Disclaimer: I do not own nor profit from the characters of Twilight. The Proxy Imprint: Part One: Chapter One:
A/N: I don't have a beta for this story so I apologise ahead of time for any errors you might find. Second note: I just wanted to fix this freakish imprint and hopefully undo the craziness of it all and still find happiness for both Q/C.
Claire
Lying on my back I stared at the ceiling above me. Three days. Three days until I started my Senior year of High School. Feelings of excitement, fear, anticipation and gloom twisted and burned in the center of my stomach. It felt like I was suffocating. Each breath I took was ragged and felt as if I was dying a slow death. With each passing day that I drew closer to my eighteenth birthday I felt like I was slowly emerging into a deep cesspool of apprehension. Most teenagers would be ecstatic about the pending age of freedom as it approached but not me. Unfortunately, I wouldn't ever know the true depths of freedom. My life was already destined to belong to another. I was told at an early age that I was among a rare few who were blessed to be imprinted with a wolf pack member. Now at ten years old that sounds pretty cool but at seventeen it lacks the luster it once did. I wanted to go out into the world and see and revel in life's experiences but that wasn't going to happen. No, you see even if my "imprint" decided to no longer phase into a gigantic wolf to help protect our people from the cold ones, I seriously didn't see him as the type to wander the ends of the earth. Quil Ateara was a wonderful man. He came along in my life when I needed an angel the most. My parents loved me but they lacked the skills to raise a child. My mother was often seen at the local bar with a string of different men, while my father would drink himself into a horrible foul mood at home. When my mother managed to come home my father was quick to start slinging out vulgar words about her unfaithful lifestyle. It wouldn't take long before she would fight back with her own hurtful words. Two hot headed people both with a drinking addiction wasn't a match made in heaven. Sadly, my luck didn't last forever. One winter night our house caught fire after parents had fallen asleep in a drunken stupor that kept them from realizing the danger we were all in. I tried to wake them up, I pulled on them and shouted at the top of my lungs but neither of them moved an inch. The smoke filled our small cabin quickly and I knew we were going to die just as I passed out from smoke inhalation. The next day I woke up to find myself in a different room. A room that I often stayed in when Emily got permission from my parents to let me stay over at her house. Sitting up in the bed I began to remember the fire the night before. Tears fell from my eyes as I looked around the room in hopes that my parents were close by. A second later the door creak open and it was Quil who I saw first that fateful day. He explained as best as he could how he got to my house as fast as he could but by the time he got there he had just enough time to get me out of the house before the roof collapsed, causing my parents death. He held me in his arms while I sobbed for hours. My parents weren't the best sort but they were all I had. I was only ten years old and had no clue what would happen now that they were lost to me forever. Two days later, wearing a dress that Emily made me I stood by their graves as Quil held my small hand in his and watched as they lowered each of them into the ground. Emily got permission from the tribal council to keep me at her home. The first few weeks was an adjustment period for me but eventually I settled in nicely. Between Emily's mothering and Quil's constant attention I never lacked for nothing. My connection with Quil helped ease the pain and loss that I feared I would feel forever. He was constantly patient with me, even on my bad days, when I first started to show signs of rebellion. I learned that I had inherited my parents quick temper but fortunately I also realized how to control it before it hurt people innocent bystanders. Quil might have cared for me but he wasn't afraid to punish me when he deemed it was necessary. Emily was considered my legal guardian in the eyes of the law but everyone knew it was Quil who really controlled what I did and where I went. After living there for a few weeks and seeing some things that should have given me or any other child nightmares I learned why I was so important to Quil. It was a surreal moment in my life when I listened to the legends of our people around a campfire where several other members of the secreted wolf pack sat around. As a young child it seemed so incredible and exciting but as I grew older and acknowledged the role I was expected to play when I became an adult, I no longer saw it in the same light. Did