pWalking Ghost/p
pAuthor's note: This story takes place after the series ends,
it says how long in the story. There are no pairings. There are
no original characters who are named. (So far) There is no need
for any definitions of Japanese words, because Faye doesn't speak
Japanese. Yeah, just Faye. She's really the only character in
this fic, and if I do a whole story, she's gonna be the main
character. I suppose I identify with her a bit, she's in love
with a guy who doesn't really feel the same way. There's other
reasons too, I suppose, but I don't want to ramble too long. It
will suffice to say I have a lot more sympathy for Faye in the
second half of the sereis. If I get enough reviews, I might
continue, but I'm gonna say right now that Spike is NOT going to
ever appear in this. It's hardly that I don't like him, quite the
opposite. So lets let the poor guy rest in peace, huh? But I
digress. Insert the usual Don't own the characters or
setting, never will thing here. /p
pPrologue: Glass Hopes/p
p/p
pI close my eyes and I keep seein' things./p
pRainbow waterfalls, sunny liquid dreams./p
pConfusion creeps inside me rainin' down. /p
pGotta get to you, but I don't know how./p
p/p
pI had your number quite some time ago/p
pback when we were young, but I had to go/p
p10000 years I've searched it seems and now, /p
pgotta get to you, won't ya tell me how?/p
p/p
pWhat can I do? To get me to you?/p
piSelected Lyrics from Call me, Call me, from
the soundtrack CD Cowboy Bebop: Blue/i/p
pSunset on Mars isn't the same as sunset on Earth, or Ganymede,
or any other planet with a natural atmosphere. On Mars, where
only portions of the planet's surface are terraformed, it creeps
up on you. One minute, it's perfectly light. Then next thing you
know, it's suddenly deep twilight, and before you know it, it's
pitch black. The atmosphere's too thin to hold the light and
reflect it around for very long. /p
pAs Faye Valentine walked quickly along a darkening city
sidewalk, the scientific details of the rapidly approaching
darkness were just about the furthest thing from her mind. She
was a lot more concerned about the trouble it could cause her. At
night, a woman dressed the way she was walking alone down the
street looked like easy prey for the reptiles that stalked the
neither regions of this place. Not that Faye was afraid of
getting mugged, it was just that she was in a hurry and didn't
really feel like being bothered./p
piAnyone stupid enough to stop me tonight won't be around to
bother any other women, at least,/i Faye thought to herself
smiling slightly and letting her fingers brush across the grip of
her gun. /p
pBehind her, she heard the faint sound of a footstep. Not
turning around, she kept walking, idly hoping the person was just
some drunk. /p
pWell, what have we here? Lookin' for some company,
sweetheart? an deep, lyrical voice purred from the shadows
behind her. Faye squared her shoulders and kept walking. /p
pOh, so cold.... the voice was coming from right
behind her now, and Faye decided that it's owner wasn't planning
on leaving her alone. She stopped and let her hand drape loosely
across her holster before looking back at the deep voice's owner./p
pI don't have time for this, she said coldly,
facing the man. His face was partially obscured by the darkness,
but Faye could still see that he was extremely good looking. iIf
I were a younger, looser woman, I would probably have gasped when
I saw him.../i she thought, grinning to herself. iJust goes
to show that this isn't some cheesy dime romance novel./i/p
pThe stranger's grin widened slightly./p
pOh, come now, a woman as dazzling as yourself shouldn't
be out alone this late. There are some bad people out here, you
know, who would try to take advantage of such a beautiful young
woman as yourself. Perhaps I should accompany you... he
gave her what was probably intended to be a dashing smile./p
pIt was completely lost on Faye. If she had been in a better
mood, she might have played along, just for a bit. Right now,
though, she didn't really feel like dealing with this./p
pI'm older than I look she simply replied, and
turned around to walk away again./p
pYou can't be THAT much older...no old maid could have
such perfect white skin or...er...impressive figure.... he
was still following her, and Faye was becoming distinctly
annoyed./p
pLook, buddy, I'm under a lot of stress right now, and
can't be held responsible for my actions, Faye said
quietly, turning around again and putting one hand on her hip and
the other on the grip of her pistol. So I'm just gonna give
you one warning: go away and find someone else to pick up, or
risk getting shot right here in the middle of the street!
she stared coldly at him, daring him to say one more oily line./p
pThe man just looked at her face for a minute, then down to
where her hand rested on the butt of her gun, then back to her
face. She watched him carefully, hoping he was smart enough to
get the message and leave. /p
pFine, fine, I can see you aren't really my type
anyway... the man said, squaring his shoulders and looking
away. I was just trying to be helpful.... He looked
up again and grinned. I mean, a guy can't help but notice a
hot chick like you! Faye didn't say a word or let her icy
expression slip an inch as the man winked at her, turned, and
hurriedly walked off in the opposite direction./p
pAs soon as he was far enough away, Faye sighed, and walked on.
