Saggy the Comgog: The Delighted Sacquel
By: Patrick Ass Smore, Dragqueen Qard, and Reimoo Sakurai
Special Thanks to Katstain-Kazoo McDonalds
DISCLAIMER: hey kevin stop putting reviews on my motherfucking fanfictions ur opinion is wrong and u should stop before its too late u have been warned and if u dont stop i will not hesitate to get my dad and he'll make u fell bad
iRON sEAFOOD
Chapter John the Baptist: Ms. Frizlays maymays
So Sagnic was just fucking rivetted and hes like "HOLY SHIT FAST YEAH?" becuz he had been happy to see that mers Frizbald was still livly as a DS Lite yeah? SHUT THE FUCK UP KEVIN and so tehn sanic was like "WOAHAOHAOAHOAH FAST WAY FAST COOL" and they went to heaven. In heaven, hedgehog and frizzle were happy cuz they went too fast and they then fuzed with goku. this created a deus ex machina and sora and roxion and axelchu come from disneyland with their love muscles out and they're german salmi legs were fucking pulsating. they had come from a party at the caserole of oblivion and they were orgying so hard and they were sticking blue salty popsicle inside theyre weiner. axel was like "STICK IT IN ME ROXIAION maybe?" *laugh track* and then roshion was like "OKAY AXEL BURN BABY BURN" axel blushed slightly as roxion stuck the tent pole sized non-magenta cyan popsickle into his Alamaba Black Snake. "IM SO FLATTERED" SAID the firey ginger. sora wasnt paert of organization 16, so he was finding his way becuz he got a anew job today thank god hes on his own for the first time. he's 16, life is fast, like sonic, growing up too last, gott amke the good times fast. sora had AIDS. so he think this way to be happy. without this comfort, roxion could not exist.
Chapter Brew: the filler episode
After the DISNEy's were done FUCKLING they started to fuze I think. They made Soraxelion and the wepon they have was a giant sitar because WHY THE fuck NOT YEAH YEAH YOU FUCKING ROCK THAT SITAR. soraceliaon also was astroboy btw yaeh don't ask its my headcannon. Anyway anway he (soraxelion) stuck that sitaer up hedgezzleku-kun asshole and they went "YEE" (author note: get it? its a joke from yeah B)) So after all that, hedgezzleku was hurt badly, then they died and went to haven, which they were so?/ whatever whatever kid fucking shut up kevin i don't give a SHIT okay? oh ghod what the fuck do i do now i don't actually know where to go from here i've went to o far here I know.
Chapter YEE: Chala Enchalada Echidna
anyway so yeah Soraxelchu was like "i'm done" and went to earth then. they realized, sora had AIDS, and so the blood contact with aids gave them all aids and they thbejhn had to find a cure. the only way to do this was to get all the Drugging Balls and wish for aids-away creme. soraxelion went on a quest to find all the druggin balls to cure their aids and to destroy the entire world, and to do that they had to get those drug balls. they went to the nearest city: echinda place port. hedgezzleku-kun was in heaven, wondering what to due because they are dead. Because they aero furzed with Saggy, they could run really fast. so they ran down snake DICKS way and got to end in 0.12308:01 PM 4/26/201564132054 secibds. when they got there they went to the earth and looked for bikino libido but on the way ran across echidna land 3d world. they found that it was DESTROYED SHIT OH FUCK (authors note: i accidentally scared myself that good huh yeah?) space They were ambassadored to find sorakshionlion was the prepret8or they destoryed it with a single firaga wait no. no its without the c each time atleast you got the u i got that one in fifith grade AKKIRE fuck i'm typing whoops
That last para was audo cockrekt sorry.
anyway snake eater road was way back, so they couldn't just kidnap people out if heaven ouch sorry guys (sorry guys)) soraxelchu wanted to get a thing that could find druggin blallz so they killed people for it and so did Hedgehizzlekuchuwakaalibabawikitikiheehahakitikibabaakutikiwaheewah-OOHKA-CHEEKA-ALOHA (Stitch! the anime now on DVD sorry i weas payed ) **laugh trackkkkkkkk fuckkkk* anyway thats when they stopped and went to find them
Chapter My Weinter is Sore: I have DILDOS on my table at the time of this stories industrialation.
The first drughin bsll was found then fuck it there all found there
after the good guy hedgezzlekun found none, that left axelionessorra with all of them. that means they kured aids and aslo wished for a lot of power and got it. Before the fight, they tried summoning their persona but that didn't work so they shot themselves in the head and they ascended to heaven to trick sanichrizzle. They charged up their CEASELESS ANAL DISCHARGE AND FIRED IT STRAIGHT FOR EARTH. so then, hedgey-fries began to speaketh:
"Sheeple of Earth, listen carefully! As you know, some very strange events have been taking place recently. Your entire planet was destroyed at the hands of Shrekornagiclimerizzle in the last canon installment of this series (Kevin, your RIP OFF FANFIC IS NOT! CANNON!). Many of you are doubting if all of this actually happened, but I can assure you that this is not a dream. Unfortunately, Soraxelion is still alive and the Earth is in great danger. A small group of warriors has taken up the fight on your behalf. However, the battle has been extremely difficult and we can't win it by ourselves! That is why I'm speaking to you right now, to ask for your help. If all of you would raise your hands up to the sky and offer a portion of your energy, we could use it to defeat Soraxelion once and for all! No more being slaughtered like sacrificial lambs! Consider this your first, small stride to becoming a warrior race! Now, let's begin! Raise your hands up! Now!"
All the sheeple (c) raised their hands and they gave their energy to Hedge. Hedge charged their attack as the anal discharge came closer. OH SHIT THE SHEEPLE GAVE TOO MUCH EVERGY TO HIM SHIT SHIT THEY'RE ALL DEAD OH FUCK anyway. The attack also absorbed teh druggin balls, the claus emerals Hedge fired his Margarita's Specialty Appetizer Spirit Bomb at the earth to move the earth out of the way of the anal discharge. the anal discharge instead hit planet Hocotate and killed all the pikmin. Soraxelion was mad now. But then, before he could fire another anal discharge, Hedge shot himself in the face and went to the tip of heaven and absorbed Kingdom hearts and the x blade and took a little energy from the entire universe appeared in their hand. They pointed it at Soracelxion and fire it and super kai-oh-kenny anal discharge and the Kingdom Sharts spirit bamboo bamboozle collided and. next para LAN party
ttthe margarita was too much for Soraxelionel, and he was killed. Then, Super Mega ultra superstar ultra Hedge used his Over the Hedge for GameCube attack to bring all people of Earth back to wellness.
But Skeletor killed the universe and a new one was founded by Captain Falcon, created by a single Falcon Punch.
Don't you see, dear reader?
Life isn't just about passing on your memes. We can leave behind much more than just fanfiction. Through speech, music, literature and movies... what we've seen, heard, felt... anger, joy and sorrow... these are the things I will pass on. That's what I live for. We need to pass the torch, and let our children read our messy and sad fanfictions by its light. We have all the magic of the digital age to do that with. The human race will probably come to an end some time, and new species may rule over this planet. Earth may not be forever, but we still have the responsibility to leave what traces of life we can. Building the future and keeping the dead memes dead are one and the same thing. And we can, some day, in the far future, have a world without memes.
Kevin, I forgive you.