I care for Quil? The love I felt for Quil had many layers. The way I saw Kim love Jared wasn't a feeling that I could relate too. I needed Quil and I knew he was a good man but when it came to a sexual longing, I couldn't really explain if I felt anything in that area for him. He never once touched me inappropriately, he didn't really flirt with me and he always kept a safe distance between us if we were ever alone in the same room. So honestly, I couldn't label my feelings of love for him in a mature category. There were was days that I looked at the boys who were in my class and tried like hell to find a connection or even an attraction for just one of them. Nothing. Zilch. No sparks, no desires and definitely no dying need to let any of them to kiss me as many had requested. What was wrong with me? How could I break this chain between us? Why did I even want too? So many questions boggled my brain and most days I was able to maintain a false smile but on days like today, it was much harder to do. Here I was seventeen years old, approaching my Senior year and I realized that I'd never been out on a date, never played spin the bottle with a guy, or any other adolescent passage that every girl I knew endured. It wasn't fair. It felt like my heart was in prison. I couldn't feel anything for anyone except Quil and it was frustrating. Would I never look at a man the way that Bella looked at Jake or hold hands the way Emily often did with Sam? Would Quil and I always have this celibate but tender love for one another? The sound of my phone ringing on the bedstand brought me out of my reverie. Rolling over onto my side I reached out and grabbed the annoying piece of technology and answered it. "Yeah." I sighed heavily. "Hey Claire." Serena Clearwater greeted me. Sitting up in the bed I pushed my frustration aside as I listen attentively to my caller. "Hi Serena." "Are you busy?" She asked. Looking around at my perfectly groomed room I rolled my eyes sarcastically. I knew she couldn't see me acting rudely but I still felt a small amount of guilt. "Not really. What's up?" I forced my voice to sound cheery. "Well, Seth and I just got an emergency situation with a dog and we will be working late. Could you go by the house and check on my kiddos for me?" Naturally whenever any of the pack or prior pack members needed a sitter they called on me. I had the misfortune of being the oldest of the children and being a female was two strikes against me. I loved all of their children but it wasn't exactly my life's calling to play the role of Nanny to them. "Sure." I rolled my eyes for the second time. "Thanks. We will be home as soon as we know the pet is in the safe zone." As much as I admired Seth and Serena's profession as veterinarians I found it annoying that their jobs often kept them at work late. At least once a week I received this exact phone call from one or the other. "Sure." I said before hanging up the phone. Forcing my legs over the side of the bed I scrambled around my room and put together a quick bag of items I would need to occupy me while I sat with Starr and Harrison. Leaving my room I went to the fridge and wrote down a short note letting Emily and Sam know where I was at. Grabbing my keys, bag and purse I left the house. Driving to Seth's house took me normally only ten minutes but today I drove the speed limit and enjoyed the unusual rays of sunlight that pierced through my windshield. My skin tingled from the much needed natural vitamin D and my heart, which had been heavy, was starting to feel lighter. Turning the steering wheel in the direction of the dirt road that led to Seth and Serena's property I was shocked when a rusty pickup truck came barreling down it and seemed to be driven by a madman. Honking my horn as I swerved to the side of the road to prevent it from striking my small car I caught a mere glimpse of the driver. It was an older man that I didn't recognize. He continued to barrel down the road like a bat outta hell. A few minutes later I arrived in front of the house. Stepping out of my car I was attacked by a pair of arms around my hips before I could fully close my car door. Laughing I looked down at Harrison Clearwater who had the largest brown eyes I'd ever seen on kid's face. My heart melted instantly as I scuffed his moppy hair. "Hey Harrison." "You made it. I was so scared I would be alone with Starr tonight." Harrison stuck out his tongue, making a disgusted face at the thought of being babysitted by his ten year old sister. "Haha. It's not that bad." I said as we walked side by side up to his house. "Uh, come on it's Starr we are talking about. If she isn't on her phone talking to one of her brainless friends then she is chasing me around the house threatening to bury me out back." Harrison exclaimed as we entered his home. The Clearwater