I own nothing copyrighted.
WARNING: Just like with all of my writing, there will be foul language, adult situations, violence, and quite possibly the return of my beloved catapults if I can work them in. If you are underage, move along.
A/N: Just to let everyone know, this is just a story that I began playing around with in my head. Don't expect regular updates because I have real life bullshit going on up to my eyeballs right now. I'm using writing as therapy, please don't start harassing me for more regular updates, that just puts more pressure on me than I can deal with at the moment.
Please give this a read and tell me what you think an account I'm kind of making it up as I go. Thanks. Oh, and sorry for the bad mood, it's been an issue lately.
Black Swan
Chapter One
~Bella Swan-Black~
Edmund's golden eyes fall closed, reveling in the warmth of his beloved's hand upon his cheek, "I love you so much Bailey," he purrs, his voice like melted chocolate.
Bailey breathes a soft sigh, "I love you too Edmund, forever...."
"Mom, we're home!" accompanies the door slam that causes the entire 14 X 70 foot trailer that is my home to shudder.
"I'm right here in the kitchen Seth, you don't need to yell," I grumble, quickly saving my writing and shutting the laptop.
In bounces two fourteen year old teenagers with matching dark eyes and ink black hair. You would think that they were both boys, the way they are dressed, except for the fact that one of them has their hair in two long braids. My babies, the only thing I've done right in my life since graduating high school.
"What's for dinner mommy-dearest?" my daughter asks as she and her twin brother unceremoniously drop their back packs by the kitchen table, "Please tell me it's not meatloaf, I hate meatloaf."
"It's not meatloaf Leah," I assure her as I heft myself up from my chair. Oh what I wouldn't give to have the body I had when I was seventeen. Too bad my metabolism decided to quit on me and my thyroid went insane, now aside from having frizzy auburn hair and muddy brown eyes, I have the body of a baby whale. Yay for me.
Seth catches my expression before I can cover it and quickly wraps his arms around my shoulders. I swear these two have grown a foot since the school year began. What is the school feeding the freshmen class? It's downright embarrassing to have your kids taller than you.
"Has anyone told you that you're beautiful today mom?" his voice interrupts my thoughts.
I roll my eyes but give him a kiss on the cheek, "Someone just did," I give him a quick squeeze and push him towards the table, "Do your homework now that you've successfully sucked up to mom. The roast will be done in about an hour."
The familiar shuffling commences as the twins dig into their homework and I start making a salad. I turn on my cheap mp3 player and connect it to the surround sound so we have some music to work to.
"Is dad coming home tonight?" Leah suddenly asks as I am rifling through the cupboards to find the shelled sunflower seeds.
"I don't know sweetheart, him and the guys have been putting in a lot of over time at the station," I confess, only half lying to my child.
~*~flashback 6 months~*~
For the past four months Jake has been getting home later and later and it has nothing to do with the pack or his duties at the police station. I wouldn't have thought anything was going on until Charlie, preparing to finally retire as sheriff, had called one night to see if Jake could come in and help him with a few things. When I told my dad that he hadn't made it home yet, Charlie was confused but accepting when I said that he was probably out with Sam and the guys.
After hanging up with him I had immediately called Sam to see if there was anything going on with the pack and he had admitted that he didn't think so, but he'd check it out and get back to me. Two hours later, Embry had called and choked out that he'd seen my husband with a redhead up around Port Angeles earlier. I politely asked him to keep the information to himself and went back to making dinner.
When Jake got home that night, I'd kept my mouth shut, but I could smell the faint scent of perfume on him. I never wore perfume, he said it bothered his sensitive werewolf nose, so it had to have come from some outside source. No wonder we hadn't been intimate for half a year, he'd been going to someone else.
Two week later, I asked Sue and Charlie to watched the monsters while I ran some errands. Sue was thrilled, never having children of her own, and Charlie never passed up an opportunity to spend time with his grandchildren. With that taken care of, I was careful to take a shower with some new soap and dress in clothes that were right off the rack before grabbing my keys and my helmet and riding up to Port Angeles.
It took me an hour to find them, walking down the sidewalk, hand in hand. To a complete stranger they would look like a nice couple, her flaming red hair and alabaster skin contrasting beautifully against his raven hair and russet skin. To a wife who has endured perpetual poverty and countless nights alone because her husband is a werewolf, it was the most vile thing I've ever seen.
I'd stumbled back to my bike, after expelling the contents of my stomach, and drove at insane speeds back to the reservation, my tears making everything one continuous blur. I'm so lucky that I didn't hurt myself or anyone else that night.
When Jake had finally stumbled in, he mumbled something about a crash on the highway and went straight to bed. The cheating in itself hurt, but what really shattered my love for my husband was that it had been our wedding anniversary and he had spent it with another woman.
There are three reasons I had decided to keep my mouth shut. Leah and Seth were two of them. The third reason was the I refused to let us become Charlie and Renee.
~*~flashback end~*~
I drop the bag of sunflower seeds on to the counter and glance at the calender. January 18th. Huh. The day I met Edward Cullen, the man who would forever hold a big piece of my heart. In eighteen years that hasn't changed.
~*~flashback 18 years~*~
My second day at Forks High. Meh. I think I hate Tuesdays now as much as I hate Mondays. At least the novelty of my abrupt appearance has begun to wear off. My morning is still just as painful though, damn migraine, has to be from all the mold that blooms from the ever present dampness in the god forsaken place.
