(A/N) Hey! Ok I know I said Id do this a while ago but...life. So here is the 1st chapter! I hope you enjoy!

Word: Abrupt

Summery: All of Beca's abrupt hits to Jesse.

RATING:T

JPOV

I didn't know what to do when it 1st happened. It was like a splash of cold water on what I thought was a perfectly good, slow, but progressing relationship.

It was today, about a month after meeting, I just called one of my original greetings, and expected her to throw a comment back like always.

"Hey short stack." I said and did not expect to meet her glare, as she glanced up at me with a slight shake of her head, before she brought the headphones that were around her neck up to cover her ears. My eyebrows knit together as she struggled to lift a full crate, and headed for the stairs.

"Hey, I can help you with that." I say uselessly as I come up next to her, reaching for the crate, giving a soft smile since I know she didn't hear me. She barley glances at me as she pulls the crate away and climbs up the stairs.

"I don't need your help." she says harshly, as she takes the last step. Alrighty then, that wasn't pleasant. I decide to just take a hint and leave her be as I grab my own crate, moving it to a cart to start stacking. I nurse the slap as I do so, my brain going wild as to what caused the flip in progression.

"Beca…Is everything OK?" I ask as we leave the station 5 hours later. The shift had been the most boring yet, with her only coming to the ground floor 3 times to grab another crate, no words what so ever.

"Can you just leave me alone?" She says that glare in place and I give her a sad look, telling her I just want to help.

"I told you. I don't need anyone's help" she's about to put her headphones on again but I speak 1st.

"Everyone needs help at some point" I say and she gives me a calculated look, before it turns thoughtful then angry as she puts her headphones on and storms towards her dorm.

The second time was worse, painful even, like a hard punch to the gut, or a kick to the shin. I might have sort of deserved it, but I was just trying to read her, and she leaned in! Maybe only a centimeter but she leaned in before she changed her mind. She wanted to kiss me, I swear.

It was 3 weeks later; she invited me over to listen to her music. OK so maybe I just showed up, I had walked her to her dorm a couple of times, so it's not like I followed her, I'm not a stalker and she had said she would let me listen to one of her mixes, just not when or where.

After auditions and initiation night 3 days after the flip, she seemed fine. Back to her usual self if not a little stressed. But are usual sarcastic and mildly inappropriate banter was back, and I liked it. Of course I had to ruin it.

She took my unexpected appearance in stride though, her cheerful (creepy) roommate, Kimmy Jin wasn't there, luckily and she seemed her regular sarcastic self. I loved her mix and told her so, but then I had to bring up the movie, and I turn off the light, even though she made her disapproval known. I didn't plan to try to kiss her, really! I did those things because she needed to see the end of the movie! And you can't watch a movie with the light on! It's just not OK!

She was warm where her arm rested against mine, her small bed sort of forcing the contact, but I wasn't complaining. We joked, and everything was OK, until I finally lost the battle of not looking at her. Her blue eyes were amazingly illuminated in the light from the computer screen, and I was instantly lost in her face as I took in all the details close up for the 1st time.

My eyes finally landed on her lips after she looked back at me and I was leaning, then she was leaning. But then she wasn't. She sat up, pausing the movie and saying something. My heart fell to my stomach as I looked down and laughed at my idiocy. Kimmy Jim chose then to interrupt.

"The white girls back" she awkwardly said and Beca looked at her, and then looked at me. This was the second, the abrupt punch her look caused. The pity.

"And I'm out." I said, closing my computer, and picking up my bag off the ground. Kimmy Jin and her friends just stand there awkwardly. I'm hoping to revive the easy atmosphere, hoping this wont screw up the walls of hers I had broke down during the previous month and a half.

"Always a pleasure Kimmy Jin." I said, and then looked back to Beca, hoping she'd say something. But she just looked down, causing the pain to worsen. I sighed in defeat again, before leaving the dorm and walking in a haze towards my own.

The third time was so bad, like a kick to the balls; a horrible reality check, as I stood outside the police station, watching her argue with her dad. I know it was not a good idea to call her dad but I didn't have an option, I had no way back to Barden and no money.

Everything was great, a little backwards with Beca coming to rescue me from the crazy tone hanger, and hurting herself. Then Fat Amy, Jesus that girl needs help! What sane woman wants to shove a sharp thing up a grown mans ass?

"Thanks for bailing me out." she said, and I causally told her I didn't, not expecting a problem, but then she was in my face and I was defending myself, for helping her?

