Hello everyone! So, here is my first story in english, there's probably some mistakes.
This is about Hameron, my favourite ship in House!
I have already write it in french, but I think english is a beautiful language and I wanted to try... this was really hard to me, but finally, I think it was a great experience, and I'll probably write another stories in english!
And I really want to say thanks to Kizzie Ann and Jewelzy for their help, without them, you wouldn't be reading this fic! Go on their profil, their stories are beautiful!
And thanks to RoseAlix95 for have reading it, her fanfics are amazing too!
Rating: T.
Pairing: Allison Cameron / Gregory House.
Summary: After their horrible date, Cameron and House try to forget, in vain. What happen when they both realize they're in love with each other? Hameron. Post 1X20 "Love hurts".
Disclaimer : I don't own House M.D. and its characters.
It was you- Hameron.
It was stupid.
Really, really, stupid.
He didn't even want a date with her! But he had to do that, she didn't let him any choice. He needed her at the office! He went there just for it. That was all. It wasn't like he had been attracted by her, or anything!
The date had been a real catastrophe.
At first, when he had fetched her at her home, he had been captivated by her. She was so beautiful. She seemed to have noticed it because of the way she had smiled at him. He hated it when she smiled, especially what happened inside him when she did that.
He remained there, glued to her, and she knew that she had scored a point.
When they arrived at the restaurant, he decided to stop. For that, what better than being the fool he used to be?
It worked. She didn't say a word from that moment. She just ate, emotionless. He almost felt guilty.
The most beautiful was Allison's smile.
But it was better that way.
Of course, he had not thought about his words, but he had to do that.
Now, she would realize what he really was: a bastard.
He had not wanted the diner to be fine. In that case, she (just like him) would have had false hopes. Everything would have been perfect, until he'd done or said something wrong. They would have both been disappointed.
She, because she had been so stupid and to believe was a good man.
He, for having thought a woman like her could have ever wanted an idiot like him.
So this morning, when she had returned to Diagnostic's department with red and swollen eyes, he had avoided her, under the pretext that Cuddy had to talk to him.
And it was stupid.
Well, he was a stupid man.
He felt almost guilty, something that rarely happened to him in his whole miserable life.
2 weeks later…
It had been two weeks now.
Two weeks in which House had avoided her. And she knew he didn't love her.
He loved Cuddy.
She was such an idiot.
She had to realize that before! He had accepted this date only to make her return to work, but she was wrong… he didn't love her.
It had been Cuddy. From the beginning.
After their terrible date, he had almost always been staying at Cuddy's office, especially whenever Allison arrived at the Diagnostic's room.
That was obvious, now.
She was trying so hard to hate him, just like everyone else did – but it was impossible for her.
She was deeply, desperately in love with doctor Gregory House.
And she couldn't help it.
It had been two weeks now.
Two weeks that he had hidden himself like a five year old child.
House never had been ashamed in his life… except for now.
When they had no cases to solve, he had made believe that he had something to resolve with Cuddy. He had made so many mistakes (or let's say bullshit) that this lie was entirely believable!
In fact, he went to Wilson's office, played just one of his stupid games in an empty consultation's room, or watched TV in the room of the old man in coma.
Cameron almost took pity on him. He noticed she wasn't well. She didn't smile anymore, didn't speak with the same conviction and wasn't wearing makeup anymore.
Why was she that troubled?
Did she have any problems?
Certainly, if she wasn't fine, it wouldn't be because of their date!
She had recovered from it!
And, women never had been so upset only because of a man like him!
He had to know…
This evening, as she left the hospital, Allison heard House follow her into the parking lot.
He certainly didn't want to talk to her!
"Cameron! "
She slowly turned around, throwing a questioning look at him and asked:
"Me?
-No, I just have fun screaming names from time to time. It's my new passion! he answered sarcastically, as always.
-What's going on, House? "she asked, with a serious tone in her voice..
He bowed his head, cleared his throat and asked, ill-at-ease:
"Are you okay?
-Yes. Why would you ask?
-I know when you're lying, Cameron. I can feel you're not well.
-Then what?! » she retorted in defiance.
