Moments

What is love? Some may say a silly feeling that makes you go crazy; lose your mind and common sense. Others may consider it as pure happiness of the other's existence. But what if that one person ceased to exist? What then? Would you just let the stupid feeling called love fade away like the waves wipe the footsteps in the sand? Or would it carry on for the rest of eternity, making you suffer by bringing up images of the wonderful times you've spent with that significant other? The second one for sure. These kinds of thoughts have been crossing my mind a lot lately. I am simply torturing myself as I can't face the fact that there's nothing else I can do…

'Boo, you coming, mate?', Harry peeped into my room and frowned. He looked around and then focused his gaze upon me. 'Lou, you shouldn't do that to yourself, you know. She'll get better, I know she will.', he came in and patted my shoulder. I could see the pity in his eyes. Not that I was surprised. I've been getting a lot of similar looks these days. I'm sure the very sight of me was depressing.

'Yeah', I tried my best to make the corners of my mouth lift upwards. 'I'll be right down. Give me a few minutes.' he nodded, walked to the door and looked at me once more before closing it.

I slowly got up and headed towards the restroom. I stared at myself in the mirror. The lack of sleep was clearly showing. My eyes looked as if they had sunk deeper into their orbits, leaving me wide-eyed. I spilt some water on my face in attempt to freshen up and as I looked up at my reflection again, my mind decided to take me elsewhere.

3 months ago

She was so peaceful. Yeah, that was the exact word for her at this very moment. Peaceful. I watched her chest going up and down as she was taking deep breaths in her sleep. She was lying next to me, her knees bent, her arms under the pillow, supporting her pretty little head. It was as if I had a little angel napping in my room. And what an angel she was. Her chestnut brown hair was scattered all over her pillow like a silky waterfall, her eyes were hidden now under their tender covers but I knew exactly what their colour was – a mixture of the brightest green I've ever seen and little amber buds. Her skin – so fine and delicate. Claire. She was my fragile flower and I wouldn't let anyone pluck it. I didn't care what I would have to do.

'Stop staring. It's getting weird.', she mumbled in her pillow.

'Never!', I breathed out and she quickly took her pillow and covered her face with it. 'No! That's not fair!', I grabbed it and tried to take it away but she was clutching it too sternly. 'Let it go, Claire', I begged her whilst her laugh resounded in my ears.

'Make me!', she twisted her whole body to the other side of the bed, further away from me. I stood up, went around the bed and started tickling her. My trembling hands touched her whole body: from her slender waist to her toes. She was trying to fight me but we both knew that was impossible. Finally, she waved the white flag (well, not in its full meaning) by throwing the pillow in my face. 'Ha!'

'Mrs. Tomlinson you should treat your man better!', I looked at her now when the sunbeams were brushing lightly against her skin, and thus making her even more beautiful. She gave me a big smile, and then slowly got close to me. We were only a heartbeat away. I could hear hers but I remained ignorant of mine. She stared at my lips, lifted up her finger and ran it along them, her own opened slightly. A few moments later, her lips were caressing my neck, going up to my ear. She was driving me insane. I wanted to grab her and hold her as tight to my body as possible.

'Oh, should I?' at first I didn't grasp the meaning of her words as my mind was in a state of delirium. I couldn't bare this any longer. I had to kiss her or I was going to explode into a billion tiny pieces of a man hopelessly in love. She chuckled as I placed both my hands on her head, our eyes met for a second and then I kissed her. Our tongues touched at first lightly, then pressed harder, each trying to bring pleasure to the other. I slowly ran my fingers through her long hair as my heart was pounding in my chest. And when it was, alas too soon, over, I took a deep breath and rested my forehead on hers.

'You should.' I gave her the answer at last. 'Or else I'd have to repeat the same process over, and over, and over… again!', I smiled cheekily.