Here's to Old Friends...
(Set around 6 years after Spencer's dalliance with Lila Archer)
"Spencer, is that you?"
Reid turned to see an attractive blonde smiling at him. "Lila, hello!"
"Hello yourself. What has it been, 6 years? You look amazing."
Lila Archer leaned in for a hug which took Reid by surprise. They hugged warmly and he said "It has been quite a while; you look wonderful. I like the short hair."
Lila pulled a face, "Really, I'm still getting used to it. You know, when you're a mum, long hair just isn't practical."
"A mum, I didn't know... how would I? Congratulations."
"Yeah, thanks. I have a daughter, she's almost 3. So, you're the last person I expected to see here... although..."
"We did originally meet in an art gallery." Spence finished her thought for her.
"Exactly. Who are you with? What was his name... your colleague, Jason?"
"Oh, no. Jason left the BAU years ago. He writes occasionally but we haven't stayed in touch for the most part... It's a long story. What about you, is your husband here with you?"
"Spencer, I said I had a child, I didn't say I was married."
"Oh, I'm sorry... I just assumed, sorry."
She laughed "It's okay, it's sweet that you think that... it's totally you."
He wasn't sure if that was a compliment; he let it pass.
"So, I tried to follow your career, but I haven't seen much of you since way back when."
"My 'career' is no longer. After all that business... I just decided I wasn't cut out for that world. I went back to school actually and I got a degree. I'm a pre-school educator now."
"That's wonderful, really great. Do you enjoy it?"
"I love it; the kids are awesome and I get to goof around with them. Reyne, my daughter, attends the pre-school so I know where she is every minute of the day and I get to be involved in her upbringing. I love spending quality time with her, she's my world."
"Is her dad in the picture? That's a beautiful name by the way."
Lila smiled "I love it too, it suits her. I spelled i E; I got it from an Australian singer/songwriter; I love his music and I loved the name. Um, her dad is not in the picture to answer your question. "
Spence felt the mood shift a little, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to pry."
"No, it's totally fine... I just don't much like thinking about it... Hey, do you want to get a drink or something? Are you done here?"
He lied, he'd only been at the gallery for 15 minutes before running in to Lila. "Sure, that would be nice."
So they left and went to a bar down the block. They both ordered red wine and took a small booth at the back of the bar. It was only 8.00 and still fairly quiet.
Lila held up her glass, "Here's to running into old friends."
Were they old friends? He touched his glass to hers and they both took nervous gulps.
She remarked "You're not entirely comfortable with this, are you?"
"I wouldn't say that; I am happy to see you. I did try to phone you a few times you know."
Lila seemed surprised, "Oh... I didn't get any messages, I'm sorry."
Spence smiled "I tried... as in I picked up the phone a few times... I didn't actually dial your number though."
She smiled shyly "Oh, I see. So, why didn't you?"
"One of those things I guess... It wasn't a very pleasant time in your life; I suppose I didn't want to remind you of it."
She nodded, "I understand. I would have liked to talk to you though... So tell me Dr Reid, what has been happening in your life these past years?"
Spence shifted in his seat, not really knowing what to say or indeed where to begin. "Well, my job takes up most of my time, keeps me busy... we work long hours."
"No one special in your life?"
"Um, no... That's never really happened for me."
Lila touched his hand lightly and said "It will... you're a great guy Spencer. When the time is right, you'll meet someone and it will be special."
"You know that, because...?"
"Because I know you're one of the good guys. You're genuine, caring and honest... not to mention extremely handsome... and I know you're a great kisser!"
Spence couldn't help but laugh, "There is that I suppose."
"Hey, that kiss in the pool meant a lot to me... I've never forgotten it."
"Glad to hear it... I've not forgotten either."
She smiled but didn't say anything. After an awkward moment he asked "Can I get you another drink? Do you need to be somewhere?"
"Nope, my mum has Reyne tonight; it's their special nanny time. I would love another glass of red."
