Whispered voices
Disclaimer- I don't own naruto and this goes for the whole story that is all.
Its not that it is so difficult to override any moment in my life. Tragedy, pain, drama, and then tragedy once more. Past occurrences in my life at such an early age. Only on mantra keeping me going, telling me to not give up on life. That there was something better was up ahead if only I was willing to endure long enough to reach out and grasp it.
Keep walking...
I knew I always would no matter how much life ground me down. I could never give up. To give up would be to admit that I did not have a future waiting beyond my sights. That all I had gone through was some sort of sick twisted test, that I had somehow failed. I would always reach my rewards, I would endure. I firmly believed that somewhere it was waiting for me.
I just didn't know what IT was yet.
Perhaps what I have seen has altered me. The loss of innocence can have a butterfly effect on anyone. The wise say power is knowledge, the strong say fear is to understand change, the weak crawl forward and become the strong and wise. Who I'm I?
There is no one that doesn't have a wounded soul. If there was such a person in existence, they would be barren of emotion. I'm I nothing but a person of many shadows? Weather right or wrong is only a choice of opinion. Sometimes it is better to be naive, than fall into becoming an empty spirit.
There is always that whisper at the back of the head. It tells us to not trust yet we do not listen to the winds. This is only a story of many perspectives. I am starting to slip; the voice of courage that keeps me strong was starting to affect my voice of reasoning. But I am splitting the good and bad. Ageing is unavoidable but growing up is optional. I can't afford to fail, I MUST stay strong.
Still...
That weight on my shoulders is getting heavier as it brightens. Its like the sun, I glow with knowledge, warmed, and faith. Yet the sun is to close to me, it's burning me alive. But still I must be light for others to see. Smiling yet confusing people.
One must know the ends, and where it begins. The confusion of truth and lies. It manifests and grows in this illusion I see. Move or you will fall...keep moving...
There is black and white and together they make a variety of grays'. That's where reality is blurred. We are as one absolute knowledge, in life and death situations. WE MUST KNOW WHO WE ARE. When grays blur people run. To where? How? Why? It is all connected to one primary instinct. Darkest hours are always just before the sun starts to shine. This is my story. Or rather a brief glimpse into my story. Still moving forward ,always, and forever more.
I was running faster than I thought I had before. Images blurred past me in colors, the clank of spray paint cans against walls echoed in this dark ally way. My laughter followed me as I ran away from cop sirens. Laughter also accompanied by my two best friends in this universe. This wasn't the best of neighbor hoods to live in. But if you knew the right people you would get home ok. Hinata my sister in all but blood yelled out to me. We were still running speedily down the streets, were we started to slow and then we ducked and took refuge in a back way ally where the cops.
Or as we like to call em' the sirens wouldn't catch sight of us. We were breathing heavily slouching slightly trying to catch our breaths. Hinata my older sister in all but blood wheezed a little and then took a deep breath and started to talk. "Think they saw us? Or did we lose em' before they got a glance?" Ino my other older sister in everything but blood turned to Hinata, "we lost em' bubbles." I took a quick glance towards the street lights in our neighbor hood, "It's getting bout time for the gangs to be comin', we should head home blossom or we might wake up in a hospital." Me, Ino, and Hinata moved out onto the streets again and trudged our way home. I and my two friends were big fans of the power puff girls when we were smaller. We each were attracted to each other to make friends in the first place because we all had a big obsession with the power puffs.
Ino was the oldest and probably the most hardened out of us for living on the streets. She'd seen to many things and done too many things for her not to be that way. Luckily she was never cold towards me and Hinata. Hinata was the second oldest and probably the most laid back out of all of us. She goofed around to much sometimes but she was really good looking and attracted a lot of people towards her with her warm smile. She could be a model if she wanted to; she'd even been offered an acting job by some sponsor because of her good looks. She had turned them all down because she didn't want to get mixed up in to much drama. I don't know what she was thinking; she could have had a free ride out of this rotten place.
