Bug-eyed Nuisance

"Come on Gaz. Just admit that I'm the better gamer, and I'll go out with you." The blob of a boy said leaning on a pillar beside him. Gaz clenched her fists, trying to ignore the nuisance that was Iggins. Something about her scary demeanor and obsession with the vampire piggies caused him to take an interest in her after she practically doomed him to retrieve her stolen GameSlave2 a few years back. Now she was trying in to get a GameSlave3, in peace, only to be found by the very person she hoped she could avoid. Now she had to stand in line and wait with him breathing down her neck. Again.

"Leave me alone." She growled, turning away from him as he peaked over her shoulder with a smug grin he was sure looked cool.

"Come on. Saaaaay it. You know you want to go out with me." He leaned farther over her shoulder. Gaz began to shake with anger and her nails dug deep in her palms, fighting not to hit him.

Too many witnesses. She kept repeating to herself.

"No."

"Saaaaaaay it."

God. His voice is so annoying. She thought bitterly.

"What's Gaz short for anyway?" He asked, leaning over her other shoulder when she turned her head away again. "I heard it was 'Gazlene'."

"Don't call me that." She snapped. She hated her real name.

"It is isn't it? 'Gazlene' I like that. It's pretty."

"Go away." She snapped for the hundredth time.

"Aw come on, baby. Don't be like that!" He put an arm dangerously close to her shoulder. He quickly regretted it. She grabbed his wrist and bent it away from her.

"AH! Geez Gaz!"

"HEY!" A shrill male voice called from far away. Gaz groaned and closed her mostly closed eyes in annoyance.

Nooooooooooo. She thought. What were the odds of two morons in the same place?

The owner of the voice stomped over to Gaz and Iggins with a deadly glare on his green face.

"Who are you? And why are you pestering the female?" The little green boy shouted, getting closer to Iggins.

"Who are you?" Iggins scoffed, confused by the appearance of the normal green child.

"I. Am. ZIM!" He shouted triumphantly, raising his hands in the air.

"Whatever. What do you want?" Iggins asked, annoyed.

"Why are you pestering the female?" Zim repeated, glaring up at Iggins who was taller than him by a few inches.

"Pffft." Iggins laughed. "Who Gaz? I'm not pestering her."

"Yes. You are." Gaz intervened, not looking at either of the two.

"AH HA!" Zim pointed a little gloved hand in Iggins's ugly chubby face. "PROOF!"

Iggins slapped Zim's hand away.

"What does it matter to you, shorty?"

Zim's glare darkened and his eye twitched. His fists crumpled into balls and his shoulders squared. Making fun of an Irken's height was a high offense on Irk. Unless you were the Tallest, of course. Iggins stepped back a little, feeling threatened.

"What did you say?" Zim demanded. Iggins stood taller and glowered down at Zim.

"What does it matter?" Iggins was careful to leave out 'shorty'. "She's my girlfriend."

"No I'm-" Gaz started.

"WRONG STINK-BEAST!" Zim shouted into Iggins's face. "The Gaz-human belongs to ME!"

"Zim I'm not-" Gaz tried again before Iggins started laughing.

"You?" He laughed again, Zim growled under his breath.

"Why would she want you when she could have someone like me?"

"Don't make me laugh putrid pig-monster." Zim grinned. "You have no IDEA who you are dealing with! Now I COMMAND that you leave the Gaz-human alone."

Iggins smirked and crossed his arms. "And if I don't?" He challenged.

"You will face the horrible wrath of ZIM." Iggins shook his head at the little Irken.

What could he possibly do to me? He thought.

"I'm not leaving until I get my GameSlave3." Iggins smirked. The spider legs in Zim's PAK opened up to grab a small child's GameSlave3 while he wasn't looking. The child began to scream when he noticed his newest prized possession had disappeared. Zim gave the stolen GameSlave to Iggins who stared wide eyed at the strange mechanical legs.

"Now go." Zim demanded. Iggins glared at Zim one final time before turning to leave. Zim straightened and closed his eyes, smiling.

"There now, love-pig, the drooling sub-human is gone." He turned to Gaz, with his hands on his hips, glowing with pride. "I will accept your affection and praise now."

Nothing happened.

Zim opened one eye to see that Gaz was not there. In the time it took for Zim to fight off Iggins the line for the GameSlave3 had moved, allowing Gaz to move far away from the fighting morons. Unable to locate her, Zim huffed and walked away.

Gaz had finally gotten her GameSlave3 and started out of the mall and set off for home. She was still annoyed with Zim but was thankful that he could distract Iggins long enough for her to get her game and go without any other annoyances.

Stupid Zim. Stupid Iggins. Stupid boys. She thought bitterly.

She was a few blocks away from home when she heard Iggins again behind her.

"Gazlene! Wait up!" He shouted while running in her direction. Gaz walked faster to no avail. Iggins caught up quickly and started peeking over her shoulder, just as before.

"Sorry I left you with that loser. Who was that guy anyway?" He pestered.

"Get lost." She replied threateningly.

"Whoever he was, he was freak. Did you see his green skin?" Iggins laughed, ignoring her threat and walking too close again.

"It's a skin condition." Gaz lied. "Go away. Now."

"Just let me know if he bothers you again. I'll beat him up for you." Iggins said, reaching to put his arm around her shoulder again. Gaz closed her eyes in anger, ready to snap his arm in half if he touched her again. Suddenly Iggins screamed bloody murder and retracted his arm. Gaz saw a big shadow fly over her on the sidewalk and heard metal scraping into flesh. She turned around to punch Iggins for making such a noise when she stopped.

Iggins was standing straight up, not moving an inch, and stared off into space. He looked like a robot, but that wasn't the only thing. His normally bulging eyes looked dead, and his irises were bright red and metallic looking. Gaz waved a hand over his face. Nothing. He didn't move at all. Gaz raised an eyebrow and Iggins blinked very slowly. Gaz shrugged her shoulders and was about to walk away when he fell face-first into the grass beside the sidewalk and started grabbing big handfuls of dirt and shoving them into his mouth. Gaz stepped back, disgusted, as dirt and grass flew out around him as he swallowed mounds of dirt in gulps without a word. Gaz watched for a few seconds before returning to her route home, leaving Iggins to his meal.

Zim smirked to himself and flew back home in his Voot.

"Yes pig-beast. Eat. Eat like the filthy worm you are."

That would be the last time he would make advances at his love-pig.