Disclaimer: If Axis Powers Hetalia were mine, I wouldn't need to write fanfics. If any of these songs were mine, I wouldn't be writing fanfics.

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Minimal fluff 09!

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Dodicesimo Notte

They had been warned not to set sail. The weather was going to turn dark, they were told, and if they jumped ship anyway, there was no telling their fate. Stay one more night; what was the harm of going home one day later if they could return in one piece? Surely, their death would sadden Grandfather Rome, who would cry in the tomb should they be buried next to them?

It was rare for Romano or Feliciano to listen to anything or anyone anyway. Why, Romano disregarded warnings and Feliciano usually wasn't listening anyway.

They had been lucky throughout their lives ignoring advice or warning but their luck was nothing against the forces of nature. The storm set in almost the moment their ship reached a point where they could not turn back and they were tossed about until the vessel cracked under the pressure and sank, separating the twins in the chilly dark waters.

Was this the end? No more pasta? Maybe heaven was filled with pasta…well, in that case, Feliciano wouldn't mind dying. Before he could bid farewell to the world and float off in the now calming waves, he felt something tug him and he was pulled out of the water. The shipman watched over him before he could break out with a cold or anything worse and he recovered, asking about his brother. Could Romano have survived? Maybe the other brunette wasn't as lucky as he to run into someone like these kind shipmen…after all, these sailors were veterans – they were a group of five that went by the Nordics. Feliciano allowed himself a moment of mourning (while in his mind, Romano floated in cackling, shouting he would never miss Feliciano even if he did rot away. Scary) but he had to move on; they had docked and he had to decide what to do.

"There's a duke who lives nearby," Finland, one of the Nordics, offered. "I'm sure he could use of some help. He's quite famous around these parts; he's always trying to get the attention of a local countess."

"What's her name?"

"The fair Hungary, and you'd best remember her name." Finland smiled, but it seemed sad. "Her brother, bless his soul, Austria, passed away recently and she hasn't recovered from the sadness yet."

"I could always work for her," Feliciano offered. It would be easier working with Hungary, he reasoned, as they had both lost brothers and could find someone to confide in.

"Oh, you don't want to work for her," Denmark barged in, walking by. "She's a horror, that one. I visited her once with Norway and she wanted us to take our clothes off and…um…Nor, what was that word she used?"

"Make sacred love with each other," Norway said, practically spitting out each word as if they were nails and disagreed with his mouth.

"Yeah. So we left. This was after Austria's death. Maybe she's a bit cuckoo." Denmark shook his head. "Don't. Go with the duke. His name's Germany, and he might be a little overbearing, but who knows? Maybe you two'll click."

So Feliciano wandered over to Germany's house. "Ciao! My name is Feliciano but you can call me Italy! I'd love to work with you cause I've got nothing else to do and my brother's dead. So how can I help you!" Germany stared back with him cold blue eyes.

"So what can you do?"

Feliciano faltered. He was standing in front of an audience of Germany, his advisor/brother Prussia, and friend Japan. "Wh-what do you mean, what can I do?"

"Can you do anything practical, of use, I mean."

Feliciano stared blankly. "I can cook." Germany didn't look impressed. "A-and, I was quite a ladies man back at home!"

"Is that so?" Germany looked interested. "Could you make someone fall in love with someone else?"

"I could try!" Feliciano's heart beat. Although he'd had a couple of casual flings, he believed in true love still the same and he was certain he'd stumbled into that very category. Maybe it was Germany's silence in comparison to his chatty self. Maybe it was how the other man carried himself. His positive attitude was tarnished as Germany continued.

"I would make it worth your while if you could woo a certain woman for me. Her name is Hungary, and she lives nearby." At this Prussia chuckled and muttered under his breath that Germany didn't have a chance but did his younger brother listen? No…

"Uh…um…I'll do my best!"

--

A few weeks later at the port, Finland was getting ready to set sail when he spotted a ship that had recently pulled up. He had paid it no mind until he went off to find Iceland (who was lingering around the port aimlessly) and when they were heading back to the ship, he saw a familiar face.

Could that be…? No, he had sent Feliciano off to the duke's palace…right?

Romano stretched as he stood on solid ground again. That trip sure as hell ensured he was not sailing ever again…or at least, soon. He'd thought he was a goner for sure when the waves closed in over his head again but someone had reached out of the darkness and pulled him aboard. He had been grateful at first but

A pair of arms reached from behind him and pulled him up in the air, his feet completely swept off the ground. "Romano! Are you alright? It wasn't that long of a trip, right?"