I, well, my name is Sakura and I'm named after the cherry trees. I'm not much of a looker; I'm tomboyish and ware really baggy pants and really tight shirts. Anyway. Like I was saying. I and my two sisters loved the idea of supper powered teenage girls fighting off evil. I was six when we met so sue me; I was still a child that saw the world in black and white. But because of our obsession, Hinata Ino and me all had the idea to call on another by the the names of the power puffs. Ino was blossom, Hinata was bubbles, and I was buttercup. We each liked our names and we even acted like the characters from the cartoon. Ino was the intelligent one but was hard working, Hinata was the cute one, and I was the tomboyish one. Blossom, bubbles, and buttercup. We were sisters and we stuck together, even if Ino didn't get along with me like I did with Hinata.
The street lights flickered briefly as we passed. The streets were dirty and the sidewalks were old. The houses that we passed ranged from well kept to down right horror movie looking. "Yo buttercup can we all crash at your place tonight since your moms probably going to be out drinking today?" Ino interrupted, "Yeah buttercup, me and bubbles want to stay the night at your house because bubble's dad is probably drop death drunk, you know he beats bubbles when he's like that." I looked away as she said the word 'beats'. Bubbles although good looking was always scared like a starving ally cat that had been hurt to many times to count. She was cautious and jumped when anybody but I and Ino touched her. Bubble's dad was almost always drunk. He was a violent drunk that hit bubbles around when he wanted to. Her mom had past away at a very early age, at that age her father had started to drink and well you know the rest. Because of that Ino was always looking after the bruises Hinata got. Hinata practically never went home. She always crashed at my place or at blossoms. She only went for spare cloths and that is only once in a while because we lent her our own cloths. We were very protective of her; even though I was younger I was the better fighter between me and her. Rule number one on the streets was fight or die; it was the simple rule of the jungle. Survival of the fittest and all.
My mother was never at home. She worked all day and spent nights partying with her friends. My father didn't want to settle down and take responsibilities for me so he just up and left. I never knew him nor do I want to ever meet him. I knew the moment we would meet I would punch his face in, and make sure he bleeds to death in a horrible, painful manner. Ino was an orphan from the start. She was 18 now so she had her own apartment. I tended to live their with bubbles when we couldn't crash at my place, be it because my mom had a head ache and wanted us out on the few days, or if she just didn't like me I wasn't sure. Blossom was more of my caretaker than my own blood mother. I was perfectly fine with that as long as she gave me money so that I could support myself. I was only 14 after all, so I couldn't get a job. And I sure as fire wouldn't sell drugs like half the kids my age did for extra paper. We were the misfits and weirdoes of even the classic outsider.
I was surprised when I opened the door to see my mom in her pj's watching one of her reality TV shows. I could tell my other two sisters where surprised as well. "I thought you were ganna' go with your friends to the club downtown today?" I asked bewildered. She looked at me coldly for a second and then turned to my two friends and spoke "Ino, Hinata I'm afraid you can't be here today." I looked back into the house awkwardly. "Its ok mom I'll just crash at blossoms house today then, let me go get my pj's and some snacks." I stopped dead in my tracks when I heard my moms' voice ring out towards me. I looked towards the couch again where my mom was lying around with the TV in front of her. "You can't go out today Sakura." I looked at her like she had just grown a second head. She AlWAYS let me go out. In her eyes it would be more silence for her to be in. "Why not?" She gave me 'the look', "because I'm your mother and I need to talk to you." The look in her eyes where dead serious, something bad had happened I realized. Taking my eyes off my mom for a sec. I looked towards were my sisters where and saw them looking at me with concern. I nodded my head and they got the message because they just turned away from me and locked the door behind me with a click.
Walking into my house I felt vaguely like I was walking towards my death sentence. I sat on the couch my mom was on and just stared at her. The awkward silence that engulfed us was almost suffocating me. Just when I thought I was going to end up in an asylum she started to speak. "We are moving." With that sentence said, I felt like my world was crashing down on me. Everything I thought was stable in my life turned upside down with three words. I felt like a kicked puppy, one that wanted to bawl her eyes out and run. I realized in this moment that it was a shade of grey. A very unforgiving shade of grey. My mother locked eyes with me; maybe I was right this was a death sentence. Bubbles and blossom were my two pillars of support in life. Had I not had them, then I would be drowned by now with the life I've held. I didn't want to move, but what choice did I have? I whispered weakly towards my mom. No. Not my mother, this woman... Was taking me away from my family, my real family. This stranger before my eyes was pulling the ground from under my feet. Even if I hated every second of the slums, hiding from the sirens, and getting back talked to by my school's teachers.