"I don't need your help, you're not my boyfriend!" she had said, after I let her know I was only trying to help. Whack! Breathing had become hard but I hid it as she turned, walking towards her father. I mumbled a hurt 'got it' because I did, as I followed her, unashamedly listening to the conversation.

She never really mentioned her dad, except that he worked at the school, so how was I suppose to know he was going to flip out? Wait, what was that about LA? She was leaving? That was part of the kick; Beca had become a big part of my life over the last 5 months, it was strange thinking she wouldn't be there anymore

Beca's face, she looked so…broken. And she blamed me; I know it wasn't my entire fault, more her dad being a dick, the Bella's abandoning her. But the fact that, in her mind it was my fault…God it hurt. The awkward 45 minute car ride back to Barden was even worse; she had climbed into the back seat, giving me the option of sitting next to her when she's pissed, which I knew could result in actual physical abuse. Or sitting next to her dad…I opened the back door.

It was completely silent, the first 20 minutes, as I glanced at her every now and then, but I guess it was more than I thought, because maybe the 30th time doing it, I catch her glare.

"I'm sorry." I mouth and I swore I saw something, but she turned away, looking out the window, until we got to Barden.

The fourth and final time, god it's horrible. It's the final blow, the kill shot, the end of the world as I know it. As cliché as all those sound, that's how I feel. Brokenhearted. The worst part is that it doesn't fade away like the others.

She had taken a leap, changing the Bella's set on stage and I was heading down back stage to congratulate her, tell her it was great. I overheard Aubrey's comment, and just had to jump in; I didn't want people to get the wrong idea. I know about the oath and that It would kill Beca if she lost these girls, though she wouldn't admit it.

But then she says she doesn't need me, so why am I here? I was only trying to back her up and yet again I got shot for it. Ok, a bit of an exaggeration, but her words still echoed in my head…I don't need your help…just back off…

I'm slapped on the back as Benji comes back in and I give him a hopeful look since he had ran after Beca, though I don't know how I came to this knowledge, but he shakes his head and I sigh.

"I don't get it…I was trying to help." I say in a strangled confused voice, and he nods, saying that Beca's a tough girl, that she won't accept help easily. I already knew this, but I've tried, and it felt like I was getting there, like she was letting me in.

"Jesse, you have to perform in a minute…I know you're not in the right mind set, but you have to think of your team man. They need you." He said to me, and I sighed, trying to push Beca out of my head for the next 4 minutes so I could get through our set.

"Hey Jess…for what its worth…I'm pretty sure she likes you, she just doesn't know how to show it. She's scared." a soft voice comes from next to me as I look up to see the red head with tears in her eyes.

I smile and nod to Chloe, patting her shoulder in an attempt at comfort t she returns it before I leave, reaching the guys next to the stage, focusing on the set only. I had too. I was done with her, for now at least, I have spent the last 7 months trying to get her to let me in, but all she did was shut me out. I couldn't stand the hurt anymore. Another blow would kill me.

The next few months prove me wrong, but I try to match Beca in stubbornness. I can't just let her in if she won't do the same. Trust is a two way street, and I learned I had to be more picky on who's street I went on. Fuck, I need to stop with these ridiculous metaphors. If she isn't going to trust me I won't trust her. There, simple and to the point.

But it didn't stop the pain, sitting at the dinner table as my siblings and parents talk during spring break, I couldn't focus on anything. Then came the messages, little apology's sometimes, one drunk dial, then just random things, like the stuff we would of probably of talked about at the station as we worked, had we still been on speaking terms.

But I stayed strong and deleted every single message. Well except the drunken dial, I'm sorry but I couldn't delete Beca saying she loved me…I'm pretty sure she doesn't remember it, but I couldn't get rid of the slurred recording, it only caused more pain really, because I knew she could. Love me, that is. But I also knew that she wasn't the type of person to serenade me in front of thousands of people.

She even came to my dorm, apologizing for yelling at me. Seriously? She's completely oblivious, and it just adds to the constant pain she's put on me, causing me to lash out maybe a little too much, but I know it's the right things to do, weather it makes since or not. I close the door in her face, feeling a small since of victory as I feel that maybe she got some of the pain this time. Followed by guilt of course.

Time continued, I hear about the Bella's getting back into the finals, and hear Beca asking for a few days during finals week off from Luke, which means she must have made up with the Bella's and will be performing. This means she'll probably kick our asses, since there's no way she went back to the group without some changes being made.

