Disclaimer: Discworld and all its characters belong to the wonderful Terry Pratchett.
A/N: Just a little idea I had. Probably set just before Fifth Elephant. Enjoy.
'My Lord, a new message has arrived from our ambassador in Istanzia.' Drumknott sighed, 'He's on his way home. They've insisted that our embassy leave. They continue to insult Ankh-Morpork and threaten forceful incursions into Morporkian territory. And their ambassador says that they will refuse to negotiate further until we make at least some concessions.'
'Politics seems to have failed, Drumknott. Regrettably, it does sound as if we may be obliged to continue by more drastic means. What's the City's opinion?'
'The nobles and the Guilds are almost unanimous in the view that the time for a peaceful solution is over.'
'They are right, Drumknott.'
'You're going to declare war, my Lord?'
'No, Drumknott: they may wish I had. I am going to declare Vimes.'