A kind of long Cade one-shot. Set after "Crazy Ponnie" I've never done anything with centered Cat characterization before so I'm getting my feet wet since I love Cade. :)
I do not own the Victorious characters.
"So obviously you know who this is since you managed to find my number- unless you're some type of stalker. Evidently I am not here or you're not worth the tap of a green button. You should go with the second. If I am feeling generous I might call you, but don't get your hopes up. I guess you can leave a message after the unoriginal beep that I can't unfortunately change." The harsh voice is cut off and followed with a short beep.
"Hiya Jade," Cat whispers,eyes downcast to the bubble gum pink polish on her toes. "I just...wanted to see how you were doing. It's been awhile..." A month, to be exact. A month without her Jadey, the girl she smiled at when she told mean jokes she didn't understand, or shooed away her scary monsters under her bed. And it's not like they have school to be forced to encounter some form of physical contact. This is the worst summer vacation ever."Please call me back." her tone trails off in a giggle as she hangs up the phone, trying to push away the knowledge that it won't ever happen. Things are always better when she laughs, or smiles, or plays with her stuffed animals. Fun never hates you; it's the people that do and Cat doesn't like being sad. Just the thought of it makes her shiver.
She's bored as all hay right now. Like seriously; hay must be boring. Lying around the farm all by itself, not saying a word. They sit there, lifeless, until horses eat them and their poor families. That makes Cat sad. She remembers what it's like dreaming about being eaten; a frown twists her face at the thought of it. It's all okay because she has her friends to cheer up.
With a smile she taps Tori's name from her phone and waits to hear a cheerful "Hey, Cat"
"Hi. Tor! What are you doing tonight? Wanna get some sushi at Nozu?"
"Sorry honey, I'm working out with my mom and this is the only night she's free." Cat doesn't see her friend but she could hear the disappointment in her tone and practically sees the frown on her face. The ginger- whose hair is now represented by a thick red wig because of Jade's snipping- makes one of her own.
"Oh, oh it's okay," she says after a slight pause, trying to compose herself with a light laugh. "Go have fun with Mommy. Work those abs!" With a reassuring giggle Cat hangs up the phone, but sighs when the phone is disconnected. Just because she is sad and bored, doesn't mean Tori should feel guilty about it. And she would too, because she is a loving friend who tries to do everything in her power to make sure things are okay. That's how they gotten so close; because they both have that goal.
And it comes to her, bright and fast like a pretty shooting star. She needs to make Jade happy again. It's obvious that she isn't interested in Cat at this moment but that doesn't mean she doesn't like other things, right? Her Jadey is...different from her and prefers the darkness of things, while Cat adores the fluff and shine. Although it is hard for Cat to understand, like Math or the obsession of eyebrows, the peculiarity of her friend always had her drawn to the brunette. Jade is like a fun mystery movie, mixed with a little horror, a bit of comedy- most of the jokes being hard to understand- and, of course, a musical. She wants to watch her movie again.
With a triumphant smile she dials Robbie's number and waits for his greeting.
"Hello?"
"Hi Robbie, can you do me a favor?"
"Sure, sure, anything!" he responds quickly, his words jumbled in one breath.
"Kay, kay, so this is what I need..."
It's dark in here, Cat muses with a light giggle, twirling the synthetic ends of her hair that can't be seen in the blackened area. Cat is usually afraid of the dark but with Andre's soothing voice from behind, reassuring her, she knows she's safe. And besides, this is all for Jade after all.
"Are we there yet?" she calls, growing a bit impatient in the cramped position she's in. She's small but not a baby and her legs are falling asleep under her bottom.
"Yeah we are, little red."
She feels the wheels from under her curb to a stop, her ride now parked as a doorbell is rung. She liked the ride, the lightness of the ground. It was almost like her own roller-coaster, Andre directing the twists and turns, some speeds faster than others. Rollercoasters are always fun but she can't go to most amusement parks because her brothers has an icky habit of peeing on clowns. She reminds herself to thank Andre for giving her a little gift of her own.
