Title: What would you do for a Klondike bar?
Summary: Luna and Draco get put in detention. Not the best summary, read to get the real idea. This is kind of a crack-fic. Totally random.
Pairing: Luna (x) Draco
Rating: K
Prompt: Luna/Draco, What would you do for a Klondike bar.
A/N: This is a weird story because I'm suffering from major writers block. I recently had exams and since then been suffering... Stupid writers block. Alternate Universe, though nothing is indicated about much of anything. Usually my stories go through my "beta" but not today. There's nothing to really indicate the dating, but it will happen.
Disclaimer: I don't own anything. All the credit goes to J.K Rowling, also who ever invented Klondike bars.
** This was written a while ago, and I've only posted it now. And also I'm in the process of editing another fic, which I hope, will be uploaded soon.
*
"Ms. Lovegood?" Minerva McGonagall said, requesting the 5th year to her desk.
The student in question, Luna Lovegood, looked up from her transfiguration work. "Yes. Professor?"
Professor McGonagall held out a folded piece of parchment. "Please take this to Professor Snape."
Luna nodded; gathered up her things and tucked her wand behind her ear (for safekeeping) collected the parchment and left for the dungeons. She walked quickly but quietly through the halls. She then hauled out a bar. "Mmmmh. Delicious." Luna ate half the bar, putting the rest in her bag. Luna made her way down to the dungeons, after a few insults from some rather nasty portraits; she made it to Professor Snapes' classroom. Luna knocked on the cold, hard door, and waited. Again and again, she knocked, after ten minutes the door finally opened to reveal Hermione. "Hello Hermione, lovely day isn't it? Tad cold though."
Hermione nodded, opened her mouth to say something when Snape coldly told her, that this is not the time for social encounters.
"Professor McGonagall gave me this to bring to you." Luna said, and brought the note to Snapes desk. Snape grabbed the parchment rather roughly; his dark beady eyes scanned the note. He looked up and nodded. "You may go."
"Yes sir." Luna turned around, stopping to wave to Hermione, Ron and Harry, and continued on her way. While walking between the rows of tables, she didn't notice her unfinished bar fall from her bag and land with a small thud under Draco Malfoys' desk. Draco looked at the bar, and picked it up.
Snape dismissed his 6th year potions class, as Luna was outside the door. She was walking to her next class; unbeknownst to her she was being followed. Draco followed her into a deserted corridor, this was good he didn't need any one to see him talk to Looney, it would ruin his rep. Draco tapped her shoulder and held out the bar. "Ohhhhhhhhh a Klondike bar. My favourite how'd you know?"
"Why would I know or care about your favourite bar Loony." Draco sneered at her, and quickly left the corridor.
What was the point of that? Luna questioned mentally. Why would he give her back her bar, and then yell at her. It was mental that's what it was. He was metal. Luna turned the corner and walked into an over crowded hallway. It was then she decided to re-open her unfinished bar, and it was also exact minute that Snape decided to appear from the shadows.
"Ms. Lovegood, are you eating in the hallway?" Snape demanded. "You must love detentions because you seem to be looking for another one." Most Slytherin's laughed, which was what probably kept Snape going. "Students are not allowed to eat in the halls."
"No, you see Professor; I wasn't eating in the hallways. I was about to, until you warned me. Oh I should probably thank you for that." Luna said quite oblivious to the laughing. The next thing she said surprised everybody, including Snape. She looked at the bat like man and asked. "What would you do for a Klondike bar?"
"What would I do for a - what?" Snape said. "Is this another one of your imaginary creatures?" The argument was attracting a lot of attention, so much that no one noticed Professor Flitwick mingle in with the crowd.
Before Luna could say anything Draco Malfoy announced loudly that someone should take Loony away, before she infected the rest of the students, and they all became "Looney".
"Mr. Malfoy; I am appalled at the disrespect you have for fellow students. This is the second time this month; I cannot and will not let this continue; detention tomorrow night, 6 o'clock, with Professor Snape. Severus I will leave it to you to discipline your house." Professor Flitwick roared, as much as a man of his stature can roar. Professor Flitwick was incredibly red in the face, he hated it when students picked on Luna, she was an incredibly intelligent student, and deserved much more respect than she received. Professor Flitwick walked, well more like waddled away, mumbling about how disrespectful students were these days.
"!" Snape shouted, scaring the majority of the students in the hall. Luna jumped and quickly looked at Snape, as most of the students did. I wonder if that vein can get any bigger. The large vein on Snapes' forehead was pulsing, which most students knew that it meant he was homicidal.
"Are you eating in the halls?" Snape asked fully aware that Luna was eating; he just couldn't believe she was that stupid.