It was, she reflected, rather ironic that she should be hit on in
this particular place. How many years ago was it now? How long
had it been since.../p
pNo, I can't think about it. Not here anyway... she
said quietly to herself, wrapping her short red coat more closely
around her shoulders. For once, she wished she had brought a
larger garment. It was cold this time of year, on this part of
the planet. A bitter smile touched her lips. iWinter, a
fitting time of year for a journey like this...Spike probably
would have thought so too./i/p
pShe faltered for a moment in her hasty walk as his name came
to her mind. Now matter how hard she tried not to, she always
found herself thinking like that. It had been the reason she had
left the bebop, and the reason she had stopped working as a
bounty hunter./p
pBut that's all in the past...I have to just keep
moving, she said, continuing in her hurried walk. She was
almost to her destination: a burned out, abandoned building that
no one had ever had the guts or the funds to demolish. The upper
classes of Mars had fallen somewhat from their former glory after
the Red Dragon syndicate had been all but destroyed a little over
5 years ago. The papers at the time had said that in a major
coup, virtually all of the leaders had been killed, and the main
office destroyed. Faye knew better, but she didn't think it was
her job to tell anyone. She didn't even want to think about
herself it back when.../p
pNo! I am inot/i going to think about that!
Otherwise I'll never be able to do this... she raised a
hand to her face to brush away the spot of wetness that had
somehow gotten there. She couldn't break down yet, not when she
was so close.../p
pAs tense and out of sorts as she was as she continued her
brisk walk through the streets of the city, she occasionally took
note of the buildings she passed. Most were vacant and close to
falling over, but here and there a dim light could be seen where
a stray squatter had decided to try to find some shelter from the
winter night. As she drew closer to her target, however, the
occasional glints from the dingy broken windows became few and
fewer. The streets were empty, dark, and silent. iLike a
graveyard.../i She shook her head again, ino, no, NO! Stop
that! /iFaye squared her shoulders, and walked on, determined
not to think about anything until she was sure she was ready. /p
pFinally, she reached the front of the hulking structure,
wincing at the sheer volume of destruction. The main entrance was
a mess of twisted metal and cracked stone, and looking up Faye
could see several twisted girders silhouetted against the moonlit
sky like broken claws. iAnd to think one man caused all
this...I wish I could have been here to see it...to fight beside
him,... /ishe blinked, trying hard to keep her memories out.
After studying the entrance for a moment, she carefully moved the
bent doorframe aside and walked gingerly into the silent
building. Blinking in the darkness, even deeper than the night
outside, she pulled out her lighter and flicked on the tiny
flame. She almost dropped it at the scene that flashed to life
before her, and she was forced to shut her eyes for a moment to
collect herself. It wasn't like she'd never seen a dead body
before, but something about a skeleton half berried in twisted
metal.... For what seemed like the hundredth time that night, she
shook her head to clear it. Looking away from
the...spectacle...she managed to find the corridor that led to
the right, holding her lighter as far out ahead of her as she
could. The flame flickered and bounced as she walked, and a faint
scent of the gas that it burned occasionally washed over her. iA
single flame, trying to push out the darkness, but doomed to burn
out sooner or later, and leave it's owner stranded and helpless
in the dark.../i Fay shook her head, trying with some
difficulty to rid herself of such morbid thoughts. She had to do
what she came here for first, then she could cry all night if she
wanted to. iThat's what I need to keep telling myself, at
least./i She walked on down the hall, hoping the 7-year-old
schematic she'd found on the Web was still accurate. Sometimes,
she missed having Ed around to find things like that. Faye had
never really cared for computers, and especially not the Web. The
idea of losing oneself in a world that didn't even exist just
seemed so....futile./p
pFinally, she came to the doorway that was suppose to lead to
the stairs, and pushed hard on the handle. The heavy metal door
refused to budge, some heavy object barring it from the other
side. Gritting her teeth, Faye got a firm grip on the handle and
put down her lighter, plunging her into complete darkness. She
pushed with all her might on the door and handle, but after
several minutes of straining in the pitch black, it hadn't moved
