It was really hard for her not to cry. Her first songwriting attempt that was really compelling. Emotional. And those were not her words. Mr. Schue, the only one who has heard her song, was fighting his own feelings. Her simple, but mind-blowing statements were there, in plain sight, for everyone else to see.

- Rachel, be honest with me. Were you thinking about Finn when you wrote this?

- I'm not gonna tell you that he doesn't cross my mind many, I mean really many times a day, Mr. Schue. But this song is about my life, my everyday suffering. It's hard to be so focused on helping and never get people to understand my way of doing things. Maybe if I bare my very soul to them, they would think better of me, right?

He nodded.

And she tried to believe in her own words. TRIED. Because she knew that life was more difficult and bitter than her favorite musicals could ever portrait.

She'd asked her teacher to let her sing the song she'd written only at Regionals. He agreed. That song was too precious to be unraveled too soon or wasted because you never know where Sue Sylvester would meddle...

She had presented another original song for the Regionals that was different from the one she'd shown Mr. Schue. Loser like me was funny, up-tempo, like they would expect from bubbly, sparkling Rachel Berry. They all loved the song, they have rehearsed it along with all their Regional numbers non-stop, until the day before they were traveling.

Finn sang a lot of Rachel's song with her. They were talking to each other, at least. It was very hard for her not to break down into a thousand pieces when they were so close to each other again… she thought she would never forget him. What's worse, that he would never forgive her.

- Do you need a lift to go to the airport? You told me your daddys won't make it. You can go with me if you want to.

She felt so inclined to accept his invitation… but she's been working so hard to endure, to keep it all under control to be able to deliver the performance of her life so far… She couldn't spoil things now. As much as his fresh intoxicating smell was now deep inside her soul, she couldn't ruin her chances to do the right thing. Not now that she was so close… Because maybe, if she did things right, he would be able to see things for himself, and he would realize that she was the love of his life…

- I have another things to do before going, I'll take a cab later. Thanks anyway.

He seemed disappointed. Maybe he thought that she would accept anything to be next to him again, but little did he know about her state of mind these days…

Airport, hotel, clothes, last adjustments regarding sound, lights, and they were finally there, singing her first song. The audience applauded, enjoying the happiness that the songs they were singing so far brought them.

Seconds before their last rehearsed song was finished, they felt great. There was no competition that would beat them right now. Everything was amazing so far. But they were about to leave the stage when the announcer draw their attention.

- Now, for the last song, a special original solo by Rachel Berry!

Everyone was staring at her. Some of them were mad. But Mr. Schue asked them to leave Rachel on the stage and take their place on the backstage.

- But Mr. Schue, did you know that? Mercedes was anxious for the answer, as well as the other members of Glee club. Finn was somehow anxious himself, but he swallowed his pride and finally stood up for her. For the first time. For real.

- Guys, let's shut up and listen. Let's listen and discuss it later?

And she gave him a grateful, sweet smile and started singing…

What have I done? I wish I could run
Away from this ship goin' under
Just tryin' to help, hurt everyone else
Now I feel the weight of the world is
On my shoulders

What can you do when your good isn't good enough?
When all that you touch tumbles down?
'Cause my best intentions keep making a mess of things
I just wanna fix it somehow

But how many it times will it take?
Oh, how many times will it take for me
To get it right?
To get it right

Can I start again with my faith shaken?
'Cause I can't go back and undo this
I just have to stay and face my mistakes
But if I get stronger and wiser
I'll get through this

What can you do when your good isn't good enough?
When all that you touch tumbles down?
'Cause my best intentions keep making a mess of things
I just wanna fix it somehow

But how many it times will it take?
Oh, how many times will it take for me
To get it right?

So I throw up my fist
Throw a punch in the air
And accept the truth that sometimes life isn't fair
Yeah, I'll send out a wish
Yeah, I'll send up a prayer
Then finally, someone will see
How much I care!

What can you do when your good isn't good enough?
When all that you touch tumbles down?
'Cause my best intentions keep making a mess of things
I just wanna fix it somehow

But how many it times will it take?
Oh, how many times will it take
To get it right?

To get it right.

How hard was it… She had a tied knot on her throat, tears rolled down her eyes freely while she took a bow and left the stage. A standing ovation cheered her profusely while the curtains were being closed.

What she didn't expect was the whole Glee club sobbing on her song. They were sincerely moved by her words, that messed up with all their own emotions and feelings.

Finn was silent. Dumbfounded. Tears were rolling down his face, no matter how hard he tried to fight them back. He felt guilty. Selfish. Unfair. Things had been so unfair to Rachel so far… He has been the most amazingly JERK to her. He'd never been on her side. She was alone in the world. And he could finally understand how she felt, and why she did what she did with him. He deserved every little thing that happened so far.

He wanted her so badly… he's never stopped loving her, he could realize that now. When he thought about how much she's been through lonely… but how would he approach her now, after all the crap he's been doing lately?