I loved the fun and danger, and the security my sisters would offer. She couldn't take me away from all this could she? "Sakura, I know you're angry at this but you need to suck it up and move on. I am getting a raise and moved to another department in the dealer ship I work at. We can have a better house and everything Sakura. Please, listen, you'll make new friends and adjust. We're moving to Georgia the next state over. Since were in Florida we can have a road trip, what do you say?" I felt like I had been slapped. Sure I would be nice to live in a better neighbor hood. Still I would be alone and insecure, and no where was home without Hinata and Ino by my side.
And this person, Vivi, my mother's name was going to taking me away. Defeated I looked at my mother brokenly. She smiled, which gave me a strong urge to slap her and run, far away and never look back. "When do we start packing?" "In a week we leave, so we start packing tomorrow." Sighing I walked away towards the white passage hallway leading me to my room. I turned and glanced back towards Vivi. She was engrossed in her shows. I turned once again and in that same movement I closed my door softly. Even though I was a tomboy I loved ballet. Of course with Vivi never being home and not having enough money to give me classes….. Going professional was close to impossible, and I recognized that.
I crawled into my bed wanting to rest, and since it was summer vacation to sleep in also. Besides, when I wake up tomorrow Vivi won't be here. Sighing for the second time that day I fell victim to my soft and warm pillows. The sheets hulled over my tired body. Sleep, the lullaby my bed sang was beautiful. Soon everything went blank, and I dreamed of dancing upon a stage gracefully as everyone watched me. Some how I new that a new day would come and Wisk me away, so that I could make of my dreams a reality and of my reality my long forgotten nightmare. One day I knew it would happen… One day for sure…
BANG, BANG, BANG. I heard someone bounding away at my window. I looked over to the clock; it was already 11 in the morning. "Butter! Butter open the door its blossom and bubbles!" I heard someone yell. My mind was still to foggy with sleep to register that it was my sister's trying to break my window with their knocking. Then like a brick was thrown into my head it hit me. "Oh my god. How am I supposed to tell them that I'm moving?" I crawled out of my bed-sheets and hurried towards my door, almost tripping over my own feet because of how quickly I was going. Add the fact that I had just woken up, and you get a very groggy Sakura. Going through my white colored house quickly I pulled the door open to reveal blossom and bubbles almost seething on my front porch glaring at me. "Do you have any idea how worried you had us!" bubbles yelled at me. "You could have at least called my cell to tell me what the heck happened yesterday!" blossom screeched at me.
"All right, all right, sheesh' don't bite my head off." They stood their unwaveringly staring at me. Both eyes demanding an explanation. Some part of me was happy that they cared about me so much, but the other was reminding me that these where the people that I had to leave behind. Glancing at them sullenly I ushered them inside to sit on my black couch to talk. This was probably going to be the hardest thing in the world to do in my lifetime. Staring, I decided that I might as well shoot it to them now instead of beating around the bush. "Vivi." I spat the name out like it was venom. "Has decided that we are to move." bubbles looked at my and started to burst out laughing. "Butter I never knew you were such a joker." Bubbles stated. Bubbles was rolling on the floor laughing. I honestly didn't see the funny in this. All of a sudden bubbles looked at me pleadingly. "Hey" she whispered slowly and weakly, almost afraid to hear the answer. "Why aren't you laughing?" She turned to blossom and clung to her arm looking at her, frightened like a cornered animal. She noticed the sad look that was displayed on blossoms face; she hadn't said a word since bubbles burst out laughing. "Hey blossom, butter is just kidding...right?" at this point Hinata had started to tear up in the eyes. "Right?" she yelled desperately, peering back and forth from me to blossom. I looked away. I couldn't say anything or do anything to help the situation. So I stayed quiet as bubbles cried into blossoms shirt.