an inch. /p
pCome on, move! she whispered harshly, standing
back and kicking the handle hard. /p
p she screamed, when it still refused to open,
and drew her pistol. Aiming in what she assumed was the direction
of the door, she began firing, taking out her hopeless
frustration on the inanimate sheet of metal that she couldn't
even see in the dark hallway. The metallic twang of the bullets
slicing through the thick metal was like thunder rolling though
the silent building, but Faye didn't care. After she emptied the
clip, she kept on pulling the trigger for a few minutes, then
fell heavily to the floor. She barely noticed the tears that were
now streaming down her face. If she couldn't reach the top floor
there was no point to her even coming here. /p
pAfter a few moments of sitting dejectedly, Faye realized that
she'd forgotten, in her outburst, what she'd done with her
lighter. She shakily got up and began to search the floor near
the door. After several moments of fumbling in the dark, she gave
up. Sitting back down, she was nearly ready to give up hope when
she noticed a faint light coming from just a little way down the
hall. Cautiously, reloading her pistol and keeping it handy, she
got up and walked towards it. After a moment or two, she rounded
a corner to find that the light was coming from behind a mangled
piece of metal set into the wall. Faye slowly approached, and
took a closer look. After a moment, she realized with a surge of
hope that it was the door of the elevator, and the light must be
coming from the elevator shaft. Usually, there was a ladder
inside an elevator shaft for emergencies, and it just might take
her all the way to the roof. Carefully, she maneuvered the heavy
door out of the way, and squatted down so she could see up
farther into the shaft. Soft blue light filtered down from the
apex, where the roof seemed to be missing, and the lower reaches
were lost in deep shadow. Faye didn't give the depths a second
thought, looking only up to where she needed to go. Keeping one
hand clenched tightly on the edge of the opening, she leaned out
into the space and tested the hand rails that went up the side of
the shaft. They seemed secure enough, and she lightly jumped out
into the shaft, grabbing hold of the rails with her other hand
and resting her feet on them as well. Slowly, carefully, she made
her way up the long shaft, painstakingly testing each rail before
trusting her weight to it. It wouldn't do for her to fall and die
so close to reaching her goal. As she made her slow, laborious
way up, she could see the night sky through the broken off
ceiling of the shaft. Every now and then the lights of a ship
could be seen passing by, but Faye hardly noticed. Finally, at
what must have been the 18th floor, she stopped to
rest a minute, and looked back down into the darkness she had
come from. iIt's like looking down into the underworld... /ishe
thought, iI've climbed up from hell. /iShe turned her gaze
to the open roof. iI wonder if heaven is waiting for me up
there? /iAs she thought about that, she felt her anticipation
intensify. She almost couldn't believe she was so close. iThis
is it, this is where I finally find my answer. /iShe looked
down again, closing her eyes against the endless seeming black
void. iThis is where I either find a shred of hope or a
universe of despair.../i /p
pSlowly, she began climbing up the elevator shaft again, trying
to calm her growing apprehension by thinking about how she came
to be here in the first place. When she had first heard of...the
incident...she hadn't been able to believe it, which was
something she had never quite understood. When he had left the
Bebop that last time, she had known what was going to happen to
him. She had known, she realized, for a long time. Spike simply
didn't care enough about wether he lived or died. After five
years of trying to figure it out, Faye still didn't entirely
understand why. She supposed it had something to do with Julia,
and Vicious, and the Red Dragons, but she'd never had the heart
to ask Jet about it before she'd left. Faye had still known,
though. That was why he she had begged him so desperately not to
leave that last time, but he'd gone anyway, presumably to meet
his destiny. iAfter all, he was in love with Julia, not me./i
After he left, she had resigned herself to it, and realized and
understood that it was all for Julia, his lost love. iWhat is
it with men and lost loves?/i And then...she had seen the
report about...it...on the web, and...something inside of her had
snapped, she supposed. For weeks afterward, she hadn't left her
room on the ship, even to eat. Her past coming back to her,
Spike....it was all too much. So she'd just hidden in her room,
trying to forget everything else. Faye's memory of that time was
