This is not Home
Home is where life is not certain. Home is where I and my foes balance on the edge of a kunai, victory unknown, uncertain.
Home is not this simpering, weak place where War is masked with Commonplace.
Konoha was my home, when I was young; before I was changed. Smiles and laughter were comforting; the smells of paper, of clean air, of the myriad foodstuffs, all I needed. The sounds and sights of this village, no, city, were good enough for a youngster.
But I am not a youngster, and this is not my home.
My home is the stench of blood, of burning and rotting flesh, of the sting of smoke in my eyes and nose.
My home is the sight of earth scarred by attack after relentless attack, bodies scattered with no regard for who they were, and who misses them.
My home is the sound of screaming.
No one understands that I do not care for them anymore. No one realizes that I'm not so much obsessed with the safety of the country as with the feel of my blade slicing neatly through my enemy. No one but others of my kind.
I am not alone, oh no; I am just the only one expected to stay unfazed, to loved this land forever, to want to protect its people for the sake of protecting. I cannot possibly be like those common frauds, who live to kill!
But I am.
Konoha is no longer where I go for comfort. I have no true friends... my family is slaughtered. Icha Icha Paradise is, to me, only a pleasant diversion in this holiday-spot, as I calmly wait to be sent home. If I voiced these thoughts to any but my fellow Shinobi, I would be smiled at in a patronizing way, and whoever I told would pat my head and tell me to 'Not worry about the larger scale of things'.
Which is why I never speak about War to others. They think I'm scatterbrained, or odd, or 'touched in the head', if they're being polite. None of them stop and... and THINK.
This wimpy little place with hardly any problems isn't what I'm trained to, what I'm BRED to. I'm trained to fight, and fight well; I'm bred to have no qualms about killing a man, or a woman, or a child. This isn't my home.
Home is where I can kill, and have the delicious thrill of nearly being killed.
My name is Hatake Kakashi, and I am a True Shinobi.