"No, it wasn't, but with you, it was an eternity. Now let me go, dammit!" Romano struggled to escape Spain's hold, but the latter's grip was tight around him. He had been saved by a random sea captain who had taken a…ah…liking to him and spent most of the trip to the port city hiding nearby and glomping him whenever he least expected it. Romano had figured that they were on land now, in public, so Spain couldn't do anything but of course he had been wrong before.

"I can't help it, you're just too cute!"

Romano blushed in spite of himself and looked around to see Finland and Iceland staring openly at them. "What're you fucking looking at?" he shouted, struggling to free himself more fervently.

"Um…aren't you…" Finland had meant to say more but Iceland quickly pulled him away to their ship with a hasty, "Sorry to have bothered you." The short sailor looked utterly confused but allowed himself to be dragged away. Romano managed to slip through Spain's grasp and bounded a safe five feet away.

"Stay away from you, you pervert. Don't think I don't know you're trying to feel me up! Dammit! Keep your mitts off me!"

"But Romano…" Romano wished he could say Spain wasn't whining, as it was rather unbecoming of any adult man to whine like that, but he couldn't tell a lie (wait, he could). "You don't know this place! You might get lost! At least let me make sure you find your way home before I leave! Come on! Please?" Spain looked so pitiful that Romano found it difficult to say no; like kicking an injured animal in the face. He had a heart…

"…alright, fine, but only until I get home. After that, I expect you to disappear and never find me again, okay?"

"Yay!" Spain leapt in the air rather showily and Romano really wanted to leave. "Okay, don't make a scene, idiot. I'm just going to wander around this town, okay? Just give me some damn space!"

"I guess." Spain fished into his pocket and pulled out a bag of money, throwing it to Romano. "Go buy some fun stuff for yourself. And whatever you do, don't mention my name. I'm wanted in these parts…I had a little…fight with the duke here and I sort of have a price on my head…"

"Eh?!" Romano felt a wicked grin cross his face. "What'd you say, Spain?" he asked, making sure to fully enunciate and project the man's name across the air. Spain winced as if he had been hit and pressed a finger against his lips.

"Shh! If you want to talk about me to whomever, just call me Antonio, okay? If I get arrested, I don't want you to get pulled into it either, so just don't say anything, okay?" He seemed, for a moment, serious so Romano didn't counter with a snide comment. "Anyway, I'll meet up with you when I'm done unloading!"

"You think you can find me in this place?" Romano asked as he started walking off, gesturing to the city.

"Trust me, Romano, I can find you even in a crowd of a million."

--

"Uh…please? Germany would be really mad at me if I came back again and said you rejected everything I had to say!" Feliciano desperately tried to save his case. He had gone to meet with Hungary and had found the woman herself sitting and fiddling with what looked like a camera with a thin veil over her face. He had gone off on a tangent of beautiful words praising her, Germany, and their potential union but she had just waved him off. "H-Hungary…I don't get it. Germany really likes you. Why don't you like him back?"

"Why would I like Germany?" Hungary asked, disinterested as she set the camera aside and started shuffling through some photos.

"Because! He's strong and he's good and he's really nice…he took me in when he didn't have to and he doesn't talk very much so he can't really bother you and he's handsome and…"

Hungary finally looked up, wonder in her green eyes until her face suddenly changed into joy. "You! Who are you again?"

"Eh…my name is Feliciano."

"You know who Germany should really be chasing after? Not me…not me at all! It should be you!" Hungary squealed at the suggestion as Feliciano felt his face heat up. "Did you hear yourself! You're totally in love with the guy! That's adorable, really." She held the camera up and snapped a shot of an embarrassed looking Feliciano. "Oh my, I might actually like you. Germany always sends the rudest people to try and flirt with me. Like that…oh, god awful man with red eyes. Ooh. Care to come more often and tell Hungary-nee-chan about it all?"

--

"So how did it go?"

Feliciano smiled, looking down at his feet. Sometimes he didn't know how he could have put up with meeting with Germany like this on a daily basis after coming back from Hungary's, standing before the blonde and being the focus of those gorgeous blue eyes…unconsciously, Feliciano covered his face with both hands, quivering with excitement that yes, Germany was entirely focused on him, never mind Prussia was giggling to himself.

"Are…are you okay, Feliciano-san?" Japan tried, the first to break the awkward silence.

