Disclaimer: I don't own "Falling Skies."

One: Tag Along

"You're up!" Anne exclaimed as she trudged back onto the med bus.

I nodded, giving her a weak smile as I finished taking rounds of the filled cots. There was no such thing having a day without injury or illness. It almost seemed like a numbers game. For every person that wound up on the med bus by noon, two more ended up in a cot for observation during the night.

"There're things to do," I sighed, tucking my hair behind my ear.

"Well, it's good to not just sit," Anne smiled, and I stared at her blankly.

Why was she smilingly? There was nothing left to smile about. People were dead, and if they weren't dead they were wounded or ill. Finally, there were the rest of us who comprised a mere blip on the radar of survivors that wandered around like fools fighting giants that we could never hope to overcome in the end. That was the crux of it; I knew. Whatever hope I had clung to so vigilantly this last year had all been snuffed out as I watched the things crawl out of Jamil's mouth.

The Overlords using their Skitter slaves and metal Mechs had devastated the world with their bombs. Then they narrowed their conquest, aligning their strategy as they enslaved children and killed the rest of us. For so long, I had thought that if I prayed enough and thanked God for the rain that quenched our thirst or the measly cans of soup that fighters brought home after scavenging that God would fix this world somehow.

The more time passed, the less I prayed. Every bad day, every death, every memory of what had been began to outweigh all the good that I had tediously searched for, making mountains of molehills just to have a worthy prayer. I wanted to scoff at myself and my own stupidity. I had wasted so much time hoping and doing what I could that I had seemingly spun myself in a circle.

Only on this revolution, it was just me. There was no prayer, hope, or even God. It was lonely I'll admit, and I could feel the anger surge through me. I had never felt this kind of anger in my entire life. It both scared and exhilarated me.

I shrugged as Anne began visiting with one of the fighters, and I could still feel her concerned glances at my scowling. I ignored them though as I organized the tray of medicines, labeling them and tucking them away in the cabinet. It was the same as I had done yesterday, the day before that, and the day even before that. It was an endless task, and losing focusing, I began to stare out the window into the woods.

Our convoy was resting for a few hours on our way to Charleston. So then why was Ben Mason tromping through the falling snow with his entire backpack over his shoulder? Where was he going? Fighters left but not alone and not with their bags in tow. He only got just beyond the first trees when Tom appeared, standing with his gun over his shoulder as if he had been anticipating the moment. Ben stepped back out of surprise.

"He's leaving," I whispered, staring at them talk with Ben smirking uneasily and not quite meeting his father's eyes. Anne heard and came to the window.

"I had hoped he wouldn't," She shook her head sadly.

"I suppose he has to," I stated numbly, and Anne turned to me in surprise. Perhaps, I had even surprised myself. "He doesn't fit in here," I continued. "The ridicule and laughter at his expense—not to mention everyone thinks he killed Jimmy…

"He didn't kill…"

"I didn't say he did!" I yelled before Anne's words could even finish falling from her mouth. "You know it's true. It's better he leaves…at least he's doing something, instead of driving off to Charleston on a wing and a prayer."

"Lourdes!" Anne exclaimed, looking at me like she had never seen me before.

"It's true! Maybe, people don't want to hear about a Skitter rebellion or kids with spikes on their backs, but they're here! Charleston isn't some safe haven with amusement parks and three square meals a day! It's just a stupid hope! The 2nd Mass is as well! Don't look so shocked! We've lost a half dozen people since the siege with Karen!"

I half-expected Anne to hit me by the fury that marred her eyes, but she didn't. She only looked at me with pity like I had just hobbled on the bus riddled with Mech bullets. She swallowed hard, and I pretended not to notice the tears budding in her eyes.

"You're wrong Lourdes," She said calmly, collecting herself. "You're just angry because of…"

"Because Jamil is dead?" I laughed maniacally. "Maybe, I am. So what? I am angry. You should be too. Jamil, your husband and Sammie, my parents—they're all dead! My uncle and aunt lived in a town with less than a thousand people, and they're even dead. Our survival is only temporary. It's dumb luck in the midst of a messed up world!"

