Leah couldn't understand how this had happened.
She wasn't that girl. She wasn't the girl that fell head over heels for boys who whispered sweet words and flashed her a cocky grin. She didn't swoon over rippling muscles and she didn't gush over pretty gifts. She isn't that girl, at least not anymore.
She used to be that girl. Back when she was young and impressionable and believed in fairytales. Back when she used to stare into Sam Uley's eyes and see forever. Back when she used to dream of a cute little house with blue shutters, a flowery wedding and a few adorable kids who looked just like Sam and her. Back when she was nervous and silly and stupid and used to worry about her dad embarrassing her in front of her handsome Prince Sam.
That naive, innocent, pathetic little girl was gone. She had become bitter and twisted and hardened. She had had her heart broken one too many times and now it was beyond repair. Her handsome Prince Sam, who had been the subject of all her hopes, dreams and silly school girl fantasies had grown into a handsome strong man. He lived in a cute house with two adorable children and had a good job. He was respected and well liked and was madly in love with his soul mate. The only problem was that she wasn't his soul mate. Her heart had broken when he told her the news, when he dumped her, when her entire future collapsed all around her.
And before she could locate all the different shards of her heart she found out just who was his soul mate. It was her cousin, her best friend, her sister, the person she trusted more than anyone, well except Sam. But she had lost Sam and she had lost them. It was Emily. Emily Young. She had been betrayed by her best friend and price charming and she was all alone and she wanted to curl up in her bed and cry and cry and cry. Her heart had shattered into too many pieces to count and she knew that no matter how much duct tape she used she would never be able to tape it back together again.
After that the heart break and tragedies just kept coming. They snow balled until it was just too much. Her dad died of a heart attack, she was a werewolf, she was infertile, no one liked her, everyone fell in love, Sam and Emily got married, Sam and Emily had twins. And she, she had become the bitter harpy. She didn't know exactly when but she knew that at one point her heart had been completely destroyed and there was nothing left but a cold dark hole.
She had resigned herself, somewhere along the line, to the fact that she would never fall in love. She would never have a cute house with blue shutters, she wouldn't get a flowery wedding or a bunch of adorable kids and even in the long forgotten wisps of her dreams they didn't look like Sam. And her dad, her dad would never embarrass her.
And she was right, in a fashion. She never got a cute house with blue shutters. Her house didn't have any shutters because "...they were a stupid waste of money that could be spent on other things, like beer." She never had a flowery wedding, instead getting married in her mother's back yard with the barbeque grilling and the wind in her hair. She did get two children, but they caused so many problems she sometimes wondered why she had. And they didn't look anything like Sam. Not one bit.
She was still the bitter harpy. She was still sarcastic and still rolled her eyes. She still teased and made fun of the other guys but it was different. She smiled and laughed. She had friends and she was loved. She belonged somewhere and she had discovered that her heart hadn't been destroyed; it had just hidden itself away and had been waiting for the right moment to come out.
She wasn't supposed to get married and have a family; it was written in the stars. She was destined to be alone and bitter forever. But somehow, by some twist of fate she had defied destiny. It was by no means perfect but she loved it even more because of its imperfections. Her life was screwy and topsy turvy. It was a complete and utter mess and she had never been happier.
Her only regret was that her dad wasn't there to see her rise from the ashes and make something of her life. She could still remember with perfect clarity the moment that had changed her life forever. It wasn't even a moment but more of a realization. A realisation that had broken down ever wall and defied every law, the realization that had changed everything.
Leah's fairytale had never happened. And she was glad because if it had, she never would have realised that she loved Jacob Black so much more than she had ever loved Sam Uley.