Midnight Confession

I need to tell her… Soon… It'll be soon…

I paced back and forth between my living room and kitchen. My pulse was racing as my mind began to imagine all the different reactions Kyoko could have. I started to sweat.

What if I make her recoil back to how she was?

The weight of my thoughts hung heavily on my shoulders. I didn't want to be responsible for her inability to love someone—ever. My eyes glanced at the clock: 7:45

Soon.

I'm so late! Tsuruga-san I'm sorry! I'm so sorry!

Internally, I was crying tears of apology; my feet couldn't carry me fast enough to Tsuruga-san's apartment. He had told me there was something urgent he needed to tell me. I was already panicking because I assumed I had done something wrong to warrant this "urgent" talk, but now I was showing up late too! My eyes were fixed on my watch: 8:10

Sorry! Sorry! Sorry!

I repeated like a mantra dashing down the long stretch of road that would lead me to Tsuruga-san's.

She's late

I sighed with a light smile thinking of how she must be sprinting towards my apartment and how profusely she would apologize once she arrived.

How Kyoko like.

As if on cue, the doorbell rang. I looked at the clock again: 8:45. Was I prepared for this? I shook my head changing my mind: Was she ready for this? It wasn't the question of 'was I prepared or not', but 'do I need to tell her'? And the answer was a definite yes.

"You're late." I said with fake exasperation as I stared at the woman I loved. Her hair was a tumbleweed of knots, her make-up, from what I assumed was from her previous job, was smudged, and her sky blue sundress was wrinkled, but to me she looked absolutely stunning.

"I'm so—," I cut her off not wanting to start a 20 minute Kyoko apology session. Tonight, I would be the one saying sorry.

"It's fine. I know you had work." I smiled inviting her in.

"But it was my fault! I forgot some lines and we had to do several takes…" I glared at her. She took the hint and stopped talking mid-sentence. Her mouth stopped moving, but I could tell she was still continuing her rant within her mind.

I'm so unprofessional! Everyone else had to do wait because of me. Now Tsuruga-san had to wait for me! I'm a failure!

I leaned against the door frame with a sigh finally content with my self-scolding. Tsuruga-san looked at me with a weird intensity.

Had his glare always been like this? Maybe he's testing me!

I peered back at him trying to match his intensity wondering if this was an acting exercise. Slowly his mouth turned into a grin, then a laugh.

"Are you hungry? I had dinner ordered." He continued ushering me to the table set with an array of food. My eyes went wide; my mouth watered.

"I really couldn't…" I argued half-heartedly, but I was in reality starving. My watch said 8:50—I hadn't ate anything since this morning.

This is Tsuruga-san's food! I can't possibly eat it!

"You're right I'm not hungry either… I guess I'll just throw this out." I acted a sigh as I started to pick up dishes on the table.

"No! No! You NEED to eat! Let's go." With both hands on my back she pushed me towards the dinner table. I grinned acknowledging my victory.

"Enjoy." I smiled as Kyoko sat opposite of me looking unsure of what to eat first. It was obvious she was hungry. Over the course of the next few minutes Kyoko began to feel more comfortable and ate to her hearts content.

With a mouth filled with food she cried: "Is this my last meal? What did I do wrong!?" Although she was in obvious distress, she still was able to fit another spoonful of food into her mouth.

I spit out the water in my mouth incredulous as to how her thought process led her to that conclusion.

"You did nothing wrong!" I sighed only to remember this was the response I should have been expecting from her. What else would she think? I had invited her out of blue to my apartment telling her it was a very urgent matter.

"Then…" She squeaked washing down the food in her mouth with a gulp of water.

The clock read 9:05.

No… not yet. I'm not ready yet.

"I know I said it was urgent, but it can wait a few more hours." Sweat formed inside my tightly locked fists hoping Kyoko would let me feel secure with our relationship just a little longer.

I was overflowing with happiness—like always when Tsuruga-san and I spent time together. The two of us watched TV, discussed work, practiced acting techniques, and enjoyed each other's company. It felt like a dream. Why was I so comfortable with him? The question shocked me.

When was the last time I was this comfortable?

An image of a fairy prince flashed through my mind. My lips turned into a genuine smile. Corn was where I felt the most at ease… and yet… My smile slowly turned to a frown. I felt like I was betraying Corn. This man in front of me was slowly erasing his image from my mind.

At the moment, we had been watching a late night talk show—the clock in the corner of the screen read 11:30. My body understood my pain before my mind had a chance to process it. I leapt up with gloss covered eyes.

Why was my eyesight so blurry?

"Kyoko?" Tsuruga-san questioned following me as I made my way back to the door.

"I have to go." I said suddenly trying not to face the man.

My first name. Please. Please don't use that.