siblings weren't exactly keen on one another. Out of all the children I watched, these two gave the true definition to sibling rivalry. Both wanted to be the best at everything and felt the other was the most annoying person on earth. It was funny on most days but today I felt a headache in the not so far off distance from the lack of sleep of the past two nights and I wasn't in the mood for it. "Where is Starr?" I asked as I put my stuff on the kitchen table. "In her room." Harrison replied while making himself a cup of milk. "Be back." I walked down the narrow hallway to the last room on the right. Knocking politely on her door I received no response, so I knocked again and this time much louder. When I didn't hear a peek from her I felt a moment of dread wash over me. Opening the door in a moment of panic I stepped into the room and found the person I needed to see but what I also saw made my already hammering heart race like lightning as my mouth formed a perfect shaped "O". "Shut the door Claire!" Starr screamed furiously at me. Slamming the door behind me I continued to stare in disbelief at her. "What are you doing?" I asked while trying to sound calm outwardly. Starr who is only ten years old stood in front of her wall length mirror wearing her mother's bra over her shirt and a ton of makeup on her face that looked like a circus clowned assisted her with. "Don't laugh at me." She pleaded with a frustrated glare at me. "Okay." I covered my mouth with my hands to prevent the laughter that was threatening to spill out at any moment. "I know I look silly and I also know that I'm not allowed in Mommy's makeup or clothes but...well..." Starr scrunch her lips together and push it to the side as she stared down at the floor. I sensed she was trying to find the best way to communicate to me why a girl who normally didn't dare break rules was breaking several of them. "Are you playing pretend?" I offered a possible solution. "Yes and no. You see I ...well...I really like this guy and he is a couple of years older than me and he likes a girl who wears this." She pointed to the bra and then her face. "Who is this older guy?" I asked curiously. "I'm not going to tell you about him." Starr huffed. "Okay. Fine. But you better put all of this back and get cleaned up before your parents get home." I warned her. "Alright. Don't tell Harrison. He will tell Mommy." She pleaded. "Hurry." I closed the door behind me as I made my way back to the kitchen where I found Harrison going through my bag. "Hey stooge what do you think you are doing?" Harrison jumped slightly causing his feet to nearly c0me off the floor from fright. I laughed softly despite the look of guilt that covered his adorable seven year old face. As I had said a million times before the Clearwater kids were the most challenging children to watch. They were far too curious and one day I suspected that natural curiosity would land them in deep water. "Sorry." Harrison mumbled as he took a shaky step back from the table. "It's rude to go through other people's things." I reminded him. "I know. I just heard your phone ringing and I thought I would take a look at it but then I saw you had other things in your bag." He explained nervously. "Oh I got a call." I opened my bag and retrieved my phone. I looked at the missed call. It was from Quil. I then noticed he also left me a voice mail along with a text message. Something was wrong. He never called and texted unless there was pending danger near the reservation. The danger was rare but every once in awhile a lone vampire would make it's way through our area. Unlike me none of the other children knew about the members of the pack and their special gift of phasing into an enormous sized wolf or the truth behind the legends of the cold ones. Their parents didn't want to steal their innocence until it was absolutely necessary. I knew they hoped that none of their children had to experience the calling in their lifetime. "Did you look at my phone?" I asked him with a warning glare. "No." He shook his head adamantly. "Harrison it's not nice to lie." I warned him. "I know." Harrison rocked on the heel of his shoes as he looked around the room. "Go watch television. I will be in there in a second." I ordered. He raced out of the room without another word spoken. I suspected he read my text message and it must have frightened him somehow. Looking at the message I realized why he wore a guilty look. Something is going down. The council is asking us for an emergency meeting. Stay 0n the reservation and don't go into Forks. The hairs on the back of my neck rose as I reread it again in hopes of depicting any special meaning behind his cryptic message. Normally he would specify the danger. The council rarely called for an emergency meeting. What in the world was going on now? Heading