hazy at best, but she remembered crying, sometimes, and not
sleeping often. Eventually, she'd come to her senses, somewhat,
and tried to go back to her old life. Jet had been quiet as she'd
gone about her business on the ship; she supposed he just didn't
have the heart to tell her to get lost. In the end, he hadn't
needed to anyway. One day, out of the blue, she'd simply taken
all of her ammo and loaded it into the Redtail, and left. She'd
come back to the Bebop before because it was the only place she
had to go. After Spike was gone, though, she'd realized that it
wasn't really the Bebop she'd needed, it was him. She had never
consciously thought, while he was still...working with her...that
she felt something for him. When he was suddenly gone, though,
she had realized how accustomed she had become to having him
around, how much she relied on him. In the haze of pain and
loneliness she found herself lost in, Faye had desperately needed
something to cling to, something to keep her going. She'd heard
all the news reports, she'd read all the papers, and all of them
had different reports. All of them had large numbers of
casualties for the event, but not one of them had mentioned a
person who fit Spike's description. Her confused, desperate mind
had taken this and run with it, and by the time she left the
Bebop, she had nearly managed to convince herself that he must be
alive. After getting away and trying to figure everything out,
she had realized that of course that was foolish; he couldn't
possibly have survived. No matter how many times she told herself
that, though, she could never really believe it. Finally, she had
decided that the only thing for it was to go to Mars and go to
the place where...it had all happened. It had taken her five
years to get up the nerve to come here, and now she was so close.
There might not be anything left on that top floor for her to
find, but she had to look. She had to see for herself. /p
piYou're hoping too much. You know that you won't see what
you want to,/i she berated herself as she climbed higher, her
arms beginning to strain in the chill air. /p
pAfter what seemed like hours of climbing, Faye finally reached
the end of the shaft. She looked up over the edge of the wall to
see the lights of city ranged about, and the high walls of the
terraformed valley looming darkly beyond them, lit here and there
with a warning light for incoming ships. Most of the area closest
to the building was dark, as though it had some sort of dark aura
that prevented the living from approaching it. /p
piHow fitting that I'm here. /iFaye though, smiling
bitterly, iAfter all, I'm just a walking ghost./i/p
pSlowly, she climbed up out of the hole, taking a moment to
look down into the shadows below her. The opening she had entered
by was lost in deep shadow now, and she doubted that she could
find it again. Not giving it a second thought, she turned to see
what was laid out before her. /p
pFrom what was left, the room seemed to have been some sort of
audience hall. There was a raised dias with stairs leading up to
it facing the area Faye was standing in, and the tattered remains
of fine carpets and curtains were strewn here and there. Slowly,
she walked towards the steps, shivering not just from the chill
wind whistling though the ragged remains of the room's walls. She
walked forward until she was nearly on the stairway, and there
she stopped, too shaken to move any farther. /p
pThere were no physical remains, at least. That would have
completely destroyed her. All that was left was a scrap of blue
fabric, pinned firmly under the butt of a weathered, rusted
pistol, lying on one of the steps. A person looking wouldn't even
have noticed it, but Faye did. And she knew, just from that, that
she had been right in the beginning, that all of her wild,
desperate hope had been in vain. And she had been hoping, she
realized, though she didn't know what she was hoping for. Slowly,
she sank to her knees, wrapping her arms tightly around her
waist. /p
pHe's....he's gone./p
pWhen the sun rose the next day, she was still there, still in
the same position./p
pbr
br
/p
pGlass hopes shatter easily./p
pbr
/p
pAN: Well, that's it so far. Rather sad, I suppose, but what
are ya gonna do? I do have a sort of plot, but it's rather
rudimentary right now. To tell the truth, this is the first
fanfic I've ever posted, I don't usually have the energy to write
fanfiction. (I'm more of an artist than a writer). But who knows,
I feel inspired. If you liked it, review so I'll have the
self-esteem to write more. Hell, if enough people like it, maybe
I'll turn it into a fan-manga. That might be fun. Although...then
I'd have to draw Faye in all her...er....undersized
outfit?..glory, and since I don't happen to be a guy....hmm...
