Chapter 1
"The high school has lost its funding for science teachers," Ms. Bitters announced, "Instead, you will have a disgruntled elementary teacher."
Dib felt sick. He noticed some familiar faces in the room and wondered why Zim was not among them. Dib hadn't seen Zim for two weeks now. What could that alien be up to? The blue and purple 'house' had disappeared and nothing remained except one plush-toy moose.
Ms. Bitters called on Sarah who gasped and heaved, "Ms. Bitters, I think I'm going to have a baby soon. May I go see the nurse?"
Ms. Bitters frowned at Sarah's bloated figure and growled, "Oh, alright. But you have ten minutes, so make it quick."
The old woman had grown older, more scarred and hunchbacked, and she motioned Sarah to take a block of lead with the words 'Hall Pass' engraved on it. Ms. Bitters shot a bitter look around the room, "Anyone else have problems?"
Mathers, with greedy hands, sniffed some cocaine. He sighed but abruptly realized that the drug did not work. He repeatedly injected his veins with more drugs but to no avail. He raised his hole marked arm, "Ms. Bitters, this cocaine hasn't induced me into a coma yet. I think I need counseling."
"No," Ms. Bitters said, "That one's not going to work this time. We lost funding for counselors a long time ago."
"Aw, Ms. Bitters. How about the nurse then?" Mathers suddenly convulsed and slumped into his seat in a coma.
How long must this go on? Dib wondered as he drew detailed pictures of Zim's anatomy.
Retchie puked again and the room smelled like poop…Poop Beer, that is. Retchie's retch always distracted Ms. Bitters. Someone took advantage of that to light a lighter and set their desk on fire. Meanwhile Penny giggled as she and a long-haired kid twisted in a mad and salivating embrace.
The door opened. Ms. Bitters stopped to stare.