"I'm…I'm alright…" Looking up with a cheerful smile, Feliciano rattled off the usual report. "Hungary sent me off again, I'm afraid. She's not interested in the slightest. But I think things are going good, though! She's taken a liking to me so it won't be long until I deflect that…your…way…" Somehow it was rather difficult to say and Feliciano felt guilty for feeling that way, especially since it was a favor Germany had expected of him. "I'm so sorry!"

"Does…that mean that she likes you?"

"Eh?"

"Oh, of course, dear brother!" Prussia pounced on this misleading reaction. "Please, it's so clear that Hungary doesn't have an ounce of affection toward you at all, Germany, you should just give up. If she likes little Feliciano here, I think that would be best. It would save us all so much grief. Alright, how about we start on something else, like my bird farm for instance? I've got a lot of cute little chicks that would love a home…"

"Shut up about your birds!" Germany turned on Italy with a fierce expression. "Feliciano…I can't believe this about you. I trusted you to the Hungary Mission because I thought you would…I thought…"

There was a tense silence before Germany spoke again, in a low controlled voice. "That will be all. You can go buy dinner and think about what you've done." He turned away and Feliciano gave a little sound that was a mix between an injured bird being stepped on and the cry of a wife being beaten. Japan cringed before rushing over to escort the anguished Italian.

"Don't be so upset," Japan murmured, keeping a hand on Feliciano's shoulder as they walked down the hall to the front door. "Germany-san isn't the one to keep grudges. He goes forward so he doesn't have the time to be held down by things like this. He won't be mad at you after a long time; after all, Hungary-san should distract him later on." It was meant to be a tactful reassurance but Feliciano cried still the same.

"That's why it hurts! Because he likes Hungary!" Feliciano cried, shrugging off Japan's hand. "I know he doesn't think twice when he looks at me, but at least we could talk about something other than her!" Tears were starting to make things look blurry so he couldn't know if he was imaging Japan's thoughtful face.

"Maybe you don't know Germany-san as well as you think, Feliciano-kun," Japan said finally. "After all, in regards to his feelings for Hungary…"

"Um, I think I'll go…eh…buy dinner now! I'll be back in a moment! Thanks for walking me out, Japan! Appreciate it!" Hugging the startled man as thanks, Feliciano scampered off, still trying to clear his line of vision with his sleeve. Japan blinked before finishing his sentence, unheard by its intended audience.

"In regards to his feelings for Hungary, he no longer likes her because of you."

--

Hungary hummed a little tune she had formulated in her head as she attended to the flowers on her windowsill. Hmm…it sounded very fresh…maybe she should ask Austria to write it down so they could play it at Germany and Feliciano's wedding…her fingers brushed the purple petals lightly as she remembered that no, Austria couldn't because he was gone.

She had to keep her chin up! Austria wouldn't like it if she moped around all the time! So she had to keep her eye out so she could do the thing that cheered her up…matchmaking! Yes, she had to think about Feliciano, dear sweet Feliciano and…

Oh, speak of the devil!

"Hey!" Hungary called, as the twin looked up from the street. She found it a bit odd that Feliciano could glare like that but she rushed down to the street all the same. "Listen, I've got a plan! How about I go with you to Germany next time and tell him I'm grateful for his feelings but it should be you he should be considering! Good idea, right? And if he doesn't accept, I'll bring my frying pan along. Okay? Are you okay? You look upset."

The brunette stared at her. "Of course I would be upset," he said slowly. "Since a woman I don't even know is assaulting me. What do you want?"

"Eh?" Hungary backed for a moment, startled at the rudeness in the voice.

"I think you've either got me confused for someone other jerk or you're a freak of your own kind, lady," Romano shot, walking away quickly in case the stranger lady decided to latch on him to finish what plot she was blabbering about. God, this place is scary! Spain, where are you…no, he didn't just think that!

After shooting around a few corners, Romano glanced around his shoulder and breathed a sigh of relief as he noticed that the strange woman had not followed him. Keeping his hands in fists plunged in his pockets, he continued down the street as a man ran up to him. "There you are. I was worried when you disappeared for a long time! You look okay now…did you finish buying everything?"

"What's wrong with this place?" Romano muttered, brushing past the man as he quickened his pace. The people here sure were friendly, expecting him to go buy things for them!

"Eh…wait, you're walking in the opposite direction of the palace…"

"Why should I care? Stop following me!" Romano shot back a glare at this man, hoping to go for intimidating but as he was a bit freaked out, only looked borderline normal. The man stopped, blinking for a moment.