Well, anyway, just tell me what you think. Yes, yes I know I'm
nuts. /p
pAuthor's note: This story takes place after the series ends,
it says how long in the story. There are no pairings. There are
no original characters who are named. (So far) There is no need
for any definitions of Japanese words, because Faye doesn't speak
Japanese. Yeah, just Faye. She's really the only character in
this fic, and if I do a whole story, she's gonna be the main
character. I suppose I identify with her a bit, she's in love
with a guy who doesn't really feel the same way. There's other
reasons too, I suppose, but I don't want to ramble too long. It
will suffice to say I have a lot more sympathy for Faye in the
second half of the sereis. If I get enough reviews, I might
continue, but I'm gonna say right now that Spike is NOT going to
ever appear in this. It's hardly that I don't like him, quite the
opposite. So lets let the poor guy rest in peace, huh? But I
digress. Insert the usual Don't own the characters or
setting, never will thing here. /p
pPrologue: Glass Hopes/p
p/p
pI close my eyes and I keep seein' things./p
pRainbow waterfalls, sunny liquid dreams./p
pConfusion creeps inside me rainin' down. /p
pGotta get to you, but I don't know how./p
p/p
pI had your number quite some time ago/p
pback when we were young, but I had to go/p
p10000 years I've searched it seems and now, /p
pgotta get to you, won't ya tell me how?/p
p/p
pWhat can I do? To get me to you?/p
piSelected Lyrics from Call me, Call me, from
the soundtrack CD Cowboy Bebop: Blue/i/p
pSunset on Mars isn't the same as sunset on Earth, or Ganymede,
or any other planet with a natural atmosphere. On Mars, where
only portions of the planet's surface are terraformed, it creeps
up on you. One minute, it's perfectly light. Then next thing you
know, it's suddenly deep twilight, and before you know it, it's
pitch black. The atmosphere's too thin to hold the light and
reflect it around for very long. /p
pAs Faye Valentine walked quickly along a darkening city
sidewalk, the scientific details of the rapidly approaching
darkness were just about the furthest thing from her mind. She
was a lot more concerned about the trouble it could cause her. At
night, a woman dressed the way she was walking alone down the
street looked like easy prey for the reptiles that stalked the
neither regions of this place. Not that Faye was afraid of
getting mugged, it was just that she was in a hurry and didn't
really feel like being bothered./p
piAnyone stupid enough to stop me tonight won't be around to
bother any other women, at least,/i Faye thought to herself
smiling slightly and letting her fingers brush across the grip of
her gun. /p
pBehind her, she heard the faint sound of a footstep. Not
turning around, she kept walking, idly hoping the person was just
some drunk. /p
pWell, what have we here? Lookin' for some company,
sweetheart? an deep, lyrical voice purred from the shadows
behind her. Faye squared her shoulders and kept walking. /p
pOh, so cold.... the voice was coming from right
behind her now, and Faye decided that it's owner wasn't planning
on leaving her alone. She stopped and let her hand drape loosely
across her holster before looking back at the deep voice's owner./p
pI don't have time for this, she said coldly,
facing the man. His face was partially obscured by the darkness,
but Faye could still see that he was extremely good looking. iIf
I were a younger, looser woman, I would probably have gasped when
I saw him.../i she thought, grinning to herself. iJust goes
to show that this isn't some cheesy dime romance novel./i/p
pThe stranger's grin widened slightly./p
pOh, come now, a woman as dazzling as yourself shouldn't
be out alone this late. There are some bad people out here, you
know, who would try to take advantage of such a beautiful young
woman as yourself. Perhaps I should accompany you... he
gave her what was probably intended to be a dashing smile./p
pIt was completely lost on Faye. If she had been in a better
mood, she might have played along, just for a bit. Right now,
though, she didn't really feel like dealing with this./p
pI'm older than I look she simply replied, and
turned around to walk away again./p
pYou can't be THAT much older...no old maid could have
such perfect white skin or...er...impressive figure.... he
was still following her, and Faye was becoming distinctly
annoyed./p
pLook, buddy, I'm under a lot of stress right now, and
can't be held responsible for my actions, Faye said
quietly, turning around again and putting one hand on her hip and
the other on the grip of her pistol. So I'm just gonna give
you one warning: go away and find someone else to pick up, or
risk getting shot right here in the middle of the street!
she stared coldly at him, daring him to say one more oily line./p
pThe man just looked at her face for a minute, then down to
where her hand rested on the butt of her gun, then back to her
face. She watched him carefully, hoping he was smart enough to
get the message and leave. /p
pFine, fine, I can see you aren't really my type
anyway... the man said, squaring his shoulders and looking
away. I was just trying to be helpful.... He looked
up again and grinned. I mean, a guy can't help but notice a
hot chick like you! Faye didn't say a word or let her icy
expression slip an inch as the man winked at her, turned, and
hurriedly walked off in the opposite direction./p
pAs soon as he was far enough away, Faye sighed, and walked on.