"No Professor Snape." Luna said.
Snape was outraged; here she was right in front of him, clearly eating. "Clearly you are. Why lie. I'm standing in front of you." Snape was beyond yelling at this point.
"I'm not eating in the halls, just this one. See there is a difference between halls and hall." Luna said simply, nobody dared to laugh; the look on Snape's face was - well - let's just say if looks could kill.
"Ms. Lovegood; detention tomorrow night 6 o'clock my office." At Luna's look of outrage he added "For your cheek, and blatant disregard of the school rules. Anyone else want one?" He looked around at the students gathered in the hall. "No. Then why are you still here." The students quickly dispersed. Snape then left the dungeons, cloak billowing behind him.
*
Luna walked slowly to detention savouring every bit of her Klondike bar. Thump-Thump-Thump. What in the name of Merlin is that? CRASH - curse. What was making that infernal racket? Luna put the bar in her bag, took her wand from behind her ear and pointed it in the direction of the racket, then slowly advanced on it.
"Oh." Luna said softly after discovering what was making the racket, Draco had managed to fall into - not one or two but three suits of armour. She placed her wand back in its usual place, and announced. "It's only you."
"Only ME? I could kill you in a second." Draco raised his wand threateningly, his temper flaring.
Luna wondered why he was acting like this. He surely didn't seem too weird before, though she could honestly say this was the only the second time she'd talk to him. "You could. But would you?" Luna eyed the blonde. Luna saw something flicker in his eyes, only briefly though, before it disappeared. Was Draco Malfoy the Slytherin Price showing emotion?
"Yes…" Draco answered uncertainly. Draco mentally questioned his answer; would he actually be able to kill anyone, let alone this girl who looked so innocent.
"Are you sure?" Luna asked, taking a few steps towards Draco.
Draco was saved from answering by Professor Snape, who was looking frazzled. He looked at the both and said, "You're late."
Luna went to tell Snape he was also late, but was stopped by Draco, who had covered her mouth as soon as it had opened. Snape walked towards to the dungeons, and without turning around asked them if they were coming or did they plan on doing their detentions in the hall. Luna and Draco looked at each other and set off after Snape.
*
"Mr. Malfoy, I want you to clean the cauldrons." Snape pointed to the barely dirty cauldrons. ", I want you to re-label and alphabetize the potion ingredients in that cupboard." Snape pointed to one of the incredibly dirty and unorganized potion cupboard. "I'll be back in exactly three hours to check on you. Do not waste time. Get going. "
"Yes, Professor Snape." Draco and Luna said at the same time, in the same bored tone.
"Wands please." They both handed over their wands. Snape pocketed them and left the classroom, and as always his cloak billowed behind him.
"Why must that cupboard always be dirty?" Luna asked herself, not expecting an answer from Draco.
"What do you mean always? Do you have detention a lot?" Draco asked, though he hardly cared.
"At least 10 times already." Luna said, cleaning the cupboard.
"10 times? It's only October." Draco was astounded. This was his first detention, of the year, though he doubted it would be his last.
"Yeah we'll he never gives Slytherin's detentions. So of course you wouldn't have any. Wait. Why are you being so nice to me?" Luna asked completely confused, it had just hit her that she was having a nice conversation with Draco Malfoy. She never would have expected a nice conversation; with all the things she'd heard about him from Harry, Ron and Hermione.
"Why am I being so nice? Well it's not like I have much of a choice. You're the only one here. I could always talk to myself but that's-"
"The first sign of insanity." Luna finished. She walked away from the cupboard, to a nearby table, sat down and hauled out her Klondike bar. "You're really not as bad as Harry says."
"Harry? Saint Potter. I'm mean...bad…evil…" Draco trailed off, scrubbing a cauldron.
"Don't you mean that you're good at pretending to be evil?" Luna said, searching Draco's eyes for some truth. It was something her mother had told her about, the mouth always lies but the eyes tell the truth.
"No. I'm evil, and everyone knows it. The whole school is afraid of me." Draco said.
"Yeah. And I'm the tooth-fairy." Luna mumbled. Taking the last bite of her Klondike bar.
"The tooth-what?" Draco asked completely confused. Draco was so confused; they were talking about him being evil then suddenly a fairy. "What do fairies have to do with anything?"
"It's a muggle thing. It's a fairy that steals your teeth." Luna looked at the clock above Snapes' desk. Luna sighed they both had work to do. Both worked, discussing various things; books, classes, Quidditch, wands and well anything else they could think of, anything to pass time. After all was said Luna realized they'd talked about everything with the exception of family.
Luna had noticed during the whole conversation how he'd dodged the questions about his family. "Draco why don't you talk about your family?" Like every other time she'd asked the question he visibly stiffened.
