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Shit Happens

Carlisle was walking towards the kitchen, empty glass in hand. He looked out the open window that showed the porch and a humming bird eating from the feeder Esme hung up years ago. Carlisle didn't see hummingbirds often, so this was a beautiful sight.

"Shit," distracted, Carlisle walked half his body into the wall by the kitchen, tripping in the process. He caught himself, but dropped his glass, and the sound rung throughout the room. Frightened, perhaps, the hummingbird flew away in the direction of the setting sun.

Emmett, alerted by the sound of the glass and his father's curse, left the living room and went to go help his dad clean up.

"Need help?"

"Shit!" Carlisle was on his knees, cleaning the glass with a rag and his hand. Not paying attention to the sounds of Emmett walking towards him, he was startled by the sudden appearance of his son, and accidentally cut himself with one of the pieces of glass.

Sheepish, Emmett mumbled an apology and went to go find the dust pan and broom.

Carlisle was already walking to the sink when Emmett came back. He started to clean the floor, looking for any shards and pieces of glass he might have missed.

Once again, Emmett heard his dad shout, "SHIT!"

Carlisle brought his hand to himself after the water nearly boiled it. He needed to get that faucet fixed. He turned the water to a colder setting and waited for it to cool down.

The footsteps the men heard coming down the stairs told them Esme heard the yelling.

Esme rushed into the kitchen, looking for any injuries. What she found was a cleaning Emmett and a slightly bleeding Carlisle who was smiling apologetically to her. She shook her head and softly snorted.

Emmett saw his mom cross her arms and lean on the wall, shaking her head at his dad. He smirked and dumped the glass in the trash can. On his way to the laundry room, he stubbed his toe on a leg of the kitchen table, crying out in the process, "Shit!"

"Emmett!" Esme admonished.

"Sorry, Mom," Emmett said, "but I'm sure it'll happen again."

Esme, arms still crossed, raised her eyebrow, "Why?" It sounded like a warning and a question fused together.

Emmett shrugged, "Because shit happens."

Please review if you liked it, hated it, or want another funny one-shot. Thanks for reading. ~ MizzSarcasm