"Oh…you're not him. I'm so sorry." Bowing deeply, the Asian smiled apologetically. "I'm sorry for troubling you, then." Turning on his heel, Japan sprinted off to find Feliciano, turning over this new character in his mind. But they look so much alike! Except Feliciano-san would never look so mad, of course.

"Creepy…" Hustling along, Romano decided to duck into a pub and hide out in a corner until Spain found him. Maybe he would be open to advances, but at least if the Spaniard was around, no one would come up to him and act like they knew him. This town was down right weird and he just wanted to go home.

--

Finally, the tears stopped. Feliciano took a deep breath as he steadied himself. No more crying, Feliciano! You've got to look ahead! And you have to buy dinner! The thought of dinner reminded him that he was hungry and his stomach quickly distracted him. I've got to make sure I get enough for everybody!

He was just leaving the shop with his arms full of groceries when he was nearly barreled over by someone who was rushing down the street toward him. "Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't see you there! You just came out so suddenly!"

"It's my fault, I should have looked first," Feliciano said, trying to balance the shifting bags in his arms. The one who had run into him spotted them and grabbed the two which were threatening to topple onto the sidewalk. "I'll help you out, it's the most I can do…oh! It's you! What are you doing, grocery shopping? It's very unlike you."

Feliciano glanced up at the man who had helped him. Curly black hair, friendly smile…hmm, it'd seem like the sort of person he would like to know but didn't. "I do this all the time," Feliciano said slowly, unsure of what this stranger was getting at.

"Really? You didn't strike me as the kind of person who did. Oh well. Anyway, why are you buying all this for? Where are you staying?"

"Germany's house." Feliciano watched the man's confused face and looked in the general direction of Germany's house. "You know…the duke's house. Do you need a place to go?" This man didn't look like he had a home to go to and he smelled like sea air.

"Germany? Why are you staying at Germany's? Don't you remember what I told you?"

"W-What did you tell me?" Feliciano was sure he had never seen this man before but maybe he had…? His memory wasn't the best, he knew, so maybe he had met this man before. He racked his brain for any sort of warning or advice but still fell sort of identifying who was speaking wit him.

"Now that's a familiar face!" Feliciano turned to the cocky voice of Prussia, who was sauntering up to them with a smirk and Japan at his heels, trying to keep up with the albino's long strides. "I thought we'd made it clear you weren't supposed to set foot in these parts anymore! Do we need to beat that in your thick head, Spain?" Prussia grabbed the man's wrists. "Sorry, nothing personal, but older brothers need to play along with their younger ones, eh? We're taking you up to the palace."

Spain glanced at Prussia, then at Japan, who looked apathetic. Sighing in defeat, he turned to Feliciano again. "Well, it looks like I've gotten myself into a fine mess. Maybe I can pay my way out of it. Can I have my money back?"

"Eh?! I'm broke from the groceries," Feliciano protested.

"You spent all that money on groceries?" Spain asked disbelievedly. Prussia pulled him along, with Japan nudging him forward. "Ah…well…keep out of trouble, then! The Boss'll come back for you, Romano!"

Feliciano watched the three go, frowning as he again came to the conclusion he did not know this 'Spain' character. "Wait…did he just call me Romano?"

--

"Look what scum we dug up, Germany!" Prussia cackled as he brought Spain forward. Germany sat up as he watched Spain stumble forward.

"What are you doing here?" he growled, his hand skirting back to the pistol on his hip.

"I can explain!" Spain said quickly. "I wasn't planning on getting back here, trust me. But I saved someone from a certain death on the seas and I wanted to bring him home. This was the closest city I could get to the mainland so he could find a way back! Honestly! You can ask him yourself! He seems to have situated himself here!"

"Who?"

"Romano! That straggler you took in!"

Almost on cue, Feliciano threw open the doors. "I got dinner!" he announced, falling silent as he spotted the scene in front of him. He had put the groceries in the kitchen and sort of wished he had them back to defend himself as everyone was staring at him like they wanted to eat him. "Sorry I was late, but…"

"Romano! Tell Germany how I saved you at sea!"

"Don't be stupid," Germany snapped. "Why do you keep calling him 'Romano'? This is Feliciano, and he's been here for a while already."

"I don't know about you saving anyone at sea," Feliciano tried, "but I was saved by a group called the Nordics. I think they left already. Sorry."

The door burst open again and Hungary stormed in with her maid, Liechtenstein, following. "Germany, I think it's time we set things straight! I am not at all interested you, okay?! I think it's time you really open your eyes and see that someone who's close to you is the one you should truly spend time with!" With a flourish of her arm, Hungary gestured at Feliciano. "Feliciano here is very much in love with you, and you are a kraut if you don't realize that! Keep coming after me, and I swear you will regret it." She held up a black frying pan for emphasis and turned on Feliciano. "And you! How dare you snap at me like that when I'm doing such a big favor for you!"