"Wait Kyoko…" He pulled my arm turning my body towards his. My hair stuck to liquid flowing from my eyes as they gave in to defeat. I felt my body shake as I tried to hold together my emotions. My Corn! He was being erased. My memory was fading because of this man! "Are you crying?" He gasped as he raised a hand to wipe my tears away.

Tears? Am I crying?

"No stop, don't touch me! You'll confuse me more!" The look on his face paralleled how I felt in my heart: confused.

"Did I do something…?" He asked backing a step away gripping his hands tight to his sides. I looked at him; studied him. My heart squeezed and ached. A rush of Goosebumps lined my arms and legs. I didn't understand what feeling was trying to come out. Happiness? Sadness? Anger? My brain scrutinized each emotion before deciding they didn't quite fit.

"I don't know! I don't understand why I feel the way I do right now. I feel confused and lost and scared. My heart burns." I admitted while dropping to my knees in confusion. A look of realization and shock suddenly registered on Ren's face.

"Kyoko…" He dropped to my level scooping the hair out of my face in a compassionate moment.

"Like that! It hurts again!" My heart was ready to explode. I felt like I was dying… so why was Tsuruga-san smiling? He was betraying me. I wasn't sure how, but I felt it. Corn was fading faster now. I tried to recall as many memories as I could, but the image of Tsuruga-san's face kept obscuring the image.

"Does it hurt right here," he motioned to his heart, "so badly that you want to rip it out?" I nodded in pain.

"I want it to go away." I cried only to be pulled into a tight embrace by him. My eyes widened in shock. He was making it worse!

"I wanted it to go away too. I thought it would, but it only got more and more intense." His hands wrapped around my body tighter as I tried to pull away. His smell was overwhelming and made me feel dizzy. "I think of you every day. When I see you I feel lighter than air. My heart squeezes and races and pounds every time I hear you laugh. Kyoko I lo—." I wouldn't let him finish; I couldn't. It would be the end of me.

"No don't say it! Don't say that word," I pulled away and ran to the balcony attached to Ren's apartment. There was one thing I was not allowed to do; and it was that word. That evil word he was about to say.

"I need to say it! I can't hold it in anymore! That pain you're feeling: I feel it every day!" I turned in shock watching the actor break down.

"I'm sorry! I'm… sorry..." I cried gripping the railing like a lifeline, "That word… It's making Corn disappear. I can't let him disappear."

Smears of mascara ran down both sides of Kyoko's face. Her face was contorted from the crying and distress. I hated every moment of this. She didn't need to be in pain, yet I was the one making her feel this way just because I couldn't take the loneliness that accompanied my love for her. The mentioning of Corn shocked me. I fought back the devious smile that tried to appear.

She's reacting like this not because of "Ren", but because of "Corn". I need to tell her… it's time.

"You're worried about Corn... I understand now. Kyoko I need to tell you a story." I was hesitant to ask this of her, but it seemed like she was willing to listen. Her crying died, but her sniffles remained constant. I took her hand that initially she retracted, but eventually allowed me to guide her over to the couch. We both sat down staring at the ground in front of us.

I began: "This is a story of a lonely Prince who was saved by a beautiful Princess." Kyoko shifted in her seat looking more interested, "The Prince was very sad and was always alone. His parents were wonderful, but," my mind slipped in and out of remembrance as visions from the past fluttered through my mind, "being the King and Queen the boy always felt trapped in the shadow of their greatness." I wanted to grasp Kyoko's hand, but I didn't want to risk losing her attention. "One day, the Prince wandered into the woods to find a beautiful stream filled with life. He thought he could find a friend amongst the fish or birds or small animals living nearby." I paused with a sigh recalling my days of loneliness.

"What happened next?" Kyoko urged me forward; she was entranced by the story—the sparkle in her eyes were apparent. Her sniffles were almost gone as if she had already locked away her previous feelings.

"Well, one day as the Prince stood by this stream a beautiful Princess appeared before him. He had no idea where she came from, but with the first moment he saw her he knew she was special… He knew fate had brought them together." I stopped to look at Kyoko. She seemed relieved.

"I'm happy the Prince and the Princess found each other." She said with a smile.

"Yeah, I am too." I said back with the same smile of relief, "But I'm not done. Let me finish." I inhaled a deep breath then continued the last leg of my story: "From that moment on they told each other stories, their concerns and… their dreams. The prince told her he was no ordinary Prince, but a… Fairy Prince." The look of realization in Kyoko's eyes was painful to see.

"Wait…" Kyoko started in terror, but I couldn't let her object this time.

"He told the Princess his name was Corn."

My heart started to pound as I heard Tsuruga-san say that name: Corn. A thin layer of sweat began to form on my skin as everything around me besides his face became blurry.

"How do you know this story?" I questioned trying to call upon ignorance to consume me.

"Because…" It looked like he had a hard time speaking. "Because… I live it."

