Just something I had to get out, I'm not even going to try and pass it off as a character's thoughts. I would've put it on Fictionpress, but uploading was playing up and I couldn't be bothered to wait.

Basically random, over-dramatic ramblings. Might make you think, you never know.

What is selfishness?

Wanting something for yourself, with no thoughts of others' feelings, right? Making decisions and only taking your opinions into account, isn't it?

The vice that we all have, that we all know we shouldn't have.

Taking the last biscuit from the tin when you've already had two and your younger sibling hasn't had any - Selfish.

Not helping a friend with her homework because you want to watch your TV programme - Selfish.

And, looking a little deeper, maybe?

Wanting everyone to be happy, simply because when they're not, you're not - Selfish.

Throwing a tantrum at a friend who is depressed because if you won't, you'll cry, never mind what they think - Selfish.

Constantly annoying a friend by texting and messaging her when you know she wants to be left alone, because you miss her and want everything to be as it was - Selfish.

Doing this, putting your thoughts on paper and showing it to everyone, it's only one side of a story, after all - Selfish.

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What's selfless, then?

Giving your brother that biscuit?

Helping a friend with her homework?

Biting your tongue and trying to understand something you can't?

Leaving your friend alone, as she wants, when all you want is to somehow magically make it all better?

I can't do that. I can't leave well enough alone, no matter what the consequences may be. Oh well, I'm selfish. I'm selfish and I'm lazy, and greedy, and immoral. People still like me, amazingly, and I love them for it, so much.

But they can't expect me to change who I am, what I do. I don't change. I won't change. Not for anyone, no matter who you are, you take me as I am, or you don't get past knowing me as a cold, weird bitch.

I'm just so tired of trying to do something that's so alien to me.

Mmph. Uh-huh. What comes of an hour of listening to songs and dwelling on something rather pathetic. Reviews would, of course, be lovely, but if you can work out what to put in response to this, then you're a far more analytical person than I. Though if anyone wants a crack at which character this vould be, that'd be interesting to see.

xIlbx