The sun was sinking in the window behind Oliver's head. We were sitting on his bed, just the two of us, staring at each other. Miley was at a Hannah-thing, and had finally let me have him to myself for a night. His eyes, red and puffy, held my gaze. Even with all the sorrow that filled them, they were so beautiful.
"Lilly, do you think anyone will ever love me?" He asked. I winced at the question. It caught me off guard.
I whispered, "I love you, Oliver, more then you will ever know."
"Of course you do, you're my best friend. But why doesn't she?" Once again, tears pooled in his eyes, and flowed down his perfect cheeks. My fingers ached to wipe them away, to rid him of the pain he was feeling. Instead, he pulled his shirt up over his face, wiping it clean, then pulled it off and reached for a football beside his bed.
There was nothing else I could do besides try to talk him out of his misery. "I really have no idea. You're everything any girl could ever dream of. Forget her." Forget her, my heart tried to yell. Can't you see that I love you? I knew I could never speak those words. We had made a best friend pact in kindergarten to never fall in love. He couldn't know that I'd broken it.
"Lil," He started. "I can't ever seem to find a girl who loves me." He threw the ball hard against his door, pushing it shut.
I love you! I would never leave you! Give me a chance! I wanted to scream and cry. I wanted to do anything to get his attention; to make him realize that I loved him. I had known for years that if I only got the chance to be Oliver Oken's girlfriend, I'd never again make selfish wishes on my shooting stars.
As if it were it were a memory, I saw a perfect picture of the two of us behind my closed eyelids. He held my hand, hesitantly it seemed, and we stared across a beach. The stars were out and it was beautiful. I just knew a kiss would come next. I waited and waited, but it never happened.
"What are you thinking about?" He finally asked, reminding me that I was sitting on a messed up bed with mismatched sheets, not on a tropical island expecting a perfect kiss that would never happen.
I smiled at the thought of what his lips would feel like against mine. "Nothing, really. I just want to know what I can do to make you feel better..." I trailed off, wondering if that was a good enough lie to fool him. It was.
"You could get her to love me." More tears stained his beautiful face.
"Ollie, this isn't gonna get you anywhere. Just move on. She's not worth your tears."
"No? Then why am I crying?"
"Oliver, if this is how you're gonna look at it, I'm outta here." As hard as it was, I left his room without looking back.
I was going crazy knowing that Oliver would rather let me, his best friend, leave than just get a better attitude. It confirmed what I thought before. I'd never be the girl who first entered his thoughts in the morning. His lips wouldn't yearn for mine and his body wouldn't crave my touch. I could never be the girl he wanted.
If you could see that I'm the one who understands you, been here all along, so why can't you see, you belong with me
Oliver's ring-tone rang through my silent bedroom. As much as I wanted to ignore the call and prove that I could be okay without him, too, my aching heart wouldn't allow it. I needed to hear his voice. I needed to know that he was okay.
"Yeah Ollie?"
"Can you come over? I gotta talk to you."
I sighed. It crossed my mind to say no, but again, I knew it would feel wrong. "Yeah, of course, I'll be right over."
His house had been built right behind mine a few years back. His parents said they liked the neighborhood better than their old one, but Oliver and I both knew they wanted us to be close. They saw how special our friendship was. It was that that encouraged them to give me an extra house key to use whenever I needed something. I used it then, and slipped up the stairs trying not to wake them.
"What is it, Oliver?" I didn't dare hope that he might have realized his feelings for me because it was probably just that the ex-girlfriend had come to her senses and wanted him back. They all loved him. Eventually, the relationship would end because of a lack of physicality, but until then, he was irresistible. He was saving himself for marriage and girls didn't understand that. They'd put up with it for awhile, and that was probably what the current girl had told him. That was probably why he sounded... happy.
"Well, Lilly, I've realized something." For a moment, he look embarrassed.
"C'mon, spit it out!" I joked, but was serious, and he could tell.
"OK, this isn't gonna be easy..." He looked around, thinking of a way to start. My heart started to race as I tried to imagine what he could be trying to tell me. That wasn't how the "she wants me back" speeches ever started. Finally, he started to talk again, "Lilly, when you left my room, I realized that I did need to get over myself. I don't think I ever really loved Jamie. There's another girl in my life that's had a special place way longer than she has. This girl has been there for me whenever I needed. Every time I needed to talk, she was there. I realized I've been trying to cover something up. I almost forgot about it myself. But it was always there. Lilly, every time I was with Jamie, I felt the guilt eating at me. I could never really commit myself to her, because the truth is-"
I couldn't believe it. Oliver was about to tell me that he loved me. My brain was melting, and all logical responses were running wild from the path to my mouth. I had no idea what to say.
"Lilly, the truth is, I'm in love Miley."
"What?" I felt like death was plunging a knife of betrayal and hurt deep into my soul. My whole being was shattered. I could feel myself breaking more and more with every step backwards. "Mi-Miley?"
"Yeah, ever since she first moved to Malibu, I realized that there was something about her."
I turned around, clutching my shirt where my heart was. I only looked back to say "I'm sorry, Oliver, but I have to go." I ran down the stairs noisily and gracelessly. I couldn't have cared less if his parents woke up. I needed to get out of the. Escape was the only thing besides hurt on my mind.
That night, I cried more then I ever had my entire life. The hot, salty tears kept falling down my face. Never once did my supply seem to dwindle. Several times, my mother came into my room. At first, she gave me tissues and asked what was wrong. As the night wore on, she just told me to be quiet.
But it didn't matter. Nothing mattered except that he didn't love me.
Disclaimer: This story is in no way affiliated with Disney Channel. Thanks, kbye3
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