I happily enlist Benji as Bumpers replacement when Bumper flakes on us, which isn't completely surprising. My friends happiness helps a bit but then just sort of becomes annoying, but all of us are in 5 hour rehearsals each for the 5 days before we get on the place, since we have to re-choreograph most of the set, putting Benji's favorite song in it for him, but it works out and its good and I think we just might have a chance.

"Swag!" We do our usual chant 30 seconds before we have to go on, at Lincoln Center and just before the announcer calls for us, I hear a soft 'hey' from beside me.

"Hey" I say to Beca, the competition momentarily forgotten, I hate that she still has this effect on me, even after 2 months of nothing, but deep down I know that It means something a lot bigger.

"Good luck" she says, an out of character shy smile on her face.

"Thanks…You too" I say, trying to not be a guy and check her out. The Bella's new outfits were noticed by all of the trebles earlier today during dress rehearsals.

Were called and I get into place, ready to enter at the right time. I put the whole Beca argument out of my mind, focusing on just her. Pretending for a few minutes that she's mine, and everything is alright. By the reaction of the audience, I guess it worked because it's loud as Benji hugs me excitedly and we exit stage left, heading around through the lobby and too our seats, as the Bella's take their place on stage.

The Pitch Pipe blows but it's not in Aubrey's hand…I look to Chloe but no…then Beca's counting and I can't help the small proud smile. Then I sigh. There's no way we're going to win, of course I already thought that but I know that we nailed that performance, and thought there was a chance until I saw that Beca was in charge…we're dead.

"Seems like everybody's got a price…" Aubrey starts after all the girls start a perfect pitch, Chloe starts then Lily, shit who knew the girl could beat box. Damn. There even better and I put my head in my hands as I accept defeat. Lost the girl, lost the competition… life sucks.

"Hey, Hey, Hey, Hey…" comes over the speakers, that beautiful strong alto hitting me hard. But it's not a painful punch…more like a curious nudge. She starts singing as she does the chorography, her eyes finding me in the audience, which I know is hard considering stage lights are bright as fuck.

"Don't you, forget about me" she sings and I can't help the smile as I look around the crowd. No fucking way! Beca Mitchell is serenading me…at the ICCA's… with Simple Minds…I can't believe it. I laugh and mumble an 'oh my god' as I remember the irony of my thought all those weeks ago.

"When you walk on by…Will you call my name?" she sings for the third time, and I pretend to begrudgingly raise my 1st but then she's doing it back and I laugh as she continues the song, hitting it out of the park like expected and making acapella history.

"Let's do it tonight!" They say and pose as the entire theater erupts, not one person is sitting or standing still as they cheer for the hugging group of girls on stage.

The announcer comes out complimenting them as they exit stage left but just come right down into the house, heading for the row behind us, Beca leading. I turn in my seat, our eyes staying connected with crazy smiles as she approaches me.

"Told you. Endings are the best part." I tell her with a smile, and she calls me a weirdo before her hands are in on my neck, pulling me down and our lips touch and the pain…disappears. Like it never was. I still have the dull memory of sitting in my dorm watching sad movies and romcoms and clutching my chest as tell the guy that just got rejected that I know how he feels.

But it's better now. She proved she cares, she put so much work into it all and now she's kissing me and how can a guy like me, so intent on a happy ending, deny the one she's handing to me?

"I'm so sorry." She whispers a minute later as we pull away from the kiss, I just shake my head as I lift her to bring her to my row of seats, setting her in my lap. My arms haven't moved from around her since she pulled me to her and I don't intend to change that any time soon.

"I shouldn't have pushed you away. I…guess I'm just afraid of getting hurt? But it was…wrong." she says, looking into my eyes and I can't help the smile.

"I'd never hurt you Beca" I whispered and her awkwardly bitten lip told me different…and I knew I had.

"I'm sorry" I tell her and she sighs as she smiles softly "I knew you were worth fighting for…I know you are. I shouldn't have given up on you…Don't think I really did." I say and she smiles again.

"Good. Enough sappy apologizing. More kissing." she says with a smirk and I lean in with a laugh as I do as I'm told, no complaints.

She was this abrupt, hard exterior, badass bitch; with tall, iron walls, but I had set my mission to bring them down, and though there not all gone, the important ones are and she let me in. I couldn't have been happier.