It was, she reflected, rather ironic that she should be hit on in
this particular place. How many years ago was it now? How long
had it been since.../p
pNo, I can't think about it. Not here anyway... she
said quietly to herself, wrapping her short red coat more closely
around her shoulders. For once, she wished she had brought a
larger garment. It was cold this time of year, on this part of
the planet. A bitter smile touched her lips. iWinter, a
fitting time of year for a journey like this...Spike probably
would have thought so too./i/p
pShe faltered for a moment in her hasty walk as his name came
to her mind. Now matter how hard she tried not to, she always
found herself thinking like that. It had been the reason she had
left the bebop, and the reason she had stopped working as a
bounty hunter./p
pBut that's all in the past...I have to just keep
moving, she said, continuing in her hurried walk. She was
almost to her destination: a burned out, abandoned building that
no one had ever had the guts or the funds to demolish. The upper
classes of Mars had fallen somewhat from their former glory after
the Red Dragon syndicate had been all but destroyed a little over
5 years ago. The papers at the time had said that in a major
coup, virtually all of the leaders had been killed, and the main
office destroyed. Faye knew better, but she didn't think it was
her job to tell anyone. She didn't even want to think about
herself it back when.../p
pNo! I am inot/i going to think about that!
Otherwise I'll never be able to do this... she raised a
hand to her face to brush away the spot of wetness that had
somehow gotten there. She couldn't break down yet, not when she
was so close.../p
pAs tense and out of sorts as she was as she continued her
brisk walk through the streets of the city, she occasionally took
note of the buildings she passed. Most were vacant and close to
falling over, but here and there a dim light could be seen where
a stray squatter had decided to try to find some shelter from the
winter night. As she drew closer to her target, however, the
occasional glints from the dingy broken windows became few and
fewer. The streets were empty, dark, and silent. iLike a
graveyard.../i She shook her head again, ino, no, NO! Stop
that! /iFaye squared her shoulders, and walked on, determined
not to think about anything until she was sure she was ready. /p
pFinally, she reached the front of the hulking structure,
wincing at the sheer volume of destruction. The main entrance was
a mess of twisted metal and cracked stone, and looking up Faye
could see several twisted girders silhouetted against the moonlit
sky like broken claws. iAnd to think one man caused all
this...I wish I could have been here to see it...to fight beside
him,... /ishe blinked, trying hard to keep her memories out.
After studying the entrance for a moment, she carefully moved the
bent doorframe aside and walked gingerly into the silent
building. Blinking in the darkness, even deeper than the night
outside, she pulled out her lighter and flicked on the tiny
flame. She almost dropped it at the scene that flashed to life
before her, and she was forced to shut her eyes for a moment to
collect herself. It wasn't like she'd never seen a dead body
before, but something about a skeleton half berried in twisted
metal.... For what seemed like the hundredth time that night, she
shook her head to clear it. Looking away from
the...spectacle...she managed to find the corridor that led to
the right, holding her lighter as far out ahead of her as she
could. The flame flickered and bounced as she walked, and a faint
scent of the gas that it burned occasionally washed over her. iA
single flame, trying to push out the darkness, but doomed to burn
out sooner or later, and leave it's owner stranded and helpless
in the dark.../i Fay shook her head, trying with some
difficulty to rid herself of such morbid thoughts. She had to do
what she came here for first, then she could cry all night if she
wanted to. iThat's what I need to keep telling myself, at
least./i She walked on down the hall, hoping the 7-year-old
schematic she'd found on the Web was still accurate. Sometimes,
she missed having Ed around to find things like that. Faye had
never really cared for computers, and especially not the Web. The
idea of losing oneself in a world that didn't even exist just
seemed so....futile./p
pFinally, she came to the doorway that was suppose to lead to
the stairs, and pushed hard on the handle. The heavy metal door
refused to budge, some heavy object barring it from the other
side. Gritting her teeth, Faye got a firm grip on the handle and
put down her lighter, plunging her into complete darkness. She
pushed with all her might on the door and handle, but after
several minutes of straining in the pitch black, it hadn't moved