"When are you leaving" asked blossom. I noticed that she sounded almost detached. Her voice and eyes had a far, far away look to them. Glassy and betrayed. "I leave in a week. I start packing up today." "I see." was blossoms only response. The silence that was instilled was heavy and awkward as bubbles started to sniffle. Showing that she was calming down to some degree. Her tear stained face turned towards me. Blood shot eyes locking onto mine. She smiled a small sad smile. That's what I admired about bubbles the most. She always bounced back. I think it had something to do with her father being a drunken abuser all the time. "Can we help out the packing so that you have a little extra time to be together and say good bye?" Bubbles said. I smiled back slowly, almost painfully. "Sure bubbles anytime." As if a switch had been turned, me and bubbles both looked towards blossom asking for silent permission. She sighed. Her eyes returning to the present. "Sure buttercup well all help out to. Besides what are friends for eh'?" Yup this was the hardest thing in my life I had ever done. "Common then lets go to the garage to get the boxes out, the mover's van should be here in the next couple of days." Blossom turned towards us "Buttercup, bubbles, I think we should pack up all the clothing first and shoes and trinkets first, sound straight with you two?" It was a nice idea really. The only thing that I was going to pack first was the things in my own room. I would rather be caught dead than invade the room that was Vivi's. Plus with my girls helping out maybe we could finish early and just hang out, give me a chance to gain my last few memories with them both.
Memories I would surely as is the life that breeds through me, will never be forgotten. I smile minutely towards my two pillars of strength. "Sure sounds great, but we still need to get the boxes out first." We all nodded and passed the white hallway that was so familiar to all three of us and we halted in front of a peach door. That specific door was the only thing in between me and the boxes for packing. It hit me that all of this was strangely serene in its own twisted way. Maybe in some other alternate life I wasn't mentally scarred to the point were leaving behind friends, wouldn't crumble my heart to such an extent that it felt like my heart was slowly smoldering in a deep lake.
Alas it is all just, just wishful thinking upon my mind. Brought back to the present, I realized that bubbles and blossom were looking at me. Their eyes screamed 'concern' written in them. I was standing in front of the door grasping onto the doorknob shaking. "Sorry guys I guess this is all just weird." Blossom and bubbles share a look. Almost sending a message between them wordlessly. "Sure Butter, just please…. Please try to live and be strong." This sentence muttered by blossom seemingly out at random was a bit haunting. But I had to be stronger, because if I wasn't strong for me, I had to be for them. I smiled a soft smile towards them both and pressed on entering the garage. Turing on the light I took in the image of all the boxes piled up one after another. We all grabbed a few and made our way back to my room. I breathed a deep o-so-slightly relaxing breath.
"Man today is such an emotional roller costar isn't it?" I hear a chuckle and a giggle behind me. I sighed, and walked into my closet grabbing as much clothes as I could in my small hands, and turned and dumped them all onto my bed. Bubbles followed my example and grabbed as much clothing as she could and through them on my carpet near my door. While blossom busied herself folding the cloths and placing them neatly into the awaiting boxes. The quiet stretched on, not awkward but not comfortable. More like heavily depressed, in other wards the minutes passed slowly, almost giving the illusion that the minutes where hours. That's exactly what drowned on till it hit nine at night and most of my room was bare except my bed and the clothing I would require for the rest of the week, a brush, and a towel. Since there was nothing out to pack anymore in my room there was nothing that was in the way of talking.
"Why don't you crash at my place tonight?" I asked out of now are. I didn't want to be alone especially now of all times. I knew that blossom and bubbles had no clothes and it was really dangerous at this time of night to go out. Not to talk about that if bubbles went home now she would go inside her house and come out black and blue with bruises. I still couldn't find myself to care though. We could work around these obstacles. I heard blossom sigh next to me the gears in her head weighing the pros and the cons. She seemed to come to the conclusion that it could cost us, but I wouldn't be here in only a week's time so we would go along with it. "Hay bubbles", Blossom called out, "you don't have to go home you can just borrow some clothes from me. We can all head towards my apartment and grab some snacks to munch on also okay?" Bubbles was oozing relief at not having to go home and I smiled. Bouncing atop my bed I yelled "Whoop sleep over!" Ignoring the fact that sleep over's were so often with all three of us it wasn't exciting anymore, I couldn't help myself. I would really miss the nights where I could be with my sisters. That infuriating dull ache overcame me once more and I stopped bouncing on my bed, just as bubbles and blossom disappeared behind my room's door.