Cat naturally freezes when she hears the ice of her voice, sharp and indifferent, that manages to cut deep inside her victim. Even when she isn't annoyed, or even happy- the closest thing that Jade can call that- there is always a shadow of irritation in her tone. Cat never understood that; if something makes you happy, shouldn't you smile and laugh? When she watches Peter Pan, or Sesame Street, or sings, she's leaping with smiles and giggles. But that's the difference between she and Jade. Jade's mind is a crazy jungle-jim that's too dangerous for Cat to play in, but the mischief in her tries to in spite of that, falling off the obstacle course, bruising, just to get back up and try again with a loopy smile. She'll get bigger, she'll get stronger, and eventually she'll master the stigma of that unknown place that is Jade's mind.
"What the hell is all this?" she hears a brisk question.
"Special delivery," goes Andre's happy reply.
"I didn't order anything."
Cat's squirming in her seat, ready to burst, topple out of the lid like fuzz in a shaken soda. Ooh she wants to see Jade's expression, the look of awe wave through her stilled facial features, watch the light flicker in her eyes. Jadey always had pretty eyes.
"Oh this is special, alright" Robbie pitches in from her right, his tone amused as of Andre's, well aware of the secret Jade will soon discover.
She could feel the goth's impatience, her own beginning to inundate. She can't wait to hear her cue, surprise, and she could pop out of this cocoon and properly give Jade the gifts she deserves. Smile and laugh with her like they use to, have proper slumber parties- though all of the times Jade has spent the night at her house are for emergency reasons- fumigation of icky bugs. She's softly squealing thinking about it.
"Surprise!"
The small screws are gone from the top above her, and the dark ceiling hits her first. She quickly adjusts to the light, remembering why she's here, sitting in a box, cramped in a tiny space. The top disappears and fresh air hits her lungs, rekindling her hyper behavior, flowing through her tiny frame, bouncing her out of the box with an elongated giggle. "Surprise!" she smiles wider, speaking with her arms as she laughs to herself.
She wants to see the smile, the familiar dark laugh, the eye brow raise of appreciation, but all she is granted with is a widening eye and huge scowl. "What the-"
"Now Jade-" Andre tries to intervene but her old friend is having nothing of it.
"No, you come here with this big ass box and a cart filled with lord knows what," she hisses at Cat's gifts, causing the tiny girl to frown. "And then you have this child trapped in there and you expect me to be okay?"
"I wanted to say hi..." She quickly sucks her lips back into her mouth, regretting her words, wishing she could control the little impulses in her head. Then it occurs to her if she has some sort of lock on her thoughts then she wouldn't have gone all out to do this for Jade, and she still doesn't regret it. She just wish Jade could see through that and not give her such a mean glare.
"If I wanted to say hi I would've answered the phone, or went to your house."
She tries to speak but words seem to be strangled and trapped in her throat, scurried and withered by the narrowed gaze of her ex-friend. Maybe it's the blue eyes, she thinks. When Jade is infuriated, let's say with Tori, they grow wide with fury and passion. But when she's upset, or genuinely hurt- Cat realizes- they remain calm, eerily cold, almost still like ice and they stare trying to eliminate any threat with its peril.
After a pause Andre moves in with confidence, conversing with Jade and explaining Cat's emotions with pretty words. With a bewildering eye she watches her ex-friend's change from its furious expression, to contemplation, until it trails to her usual indifference. She wonders how he finds the right words to express emotions, how people do it in general. It's hard to give straightforward answers for the jumbled discordance of her brain. Anything other than bliss and vibrant colors are difficult for Cat to grasp, so therefore she keeps on that smile, continue that laugh, even if she doesn't exactly feel the happiness she displays. She does it because it's easier for her to understand. Love and happiness are pure and one dimensional.
"Whatever," Cat catches the last of the conversation, and Jade walks away, heading toward her staircase while the two boys follow. They carry the contents of Jade's gifts up the dark stairs while the ginger squeals with each step, anxious for the goth to see the unique presents she has for her. No matter how mean someone could be, everyone loves presents.
She's been in Jade's room before, but the dark colors always surprise her, scare her, and intrigues her even. She couldn't understand how a girl would want to sleep in a room painted with black walls, or portraits of butterflies that look conspicuously like little monsters in the dark. She doesn't understand, but the mystery is what makes Cat fond of her brooding friend.