an inch. /p
pCome on, move! she whispered harshly, standing
back and kicking the handle hard. /p
p she screamed, when it still refused to open,
and drew her pistol. Aiming in what she assumed was the direction
of the door, she began firing, taking out her hopeless
frustration on the inanimate sheet of metal that she couldn't
even see in the dark hallway. The metallic twang of the bullets
slicing through the thick metal was like thunder rolling though
the silent building, but Faye didn't care. After she emptied the
clip, she kept on pulling the trigger for a few minutes, then
fell heavily to the floor. She barely noticed the tears that were
now streaming down her face. If she couldn't reach the top floor
there was no point to her even coming here. /p
pAfter a few moments of sitting dejectedly, Faye realized that
she'd forgotten, in her outburst, what she'd done with her
lighter. She shakily got up and began to search the floor near
the door. After several moments of fumbling in the dark, she gave
up. Sitting back down, she was nearly ready to give up hope when
she noticed a faint light coming from just a little way down the
hall. Cautiously, reloading her pistol and keeping it handy, she
got up and walked towards it. After a moment or two, she rounded
a corner to find that the light was coming from behind a mangled
piece of metal set into the wall. Faye slowly approached, and
took a closer look. After a moment, she realized with a surge of
hope that it was the door of the elevator, and the light must be
coming from the elevator shaft. Usually, there was a ladder
inside an elevator shaft for emergencies, and it just might take
her all the way to the roof. Carefully, she maneuvered the heavy
door out of the way, and squatted down so she could see up
farther into the shaft. Soft blue light filtered down from the
apex, where the roof seemed to be missing, and the lower reaches
were lost in deep shadow. Faye didn't give the depths a second
thought, looking only up to where she needed to go. Keeping one
hand clenched tightly on the edge of the opening, she leaned out
into the space and tested the hand rails that went up the side of
the shaft. They seemed secure enough, and she lightly jumped out
into the shaft, grabbing hold of the rails with her other hand
and resting her feet on them as well. Slowly, carefully, she made
her way up the long shaft, painstakingly testing each rail before
trusting her weight to it. It wouldn't do for her to fall and die
so close to reaching her goal. As she made her slow, laborious
way up, she could see the night sky through the broken off
ceiling of the shaft. Every now and then the lights of a ship
could be seen passing by, but Faye hardly noticed. Finally, at
what must have been the 18th floor, she stopped to
rest a minute, and looked back down into the darkness she had
come from. iIt's like looking down into the underworld... /ishe
thought, iI've climbed up from hell. /iShe turned her gaze
to the open roof. iI wonder if heaven is waiting for me up
there? /iAs she thought about that, she felt her anticipation
intensify. She almost couldn't believe she was so close. iThis
is it, this is where I finally find my answer. /iShe looked
down again, closing her eyes against the endless seeming black
void. iThis is where I either find a shred of hope or a
universe of despair.../i /p
pSlowly, she began climbing up the elevator shaft again, trying
to calm her growing apprehension by thinking about how she came
to be here in the first place. When she had first heard of...the
incident...she hadn't been able to believe it, which was
something she had never quite understood. When he had left the
Bebop that last time, she had known what was going to happen to
him. She had known, she realized, for a long time. Spike simply
didn't care enough about wether he lived or died. After five
years of trying to figure it out, Faye still didn't entirely
understand why. She supposed it had something to do with Julia,
and Vicious, and the Red Dragons, but she'd never had the heart
to ask Jet about it before she'd left. Faye had still known,
though. That was why he she had begged him so desperately not to
leave that last time, but he'd gone anyway, presumably to meet
his destiny. iAfter all, he was in love with Julia, not me./i
After he left, she had resigned herself to it, and realized and
understood that it was all for Julia, his lost love. iWhat is
it with men and lost loves?/i And then...she had seen the
report about...it...on the web, and...something inside of her had
snapped, she supposed. For weeks afterward, she hadn't left her
room on the ship, even to eat. Her past coming back to her,
Spike....it was all too much. So she'd just hidden in her room,
trying to forget everything else. Faye's memory of that time was
hazy at best, but she remembered crying, sometimes, and not