"Why do you keep asking?" Draco asked. With every time she'd asked he became more annoyed.
"Because maybe you wanted to talk about it. But won't say that you do because of who you pretend to be. Maybe get something off your chest. Oh never mind." Luna mumbled, looking at him.
Draco was saved from farther questioning, again by Snape. Snape looked at the cauldrons and potions cupboard, seeing they were clean snarled at them to leave.
*
When Draco went back to the Slytherin common room, all he could think about was Luna. More specifically why he was going to tell her about his family, his mother who was to terrified to leave and his scumbag Death Eater, father. No one knew much of his family, with the exception of Blaise Zabini his best mate. Draco sat in the common room talking about Luna with Blaise.
"You must like her. Or you're starting to. You can't deny that that girl is beautiful. Whatever they say about her. And you can't deny that she's always stood out to you. If I wasn't so sure you want her, I'd have a go at her myself." Blaise said looking over at Draco.
Draco glared at him. "I can't. Now wouldn't that be the talk of the school. 'Draco Malfoy and Loony Lovegood'." Draco then muttered 'Draco and Loony' under his breath repeatedly while grimacing.
"Sitting in a tree. K-I-S-S-I-N-G." Blaise laughed at the look on Draco's face. "Yeah mate, you sure know how to pick'em." Grinning Blaise got up mumbled "Night." and went up to the dormitories, with a sigh Draco followed.
*
Draco was wandering around the school, it was Friday, a few weeks after his detention with Luna, and he had finished his homework, and had nothing to do - but wander aimlessly through the halls. Rather suddenly and roughly someone knocked into him from behind. He looked down expecting to see some stupid little first year but was surprised when he saw Luna. "Oh, it's only you." Draco said looking at Luna.
"Only me." Luna said shocked. "I could kill you in a second." Luna was trying desperately not to laugh. Her hand went to her ear, expecting her wand, but it wasn't there. Draco who had been expected this had taken her wand only seconds prior, he waved it in her face, while looking extremely smug. "Hey. Give that back."
"What would you do for it?" Draco asked. Draco was waiting for a reply of great wit, but was greatly surprised with what Luna said.
"Does your nose hurt?" Luna asked, completely unfazed by how extremely random the question was. Draco was momentarily, as anyone would be, stunned. Taking the opportunity to steal her wand back, Luna let out an excited cry. "Yeaaaaaah!"
"That wasn't fair." Draco sulked. "Hey do you think I could have another one of those Klondike bars?"
"What would you do for a Klondike bar?" Luna asked happily, oh how she loved saying that.
"Do we really have to go through this every time?" Draco asked, mentally begging her to say 'no', but she never did, no matter how much he hoped.
"Yes. Come on. It's fun. What would you do for a Klondike bar?" Luna asked for the second time, waiting for him to say it.
"Id stand on my head and recite the alphabet backwards, I would scream at the top of the Eiffel Tower while rubbing dish soap in my mouth, get a bungee cord, wrap it around a French spy's neck, go a little James Bond here and there. You know. The usual. As long as I get the Klondike bar." Draco said.
Luna took two bars out of her bag, gave one to Draco and opened one herself. Draco had been saying all week that he would stand on his head and recite the alphabet backwards; pull a James Bond on some French spy, he'd said he'd do a lot of things. Luna quite enjoyed the new things he'd come up with. She skipped down the hall, where she knocked into Snape and received yet another detention.
*
Draco walked triumphantly into the Slytherin common room, eating his prize. He was holding the Klondike bar as though it was the best thing in the world, which it was to him.
No one found it odd when Draco walked in the common room with a Klondike bar, it had been happening a lot recently. Draco sat down next to Blaise looked at him and said, "These bars are just too damn good.
*
A/N: Well that's it. Please read&review. Constructive criticism is welcomed. All I can say about this fic is that I'm suffering from severe writers block, and this story has gone nowhere, and I have no idea what I'm saying throughout half of it. Well that's it. Again R&R. Please, it would be so greatly appreciated.
** Also the thing in brackets here [Id stand on my head and recite the alphabet backwards, I would scream at the top of the Eiffel Tower while rubbing dish soap in my mouth, get a bungee cord, wrap it around a French spy's neck, go a little James Bond here and there. You know. The usual.] Was not created by me. I found it while Googleing "What would you do for a Klondike Bar". And who ever said that first you're amazing, and second, sorry for taking it. But as I said I am not the creative genius behind it. No idea if James Bond was created then but I'm too lazy to check out time lines, this is only a crack-fic. And if there are any spaces in the story where you think something belongs please me and I'll fix it. I have been having trouble with the thing deleting names.
JescaShylock