"Well, uh, I gotta go," Andre speaks, running his fingers through his braids. "Gotta scrape the dead skin off my Grandma's feet." They all shiver at that.
"Yeah I should be getting to Rex," Robbie perches in, beginning to walk out with his friend.
She sees the look of displeasure on Jade's face. She was never fond of Rex and neither was Cat, quite frankly. He always said mean things to her.
The slight thud of the door closing snaps Cat's frizzy brain to Jade. This is it, this is the reason she spent nearly a month's allowance, to be here, alone, with her dearest friend. She's still excited for the cool presents she bought Jade, but the thick lump in her throat didn't disappear. She almost wishes that Andre is back, here to interpret the annoyed actress so Jade could understand that she's sorry, that she would never purposely humiliate her, that she wishes to rekindle their friendship, but deep down she knows this needs to be done on her own.
"I got you some things," Cat manages to say with a small smile, skipping over to the bed. Boxes, all in different sizes and colors, clutter the goth's large bed. She picks a purple one, a rectangular shape to fit the tall gift, and tries to hand it to Jade but the girl remains still, hands planted to her hips as if they depended on it.
"I don't want your gifts." For someone so expressionistic on the stage, grasping the audience with her every word, the taller girl's voice lacks any character. She's never heard of anything that empty before.
"Oh Jadey please-" She begins to beg, pushing her bottom lip out, blinking erratically but Jade wants nothing of it.
"My name is not Jadey, and I don't like your begging." She skims past Cat, pushing the loads of boxes aside to sit on her bed, back facing the ginger.
"But, but..." She expects this reaction for her, but that doesn't stop the pain, the tears, the knot in her throat as she holds back a sob.
"Look Cat why don't you go, alright? I don't want to talk to you."
Ouchie. She hates Jade like this, all quiet and still, furniture to her life. She wishes to hear her yell, that vibrant sound of vivacity, her sigh of displeasure, something to resemble the girl she cares about. But all she's blessed with is her back, an exposed plane of ivory in her black halter dress.
White teeth sink into her bottom lip while her heart gallops in her chest. She's terrified of her friend, but her fear sparks her curiosity, and her determination to help. "No."
Jade didn't hear that, she knows it because she could barely hear herself, but there is evidence of a voice and they both know it's her. It's just what Cat said is the question.
"What?" Jade stands from the bed, facing the ginger with a cool mask of mystery.
Being unknown of Jade's feelings usually meant danger or manipulation, but Cat steps on her apprehension with a deep breath. "I'm not going."
She doesn't yell like Cat thinks she would- so her prepared wince is for nothing- but the goth is surprised with her studded brow arching just slightly. "Excuse me?"
Be strong. Be strong. "I'm not leaving until you take my gift- t-this gift," she corrects, dropping the rectangular box to grab a smaller one of the same shape. "I promise you I'll go...if that's what you want—"
"Yeah that's what I want."
"So then just open it."
The goth gives her a thorough look, an expression of frustration with a splash of bewilderment. Cat never stands up for herself, like ever. She usually has Tori to ask her things that are hard to get, or Andre and Robbie. And Jade to beat up the bad guy who tried to steal her purse that time. This is the first of her life where she finally says no and stands her ground. It feels good, uplifting.
She snatches the black-wrapped box and tugs on the purple satin ribbon until it's a single line. Her brow- that's thinner and more transparent- quivers against her pale skin as she lifts the gift from the box, dangling titanium scissors by the thumb. The goth holds them by the blades, delicately like a wilted flower, and stares with a bewildering gaze. It's almost child-like, the way Cat looks at everything. Like it's something that brings warmth in her heart.
"Is this...are these... but it can't be true." Her blue eyes dance back and forth from Cat to the sterling silver, unable to tear away from her gift for too long, as if they would vanish if she does.
"Uh-huh," Cat giggles with a nod, relieved that Jade loves the present that nearly maxed out her credit card. As if she needs to explain that to her parents again. "These are the scissors they use in The Scissoring 2. They washed off all the fake blood, but there's a small carve of the creator's initials on the circle, handle thingy." Jade checks for verification and smiles when it's true. "I even tweeted the director and he says they're really real."