"Lourdes sweetheart…" She reached for me. I didn't care if she wanted to hug me or strangle me. A part of me wished it was the latter option as I turned away at her touch.

I went to the cot at the back, reaching underneath for my bag that was always filled. All I had left was the jacket on the floor and the bible that fell out of it with a thud as I shoved the jacket on. Begrudgingly, I shoved the bible into my bag as well even though I wanted nothing more than to chunk it out the window. However, it was the only thing that I still had that was mine from before. My clothes, my shoes, the bag—all were things that were collected over time, petty thievery from abandoned shopping malls. The bible was my only reminder that this world I lived in had not always been so.

Once there had been hope. That was gone, and now the bible would serve as my reminder to not bother clinging to it anymore as we careened off the cliff one-by-one as the months passed.

"What are you doing?" Anne questioned as I stormed about, pulling my handgun from underneath my pillow and taking two water bottles from the supply.

I didn't meet her eyes as I spoke, "I'm leaving."

"What? Why?"

"Because I can."

"You have an obligation Lourdes to the 2nd Mass!"

"An obligation?" I spat. "Maybe, you do Anne, but I never signed a piece of paper!"

"Lourdes, think about this!" She begged, and I saw Tom and Ben embracing in the woods beyond the window.

"I have."

"For a second!"

"It takes less time to take a life," I reasoned. "It's more than enough time to make a decision."

"Lourdes!" She exclaimed, following me and pulling me up short causing me to slip and whirl around.

"Please just let me go," I said, begging her, and she did reluctantly, releasing my arm as I stalked closer to the Masons. They had looked up with Anne and my intrusion upon their intimate moment.

"She's trying to leave!" Anne announced to Tom like when a mother informed her husband when he came home from work and was now expected to reprimand a child for their wrongdoing much earlier in the day. I wasn't Anne's child though or even Tom's. I wasn't even a child.

Not bothering to face Tom, I turned to Ben who eyed me with confusion, "You're leaving?"

"Yeah," He nodded.

"Can I come with you?"

"Excuse me?"

"Can I come with you? I don't care where you're going or what you're up to. I won't even get in your way. Can I?"

Ben looked to Tom for permission, and Tom only stood mutely, trying to come up with the most polite way to tell me to listen to Anne and suggest I go back to the med bus where I belong.

"I'm not asking your dad," I informed Ben, and his jaw dropped open. "I'm asking you."

"Lourdes, I don't think…"

"A no would suffice," I said haughtily, stepping back out of disappointment and releasing the breath I had not even realized I held.

What had I been expecting? I was going to throw a fit and run off with a fifteen-year-old who could break me in half if he was under the right or rather the wrong influence. One Overlord too close to him and I was dead. Dejectedly, the idea seemed somewhat agreeable.

"I'm sorry," Ben said, and I truly looked at him for the first time.

He had grown so much in the few short months I had known him. His baby face was just a shadow of what was the face of a young man, and I tried to remember his longer, curlier locks from when he was first de-harnessed. He had been so sweet at first, but the spikes on his back never left. Slowly but surely he changed. He had become calloused over time, opening his eyes to what the 2nd Mass turned a blind eye to.

"Me too, I thought you'd be different," I whispered, standing firmly as I looked at him. I could practically hear Tom and Anne's sighs of relief that Ben had turned me down, and I felt my heart sink even lower than it had been.

"Why do you even want to come?" Ben asked, shaking his head.

"The same reason you want to leave."

Ben swallowed hard, looking at his feet and the ground instead of his father before exhaling loudly, "I guess you can come, but you have to understand this isn't for a week or something. It could be a long time before we come back or…"

It hurt to see his sad glance to Tom, and I truly felt awful for making this moment even tenser, "I understand."

"You sure?"

I kept myself from meeting Anne's eyes, but I could hear her crying as I nodded, "I'm positive. I want to go."