He seemed almost disappointed by her answer. But what had he expected?! That she would tell him how she felt for him?! No, she had already tried, and it hadn't worked.
He coughed slightly and said:
"No matter what your problem is solve it, and quickly. I don't want it to interfere with your job.
-What?! I never had any problems with patients! And besides that: are you sure that you're asking this question only because of my job?!"
He raised his head and replied:
"For what else? "
She had heard enough of this.
Sharply, she retorted:
"Fine. See you tomorrow at the office, then. Oh! And send greetings to Cuddy! "
She rapidly turned, climbed into her car, and slammed the door shut.
House didn't move.
He had failed again.
All he had wanted was to act kindly, conscious about her. But he had become this coward.
And Cameron had changed from sadness to anger.
He couldn't even talk to her without hurting her.
What kind of a person was he?
He didn't like to feel sorry for himself, or be self-loathing, but he had never loathed himself so much in his whole life.
She hated him now.
He had many opportunities, but had left them slip away.
It was too late. He remembered her last words:
« And send greetings to Cuddy! »
What had she meant by that?
That she understood his game?
That she knew he was nothing but a coward who found apologies in order to avoid her?
Then, realization slowly dawned:
« And send greetings to Cuddy! »
The fury in her voice, the tears which had started to pearl in her beautiful green eyes, the swiftness with which she had returned to her car…
Was she… jealous of Cuddy ?
But then…
Oh.
What a fool he was. She thought he was in love with Cuddy.
He quickly dressed, trying not to wake up Wilson.
"Where are you going this late, House? asked a voice from the couch.
-Don't worry, mom, I'll be here for three a.m.! »
Three. It was three a.m.!
Who was the idiot who was knocking at her door this late?!
She put her glass of Whiskey on the end table, rose from the sofa and went to the door to open.
House.
How dared he come here?!
She tried to close the door, but his cane prevented her from shutting it close again.
So she opened.
"Did your mother never tell you that it was uncivil to close the door to poor lames?" he asked her, feigning sadness.
She motioned him to get in.
He observed her living room for seconds, then started:
"Hum… tell me, will you have a hangover tomorrow? It's not safe for patients!
-Well, me, I'm not drugged." she answered tit for tat.
He didn't know how to answer, and she was almost proud of it.
"So, what are you doing here, at three in the morning?!
-Don't tell me I woke you! he trumped pointing at the glass on the table.
-You didn't answer my question.
-Neither did you. »
She threw a questioning look at him.
"I still don't know what happened to you, he explained.
-So you came here to know that!
-No, but to… apologize.
-I beg your pardon? she asked, popeyed.
-I'm sorry, he repeated, without looking at her.
-Why are you sorry? And does Cuddy know you're here? Because seriously, I really don't want to be involved in your stor…
-I don't love Cuddy.
-Sorry?
-I don't love Cuddy. How often do you want me to repeat that sentence?! he said, pretending to be desperate.
-Then, why do you spend so much time at her office? Oh! No, to be honest, I don't want to know…
-I'm avoiding you.
-Really?
-I'm avoiding you since our date.
-And why is that? she asked with a smile.
-Do you really have to ask?! he laughed bitterly. Because of all the things I said to you, for having been a bastard, for what I…"
He didn't finish his sentence. Allison had approached him and pressed her lips against his.
He didn't want to kiss her. He didn't want to love her. He didn't want her to love him either. All this was going to end in a terrible way.
But he was tired of thinking "if" and for once in his life, he shut down his mind.
He decided to deepen the kiss and slipped his tongue into her mouth. She moaned softly and curled her arms around his shoulders. He stroked her back, thinking he had never felt that way during his whole life, had never loved so much, not even Stacy.
When they finally separated, both breathless, they looked at each other. Something astonished, almost frightened Cameron: House seemed to have tears in his eyes. She opened her mouth for say something, but he interrupted her:
"It will not work, Cameron. "
Once more, she silenced him, kissing him, but this time, more ferociously than before. She started to unbuttoned his shirt. He shuddered and carried her as he could to her bed.
House didn't return home that night.
