After 9 months of anticipation, Jesus and Shrek were in the hospital waiting for their first child to leave the body of Christ and grace the world with its presence.
"Push, Jesus, push!" Shrek encouraged the saviour as he screamed loudly
The son of man had been in labour for 8 hours now yet the baby refused to leave the holy womb. Not even a signed copy of a Beyonce's latest album tempted the idiotic baby from the chamber inside Jesus' body.
"Offer it something better!" Jesus squealed
"I can give you Justin Bieber tickets with backstage passes."
"I think it just went further in!" He screeched
The ogre felt around in his pockets before pulling out a single onion, which he had been saving for later. At that moment Jesus screamed loudly and a hideous creature emerged from him, grabbed the onion and before it could go back inside the doctor grabbed it.
Shrek shed a tear.
"It's all ogre now." He whispered to Jesus
The nurse passed the thing to Jesus and he let it drink his milk.
"I want the green one's milk." The child claimed after drinking for a minute
Before long the ogre's breast was out and child sucked dat titty.
"Tastes like onions." It whispered