Warning to readers (aka Prologue)
Dear poor unfortunate souls;
Most stories start out is some happy village with happy families, friends or such garbage, and that old played out line "once upon a time… blah blah." however my story Ohhhhh no! Ha ha no such luck. So if you're looking for a fairy tale where there is a hero whose whole goal and reason in life is saving the damsel in distress, then two things need to happen. First you need to get your mind set out of the dark ages and into this century thank you! Secondly I'd advise that you move onto a different book, I hear "Goldie the Happy Goldfish" is a thrilling read.
By now you are all most likely wondering "who is this sarcastic smartass who thinks she has the right to tell us what we well or won't read?" well I'm not going to tell you just yet. However I will tell you a little bit of my history, at least what I can remember. To start out I am an orphan, at least I think so. I was born in a land that lays completely untouched by time, don't ask me how that is possible I could never explain it to you. Alas, waking up in a land not my own and finding the key to my way back is proving to be more difficult then I first imagined it to be. I must warn you once again, this story you insist on reading is about my life which was more than hard and the journey home. "Shit! They found me. Well I wish you luck, Your sure going to need it. I must leave you now but please I beg of you remember that things are never ever what they seem.