I'm sitting with my head buried in my arms, trying to tune out the incessant babble going on at the lunch table, when Jessica, I think her name is, grabs my arm and squeals.
"Oh my god! It's the Cullens! They're back!" she squawks, making me want to ram my back pack in her mouth just so I don't have to hear her voice any more.
"Who are the Cullens?" I ask as I lift my head, mainly because I know she is going to tell me whether I want to know or not.
"They moved here from Alaska a few years ago," the tall girl, Angela explains in her timid voice, "The blonde model is Rosalie, the little dark haired girl is Alice, and the bronzed haired, dreamy looking guy is their brother, Edward."
"They were all adopted by Doctor and Mrs. Cullen," Jessica interjects, "But I would keep my distance if I were you, they think they're too good for anyone around here." It makes me wonder how many times she's been turned down by the boy.
"I wonder if they'd adopt me," Angela jokes as we watch them situate themselves at a table away from the other students.
In that moment, Edward looks in our direction and our eyes connect. The world seems to fall away. The annoying din of the overcrowded lunchroom retreats and the only thing in the world is him and I. I feel my blood pulsing in my ears and my heart pounding furiously in my chest. For the first time in my life, I know someone sees me. Then he smiles.
'Hi' his perfect lips mouth silently while still curled up into a mischievous grin.
'Hi' I mouth back, the heat coming off of my cheeks enough to warm the room for the winter.
He nods his chin towards the exit 'Come outside with me?'
I bob my head once, agreeing, and toss my bag over my shoulder before following the most beautiful boy I've ever seen out into the cold January day.
~*~flashback end~*~
I draw a ragged breath and push the image of the bronze haired, green eyed angel out of my head. It's not his fault that his adopted father was chosen to go to Italy and work with some of the most prestigious and affluent doctors on the planet on my eighteenth birthday. It wasn't Edward's fault that three days later, he left my life forever.
"I have to go over to Sam and Emily's tonight," Leah lilts as she drops the last of her books back into her bag, "I promised them last week that I would watch Billy for them."
"Who's coming to get you?" I inquire as I hand her a plate full of food.
"Emily is," my daughter reveals in between bites, "I told her that dad still hasn't got the Rabbit fixed. She said that either her or Sam would bring me home in the morning."
"Can I go over too?" Seth asks, his dark eyes eager. He never passes up a chance to rough house with the wolves when they stop by.
"I'm sure your sister could use the help, chasing a hyperactive four year old around," I chuckle. Billy is a handful, but adores Leah. I also think watching the young boy makes her and Seth feel closer to Jake's dad, who passed just a month before his namesake was born.
Almost as soon as they're finished with dinner, I hear a car horn signaling Emily's arrival. I receive a swift kiss from each child as they bolt out the door. I follow them out on to the screened-in porch and give a little wave as Emily turns the car around and starts back up the lane. I wait until the tail lights have faded from sight before returning to the tedious duty of cleaning up the kitchen.
Four hours and a phone call from Renee later, I'm staring at my laptop, snickering at a review for the latest chapter of my fan fiction story from someone named Coppertop. I always pay attention when they review because the person is forever giving me little hints on how to write better while praising the inane babbling I call writing. In the past few weeks, our messages have slowly become less about writing and more about our lives.
I just hit the button to reply when the front door swings open and a 6' 7" Indian stomps in the door.
"Where are the kids?" Jacob absently inquires as he takes his jacket off and hangs it on one of the hooks by the door.
I close the laptop and set it on the coffee table, "They are at Sam and Emily's watching Billy. I thought you were on patrol tonight and figured one of the pack would tell you."
He ducks into the kitchen and I hear him getting his plate of food and a beer from the fridge, "I switched with Embry. I was hoping to have a night with them."
I shrug as he passes me and drops onto the couch, "I tried calling the station but Mark said you'd already left."
"I went to the junkyard to try and find that part for the Rabbit," he offers in explanation, "This roast is dry, what did you do to it?"
"It's dry because you were supposed to be home almost five hour ago," I growl in return, preparing for the inevitable argument, "And, as usual, you didn't bother calling to tell me that you would be late."
He sighs and drops his plate onto the coffee table then turns to glare at me, "Well, if you're whiny ass could keep a job for more than a few months, I wouldn't have to be pulling extra shifts to keep the bills paid, now would I?"
I get to my feet, "Don't you dare blame me for this Jacob Black! If you would actually let me buy a car that runs for more than a few weeks at a time, I wouldn't have lost all of those jobs! Besides, the kids need at least one parent that cares whether they are being fed and clothed or not!"
Jake jumps to his feet and moves so that he towers over me, "Goddamit Bella, everything I do is for those kids!"
"Really Jake? Everything?" I snort sarcastically, "So where does the redhead you've been screwing for almost a year now factor into bettering Seth and Leah's lives? Going to toss away the fat wife and give them a mommy that has the body of a supermodel?"
His tanned face suddenly crumples and he drops to his knees like I had kicked him in the stomach, "It's not like that Bells. No one in the world could be a better mother to them than you." He buries his face in his hands, "This is all my fault."
"You're damn right it's your fault," I snap even though seeing him like this reminds me of the seventeen year old I married in my quest to forget what could have been and would never be, "You threw away our whole life together for a fresh piece of ass, you fucking monster."
He drops his head into his calloused hands, "I'm so sorry Bella. I tried to stay away from her, but it's impossible. Please forgive me, I never meant to hurt you like this, but she's my imprint. I love her more than my own life."
"I want a divorce," I hear myself command in an icy cold voice.
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