Jade looks up at Cat, thoroughly, and with time her smile falters until it returns to that traditional scowl. It's as if that euphoria washed from her when she looks at the ginger, remembering why they were separated in the first place, being reminded that Cat exists. It brings her to her own frown, eyeing the pale girl with confusion and pain, but Jade doesn't seem to care.
"I can't take these," she says softly, almost regretfully, as she extends her hands with the scissors enclosed in them.
"But Jade they're-"
"No, Cat. You just can't, you can't bribe me back into a friendship," she hisses out, forcibly shoving the scissors in Cat's hand.
"I wasn't bribing. "
"Yeah you were. Sweet, adorable Cat can't get what she wants so she buys it-"
"Nuh-uh," Cat whines, voice wavering. "I didn't do it to the first pair!" The words flow from her mouth like a jumbled tornado- fast and erratic without any binding. This is why she needs Andre; he always know how to say her thoughts.
"First pair? I've only gotten one as a gift for Christmas." Her frustration is lifted temporarily with confusion, until it shifts to shock and clarity. "You...you were my secret Santa?"
A small voice tells her to lie, that the gift would lose its significance, that revealing the truth would defeat the purpose of giving, but there's no point. With a sigh she makes a small nod, eyes on her friend's combat boots.
"I didn't know."
"You weren't suppose to," Cat replies, gazing at her through long lashes.
"Look Cat, this gift is great and all, but you told me you'd leave when I opened it."
Her words grasp on Cat's skin like a lighter grazing across it, scorching and blistering. She didn't expect Jade to remember that slight promise, especially after her extraordinary gift. Cat, the giggly and loving person she is, keeps her walls down for everyone, open for anyone to seize and control. By the time she wants to protect herself, the intruders are already inside, killing everything evident until there's nothing left. That's what Jade did; tear everything out from the root, making sure it's too damaged to grow.
"Why, Jade?" Cat couldn't help but ask, tears streaming her tanned cheeks. "Why don't you w-want to be my friend."
Jade overlooks the ginger's despair with a disgruntled sigh, a guilty one, and a roll of the eyes. "It doesn't matter-"
"It does to me!" Cat finds herself screaming over the tight knot in her throat.
"Well I don't really care."
"Yeah you do because you would be screaming at me, or being my friend, or making fun of me as usual!" The vehemence surprises Cat but she oddly does not regret it. She wants to be nice to everyone, give them everything they want, but sometimes she needs to put her own needs before others . "When you're quiet that means you're covering, and you're hurt. Tell me why you're hurt!"
Her mask is loosening. The tight, cool stone of indifference is fluttering with pain and annoyance.
Jade's beginning to lose it.
"Cat, I told you to get out." Her voice is shaking and her blue eyes are betraying her expression with its watery gaze.
She's almost there.
"Not until you tell me what's wrong—"
"I hate what you made me!"
For once it's not Cat who is confused by her response, frustrated by the lack of eloquence, or stuck with jumbled thoughts. It's odd to know that Jade's walls her down and there's nothing she could do to rebuild them. At least not now.
"I hate that you destroyed my eyebrows-"
"You chopped off all my hair, ya know," she tries desperately to have bass behind her voice, but she can't forget the apparent pain she caused her friend.
"Yeah and it's back, more chemically-coated than ever," she hisses, giving thick strands of crimson a harsh flick. "While you have everything you want, I am here like some alien, open for everyone I've ever hurt to insult me- including Beck, the one person who I thought could have my back. You don't know what that's like, and you will never feel that way because people look at you as wide-eye bambi, the victim of typical Jade's wrongdoings, or you're too damn stupid to figure out that someone hates you!"
She can't say that her little voice wants her to cower because that's an understatement. Her whole body screams to shrink, run and cry at Jade's icy words, but her feet remain planted on her floor, eyes aligned with cold blue. She's sacrificed so much to be before the goth today and it won't go in vain. Those cold words just show Jade's true emotions and as much as it hurts Cat, they intrigue her and make her see Jade in a new light. Makes her see a humanistic girl, rather than a cold, crime-fighting robot.