He woke up with Cameron sleeping against his torso chest. She was so beautiful… especially when she slept. Her lovely chestnut curls framed her face, she looked so peaceful…
The most beautiful woman he had ever seen
She was wasting her time with him.
Cameron woke up around 9:00 a.m. She automatically turned over to embrace House, but she didn't feel anything. Her bed was empty. She panicked slightly: what if all this was just a dream?
But when she arrived at the living room, she remarked the glass of whiskey
It had really happened.
Euphoria was quickly replaced by fear. Why had he gone? Had he thought it… bad? Had he realized that it hadn't been what he had needed?
She looked at the clock. 9:00 a.m. He surely had gone to work!
"Shit!" she cursed: she was late!
When she arrived at work at half past nine, Foreman and Chase were seated, drinking their coffee, listening to House, who was standing at the board.
She entered, trying not to make any sound.
"Cameron, we've been waiting for you! Foreman said friendly.
-Sorry! she answered, a sheepish smile on her face.
She tried to look at House, but his eyes stayed fixed on the board.
-You spent the night with a young and handsome boy, we guess! Chase joked.
-Or maybe he was old and ugly! " Foreman added.
Cameron, amused, was about answer to them, but House interrupted her:
« That's very funny, Foreman, but instead of doing your one man show, can you tell me concretely what's the patient's problem?
House was really edgy.
-No, Foreman retorted, shocked by the chief's reaction.
-Fine, then well, shut up. Chase and Cameron, hover a MRI to the patient and you Foreman, go take a look at her domicile."
Foreman and Chase left, while Allison stayed and fixed her gaze on House, smiling.
He just threw a questioning look at her and asked:
"Yes? "
Cameron was irritated by the coldness in his voice.
"Well I… uh I mean, we… this night! she stammered, with an embarrassed giggle.
-What are you talking about?
-Ah ah, really funny, House.
-Look Cameron, what happened this night was a mistake. It wasn't supposed to happen.
-Pardon? You can't be serious!
She felt the tears rise. House looked down.
-Cameron, Chase is probably waiting for you for the MRI. "
She left the room and slammed the door shut.
"Have you seen House? He looked like Cuddy!" Chase joked during the MRI.
Proud of his jest, he turned in order to see Cameron's reaction, but she stared at the glass. He had never seen her so cold, so unemotional, her face was deadpan.
"Allison, are you okay?! " Chase worried.
She didn't move at all, didn't answer.
Chase decided better let her be.
Around 6:00 p.m. …
He had probably survived the worst day ever. If Cameron wasn't well before, she was even wrong now. She didn't say a word during the whole day.
He thought about this, until Wilson entered his office.
"What happened with Cameron? he asked immediately.
-Hello. Oh! Me too! I had a great day, thanks for asking!
-House… what did you do? I'm not a fool, you visited her yesterday. What did you do, again?!
-Nothing.
-Have you seen how she is?!
-Of course.
-And you do not care?! Wilson asked, angrier this time.
-Well, it must be horrible to have a depressed doctor, House answered sarcastically.
-Oh, you are really odious! Don't you see, she suffers because of you?!"
House banged his fist on the table and screamed:
"That's exactly why I have nothing to do with her! All her depression, it's my fault; I don't want to be responsible of her misery! What you said is true: I'm odious, heartless, she deserves someone better than that! She deserves someone better than me…"
Wilson looked at him with understanding and said:
"Tell her."
Of course, House didn't listen to his friend's advice. He was too much of a coward to face Cameron. So, he waited until 9:00 to be sure he would not see her anywhere.
Yet, once in the parking lot, he heard sobs.
Her sobs.
He limped toward these sounds and found Cameron sitting on the ground, against her car, crying uncontrollably. It broke his heart.
"Cameron, get up." he said, his voice sounding too firm for him.
She didn't look at him and continued to cry.
"Cameron…" he implored again, trying to sound softer.
If it were up to him, he would sit with her, but his halt leg prevented him from doing so.
One last time, he tried as he reached out his hand to her:
"Allison, please…"
Hearing her name voiced by the man she loved, Cameron looked up and saw his face filled with guilt. She took his hand and rose.