My heart sank. Memories of Corn flooded back; the same memories I was afraid of losing. Now, they weighed me down like a curse.

"But Corn was…" My mind couldn't make sense of what was going on. It felt like a puzzle with one last missing piece.

"Corn was me. I am Corn." He looked at me waiting… for something, but what? It was as if he had given me the last puzzle piece to complete the picture. My world started to crumble around me. My vision was hazy and my breathing was quick and deep. Betraying me, my body wouldn't move only shake at the obvious thought running through my mind: Tsuruga-san was Corn. Tsuruga-san was my important person from the past. Tsuruga-san had lied to me. "Kyoko…?" My name registered in my mind and somehow I was able to lift my head even though I felt like the world was spinning.

"Why didn't you tell me?" I squeaked unsure of what else to say.

"I wanted you to keep your outlook of the world—to stay blissfully unaware of the horrors that are uncovered when you lose your belief in magic." He paused taking my hand in his. I tried to pull away, but he held tighter. "But I couldn't do that to you anymore. I needed you to know so you could see me as I truly am." My memories started to run rampant as I thought of all the time I spent with Corn. He was there for me not just in person, but in spirit my whole life. Corn was irreplaceable just like the man sitting in front of me. I looked up and stared into the scared Ren's eyes. Those eyes… how had I not seen it? They were the same eyes as Corn. I knew in that shared moment we had that I loved Tsuruga-san… I loved corn? I wasn't sure who the person sitting in front of me was right now, but it didn't matter. He could have been nameless and yet I would still love him.

"Were you able to achieve you dream?" I smiled at him feeling the pain drain from my heart. In its place a warm feeling took over spreading to every inch of my body. My Corn had grown up after all.

"Yes, I think I have." He smiled the fear and sadness being wiped from his eyes. At that moment, I wasn't sure what overcame me, but I couldn't stop myself from leaning in. My body was overran with desire and needing. My pulse quickened as I slowly inched forward until my lips met his. I heard the clock in Ren's apartment strike midnight with several loud pangs.

I must be dreaming.

My arms encompassed Kyoko's body as I deepened the kiss I was shocked we were sharing. Wasn't she mad? What changed? I lied to her for so long, yet she was still willing to accept me. A stray tear escaped my eye landing on her leg. She pulled away, what I felt was too soon, to look at me.

"Why are you crying?" She questioned trying to wipe the trail of liquid away frantically with her hand. "I don't know what came over me I'm sorry!" She blushed turning away on the couch. I knew her heart was racing just like mine. I started to laugh; what a Kyoko thing for her to do.

"I'm happy." I comforted her. She suddenly looked at me with a serious expression.

"I don't care if you're Corn or Tsuruga-san you both are my irreplaceable people." Her blush remained constant, but she refused to look away from my eyes. My smile remained.

"It's actually Kuon. Hizuri Kuon." I waited knowing eventually she would make the connection. Her expression slowly converted into shock.

"Father!" She cried pulling both her hands to her face. "But then when I was acting out Kuon… it was…" Her face turned a deep shade of red as she tried to scoot off the couch in embarrassment.

"You did a pretty good job." I laughed remembering how she mimicked me so perfectly.

"I'm so sorry! And I was so rude to you… with yourself!" She looked like she was melting.

"It's really okay. You are a wonderful actress Kyoko. And moments like that I see so much potential in you." It looked like she wanted to deny it, but no words came to the surface—her emotions must have been fried at this point. Taking that as my opportunity, I took Kyoko's hands in my own and looked deeply into her eyes: "Kyoko…I love you. I have loved you for so long. And I always want you by my side." I confessed expecting her to run away or hide or completely tune out, but what I received blindsided me. Her face grew happy and the shaking that was tormenting her suddenly faded.

"I've known it for a while. I knew how I felt, but I couldn't let myself feel it. I was in denial for so long. It's why my heart felt empty and hurt when I was around you. For so long I've loved you, but I could never admit it to myself." My face was definitely red and no actor could replicate the surprise I was sure that coated my expression. I went back in for another kiss knowing I needed to express how I felt, as best I could, to her at that very moment.

Thank you for calming the storm within me.

The night carried on with moments of laughter, embarrassment, and surprise as we retold the stories of our lives as openly as we could. Kyoko was accepting of everything and in turn I accepted everything of hers. We were no longer two different entities, but two halves of the same whole journeying through life. Destiny, luck, or maybe even fate had brought us to this moment where our paths would finally cross to create a new freshly paved road. Our midnight confession carried us towards a future filled with happiness and a sense of wholeness. Never again would we be alone.

A/N: Enjoy this oneshot! Originally, I only wrote it for a friend, assuming it would be around 1,000 words, but 3,000 words later it became such a big project that I ended up posting it for others to enjoy as well :) I usually only write Bleach fanfics so this was a new and exciting experience for me.