Disclaimer: I do not own the Pevensie children or any other traditional characters. I especially do not own Narnia itself - that belongs to CS Lewis. This is just for pure fun; I am not making any money off of it.
Disclaimer II: Some aspects may resemble other stories, but it is not intentional if they do. I've simply read a thousand stories and they're floating in my subconscious state. So iff I copied you, it was inadvertent, and I apologize to you.
Disclaimer III: I ask that no one steals any of the plot ideas in this story. Again, if you would like to use them, please message me first. Thank you.
Rating: K - no adult themes but contains the canon character deaths. Intended for ages 5+.
Time Period: Jumps from LWW to PC to post Last Battle. Imagine character ages as you wish.
Pre-Reading Notes: Book-verse, but has some movie scenes mentioned. NOT AU, contains the canon deaths of Peter, Edmund, and Lucy. The idea for this came from a few things mixed together, as well as the fact that there needs to be more Susan fictions out there. So, I guess, just read and review, tell me what you thought!
Susan hardly believed.
She didn't believe Lucy when she claimed to have found a magical land and a faun named Tumnus in the wardrobe.
She didn't believe she was standing in Narnia, even with the snow falling gently and the wardrobe door visible behind her. It's only a dream, she told herself.
She didn't believe they were the Four, the chosen Kings and Queens who would defeat the White Witch and sit at Cair Paravel to rule over Narnia.
She didn't believe that Aslan would be able to work them out of this mess - to save Edmund, to bring them all safely home.
She didn't believe that Peter could lead an army to victory against a Witch who had kept Aslan Himself out for nearly a hundred years.
She didn't believe it was really Him, really Aslan that stood before her, alive again - she told herself it was a ghost, a mirage or hallucination.
She briefly believed, for the period that the Four reigned over Narnia, bringing peace and prosperity to the land and all lands beyond. She briefly believed her siblings, who had grown into young adults and were now wise rulers.
"There's nothing that can't be fixed," Lucy often said. With her cordial, she healed many. With the help of Aslan, she gave hope to the kingdom. With her bright personality, she made everyone's day better. There was nothing that couldn't be fixed.
"If I can help one person," said Edmund, "My life would be worth it." By breaking the wand, he helped Peter's army. By becoming a judge, he prevented many quarrels and saved many from unfair treatment. By joining with King Lune of Archenland, he helped prevent the Calormene army from invading a close ally and helped prevent Susan from being Rabadash's slave. He helped more than one person. And it was all worth it.
"It's better to break someone's leg than to break someone's heart," Peter said, from experience. He knew it was true, when Aslan took Edmund's spot on the stone table, willing to die than to see His son die. He knew it was true, when Edmund lay dying on the battlefield. Lucy had healed him, Edmund's expression was blank, but when Peter hugged and simply said, "I'm sorry," Edmund was flooded with relief. He knew it was better to break someone's leg than to break someone's heart, for the heart is not guaranteed to heal.
She didn't believe, when they fell back out of the wardrobe and back into old England, where they were no more than four ordinary children, that their experience hadn't been a dream - but she couldn't be sure.
She didn't believe that they would ever go back, and was beginning to be sure it had been a dream, when the Four arrived in Narnia, 1300 years after their reign.
She didn't believe Lucy had seen Aslan up on the ridge, and that He had wanted them to follow Him.
She briefly believed, when Aslan had breathed on her and kindly asked, "Is all well?" She had looked at His beautiful face and said, "Yes, Aslan, all is well."
She didn't believe herself though, for when He had told her and Peter that they would not return, all was not well.
She didn't believe that it had existed at all, and soon went to her English ways of boys and parties and clothes. She didn't believe her siblings' advice, to trust Aslan.
She couldn't believe that this could happen to her. She couldn't believe that all her family was gone - mum, dad, Peter, Edmund, Lucy, and even cousin Eustace. She refused to believe it, and told herself, It's only a dream.
But it wasn't a dream. She had been pestered by Aunt Alberta and Uncle Harold to attend the funeral. She hadn't, though. She had been told by her friends to go through six boxes in the corner of her apartment, containing her family's things. She hadn't, though. She had been asked by her husband to come to Church on Sundays. She hadn't, though, with the excuse, "I refuse to believe in such nonsense."
Finally, many long years after the train accident - no, the dream, Susan reminded herself - she caved and went to Church on Easter morning. "But only for our daughter," she told her husband. She had tried to block all that was happening from her mind, but when the priest said, "All is well for those who believe," Susan couldn't bear it anymore. She politely excused herself to the restroom only to drive home. Tearing open the seal that held those boxes shut for so long, she sobbed as she went through the things.
Susan found a small wooden Lion in Lucy's box, which she recognized almost immediately. Lucy had carried this everywhere and often dropped it, so she would sneak into Father's room, find some SuperGlue, and repair it. "I can't fix this, though. You're gone, and nothing can change that."
In Edmund's box, she found his acceptance letter to the law program at Oxford University. Mother and Father had discussed it with him, and said it would be impractical to pay for such an education. Edmund had begged to join the army, saying the money he'd receive would help pay tuition, and he'd be helping England at the same time. "You helped everyone, but you can't help me now."
Peter wasn't one who held on to many things, so his box was almost empty. There was, however, a small wrapped present labeled Susan. Even though Susan never visited for her siblings' birthdays, they always thought of her on her own. Susan opened it gently. It was a small golden heart pendant, and she suddenly understood what he had meant, because her own heart felt so heavy with grief.
She didn't believe them until now, but it was too late. Too late for them, but not for herself, Susan realized.
"Aslan, Aslan," she said, "Oh, Aslan, all is not well."
She didn't believe until now, but with Aslan, it is never too late.
~END~