Well, I guess all I'm trying to say is, thanks kid, and if you ever see a chick walking around with dark brown hair with a guitar strapped to her back, that's me. I'm your mom, but you can call me Juno.
I read over the note at least ten to fifteen times before I was able to think clearly again. There was no doubt in my mind who had written it. Three years later and I could still hear her sarcastic comments. The punky teenage girl who had given me all I had ever dreamed for.
Because of her, I had a son.
Gabriel Mark Loring. My sweet angel, named for the archangel Gabriel and for my ex-husband Mark.
Despite the divorce, we're still fairly close. He comes over every Christmas and sends Gabriel birthday presents. Gabriel knows him as Uncle Mark. We don't see the reason to tell him that we used to be married. We felt it'd be too hard to explain to him why we had gotten a divorce.
I hadn't even told him that he was adopted yet. How could I? I've always been somewhat paranoid when it came to the possibility of having children. Before she gave him to me, I was always afraid that they would change their minds.
My fears changed when he came into my life. Now what I feared more than anything else, was that he would discover who his birth mother was. His knowing wasn't what frightened me. I was afraid that he would reject me, refuse to see me as his mother. He'd see me as a kidnaper, someone who stole him away from his real family. I knew I wouldn't be able to handle it if something like that happened.
Thankfully, we haven't had any personal encounters with Juno since before Gabriel was born. We've bumped into each other at the mall on occasion, but that was it. Even then, our conversations were always just an exchange of hellos and 'been nice seeing you's.
She never seemed to acknowledge the squirming baby in my arms, or the inquisitive toddler holding tightly to my fingers. I always just figured that she didn't care. I lived with this assumption for months, until Gabriel brought me the mail this morning.
Most of it was normal- bills, a letter or two from Mark, a Parenting Magazine for me, and a Highlights Magazine for Gabriel. But, at the bottom of the pile was something I never thought I'd see. It didn't look that much like a letter, judging by the envelope. The white of the envelope was faded, and the address was written in yellow/green crayon. There was no return address, but I knew who had sent it, even before I opened it.
The stamp was a picture of an wooden guitar. I recognized the image, trying to remember what Mark had called it. A Harmony.
Juno played a Harmony, if I remembered correctly. From that moment I had no doubt who had sent the letter.
But, why did she want to write to me?
I just assumed the letter was to me, though it was addressed to simply 'Loring', no first name.
When I opened the envelope and began to read, I just felt my heart skip a beat.
Gabriel just looked at me, asking if I was okay. I guess I looked like I was a little scared, and I was.
The letter wasn't for me, it was for Gabriel, from Juno, his birth mother.
I just told him that Mommy was okay, and asked him to go play with Rufus. Rufus was a cat that we had adopted for Gabriel's third birthday, and Gabriel just adored him.
Gabriel smiled and ran upstairs to look for the cat, leaving me alone in the living room.
All I could do was sit on the sofa and read the letter. I could barely believe what I was reading.
Juno almost got an abortion? If she had decided to go through with it, I wonder if I ever would have become a mother. Probably not.
I was also a little disgusted with all the talk about "humping" and "junk" and "Wizard of Gore".
But, I had to laugh.
Reading this letter was just like talking to Juno face-to-face when we first met over three years ago.
Mark had taken his comic books, movies, and CDs with him, but I guess I could buy a copy of Most Fruitful Yuki for Gabriel, if he wanted.
Still, there was a horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach. Why did Juno write this letter? Did she change her mind? Did she want to have Gabriel back? I couldn't even imagine what I would do if she did.
I finished the letter and breathed out a sigh of relief. There was nothing in the letter about Juno wanting her baby. But, she did say that she wished she hadn't chosen the closed adoption.
What had she called it?
"Kicking it Old Testament"?
"Like Moses in the reeds"?
She did want to know her son, Vanessa's son. To be like an aunt, a friend. Sort of like Mark, when I think about it. I folded up the letter, and stuffed it back into the envelope, placing the envelope on top of the fridge. I found the phone book and flipped through until I found the number I was looking for. Once I had the number written down, I went to the phone and dialed it. The phone rang three times before she answered.
"Hello, Juno? It's Vanessa".
Disclaimer: I don't claim to own Juno, that right belongs to Diablo Cody and anyone else who she says can own it. I do own a pair of socks that look like Juno's but that's about it.
Here we go, the sequel to "Hey Kid". There's one more story left in the trilogy for anyone who was wondering.