While Spence was at the bar Lila couldn't help but check him out. She had forgotten how tall he was but she hadn't forgotten that face, those eyes. What she like most about Spencer Reid was that as incredibly handsome as he was, he didn't realise it. Now, 6 years later, he was even more handsome than she recalled. He still had that killer smile and he was still gorgeously awkward and shy. She watched as he walked back to their booth.
When he sat down he said "What is that look about?"
She had been caught checking him out. "Nothing... I was just thinking... If I hadn't promised myself something when Reyne was born... Well let's just say I was having flash-backs."
He was intrigued. "What did you promise yourself?"
She sighed, "I promised myself I wouldn't sleep with guys unless I was in a committed relationship with them."
Spencer just looked at her in shock. She laughed "I know, that's out there! I apologise for being so forward."
"It's okay I guess... but it was a little out of left field."
"Mm. I was just thinking how gorgeous you are and thoughts about our pool rendezvous came flooding back... I've embarrassed you."
"A little, yeah. For a long time I wondered what might have been, if we had lived in the same world... or at least the same zip code... but we didn't so I let the thoughts go."
"So you thought about it too? I'm happy to hear that. I was young and wild when we met and I was attracted to you and given the circumstances I found myself in I thought why the hell not... but I did wonder as well, what if..."
"It was a long time ago. I was young and naive myself back then and because of the circumstances, I couldn't afford to let it go any further but of course I thought about the what ifs."
She smiled warmly "I remember it was hard enough just getting you to kiss me... I knew then that you were a nice guy and I knew you wouldn't start up anything that couldn't possibly lead anywhere. I think that was part of the attraction."
"May I ask you something? [She nodded] Were you in a committed relationship with Reyne's father or is that why you made that promise to yourself, not to make that mistake again?"
She paused for a moment; "We were together for almost a year when I fell pregnant but it wasn't an ideal relationship. He was using and for a long time I let it ride; I guess I hoped he would change but he was who he was and I knew that going in. When I got pregnant with Reyne I hoped he would settle down and man up but he didn't. I made the break when I was 6 months along and I knew I had to walk away for the sake of my child. He died of an overdose when she was barely 4 months old..."
"Oh, I am so sorry. That must have been very difficult for you."
"It was... but in retrospect, I was glad that I had walked away when I did. She will never have her father in her life but she also will never be a part of that scene and for that I'm grateful."
"Sometimes it's the hardest thing to do, to walk away I mean, but it sounds like you did it for all the right reasons and you have your daughter and she is a part of you and she makes you who you are."
Lila brushed away a stray tear and said "That's why I don't like talking about him. I did love him, and he will always be the father of my child but I couldn't go on living like that... it still makes me sad to think that he died the way he did and that he never got to know his child but all things happen for a reason, right?"
"That's what they say. I'm sorry I brought all of this up."
"It's fine; like you said, it made me who I am... I like the person I am today. I'm a terrific mother and she is the pot of gold at the end of my rainbow and I will spend her whole life making sure that she knows who her dad was... well, the good stuff anyway... Maybe someday I will meet a guy who can be a father figure in her life, someone I can trust to fill that void but for now, it's just her and me and we have a great life together."
Spencer smiled "I'm so glad to hear that; I'm really happy for you Lila."
"Thanks sweetie. I just want her to have a decent, normal life you know. I don't want her surrounded by drugs and turmoil... I want to give her a stable upbringing."
"Well lucky you didn't settle on me then! Boom-Tish!" Spencer delivered the line in a theatrical manner with a gestured drum-roll at the end.
Lila didn't get the joke; she looked concerned rather than amused. "I don't get it."
"Sorry, I don't know where that came from. Let's just say I haven't exactly lived up to your idealisation of good father material either."
Lila thought back on what she had said and then offered nervously "Drugs?"
Spencer looked everywhere but at Lila. "Spencer?"
His eyes settled back on his wine glass and he nodded slowly, "Ahuh. It was a long time ago and it wasn't my choice..."
"There is always a choice Spencer."
Reid became defensive and a little angry, "Not when you're taken hostage by a deluded psychopath who chooses to shoot you full of an addictive drug!"
