A/N: An 11 hour shift at work has turned my brain to mush. I tried to write chapters for both my ongoing stories... but this is apparently all that my hands wanted to type. I hope you find it as cute as I did while writing it. The first time I posted this the formatting went really weird (thanks to my reviewer who alerted me to this, so hopefully this edit has sorted it out!).
"What is that?" Athos glared down at D'Artagnan and Aramis from his position on the steps leading from Treville's office. Both men looked up at him, D'Artagnan grinning and Aramis shrugging slightly. As they averted their attention, the object of Athos' disproval attacked Aramis' leg, shape shifting from a small ball of fur into a four legged animal.
"It's a kitten." D'Artagnan sounded pleased with himself as Aramis winced as the small cat dug it's claws into his calf muscle, intent on climbing up the musketeer's leg. D'Artagnan bent to rescue his friend's leg from the cat as Athos closed his eyes and gave a long suffering sigh.
"I can see that, thank you. Why do you have a kitten?" D'Artagnan looked up at Athos again, the kitten cradled in his arms. The cat swatted at the young man's face, his paw catching him on the nose and Aramis had to work hard to conceal a grin.
"I thought he would make a good mouser for Madame Bonacieux. Her husband has been complaining about mice ruining his material. There was a man at the market selling them, he said he would have to drown them if no one bought them."
"Yes, but D'Artagnan." Athos sighed again after the young man finished his explanation. The kitten wriggled free from his grip and fell to the floor, letting out a pitiful meow as it landed on his feet, nudging it's head against Aramis' knee. "Why is the kitten here, not with Madame Bonacieux?"
"It's a kitten, Athos." D'Artagnan's tone suggested that Athos was asking a stupid question.
"Well that explains everything." Athos grumbled as he walked down the steps towards his two friends. Aramis had given in to the nudges of the small kitten and the animal was now rolling on his back as the musketeer scratched its stomach. "Where is Porthos?" Aramis' head shot up, his face cracking into an evil grin.
"It turns out that our esteemed friend is scared of cats!" His voice was gleeful as he revealed a weakness of their sturdy friend. "He took one look at Mittens and suddenly had urgent business on the other side of Paris!"
"Mittens?" Athos raised an eyebrow.
"Well, she has to have a name!" D'Artagnan defended the name choice. "And look, it looks like she is wearing mittens." He pointed out the cat's white paws, which did indeed make it look as though the cat was wearing a glove on each foot. The rest of the kitten was ginger, the light red fur glinting in the Parisian sunlight.
"D'Artagnan." Athos gritted his teeth. "Please tell me that Constance named it." The silence told him otherwise as D'Artagnan suddenly averted his attention from Athos to the cat, avoiding the eyes of his friend. "When will Mittens," he grimaced as he used the cats name, "be allowing us to get on with our work?"
"She ripped up the material that Monsieur Bonacieux was using to make a dress for an important client." D'Artagnan admitted. "And she is too young to be left on her own. I promised Constance I would look after her."
"Ouch!" Athos grunted as the small bundle of fur launched itself from Aramis' hands to his thigh. Thoroughly impressed with her new playmate, Mittens quickly scrambled up onto Athos' shoulder, batting her paws at the man's hat. Over balancing, the kitten toppled and Athos' quick reflexes caught the mischievous animal as it fell. Mitten's stared up at the man, quiet for a moment.
"She likes you." D'Artagnan declared, a moment before the kitten wriggled, determined to climb up Athos' arm to reach the hat she obviously thought would make a great toy.
"I'm thrilled." Athos' voice held a heavy amount of sarcasm.
"Just hold her for a moment." D'Artagnan jumped to his feet. "I need to get her some milk!" The young man was running away from Athos and Aramis and did not here the musketeer's annoyed protest.
"D'Artagnan!" The kitten had jumped from Athos' hands and landed on his shoulder, digging his claws into his shoulder. "Why are you looking so smug." He glared at Aramis, who was still sitting on the floor. Aramis simply shrugged as Athos tried his hardest to extract the kitten from his hair. "I know what your thinking, and I really do not think it would be a good idea to tease Porthos about this." Athos warned and Aramis simply shrugged again, smirking slightly. The kitten, untangling itself from Athos' hair, successfully knocked his musketeer's hat to the ground and gleefully lept down on top of it, worrying the feather decorating the side.
'She seems to like feathers." Aramis commented, gesturing to the feather on his own hat, which had most definitely seen better days. Athos cast his eye about for something to distract the cat and allow him to rescue his hat and his eye fell upon a bundle of chicken's feathers outside the doors to the kitchens. Leaving Mittens under the watchful eye of Aramis, he slid across the courtyard to pick up a couple of them.
Dangling them just out of reach of the kitten, Athos caught her attention easily and Mittens immediately began to stalk the new toy, attempting to stealthily hide behind the hat she had been worrying. As she crept towards the feathers, Aramis took the opportunity to rescue Athos' hat, and as Athos raised his head to thank his friend the kitten launched itself at the feathers. Unfortunately for Athos, the young cat's aim was not amazing and, to Aramis' delight, she landed, claws outstretched and teeth bared, on Athos' hand. Grumbling, the musketeer pulled his hand away from the cat, who assumed that this was a continuation of the game and gave chase.