Once on her feet, she flung herself into his arms and started to sob again. She probably seemed ridiculous, but she didn't care. She was so tired and today, the pain had just been too much to bear.
House wasn't used to embrace pretty young women in distress, but seeing his Allison curled up on the ground made him forget his awkwardness.
He dropped his cane, wrapped his arms around her back, stroked her slightly, and rested his chin on her head, which was buried on his shoulder. They remained some minutes in this position, and then slowly, she pulled away from him and apologized:
"I'm sorry, I don't know what came over me"
She recoiled again and repeated:
"I'm sorry."
She wanted to open the door, but House took her hand to keep her from it.
"Cameron, you shouldn't drive while you're feeling that bad, you could have an accident.
-Anyway, would you be sad?!" Allison puffed, looking at him with anger.
He just answered:
« Come on, I'll take you back.
-I don't want to be in the same car with you! she screamed, noticing he didn't react to her precedent sentence.
-You won't have a choice, go up, Allison."
This man exasperated her!
She led to wonder if it was normal that she loved him, but then again, looking into his bloodshot eyes (because he was surely tired by this game he had started years ago) filled with sadness and guilt, she had no more doubts.
She loved him.
She sighed and got into the car.
There was a deathly silence in House's car.
They drove on a small road, near the woods. It was almost dark.
Allison didn't want to talk to him, and he didn't know what to say.
It was perhaps better he kept silent after all.
But she maybe wanted him to apologize, didn't she?
"I'm sorry, Cameron.
-Sorry for what, in point of fact? For having slept with me or for having treated me as a less than nothing after?! she curtly answered.
-Both."
That didn't seem to be the answer she had expected, because she got mad:
"Oh?! So, you still regret having made love to me! Great, was it so bad?!" she gibed.
Exasperated, tired that she couldn't understand, he suddenly turned and they found themselves at edge of the woods.
Allison, shocked, breathed loudly and said:
"But what…"
He interrupted her:
"If I regret what happened yesterday, it's not because I didn't like it, not because I don't like you, but because it was a mistake. Yes, the biggest mistake in my life! You think that you love me; you think you want me, but if we ever try both, you'll see what I really am, what my true nature is. You are the only one who doesn't look at me like a bastard, a kind of monster unable to feel empathy, but if we decided to love each other, you would change your mind! You've got a problem, Allison, you shouldn't love me! You should be in love with a handsome, young doctor like… Chase, for example! Well, he is maybe, a little idiot, but we forgive him that! Why me?! What I said during dinner was true: I'm twice your age, I'm not great looking, I'm not charming, I'm not even nice! So, it seems clear: you shouldn't have to do anything with a guy like me! Only women who were unlucky enough to get me a chance are injured outputs! "Old", "ugly" and "odious": these are three adjectives that characterize me I heard today! You shouldn't, can't' love me!"
When he had finished, he looked at Allison's beautiful face. She was crying. Then, he realized he was about to shed tears too.
She answered him:
"I've not asked you to approve of my love for you. I don't want you to tell me what I have to feel. I don't care about how many people can hate you. I don't want a list of your flaws. All I'm asking for is to know if you love me."
He looked at her. Her eyes. Her beautiful blue eyes, that could become green in the sun and he did not often dare to look. Her hair. Her pretty chestnut curls that he had always dreamed of caressing. Her lips. Her magnificent lips he wanted to kiss so badly.
She. The woman he loved. The only one.
"Yes.
-Say it."
He inspired:
"I love you, Allison."
Tears were streaming down his cheeks now, and he looked probably ridiculous, but he didn't care.
She threw a watery smile at him, and whispered:
"I love you too."
They both slowly approached and softly kissed.
This kiss tasted salty, because the tears of each other were mixed in. It was sweet, not like the one they had shared the evening before, both expressing the love they were feeling for one another. He could feel her smile, and for the first time in his life, he could truly say he was happy.
When they separated, he stroked her cheek, smiled at her, and said:
"It was you, Allison. It's always been you."
The end.
Please, let me a review, it will really make my day and I will be grateful for that! :D