"Jadey—"
"I swear to God if you call me that one more time!" Somehow Cat figures Jade is yelling because she's showing she's human, her eyes glistening with unshed tears, begging to stream.
And the moment that tear drops, releasing from those brilliant eyes, is where Cat sees it, the pain, the frustration, the embarrassment of being this emotional. She starts to wipe away the offending tear drop, but thinks best of it when anger rekindles in the softness of her pain. Her small hand quickly returns to her side.
"I'm so sorry—"
"You know I really don't want to hear your sorry, or anyone else's sorry because it's all just air-headed, linguistic bull-shit!" Jade's yelling stems deeper than Cat's accidental snipping and it's so obvious even the ginger could tell almost immediately. Or maybe she could just read Jade better than others can. She's not sure.
"I'm not..." She closes her eyes to prevent the hurt from seeping into her brain "I'm not your father, Jade. I don't lie, it's really really hard to lie, and you're my friend and I wouldn't..." Her friend, for the second time tonight, doesn't slap her or yell at her, but it was still a low blow. Their rule, unspoken but somehow established, is to never speak of their parents. They never discuss Jade's father's neglect and his flagrant disregard of her existence, and they never speak of Cat's smothering mother and unstable brother. She hates to talk about it but she needs to prove to Jade that she's not like the others- the kids in their junior high school, her father, eventually Beck. Despite their clash in personality it's always been Cat and Jade. She needs to prove that hasn't changed.
With a reluctant sigh Cat grabs the crown of her hair, synthetic strands smooth against her palm, and pulls it back, revealing her small head. Cat learns from this experience that it isn't easy for her hair to grow back. Within a month her hair has grown in a buzz cut, tight brown curls, unruly to the length behind her ear. She looks ridiculous, her mother says to her, and she rather be dead than to look like a skinhead. It didn't hurt Cat, surprised her maybe, but her true pain stems from Jade's hatred for her. Jade hates her because she feels different, an outcast to society and even her friends. Well, she's going to show her that nothing's changed.
With the scissors still in her hand she brings them up to her left brow, caressing it with her free hand, and clips the thin hair there, making sure her snips are shallow so they barely touch her skin.
"Cat!" Jade asks pointedly, watching her with wide eyes and an opened mouth. "Cat what are you doin—what—stop!"
She ignores her and finishes the snips until they are nothing but thin strands of hair that seems to be impossible to eradicate without a wax. She goes on to do the other side, twitching at the falling hairs on the bridge of her nose before brushing them off. Those blue eyes still remain big on her forehead, flabbergasted at her bold move,
Cat makes a small smile, feeling triumphant as a giggle slips out. "I don't see the big deal, Jade. We are all people and people will always make fun of us. Rex always say mean things to me..." her chocolate brown eyes flutter, briefly, until they return on the still-shocked brunette. "But I don't pay any mind because I have you, and Tori, and everyone else. I didn't even think you would be...hurt. You're Jadey-" she winces when the goth throws her a glare but continues nevertheless, "- and you're my superhero and I miss you..."
Contemplation lies heavy on the pale girl's face, light brows hung low, narrowed bright eyes. She almost looks determined to remain angry, to kick Cat out of her house and her life, but her cold gaze slowly melts, brows softening, eyes loosening from that intensive gaze, and finally, finally, the edges of her mouth tug and her lips purse forward into a small smirk. "You look like a spokesperson for a St. Jude's ad."
"Which saint is that one?" she asks, genuinely confused, but she's glad Jade makes that traditional sigh of playful exasperation, pinching the bridge of her nose, shaking her head. It seems like Cat said something dumb, again, but she doesn't mind; things are slowly piecing back together.
"Nothing, Cat,"she continues to shake her head, a smile still against her lips. "So..." her eyes focus more on the clutter that's on her bed. "Whatcha get me?"
"Oh my god, you're going to love them!" Cat squeals, barely able to keep her feet on the floor as she skips to the bed. "Hmm open this one," She drops her wig and the scissors to pick up the square-shaped present, just to drop it and pick up the longest one. "No this one." Seeing that this gift isn't much of a eye-opener but a 'gee thanks' kind of thing, she drops that one as well. "Maybe this one?"
