A/N Hi guys. Sorry about the lack in updates to all my stories, but as you may have guessed - my laptop died...again. :'( But luckily for me, a dear friend I know has listen to me on and off complaining about anything and everything. So this is a somewhat thank you gift for 'Nobledonkey' - without whom, I'd probably be bonkers and writing bum on the wall :) So cheers mate, I know I can be a pain in the arse most of the time =]
Title: Contract Of Hearts.
Chapters: 1 - this a one shot. (duh)
Summary: There's a fine line between love and hate - the two of which you can't have one without the other.
Pairing(s); Randy/Wade. Not your cup of tea? Then back out. (Dom/Sub) ~ Always.
Ratings/Warnings: T, possibly M, but nothing too "out there." MxM. Slash. ;)
Contract Of Hearts.
Why? Because I hate him? Because he's the most despicable human being that has ever walked this earth? Because he is the one person that can hurt me with just a single look, he makes me feel like I don't belong here in the wwe - or that I shouldn't even be breathing the same air as him and his friends - and that I should probably seek my own death? Maybe because with just one word escaping his perfect lips, I get angry, hitting everything (everyone) around me - snapping at them and acting in the most pathetic like manner. Letting myself drown in the endless pool of hatred I hold for him, which he loves to watch me sinker lower and lower into. Because finally, I don't even have the courage to fight him anymore, to want to kill him for everything he has where I have nothing.
Because now, I've gave him a card to use against me, and that's a card that held my weakness, my stupidity, my heart...
I gave him my body and soul on that day when he looked me from head to toe - the knowingly look of disgust he held as he looked me up and down. I felt like strangling him... that day - we fought yet again. Because, at the moment he pushed me against the wall, holding my wrists so tightly above my head - I could no longer feel the blood flow to them. That day, I dared telling him to hit me with all the rage and hatred he held against me because otherwise; I'd hit him and he'd regret it.
Because that day, either he was drunk, crazy or had been hit on the head a little too hard in one of our matches - because right then, his hand hit my cheek with more brutality than ever before and without warning - he crushed his lips onto mine. Biting them hard, tasting the blood from them enter my mouth as his tongue slipped into my mouth. Because only moments later, we found each other completely naked on the cold floor, my legs wrapped around his waist and my arms around his neck as he thrust into me. I ended up sounding like a whore, begging him, begging my worst enemy, to fuck me into the ground - feeling ashamed, but not being able to fight the pleasure he was giving me so roughly. I loved every minute of it, the bliss feeling of having him in me - it had been so long since anyone had touched me, let allow did that to me.
It's simple, though...It happened because I love him as much as I hate him and because it is so much easier to hate than to have to withstand the looks of insults and disgusts he sends my way - all the while knowing how much I love him. Having to see him every day without being able to utter any words but hatred to him, not being able to tell him that I love him, that I need him. Having to just stand there and watch him flirt right, left and center with all the divas - acting as if what happened hadn't actually happened - as if I wasn't anything more than a quick fuck. It's so much easier to convince myself that I hate him, then to cry at night when he just looks through me when I want to say I love him.
There is nothing more painful than love, and much worse, a love that is never shared. And during that one night, he made me feel like a royal slut, a whore and yet a man at the same time. Because that night, he did something he never did to any diva or other superstar...he kissed me...he kissed me square on the lips and if there was one thing the whole of the wwe population knew - was that he never kissed anyone on the lips. Not even his ex-wife or lovers. Never.
I'm angry, confused, mad and lost. Although he doesn't insult me every day now, he hasn't changed either. He still thinks he's at the top of the world - but I always thought being at the top would be the loneliest, yet I wanted the same thing. I hate the whole situation. I never even thought of falling in love with someone so...annoyingly arrogant and cold-hearted as him, someone who doesn't even flinch when I hit him or wince when he calls me all those horrible names. And yet; I want nothing more than to kiss him, to be in his arms, to have sex with him again - to even so much as have his children (even if it is impossible) All simply because I love him. What a ridiculous feeling it is, what good does it do to Love? The love I have for him is impossible, senseless and thoughtless. I don't know how to process it anymore, to come to grips with it when he doesn't even look at me like I'm a person.