A couple moments later I heard the front door close and I new they were gone. I would forever regret the choice i had made to have a sleep over that night. Because after I heard the door close, in the distance I heard guns go off. Each sound of a bullet being shot echoed slowly in my ears. Time slurred and blurred all in one. Time flashed before my eyes. A mantra growing slowly in volume echoes, protect, live, survive. Their was no light, but my mind was to preoccupied to notice that I had gone momentarily blinded. There was no heat, only a blast of numbness. In the time span of a second hope had disappeared, but there was no fear to break. Shatter…. And I broke, my heart beat pounded in my chest like a trapped animal trying futile attempts to brake free. I ran. Faster than I even thought was possible for a human. I blasted out my house door and onto the streets. This was just another crack in my heart and I would move on I knew. But too much things had gone on in just three days and my mind was severely damaged because of it. Then I saw, and I wished for once that I was a blind person.
Blood… That beautiful red was creating this scene. It felt more like a movie than real life, bubbles was lying on the side of the sidewalk. A puddle of blood was festering under her. Her eyes were glazed staring on into nothing. "Oh god! Bubbles hold on!" Blossom had screamed. It seemed that she was okay. My heart hurts so bad, I kneel beside bubbles. Her lips move but I hear nothing, still the message goes across "I love you my sister." Blood, there was too much of it. Then Bubbles eyes begin to fall, a small smile etches itself on her dying face. She's looking at me. Why do you have a smile on your face? It's all happening to fast, I have to move, do something. Yet there is nothing that I can do and I feel helpless to fate. Rage, blind fury, heat, fire, it pushes out through my soul and I scream a heart wrenching scream heard all across the world. It was full of power and vengeance, and sorrow. It. Was. Chilled. The lock breaks a little more, may you rest in peace. I lock eyes one last time with bubbles and her eyes blink out a tear and finally, she dies. Just like that. And at last I let out the scream that was festering behind my lips go. Yet all my heart hears is a hollow silence.
It had been 2 years, two long painful years since bubbles had died. That's when my easy life had been destroyed. Bubbles dying had been the catalyst to on long row of baneful memories. 1 year and three months since blossom had bought herself a gun, but it in her mouth, and pulled the triger. Bubbles meant too much to blossom. I guess life really wasn't worth living to her now that I wasn't living in Florida anymore. 1 year and a half since my mother went crazy. Shocker. Somehow I always knew she would get murdered or something, she was a homewreacker to begin with. It only fits that she would get what she deserved one day. Nearly half awake and half dead they had found her in a club, drugged and raped. Hence causing her to loose herself and she landed straight into a straight jacket. I could care less really, she wasn't my mother, she was nothing but an extra bank account I could dig into to survive, harsh I know but like I stated before. I could care less. Life back in the streets did have one positive. I learned that in life, you could be naïve and depend on people that treated you like trash, or you could stand on your on feet and endure.
Since then I had turned 16. Yet my life had done little but make me bitter and cold. It turned out my father had been alive all these years, and had fought the court in order to take me in. Since I had no other guardian, the court had granted my father permission to take custody of me. It had been 3 years since I was 16 that he had gotten drunk and attempted to rape me thinking I was my mother. It had landed my father in jail for life without parole considering they had managed to tie him to the rape and attempted murder of Vivi.
I was out on my own now. 19 and striving for a better tomorrow. Vivi had managed to kill herself; my father had been killed in prison. Turns out it wasn't a bad thing that he was my father. I learned that my father had been a little rich kid living the high life when my mother had met him. Her gold digging ways had landed her a private account, and when she became pregnant with me. Father dearest had been stocking up more and more money in the account to keep her from spilling her guts out that he had an illegitimate child. You see my fathers name was Fugaku Uchiha, and he was a corporate boss, that had been married when he met Vivi Haruno. So now that private account was mine. Since it was my mothers and she died, it all went to me. If I managed it all correctly I could live all my life on just this account.
Meanwhile the uchiha family never realized that their leader was a disgrace. It was all kept under the covers by bribed police. Mikoto Uchiha had mysteriously disappeared when she found out and all the Uchiha Corp had gone to Uchiha Itachi. The Uchiha brothers had never found out about their half sister, and if I had it my way they never would. Yet fate would not have the same opinion.
I stood before the giant looming gates of the dance university I had somehow managed to get a scholarship to. I was smart, extremely so. Still, I was amassed when I had been granted the scholarship of a lifetime. The schools name was ko-leaf University. The school was on the top ten schools of the world. It was where all the great dancers had made their names known. But it was also a school for rich kids and snobby now-it-alls. Somehow this day would change my life forever.HaHh