"How about I pick the first gift because if you change your mind one more time, I'll rip off what's left of your eyebrows." That ice is back but somehow Cat can differentiate her veracity of wanting to hurt someone's feelings from her odd taste of humor, though the tone is nearly identical. Maybe it's that smirk on her face that looks coy rather than intimidating.
Jade lifts and unwraps the long. rectangular box and a grin forms to her lips, a quizzical one, as she holds the present by its long stem, careful that it doesn't crumble.
"I remember you said one time that you wanted to know if black roses existed, and it turns out they don't. People just put a special dye in the water. I kept the dye in too long for the other flowers...so they kinda broke." she pouts, thinking of the memory. "But this one lived, and I thought 'hey this one is really, really strong'." An involuntary giggle strokes the air, but her eyes return calmly, happily, on the goth's. "Like you, Jade... you're the strongest girl I know."
A rosy hue hits pale cheeks and Jade tries to hide it, failing, because Cat is already smiling, dimples cutting her tanned skin as she gazes up at the taller girl. "This is...wow, this is...I gotta admit this is cute and it doesn't gross me out...much."
"You have more," Cat giggles, handing her a bigger box while taking the rose, placing it on Jade's desk beside her bed.
The soft, tearing sound of wrapping paper only rasps the quiet room. This time those expressive eyes widen in the most playful manner that Cat's ever seen. She looks like a child on Christmas day, excited to play with her new doll her mommy gave her. Well Jade will be no different except it's a...different kind of doll.
"You got the voodoo doll that psycho bitch Ponnie gave Tori?" she gushes some more, stroking the brown synthetic strands with a pale finger.
"Tori didn't like it much...but I figured you'd want it. And don't worry she doesn't know a thing. Kay now open the next one!" Cat's glad that Jade seems to be really enjoying her new dolly, though it's kind of weird, but she has one more left.
With reluctance Jade places her doll at the center of her bed, softly, like it's worth something and that makes Cat's heart flutter. The goth opens the last wrapped box and her brows knit over her eyes, and it's what Cat's expecting. It looks stupid from a shallow, one-sided, point of view. "It's like a textbook of empty pages. Ya know, for you to write your plays and poetry in." Jade then makes a relaxed smile, opening the book, turning the crisp pages, one after the other, as if she's reading a humorous script. "When you were drawing before I noticed you were at the end of the book and I know they don't sell blank books like this anywhere so...surprise!" She stretches her arms out, animating her words with a cheeky smile.
If one of her talents is annoying people until they tolerate her, the other is making people smile, feel warmth inside them with the gestures she does. Yes, those are nice but something about making Jade smile, the ice-queen, to smooth out the wrinkles of her sustainable frustration, gives Cat a special warmth in her body. Her blue eyes dance along the blank sheets with clarity, as if she knows what's going to be printed there. Cat silently hopes Jade allows her to see the words that'll grace the ivory pages, though it's unlikely. That didn't matter to Cat;she's just glad they are friends again.
"Cat...I really don't know what to say."
Jade's lack of eloquence, borderline shyness fascinates and amuses Cat. But she keeps it hidden in a grin that bursts out a giggle when time lapses. No longer holding back her bubble of joy she leaps into a tight hug, like she usually does with the taller girl, and laughs when she hears that familiar growl of displeasure, a sound she hasn't heard in a month. She keeps her expression of euphoria when she moves from the hug, smiling up at the goth, her hero, her friend, a rekindled comrade.
Jade knows this as well, her scowl not as tight, not as forced, and it grows into a gentle grin. She knows that their friendship is this odd, unexplained, yet genuine bond that neither of them wants to break. They both know no matter how bad, how mean her jokes are, that she could call Cat's phone or drive to her house and she'll be there with open arms, an airless laugh, and a mouth full of candy.
There's no definite name or reason how their opposing personalities mesh more than clash, but it is definitely true, and definitely theirs.
And something as stupid and frivolous as hair surely won't break that.
My little one-shot of friendship. Got my feet wet. I would love for you to tell me what you think in a review. That'll make me smile and improve :)