Update. This is't Jade. I'm just her friend. I'd just like to inform (to anyone whom this may concern) that you shouldn't be angry with her. She was having a really tough time and I guess I'm just so ignorant and stupid that I didn't realize how much she'd changed. I don't want to make this any more painful than this has to be, so I'm just going to say it. Jadelyn is no longer with us.

I'm reposting her stories so this can be a nice way to remember her. Because writing always seemed to make her really happy (what would I know anyway)...

-Mia

Carly glanced at the tear-stricken faces of the other mourners.

It was kind of ironic that even those Sam had taunted mercilessly really cared about her.

Gibby was there, crying loudly, even a lot of the AV club nerds she taunted had been there. Lately she had eased up on them, though. It was more of a friendly banter… especially with a certain tech producer.

She was still in shock about the whole thing.

She never saw it coming.

No one else did either.

Not even Sam.

She had been beating herself up about it all week.

Since the moment the light left her best friend's crystal eyes.

If she had gotten there sooner, her friend might still be here.

She knows it's ridiculous, but she cries about it every time she's alone.

It's not like Freddie hadn't tried to save her.

He jumped in front of the cement truck and got her out of the way, but luck wasn't on their side.

"I can't believe you did that for me! Let's get out the street before you- someone actually gets hurt, nub."

"SAM, WATCH OUT-"

A blood-curdling scream pierced the background noise of the situation as the blonde saw what ultimately would cause her death.

Some asshole on a motorcycle was speeding and had attempted to stop, but ended up flipping back over front onto Sam, killing her and the rider. Carly remembered the gory seen all too well. The wheels were still turning when they had fallen onto Sam and they ripped the skin on the whole right side of her stomach apart. Her best friend's guts were flying everywhere as the wheel got closer and closer to her hipbone. What made it even worse was that while this was happening, she was still awake. Carly could hear her sobbing loudly as the wheel turned through her. It was then she noticed Freddie by Sam's side, trying to relax her as she took her dying breath.

She couldn't hear what he was saying, but it didn't matter at that point. The blonde's eyes were fluttering shut and the boy at her side was falling silent. He looked up and the moment his eyes met mine, it had really hit me. Sam was dead. Sam was really dead. I knew it. He knew it. Ironically, the ambulance shows up not a second after she takes her last breath. Before I knew what was happening, there was crime scene tape around the area of the street. The blocked off area is crawling with paramedics. And Freddie and I are pushed off to the side, left to wallow in the horrible image we had just seen. And I couldn't bring myself to forget it. The image of my blonde friend, basically torn in half, with a motorcycle crushing her under its weight, lying in a pool of blood would never… well, could never be erased from my mind.

That's why they couldn't even have an open casket.

They didn't even get one last time to look at her.

Carly sobbed even harder at the thought.

It hit her like a ton of bricks.

This IS really happening; she is actually never going to see her friend again.

Spencer tried to comfort her.

He understood how she felt, to an extent.

To him losing Sam is like losing a little sister.

But still, Carly pushed him away, wanting to stay strong, at least a little.

Not for her, but for Sam.

Sam wouldn't want her to blubber like an idiot.

Sam would want to be missed, but she wouldn't want Carly to cry too much.

Father McGurthy (the world's fattest priest) said the last words of the ceremony and the casket started lowering into the ground.

At that point, she noticed Freddie standing off to the side, looking as if he was holding back tears.

She noticed something was off about him.

Before Sam died, he was a happy person. He'd constantly complain about Sam's antics or whatever argument they were currently in, but if you listened closely, there was a kind of excitement in his voice when he spoke about her. His face lit up, and he didn't even seem to realize how happy even fighting with Sam made him.

He always had kind of a sparkle in his eyes before. Carly had especially noticed it when he'd argue with Sam. Every time it'd get heated, they'd both get a mischievous gleam in their eyes. No. More like child-like gleam, like the one a small child gets on Christmas morning. Carly always thought it was sweet how they didn't realize how much they really enjoyed each other's company. But Freddie didn't hold that kind of joy anymore.

When Sam left, she took that part of him with her, or so it seemed anyway.

Carly had always suspected he had feelings for their blonde friend, but now she was sure of it.

She never really got why Freddie had dealt with everything Sam put him through over the years, but it became clear after a while that they were actually really close friends.