"I am going to kill D'Artagnan." Athos muttered as he picked up the feathers with his other hand in an attempt to stop the kitten from trying to kill his fingers. Mitten's, happily chewing on his little finger, paid no attention whatsoever to his attempts. "Aramis!"
"Don't whine Athos, it doesn't become you." Aramis responded to his friend's plea for aid. "She is just playing with you."
"It hurts!" Aramis laughed outright at Athos' complaint.
"Somehow I think you have endured worse pain Athos." The stoic man glared at the smiling musketeer, but before he could retort, D'Artagnan returned, placing a small saucer of milk down on the ground between the two men. The kitten abandoned Atho's finger and bounded over to the milk. She showed obvious interest in the food, sniffing at it and mewing as the men watched.
"She should be hungry, why will she not drink?" D'Artagnan asked. Aramis shrugged, content just to watch but Athos opened his mouth to answer. Before he could utter a sound, Mittens lifted both paws and splashed them down in the milk, upsetting the saucer and covering herself in the white liquid. She stopped in surprise, turning a mournful face to Athos as milk dripped from her fur. Absentmindedly, the man reached out a hand to comfort the distressed kitten.
"She probably doesn't know how to feed herself." He held out the saucer to D'Artagnan. "Get some more. You'll have to teach her."
"Me?" D'Artagnan looked worried.
"Well I think you're the reason she is here. Go on." D'Artagnan disappeared again and Athos pulled his scarf from around his neck, using it to dry the worst of the milk from the kitten. "I think you had better go and find Porthos." He addressed Aramis, before thinking better of it when the man started grinning again. "On second thoughts, perhaps we will wait till he comes back. I-"
"Aramis!" Captain Treville appeared above the two of them on the same set of steps that Athos had first noticed the kitten from earlier. "I need you to – What is that?"
"D'Artagnan's kitten sir." Athos did not miss a beat.
"Why does D'Artagnan have a kitten?" Treville scowled.
"I'm not entirely sure, sir." Athos shrugged, wincing as Mittens recovered from her soaking and began her journey up the side of his leg again. Picking her up, he handed her to Aramis as the captain shook his head. Treville had long since given up questioning the four men, preferring to turn a blind eye to their antics when off duty. The kitten stared up at Aramis, her large eyes innocent, quiet for a few moments before reaching up and tapping the man on his face, her claws tangling in his beard. D'Artagnan arrived at that moment to help a frustrated Aramis to detangle the worried kitten. Athos chuckled at his friends distress.
"Do not whine, Aramis, it doesn't become you." Aramis made a particularly ungentlemanly hand gesture towards his friend as D'Artagnan pulled the restless kitten into his arms. Mittens immediately began to pur.
"Gentlemen." Treville stopped the friendly argument before it began, causing all three men to turn and face him. The authority in his voice even had little Mittens quiet for a few seconds, before the kitten decided that the string on D'Artagnan's shirt was interesting enough to play with and wriggled free once more. "Aramis, I need you and Porthos… where is Porthos?" The same gleeful smile came over Aramis' face once more and Athos quickly answered for him.
"He had some personal business to take care of across the city."
"Oh." Treville looked mildly surprised. "In that case Aramis, take D'Artagnan with you. I need you to go to the palace and talk with Rodger d'Arville." The captain named the captain of the palace guards. "He wants extra men during the Christmas festivities. Find out how many and for what." Aramis nodded and stood, pulling on his now tattered hat.
"Come on D'Artagnan. Let us pay a visit to the palace. Who knows what we might find." D'Artagnan passed the kitten and the saucer of milk to Athos who protested.
"Hold on, what about the kitten?"
"Orders are orders Athos." Aramis grinned. "Regrettable I know, but I'm sure you'll both be fine." D'Artagnan looked a little worried about leaving the small kitten with the grouchy Athos, but had little say in the matter as Aramis led him out of the musketeer's courtyard.
Athos was left, holding a squirming ball of fluff, staring after the two men with a very annoyed scowl on his face.
Several hours later, Aramis and D'Artagnan had returned to the regiment, only to be informed by Treville that Athos had returned to his rooms. The captain made no mention of the kitten; only accepted the news the two men had to give him and sent them on their way. Aramis and D'Artagnan, the latter more than a little concerned for the fate of his landlady's kitten, hurried to the rooms of their friend, only a few streets away.
Athos didn't answer the door, but Aramis was able to break in with an ease that made D'Artagnan expect the man had done so a fair few times before. Aramis led the way through the short, narrow corridor to the second of the two rooms that made up Athos' house: the kitchen. The musketeer stopped abruptly in the doorway and D'Artagnan had to stand on his tiptoes to peer over Aramis' shoulder to see what had caused him to stop. Sitting on the floor underneath the window, Athos was sleeping. His eyes were close and his head had fallen back against the wall. His hands were badly scratched, a few of the deeper cuts still bleeding, but his fingers were twined protectively through the short orange fur of the tiny kitten, curled up asleep in his lap.
Backing out of the room, Aramis carefully pulled the door closed, placing a finger to his lips as he ushered D'Artagnan out of Athos' apartment. As he locked the door and they found themselves back on the streets, he turned to the young man.
"Do you think Madame Bonacieux will mind if we do not return the kitten this evening?"