Its been three long months now since that infamous night. I walk the halls of the arenas we go to like a ghost, ready to insult the first person who even offers me a "good luck tonight." I'm angry. I can't sleep at night anymore, whenever I do fall asleep, I see him - smirking down at me as I try to move but I'm tied to a bed - I can do nothing but stay there until he's done playing with my body. Teasing me, touching me, making me beg again - all for his sick pleasure. He even hates me in my dreams.
I can't take it anymore.
From the table I sit at with the Nexus, playing carelessly with my food, I can tell his just walked into the small room where most came to eat. The gasps and people trying to quickly get away as he walked closer gives me a clue. At this point in time, he walks by me and the Nexus, I feel my body ache for him - every part attracted to him.
My eyes are burning and I know it's official; It's emotionally impossible for me to stay away from him any longer. As he walks passed me, I stand up, my plate of food falling to his feet - everyone's eyes were on me as I glared at him. Everyone's watching me as if I've lost my mind or have two heads as I yell I hate him, closing the already short distance between us - raising my hand and then I go to slap him with all my being.
But the smug bastard has the nerve to grab my wrist in mid swing - only meters from his face. His cold steel-blue eyes glare into me, showing no emotion what so ever - and finally, like a child, my tears fall. It piss' me off because I feel weak and defenseless against him. All eyes in the room are on me and him, I keep mumbling how much I hate him as my tears burn holes into my cheeks. I continue to cry, suddenly pulled to him - his staring at me intensely. What happens next does surprise me though, because unexpectedly, he's thin lips are once again on my.
Why? I want to find out, but my body goes against all my senses - my arms wrap around his neck and my green eyes close tightly as I hold onto him as long as possible. His bronze coloured hands go into my hair, pulling at my black locks softly, his kiss is so passionate and pure that I just want to snog him all day long - his tongue comes into play as it enters my mouth. Just as I was getting into it, trying my hardest not to moan like a slag, he pulls away from me. Why?
Stormy steel blue eyes look at me. This time their just looking AT ME, not through me, not seeing into me - just me. I feel myself shaking, whether from anger about what he was going to say next, or just embarrassment - I don't know. I can hear the whispers coming from the Nexus behind me, David's mumbling how disgusting I am, Heath and Justin are trying to understand what's just gone on and everyone else is too shocked to say a thing. My stomach knots as I try to stop the tears from falling anymore, why isn't he saying anything? Is he going to leave? Slap me, hate me, hit me, kick me, torture me? Or...is he...going to love me?
I've never been so scared to hear a person speak before, his face is unreadable and his body has tensed up just like mine. Slowly his mouth opens, his eyes on mine, his face remains cold as always - and at that very moment - I want nothing more than to run and hide from everyone. Screw the wwe, screw the fans, screw ever becoming world champion - is that all worth having your heart smashed into tiny pieces over and over again? Like a glass being dropped on the floor, you can try to put it all back together again - but the once beautiful glass will never be the same. Is. It. Worth. It?
His voice has the normal hiss to it, like a snake.
"I hate you more than anyone or anything else in this entire world...Because you're smart, you're great friends with Justin and Heath where as I have no one, you're not afraid to tell people what you truly think of them, and you're outstandingly beautiful - and what's worst is that I can't stop thinking about you. I have no idea why, but I'm sort of glad that you're the kind of person to step up to me and decide your gonna slap me - not many people even dare to look at me the wrong way." His normal cocky smirk comes out to play before he continues. "If it was up to me; I would have pushed you far away in the corner of my mind and let your rot there without ever telling a soul how I feel about you. Maybe I'm more crazy than I first thought for feeling this way to you, of all people, my worst enemy - when I know my father would skin you alive if he ever knew I was dating another guy. But I'd protect you from him, simply because you drive me mental - and staying away from you just seems damn right impossible."
...My hearts beating so loud as he talks. I know he's not tricking me, his eyes show the emotion they normally lack in. I hear everyone talking amongst themselves, but I can barely hear a word as I just stare at him, too shocked to move. Despite all the unhealthy hatred we share, despite the fact that the Nexus want him gone, despite the fact that we'll one day end up fighting for good and that he'll probably leave me if I disappoint him...
I can't help the fact that I'm actually in love with him.
Because my body, my heart and my soul - would shatter without him. I know I'll only ever want one person on this earth...Randy Orton.
d-_-b.
I know, weird, right? Especially with all those "Because's and Why's?" But it's something different, and, in case you haven't guessed yet, this was in Wade's Point Of View. :) Thanks for reading, and I'm sorry about all the mistakes - I really don't mean them.