Lila processed what he was saying. "I'm sorry that that happened to you. Are you okay?"
"If you mean am I still using, no, the answer is no."
"I meant are you okay physically, emotionally, spiritually... that must have been horrible for you to go through."
He softened his tone, "I'm fine. It was something I went through but I got help and I moved on. It was a chapter in my life I wasn't proud of but it's over."
"I'm glad, for your sake. This job of yours is a daily battle I'm sure; the things you see, the people you deal with... for someone like you it must take its toll, devastating at times I imagine. "
"Someone like me?"
Her eyes softened, "Your intelligence, your softness, your ability to care and feel - it can't be easy."
"No it isn't... but for the most part I am working with a team of people whose job it is to get the bad guys and help the victims - that's what keeps me going."
She smiled "Well I don't envy you, not one little bit. Spencer, I believe what I said earlier, you're one of the good guys - probably one of the best I've ever met and I want only good things for you in life."
"Thanks Lila, I appreciate that."
She tried to shift the focus of their conversation. "So, what drew you to the gallery tonight?"
Spence smiled, glad that the talk was taking another direction. "I'm on leave for a couple of weeks; I just enjoy seeing the expression of people's artistic traits. What about you?"
"An old friend was showing her photographs; the exhibit from Africa."
"Oh I saw that; she has an amazing eye for detail, they were quite impressive."
"Mm, I thought so too. I love the solitude of being in a gallery. It's like there are lots of people around but you feel alone somehow... You can lose yourself in the work and think and feel whatever you like without outside influences or pressures."
Spencer smiled, "I couldn't have put it better myself. Do the kids you work with express their creativity?"
"Oh you better believe it. There is this one little boy, James, who will only ever colour with a black pencil or crayon and I was getting worried about him. I sat him down a couple of weeks ago and asked him why he always chose the black one. He told me it was his favourite, and when I asked him why it was his favourite he looked up at me, these huge brown eyes... and he said because his puppy is black and he loves his puppy!"
Spencer chuckled "That's the best answer ever! How wonderful to think like a small child, so simplistic."
"I know right. There is another little girl who will only paint with her fingers; she says that she likes the feel of the paint on her hands."
"Oh, she's a true artist. Keep an eye out for her, she will have her work hanging some day."
Lila nodded in agreement; "It's wonderful to watch them develop and learn."
"Well you play a big part in that. You can hone in on their talents and direct them where appropriate. Every kid has ability with something; kids are not born uneducated... they just need guidance to follow their abilities, to learn with what makes them comfortable, whatever that may be."
"I believe that too. Tell me, do you believe kids are born evil or bad?"
"Oh there are arguments for both sides of that coin. I tend to flip-flop on that one. I've seen people who do the most dreadful things and then find out later that they've had the most horrendous starts in life and you wonder if they ever had a chance at a normal life... but similarly, I've seen people who had everything handed to them, never wanted for anything, had the best of everything and still they turn to crime and anti-social behaviour in the extreme. I've seen young kids do some horrible things and not have an ounce of remorse and you have to wonder how they got to be that way; I've seen it with good families and bad - there is no rhyme or reason to it, it just is."
"It's interesting isn't it?"
"You can read a hundred different stories about one subject and still come out the other side not knowing the real answer. Sometimes there just aren't any answers. It's like the occupations that people choose; you wonder how they came to be. You might see a guy who has become a cop because a cop helped his family when he was at an impressionable age; or it might be because his dad was a cop or because he has an authority issue and thinks being a cop will take care of that need - but hopefully the bad side of that coin gets weeded out in the early stages of a career hunt for those who only want to use their influence to dominate over those lesser than them. There are just so many variables when it comes to human behaviour and I think you could drive yourself nuts trying to pigeon hole any one group into a single category."
"What about you Spencer, why do you think you ended up where you are, doing what you're doing?"