into the living room I sat next to Harrison and watched television with him. A half an hour later Starr joined us, looking like the ten year old girl I was accustom to. I flashed her an understanding smile but instead of returning one to me she sat down in the chair away from us and kept her eyes locked on the screen. Starr's temper was legendary. It was easy to see why her father nicknamed her Little Leigh. They both were notorious for being hot headed and brazen as hell. Starr didn't play games with your head. She vocalized her fears and anger with such ease I often wondered if there was a much older soul in that tiny body. Closing my eyes I allowed myself to doze off for a little while until Harrison nudged me with his bony elbow. "What's wrong?" I sat up quickly, too quickly, I saw little black dots. "Dad and Mom are home." He explained as he glanced at the large bay window. I saw the lights from their vehicle as they pulled up. Wiping the slobber from the corner of my mouth I yawned as I stood up. Stretching my arms above my head I rolled my neck side to side and loosen up my sore muscles. The small nap helped keep the headache at bay but I suspected if I didn't get home soon and sleep it would hit me like a sledgehammer very soon. Serena walked into the house looking as exhausted as I felt. "Thank you." She smiled warmly at me. "No problem." I walked into the kitchen and began to retrieve my things while listening to Harrison tell his mother what he expected for dinner tonight. I felt a smidge guilty for not cooking for them but neither mentioned being hungry and my appetite was decreasing due to the warm summer. In the winter time I ate like a bear preparing for hibernation. "Where is Dad?" Harrison asked. "He ...he is visiting with Jacob Black." Serena replied with a half smile as she leaned down and kissed the top of her son's head. "Oh." Harrison seemed appeased with her answer and took back off into the living room to watch his shows. "Where is Starr?" Serena asked as she passed me and headed straight to the fridge. "She was watching television with us earlier." I frowned. I wondered if she snuck out on me while I took a cat nap? "I'm here." Starr announced as she walked past me and wrapped her arms around her mother's waist. I felt a moment of jealousy fill my heart. Starr adored her mother and it was easy to see that Serena loved them in return. They shared a mother/daughter bond that I wasn't blessed with. "Where are you going?" Serena asked as I made my way to the front door. "Going over to Quil's." I mumbled. "Oh. How are things going with you two?" She asked curiously. Although Serena wasn't from this area nor a pure blood Quileute, Seth was given permission to tell her about our secretive legends and although the discovery of the wolves and vampires true existence scared her half to death she also accepted it in stride. A year after she married Seth he ask permission to stop phasing and it was of course granted to him. There hadn't been any real threat from the cold ones since Isabella Swan broke off all ties with the Cullen Coven. Yeah, that was one hell of a story to learn. It was her romance with the one called Edward that caused the chain reaction and soon there was several young men in LaPush changing overnight into hunky young men. People often wondered if they'd started a gang and some people even rumored they were selling drugs. It was ironic to think that those same people didn't know how lucky they were that these young men did what they did or most of them would have been vamp food before now. Leaving the Clearwater house I drove straight to Quil's house. I suspected something serious was up and I couldn't shake this uneasy feeling I had ever since I received his text message. When I arrived at his bachelor pad I was surprised to see his ford pickup truck parked in front of the house. Why hadn't he called me to let me know the meeting was over? Was there even a meeting at all? Maybe he ran over instead of driving. I really needed to stop jumping to conclusions until I got all the facts. It was one of my oh so long list of flaws. A low roar of thunder rolled over my head and small pellets of rain began to pelt my delicate skin as I ran up to the house. Summer storms were the worst kind. With all the humidity in the air you just didn't know what to expect. Wiping away the rain from my face I opened the door and called out for Quil. I didn't want to risk the chance he was naked again. That was one of the most awkward moments of my life seeing Quil dancing to the radio while he was in the nude. Let's just say after the shock wore off I couldn't stop laughing. "Quil! Are you here?" I called , stepping into the living room. The sound of his bedroom door opening and closing made my earlier worries intensify. So he was here which meant he should have