Even though they pretended they couldn't stand each other.

Carly thought about all the times she had tried to stop their bickering. After a while she gave up though. They were like an old married couple! That reminded her of that one day they had all gone to the park.

"You're such a nub, Fredward!"

"Better than being a blonde-headed demon!"

"So you admit it?"

"No! I'm saying that if I were a nub it would still be better than being a delinquent!"

"In what galaxy?"

"All of them!"

As they were fighting the two of them got closer and closer until they were almost forehead-to-forehead.

They didn't notice until an elderly couple watching the scene commented.

"Young love nowadays…."

They walked away shaking their heads and smiling as Sam and Freddie jumped apart, examining their shoes as if something about the ground had suddenly grasped their attention. That was when everything was great…and the iCarly team was still intact….

After a while Carly was brought back to the real world by Spencer, who was repeatedly calling her name.

"Carly…Carly…Carly…CARLAYYYY!"

"Sorry, I was just zoning out."

"Do you want to get something to eat, kiddo?"

"No. I'm not hungry."

"You have to eat sometime. You can't just starve because eating reminds you of her. We had this conversation yesterday, didn't we?"

"Yeah…"

Ever since Sam's death, Spencer had been different too. He was much more grown-up. He took care of Carly instead of the way it used to be when Carly had to keep him in check.

Carly thought about how life was like a week ago, when they were doing iCarly. They were all having a blast, and they had more viewers than ever before. They didn't have a care in the world. School had just been let out and everything was picture perfect.

Until Sam decided to walk to the bus stop so she could go home.

How could things change so fast?

One minute they're all laughing and having fun and the next, there are only two left and they're borderline depressed.

Or more depressed than that.

Much more depressed than that.

Who isn't depressed when they lose their best friend?

Or in Freddie's case, the love of his life, though he won't admit it.

I'll get him to admit it. She thought.

I'll get him to admit it if it's the last thing I do.

And she would…unless someone else decided to do it herself…

Carly shook her head, as if it would put the idea out of her head if she shook it hard enough. She tried to ignore it as she followed Spencer into the apartment…

No… she's dead Carly. She's gone. Even though you promised each other that you'd have the rest of your lives to hear him finally say it.

Carly was so deep in thought she jumped when she heard what she could have sworn was Sam, laughing sarcastically at something like she always did.

But when she looked up, no one was there.

It's funny in a weird way because Carly… for a second saw her out of the corner of her eyes from the couch, skulking around in the kitchen. Emptying her fridge. Just like any other day. She would bet her life on what she thought she had seen.

I guess I would have lost that bet…

She thought bitterly.

And a week ago, I would've bet my life on Sam living for at least another forty years, but I would have lost that one too…

After that one, Carly heard a sad sigh so clearly, it was as if she had really been right next to her for a moment.

Okay Carly…get a grip. She is DEAD. You don't want to end up in an institution, do you? For the last time she is NOT HERE. This is happening wayyy too much to be normal.

"Woah Carls. Talking to yourself? You should get that checked out."

Carly watched in a mixture of awe, confusion, and disbelief as she saw her blonde friend plop down on the couch as if nothing had happened.

Okay… so first I watch my best friend in the universe die… and now I'm seeing dead people…

God… is this a perfect situation for mental illness or what?

"No offense, but Sam… what the hell are you doing here?"

Carly said cautiously.

"What do you think? I always stay over after iCarly…"

She looked at the brunette with an amused expression, shaking her head with a wide smirk planted on her face.

"But… you've been dead for a week…"

"What planet have you been on Carls? I'm here, so I'm pretty damn sure I'm alive…"

"But- I… I saw… you know what? Never mind."

Maybe it was a bad dream? …

Carly tried to reason with herself as she tried to work this out in her head… she glanced over at the calendar on the wall near the computer…

It was the 17th of October…

The day Sam died was October 10th…

Dreams don't necessarily have to be about the day you have them… so I'll just play along with it…

Carly tried to shake the feeling that something was really off about this whole situation, but she couldn't get rid of the hunch that whether Sam was alive or not, Carly wasn't sure what it was, but something was wrong with her…

She smelled like Sam, talked like Sam, walked like Sam…

But something in her eyes was just… cold.

Okay… so there's two things I need to do…

Get Freddie to admit his feelings about Sam…

Figure out what's up with… 'Sam'…