Spence drank the last of his wine and searched silently for an answer. He said "All I know is that growing up I was always told I could be whatever I wanted, that I was smart enough to do anything, be anything... When I got to high school the pressure started to build and it was like I had to choose a career path. Sometimes I resented that I had to be mature enough to make those decisions so early on; there were older kids who didn't have such pressures so why did I... Then when I got to college and I started to develop interests in certain areas I felt that my true calling would find me, rather than me choosing it. I took on degrees and diplomas in fields that interested me the most and I worked at honing those abilities. I chose the path that I'm on because I truly wanted to use my intelligence and knowhow for something worthwhile instead of just earning shitloads of money! That isn't who I am... I think I chose wisely and as I said earlier, for the most part this job is great and I feel honoured to do the work I do... So, what about you? You were an actress and now you find yourself working with young children and help shaping them as they get older. You didn't have Reyne before you decided to go into that field, so why do you think you went down that path?"
Lila thought before answering. "For the most part, I think it has something to do with the way I was raised. Don't get me wrong, I had great parents and I had a good childhood but I think they were gypsies at heart. We travelled a lot and they loved the hippie lifestyle. Dad worked at whatever he could find in whatever town we ended up in but he didn't have a clue about settling down and growing roots. Mum was the caretaker of the family but she encouraged us to have a free spirit and roam. It was nothing for us to be out of the house from 7.00am til after dark. I think that's really how I began my acting career; my friends and I would put on little shows and make costumes and rehearse and then we'd present the finished product to the neighbourhood kids and try and make a buck. [Spencer smiled] I enjoyed taking on other personas and pretend to be something I wasn't. I loved the arts school that I attended for the same reason and I was one of the lucky ones; I feel in to work quite quickly and it all began... but as you know, that didn't last. My spirit was broken with all that business and I began to re-evaluate. I wanted to work with kids and I knew if I was serious I would have to go back to school and get a diploma, which I did, and now I'm the happiest I have ever been."
"And it shows; you light up like a Christmas tree at the mention of your work... you're very lucky to have that passion Lila. People can go their whole lives without finding what they really want or aspire to."
"Well I feel lucky Spencer... Hey, it's getting late. I can't drink anymore because I'm driving; what about you?"
"No, that's it for me. If I have any more red wine I'll be awake all night. Like you said, it's getting late. Can I walk you to your car?"
"That would be lovely, thanks."
So they strolled the 4 blocks to Lila's car, chatting along the way. She pointed to the red sedan parked, "That's me."
She leaned against her driver's side door and said "This was really nice Spencer; I'm so glad I ran in to you."
"It was nice... I enjoyed our talk."
She nodded. "Is there any point in my giving you my number or you giving me a card?"
Spencer stuffed his hands into the pockets of his trousers and let the breeze take his hair from his face and smiled "I guess not... This was lovely but I think we both know it won't go anywhere."
Lila nodded and smiled "Maybe someday we'll bump into one another again... perhaps at another gallery."
"You just never know. Good luck Lila, with everything... I hope you find that special guy to watch out for you and Reyne... but you don't need that; you're doing an amazing job on your own and Reyne is lucky to have you. Keep your passion alive and keep doing what you enjoy."
"I will... And you, you get yourself out there Dr Reid... There is an amazing lady out there just waiting for you to find her and when you do, she's going to be one of the luckiest ladies on this planet - I know that for a fact."
Spencer smiled shyly and was then caught by surprise when Lila's mouth took his. He accepted her warm and gentle kiss and felt his knees weaken. She took his hands from his pockets and leaned back against her car, taking his body with hers. He lowered his mouth to hers and he delivered a passionate, deep kiss which she accepted eagerly. When she drew him back in for another, he took a step back and said clumsily "I better go... It was lovely to see you Lila. Take care."
Her eyes misted over as she realised it wasn't going to happen for them... her loss. "Take care Spencer."
He walked out of sight on the dark street and out of her life. She smiled to herself as she thought about how much his kissing had improved over the years... Here's to running in to old friends she mused.
When Spencer reached his place, the first thing he did was download some James Reyne tunes; something more to remember Lila by... apart from the memory-laden kiss they had shared that evening.