"W-what?!" Feliciano, who had been red after Hungary had confessed his feelings for him, paled as the woman advanced on him with anger in her eyes and a tight grip on her frying pan.

"Excuse me, Herr Germany!" This time, the doors were opened by a pair of guards, pulling someone along. "We found this hooligan hiding out in one of the pubs! He hasn't got any identification on him and we suspect he might be a pirate in disguise!"

"Let me go, dammit! I told you I'm not a pirate! I'm never coming back here again!" Struggling in the guards' grip, Romano looked up and saw Spain, staring incredulously at him. "Spain, you moron! How could you abandon me? I was waiting for you!" Romano, whose voice had become high with panic, finally wrestled his way out of the guards' hold and ran over to fling his arms around Spain. "You damn idiot! Leaving me all alone in this weird place! Dammit!"

The room was silent as Romano let out his nerves against Spain, who was attempting to soothe despite his confused face. Prussia raised his hand and broke the quiet. "Am I the only one who is really confused about what's going on here?"

"Romano!" Feliciano bounced over and hugged his brother. "I thought you died!"

"Oh, it's you." Romano turned and shoved Feliciano aside. "What are you doing here?"

"Can someone explain what's going on?" Hungary asked loudly, breaking up the reunion.

"Everyone, this is my brother, Romano!" Feliciano grabbed Romano from Spain's side. "He's my twin. We were going to go home a few weeks ago but then our ship got destroyed in this storm! We lost contact with each other and I thought he died! Oh, Romano, I'm so glad you're okay!" Feliciano hugged Romano again, who grumbled in his brother's embrace.

"Are you Germany?" Romano demanded. "The duke guy who's been giving trouble to Spain? Normally, I wouldn't mind if you threw him in jail but thanks to you, he didn't find me and I got lost here! So screw you!" Prussia dissolved in laughter at this, as Japan bit his lip in order not to show any sign of humor.

"Romano! So you were worried about me?" Breaking free of the ropes – oh please, no rope could restrain Boss Spain! – Spain glomped Romano, grinning as he held the now flushed twin.

"Oh, that's much too cute," Hungary cooed, pulling out a camera. "That's it! I will now dedicate my life to the happiness of others through love! My dedication to this love is pure-hearted and no man will distract me from my mission! Liechtenstein, isn't that a good idea?"

"Don't forget to develop your photos this time," the girl replied, standing at the ready.

In the midst of this chaos, Feliciano made his way to Germany. "I'm sorry about Hungary, Germany. Maybe if I tried harder…"

"Is what she said true? That you like me?" The words seemed thick in Germany's mouth, as if he was having difficulty saying them. Feliciano fidgeted, biting his lip as he nodded.

Germany sighed, wrapping an arm around Feliciano's head. "Thank goodness…"

"Eh! What do you mean?"

"I…I…um…I…"

"Like you?" Japan piped up helpfully. The two stared at him and he effectively blended in with the wall again, taking his place next to Prussia, who was now poking fun of Romano's extremely red face as Spain continued cuddling him.

"Y-yeah, what Japan said…"

"Really?! Since when?"

"Um…well…I thought I liked Hungary. But…you know…I'm not good at that kind of stuff…so I sent Prussia and Japan to talk to her for me. But Prussia just made his usual sexual comments and Japan wasn't very helpful…so when you came…and I made you go. But you were…you were…so…"

"Cute?" Hungary suggested, before turning back to her camera.

Feliciano's eyes widened as Germany avoided his eyes at this. "So when I thought you and Hungary were…I jumped to conclusions. I'm sorry."

"Well! Well! I'm very happy, then! 'Cause I love you so, so much, Germany!" Tackling Germany, Feliciano giggled as he leaned against the embarrassed man.

"So what's for dinner?" Prussia asked.

Owari

--

Note: A parody on Shakespeare's 'Twelfth Night'. I had to read it for English last year and I was re-reading it recently when I noticed the man who saves Sebastian is named Antonio! Then I realized the two were twins. So this came from that. A horrible parody, I know. I was a bit edgy about making Hungary as Olivia but whatever. I know, this could never happen, but neither could Twelfth Night. The title is supposed to be a translation of 'Twelfth Night' into Italian but I could have a faulty translator. Review please!