A/N: I have been keeping up with since Knockdown and I have not seen anything posted quite like this yet. This catalogues Beckett's thoughts the night following Knockdown. While this wasn't how I had originally imagined this fic turning out, I like it and I hope you enjoy it too. Remember: reviews make me very happy and I would greatly appreciate you leaving one.

Disclaimer: I do not own anything you recognize. Only the plot is mine.

Beckett returned to her apartment after the long night she had just endured. The adrenaline had long since worn off during the paperwork process she was required to fulfill before she went home. She knew she still had more waiting for her; however what was left could wait a few more days. She could barely stand or think by the time she was able to head back into her apartment.

She sighed.

She was another step closer to solving the case of why her mother was murdered. She wouldn't have even been able to get this close if it were not for Castle's constant presence during the case.

Castle…her mind immediately drifted back to that kiss outside the warehouse. How had she felt such passion? It was only a ploy…a distraction right?

She shook her head. She knew that wasn't the case. She had had feelings for him for quite awhile now. She had almost told him right before he left to go off with Gina that summer. But Castle wasn't with Gina anymore. They had broken up.

Sighing she remembered Josh. She was still dating him; however he was halfway across the world saving people. He had no clue as to the events that had transpired in the past couple of days.

It had been Castle who stuck close to her side, Castle who had brought her flowers when she was feeling down and Castle she had let into one of her most closely held secrets. She glanced at her crime board of her mother's murder investigation.

She knew that she had to admit now that Castle had wormed his way into her heart. She felt nothing but friendship towards Josh, but he was safe. She didn't have to deal with messy feeling when she was with him. If she broke up with him, she would be placing her heart on the line once again, and now, after having felt what it could be like with Castle, she didn't think she would be able to take the heartbreak again.

How wonderful would it be to actually be able to be with Castle in that sense though? She allowed herself to dream.

She would wake up by Castle's side and be able to give him a good morning kiss. She would go down for breakfast with Martha, Alexis and Castle. She could just imagine Castle concocting some strange special dish much to the amusement of the rest of his family. He would follow her to the station and shadow her as usual. They would banter, one of her favorite pastimes with him. Lunch probably wouldn't change too much. They would eat a quick take out meal while pouring over the case file, trying to find something that caught their attention. They would catch a break and get the bad guy. If not, they would work until they did. And at night, she would come home and have dinner with Castle, and the rest of the family if they were around. They would then watch some movie (which would most likely be that sci-fi western Castle loved). And at night, she would go to sleep with Castle (hopefully with both meanings of the word present). A blush slightly stained her cheeks at the thought.

That was just a dream though. A wonderful dream. Reality told her that getting together with Castle would be a lot more of a challenge. Someday, maybe they would happen. Until then, he would remain her best friend and partner.

As for Josh, she knew that they would have to have a talk when he returned to the United States. He wouldn't be happy, but she had to be honest with herself. Maybe then, she would be one step closer to her dreams becoming a reality.