Draco Madison---------Part1---------By Chrissy
Disclaimer: "Billy Madison" is owned by Universal Studios, Tim Herlihy & Adam Sandler.
All characters are owned by J.K. Rowling
I own nothing but the idea to combine the two, so please, I beg you: DO NOT SUE!
AN: Hi peoples. This is yet another attempt to be funny. This came to me on New Year's Eve while watching Billy Madison. Even funny people can write good because the movie was written by Adam Sandler and Tim Herlihy. So I'll try not to screw this up like everything else I write!
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Draco Madison floated on his inner tube as he drifted across the pool. He was applying sun screen very heavily as he sung, "Sunlight isn't good for me. I must be pale and appear sickly!"
Goyle and Crabbe were on the side of the pool drinking butter beers and they laughed. They laughed even more when Draco said he'd had so much to drink that he couldn't even remember what day it was.
"It's July 31, Draco. Must be killing your liver but hey you only live once!" Goyle said. Crabbe made some sort of agreeing noise as Draco hurried to get out of the pool. Goyle said, "Hey man! Where are you going?"
After gulping down a bottle of Wild Berry Hooch (AN: I do own an occasional six pack of this but I don't actually own the company that makes it or whatever. JASE LOOK: I mentioned it in my writing, aren't I special! Oh yeah I am in the middle of a sentence... SORRY!) Draco smiled as only a drunk could and replied, "It's witchy magazine day!"
Crabbe handed Draco a shirt and Goyle grabbed his broom out of the shed. After taking a butter beer with him, Draco kicked off and flew to the Owlry. Then once he got up there he remembered that the owls would bring him his mail so he landed on the lawn outside of the house and several owls dropped magazines on his head.
Draco flicked through a few and saw he was still #1 on many lists in the magazines such as Richest wizard of his age, Cutest Wizard, Best dressed. None of that applied truly unless there was press around. Right that instant Draco was wearing nothing but swim trunks and a button up shirt that happened to be open. His hair was brushed and he had enough sun screen on to keep the entire country pale for years. Draco just used his dad's money because he didn't have a job.
His father kept trying to get him to take a job at the ministry but Draco never saw the need. Lucius Madison was head of Foreign Wizardry. He made sure the foreign wizarding ambassadors and ministers of magic had lodging and were spoiled rotten. Lucius could give his position to whomever he wanted while Fudge was still Minister of Magic. Draco just assumed that his father would give him the position when he stepped down.
Draco left the magazines there, outside the manor, and took up to the air again. As he was flying he swore he saw the Snitch and he chased after it. Somehow, Potter was there too, going after the Snitch. Draco dived to catch it and crashed right into the front door of the Manor.
His father was outside welcoming in some co-workers for a meeting. Lucius sighed as he looked at his son and hurried all the other people inside. Meeka the house elf came outside. "Sir's told Meeka to get young sir dressed. Sir come with Meeka and Meeka will dress you for Sir's meeting."
"That's okay I can dress myself. Go tell my father I'll be right there." Draco said as he cursed Potter in his mind. He made his way up to his room and changed into his robes. He was sure he hadn't been imagining Potter. But where'd he gone off to... vanished into thin air? Draco hoped that Potter had spontaneously combusted, but he doubted it.
Draco walked in and sat next to his father. Snape was sitting next to Draco but Pettigrew was near also. Pettigrew was glaring at Draco but Draco, being drunk, decided to go up to him and poked Peter in his (none too small) stomach. "Whoa I felt that kick! Pettigrew is pregnant, congratulations! This ones gonna be a football player he is!" Pettigrew pushed Billy away and turned red, he wasn't pregnant just pleasantly plump.
"SIT DOWN DRACO." Came the command from Lucius. Draco did as he was told and sat threw the boring meeting. Peter, Draco, Severus and Lucius were the only ones in Lucius' office after the meeting. He had said that he didn't think Draco was responsible enough to handle the position. He continued to say, "And that is why, when I step down, I will give the position to Peter."
"DAD! NO! I can handle it!" Draco said. If he didn't have his Dad's position he'd be living in a cardboard box and eating his shoes.
"You couldn't even handle school! I had to pay to get you through it." Lucius said. Draco was speechless. Potty and Weasel had implied that but Draco never thought.... he looked at Snape who nodded slightly.
"Then I'll re-do it. I'll go back and do my 7th year over." Draco said, "But I thought I did good on my N.E.W.Ts and O.W.Ls..."
"Draco it wasn't just 7th year it was every year!" Lucius yelled. Peter sat there smiling like the idiot he was.
"Well I was top of my class first year. I excelled in Charms!" Draco said proudly.
"Wingardium Leviosa, Draco." Lucius said to his son who clearly didn't understand
"Yeah so what, Wingardium Leviosia." Draco said. All of his simple charms were screwed up, except for lumos.
"DRACO! IT IS LEVIOSA!" Lucius said and his exasperation was clearly showing. He was losing his patience and his son persisted to be dense.
"Okay I get it! I'll go back and re-do all seven year of school. I'll do each year in two weeks and I'll re-take my OWLs and NEWTs." Draco reasoned with his father.
His father smiled as did Snape. Peter's smiled faded, "You can't seriously be considering this Lucius!" Peter said
"I am. That is the most brilliant thing I have ever heard Draco say. Did you just come up with that?" Lucius asked his son.
"Yes." Draco said. He really hoped Lucius would let him. It wouldn't be so hard ... well actually the OWLs and NEWTs were quite tedious.....
"Brilliant. That shows you can think fast. You'd better go rest up Draco you have school tomorrow, I must go owl Dumbledore." Lucius said as he walked off. Snape left as well leaving Draco and Peter.
"Don't think you can get this position from me Drakey. There is no way you can pass 7 years and re-take your tests in 14 weeks, you just don't have the brains." Peter said and did his little laugh and left.
But as he was at the door he heard Draco say, "And you do?" But he brushed it off and used an obscene gesture and left.
Draco was now all alone so he decided to dance down the stair case. Meeka the house elf was watching from the top of the stairs and she shook her head, "Meeka think sir's gone off of his rocker, Meeka does."
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AN: SO what did you think? REVIEW PLEASE!