called me before now. Taking a deep breath I tried to reel in my temper. Quil was my imprint and my best friend but he also had a right to a life of his own. Emily lectured me on more than one occasion about my selfish behavior with Quil. I enjoyed making him jump at my every whim and if he hesitated I had the bad habit of sulking or worse throwing a tantrum like a five year old. I was nowhere near as bad as when I was a child but even at a teenage state I found myself slipping back into that mode. Quil didn't lecture me quite as severely as Emily had but he did put me in my place and made me feel just awful. "Hey. Are you okay?" Quil asked as he ran his hands through his damp hair and flashed me a warm smile that made my earlier fears subside instantaneously. "I'm fine, the question is, are you?" I sighed. "I'm the same as before." He chuckled. "Good." A sudden need to be near him consumed me. Like I seen Starr do earlier I threw my arms around him. He wrapped his arms around me in return. My fears disappeared and my heart was filled with a warmth that only Quil could produce. "Are you sure you're okay?" Quil asked as he kissed the top of my head. "Yeah." I mumbled against his chest. "I was going to call you after I got out the shower." He explained for his tardiness of informing me what was going on exactly. "Why the sudden need for an emergency meeting?" I asked as I pulled my head back just enough to look up at him. My arms continued to hold onto him as if something inside of me feared if I removed them he would suddenly dissolved into midair. "It's some crazy stuff let me tell you." His eyes sparkled and I didn't pick up on any dire danger amongst us, which helped me relax in his embrace. Before he could say another word on the matter I heard another door open and close. An acute feeling of dread pummeled my heart. Who else was here? Why hadn't Quil mentioned we weren't alone when I first arrived? A voice in my head screamed at me to not turn around. An almost primal fear catapult straight through my heart when I looked back up at Quil and saw something in his eyes that warned me that he too wasn't pleased with the intruder. Using every ounce of strength I could muster I did the hardest thing in my life and pulled away from his secure embrace, slowly pivoted around to see who was with us. I'm not sure what I expected to see or who for that matter but I felt like my once happy but messed up world suddenly whisked upside down. A young man close to my own age stared at me with the same consternation as myself. I heard an inauspicious growl erupted from Quil as the tall, lean stranger crumpled to his knees. Our eyes locked and my heart trembled until I feared it was going to explode out of my chest. I saw something flicker in his eyes and like myself he seemed frighten and dumbstruck by the attraction that was burning like flames between us. "OH HELL NO!" Quil shouted as he grabbed my upper arms and yanked me away, putting distance between me and the stranger. I heard a moan escape from my throat as I gulped hard trying to suck in air. My chest ached, my lungs burn as if it were in need of oxygen and something deep within my soul told me that this man, this stranger was the air I needed to breathe. "What's wrong with me..." I said out loud, not sure to who . "I...need...to...touch..." The stranger whimpered as he extended his arms out toward me but Quil stood between us, blocking any possible contact. "NO! This can't be! No!" Quil's hands curled up into fists by his side and I watched as he went into attack mode. Would he phase into wolf and harm the stranger? I couldn't let that happen, I didn't know why but something buried within the walls of my heart jumped to life and suddenly it was like an invisible rope tied me to the mystery man. If he pulled at it, I wouldn't be able to fight it or him.I knew somehow in the far depths of my mind that this was somehow connected to the supernatural world that also held me captive to Quil's life and love. "What is this?" The man asked as tears welled up in his beautiful soft brown eyes. "This can't be happening! It's fucking impossible!" Quil roared with such an intensity that it scared me to the core. The next thing I knew my body stopped trembling but then everything suddenly went dark seconds before I felt my body falling forward into a pair of strapping arms. XXX
Luckily for me neither of my parents took out their anger on me but they did neglect my normal needs. Emily, my mother's cousin, would come by several times a week and give me a bath along with a good meal. Whenever I was sick it was Emily or Quil who made sure I was seen by a doctor. Between the two of them I didn't starve to death or die from an illness that could've been prevented.
Yes.
Did I respect him?
Yes.
Did I love him?
I didn't know how to answer that question.