doesn't want to. So he's going to make it stop. "Tina. What did you do? Tell me. Show me."
Slowly and reluctantly, she gives up, realizing she can't escape. Tina lifts up her dark purple and black striped gloves off her arms to reveal the torn skin beneath. Artie gasps and it takes a while for him to process what he's seeing. How could she do this to herself? She's his Tina. He runs his hands gently over her skin, inspecting it, but she doesn't wince at his touch. That's how careful he is.
"Artie, I fucked up."
"Tina," he says, his voice barely a whisper. "Are you okay?"
"No."