sleeping often. Eventually, she'd come to her senses, somewhat,
and tried to go back to her old life. Jet had been quiet as she'd
gone about her business on the ship; she supposed he just didn't
have the heart to tell her to get lost. In the end, he hadn't
needed to anyway. One day, out of the blue, she'd simply taken
all of her ammo and loaded it into the Redtail, and left. She'd
come back to the Bebop before because it was the only place she
had to go. After Spike was gone, though, she'd realized that it
wasn't really the Bebop she'd needed, it was him. She had never
consciously thought, while he was still...working with her...that
she felt something for him. When he was suddenly gone, though,
she had realized how accustomed she had become to having him
around, how much she relied on him. In the haze of pain and
loneliness she found herself lost in, Faye had desperately needed
something to cling to, something to keep her going. She'd heard
all the news reports, she'd read all the papers, and all of them
had different reports. All of them had large numbers of
casualties for the event, but not one of them had mentioned a
person who fit Spike's description. Her confused, desperate mind
had taken this and run with it, and by the time she left the
Bebop, she had nearly managed to convince herself that he must be
alive. After getting away and trying to figure everything out,
she had realized that of course that was foolish; he couldn't
possibly have survived. No matter how many times she told herself
that, though, she could never really believe it. Finally, she had
decided that the only thing for it was to go to Mars and go to
the place where...it had all happened. It had taken her five
years to get up the nerve to come here, and now she was so close.
There might not be anything left on that top floor for her to
find, but she had to look. She had to see for herself. /p
piYou're hoping too much. You know that you won't see what
you want to,/i she berated herself as she climbed higher, her
arms beginning to strain in the chill air. /p
pAfter what seemed like hours of climbing, Faye finally reached
the end of the shaft. She looked up over the edge of the wall to
see the lights of city ranged about, and the high walls of the
terraformed valley looming darkly beyond them, lit here and there
with a warning light for incoming ships. Most of the area closest
to the building was dark, as though it had some sort of dark aura
that prevented the living from approaching it. /p
piHow fitting that I'm here. /iFaye though, smiling
bitterly, iAfter all, I'm just a walking ghost./i/p
pSlowly, she climbed up out of the hole, taking a moment to
look down into the shadows below her. The opening she had entered
by was lost in deep shadow now, and she doubted that she could
find it again. Not giving it a second thought, she turned to see
what was laid out before her. /p
pFrom what was left, the room seemed to have been some sort of
audience hall. There was a raised dias with stairs leading up to
it facing the area Faye was standing in, and the tattered remains
of fine carpets and curtains were strewn here and there. Slowly,
she walked towards the steps, shivering not just from the chill
wind whistling though the ragged remains of the room's walls. She
walked forward until she was nearly on the stairway, and there
she stopped, too shaken to move any farther. /p
pThere were no physical remains, at least. That would have
completely destroyed her. All that was left was a scrap of blue
fabric, pinned firmly under the butt of a weathered, rusted
pistol, lying on one of the steps. A person looking wouldn't even
have noticed it, but Faye did. And she knew, just from that, that
she had been right in the beginning, that all of her wild,
desperate hope had been in vain. And she had been hoping, she
realized, though she didn't know what she was hoping for. Slowly,
she sank to her knees, wrapping her arms tightly around her
waist. /p
pHe's....he's gone./p
pWhen the sun rose the next day, she was still there, still in
the same position./p
pbr
br
/p
pGlass hopes shatter easily./p
pbr
/p
pAN: Well, that's it so far. Rather sad, I suppose, but what
are ya gonna do? I do have a sort of plot, but it's rather
rudimentary right now. To tell the truth, this is the first
fanfic I've ever posted, I don't usually have the energy to write
fanfiction. (I'm more of an artist than a writer). But who knows,
I feel inspired. If you liked it, review so I'll have the
self-esteem to write more. Hell, if enough people like it, maybe
I'll turn it into a fan-manga. That might be fun. Although...then
I'd have to draw Faye in all her...er....undersized
outfit?..glory, and since I don't happen to be a guy....hmm...
Well, anyway, just tell me what you think. Yes, yes I know I'm
nuts. /p