Okay, so I wrote this story many a year ago based off some silly notes passed between myself and my good friend Reciprocal. Now, in honor of her birthday, I have decided to publish this story as a reminder of the amazing years of our love/hate friendship we have endured for the sake of good literature. She is the Guildenstern to my Rosencrantz, and I want to wish her a great birthday.
On a more serious note, this story is just for fun, and because I wrote it many years ago, very bad. It is just for sentimental value that I post it now. Please do not judge my writing skill off of this one story. Howver, if you derive joy from this awesome concept, feel free to share in our mirth over picturing Emmett in this situation. Enjoy!-KMC
Bella knocked on the door hesitantly. The cryptic phone call from Alice didn't leave her feeling very secure. The door was opened by a very annoyed Esme. "Boys, I don't know how I've survived your antics all these years… Oh! Hello Bella," she said looking as flustered as a vampire could. "Is this a bad time, I mean Alice called, but I could come back later," Bella stuttered, frightened of what might be going on behind that door. The Cullen boys had taken to playing extreme games of truth or dare, mostly ending with Emmett naked, Edward angry, and Jasper chuckling evilly in the corner. "No dear, it's all right, it's just that I think they pushed Emmett to his limit this time," she sighed.
Bella hesitantly crossed the door step, looking each way as though she was expecting something strange, like Jasper running full speed away from Emmett and Edward wearing a tutu and fairy wings (it had happened once and she did not need to be emotionally scarred again). She headed toward the laughing coming from the living room.
As she peered around the corner she saw the most unusual thing. Carlisle, usually the most calm and composed of all the Cullen's, was rolling on the floor, snorting with laughter. Snorting! Alice and Rosalie were more composed and comfortably sitting on the large leather sofa. Alice, who had probably already seen what was going to happen, was bouncing on the couch excitedly. She spotted Bella and squealed, "Hurry, Bella, before you miss this. Jasper and Edward dared Emmett to take a belly dancing class and today was his last one. They are trying to convince him that showing us what he learned was also part of the dare." At that, Bella heard Emmett's bear voice coming from the direction of the kitchen. "No! Edward that was NOT part of the dare! Jasper, stop trying to make me feel like dancing! Oh really, I'd like to see you shake it like a salt shaker!"
Bella went and sat down next to Rosalie, who was obviously trying not to laugh at her husband's embarrassment. They heard more shouts from the kitchen. "Maybe. But I'm not wearing that! No! Come on! But-," Those in the living room heard a loud crash and plates breaking and finally Emmett's voice saying, "Fine! But are the bells necessary?" More crashed and then, "Fine! Fine! I'll be out in a second!"
With that Jasper came out into the living room, smiling evilly, like he had just put a thumbtack under a teachers chair without getting caught. He sat down next to Alice and announced, "The show's about to start. They're just finishing up the last minute…preparations." Then Edward exited the kitchen smiling angelically, looking as though he hadn't just bullied Emmett into humiliating himself in front of his whole family. He sat down next to Bella and kissed her on her forehead. "I hope you weren't too hard on him," Bella whispered softly to him. He leaned over, still smiling and whispered back, "This is payback for when he made me take a strip tease exercise class and secretly filmed it." Bella whispered suggestively, "I'd like to see that video." Edward frowned. "Sorry, but after he showed it to everyone, I had Jasper hold him down while I burned it to his skin." Bella shrieked, "Edward!" Edward shushed her and whispered, "It was fine, he was able to chip the burnt plastic pieces off after a month, so no harm."
The angelic smile returned to his face and he whispered again "He's almost ready." Bella rolled her eyes as everyone settled down and waited for Emmett. Even Esme sat quietly in anticipation. Then, an explosion of laughter erupted from everyone's mouth as Emmett stepped into the room. Swathed from head to foot in sheer crimson fabric and covered in sequins, Emmett looked like an Indian sex slave.
The red linen was wrapped many times around his waist, giving the appearance of a skirt, and then draped loosely across one shoulder. The fabric was adorned in silver and gold sequins, enough to rival the Cullen's skin while out in the sun. Around his ankles and wrists were bells like cat collars. His skin had been doused in oil and his locks resembled a jerry curl. The worst was his face. With heavily lined eyes and many sparkles, he looked like Tim Curry from Rocky Horror Picture Show.
Carlisle was rolling on the floor again, Alice and Rosalie were laughing so hard they would have been close to tears (if they could cry), Edward and Jasper appeared as if they had just won the lottery, and Esme looked like she was going to be sick. As for Bella, she just sat there starring, mouth agape, unable to believe her eyes. Emmett sighed, "Are you ready?" Jasper replied, "Whenever you are my brother."
With that he hit a button on the stereo perched on the coffee table. Emmett stared to sway his hips seductively to the music. Bella felt a bit queasy watching her almost big brother dancing suggestively while smiling suspiciously at Edward and Jasper, who were guffawing like baboons. He began to gyrate closer and closer, the bells on his wrists and ankles shaking madly. He got right into Edward and Jaspers faces, smiling coyly and batting his eyelashes like a flirty girl.
Edward and jasper were laughing so hard they didn't see the evil glint in Emmett's eyes.
Suddenly, he grabbed his two brothers by the hair and threw them over his shoulder, slamming them onto the coffee table with a huge crash. The music abruptly stopped as everyone sat there in silence starring in shock. Emmett walked over the two groaning men and headed towards the stairs. He turned around sassily said, "Now you know girlfriends, you don't ever mess with this sister." He flicked his hair and stormed up the stairs. The whole living room sat in silence until Alice said in disbelief, "I didn't see that one coming."