I do not own The Legend of Zelda or it's characters or storylines. If I did, I think I would be a bit more wealthy and would most likely not be spending time writting and posting fanfiction. But, as that is not the case...well here I am, and here is the prologue, or "Pro-low-goo" as i like to call it.

Years after the events following Link's defeat of Ganon and saving of Hyrule, the castle became a historic landmark and tourist attraction. However, the novelty of an old building did not last long and construction was soon underway for the Hyrule mall and mini golf.

A Hyrule historian became owner of all the relics, treasures and documents that told of the Legends of Zelda, and he resides in the country side still upset about the "updates" being done to the castle he built his career around. But a surprise awaits him for a dirty looking Goron working at the construction site is carrying a box of papers on his way to him…

The construction goron approached the hut that seemed to be in the middle of nowhere and knocked on the door. He was anxious to be back at the castle. He was used to heat, but Hyrule field was just too much midday. A few long seconds passed and there was no anwer. He knocked on the door again.

The curtains over the window swayed to reveal a bitter looking old man peering at him. The goron blinked and said, "Anyone home?"

"Piss off!" Rang a voice from inside.

The goron was surprised for a moment. He walked across Hyrlue field for this? He sighed and said "Are you the historian? I was told to give this box of crap to you."

"What's in it?" Came the voice again.

The goron assumed this was indeed the historian. "Papers and stuff. Do you want it? Because if you don't, we just ran out of toilet paper at the construction site and-"

He was interrupted. "Drop the damn box!"

The goron quickly let go of the box and it landed on the doorstep with a thud. The door opened and the historian quickly dragged the box inside. The man was crinkled looking and short. Glasses sat on the tip of his long pointed nose and his eyes, hair, and lengthy beard were the same shade of gray. The goron held out his hand hopefully.

The historian looked infuriated. He grabbed the first thing by the door, which happened to be toilet paper and flung it at the visitor. "You want a tip! There's your damn tip, you ungrateful history ruining bastard!"

The goron was surprised by the man rudeness once more, but then realized the value of what had just hit him in the face. "Thanks man, I owe you one. I tell you what; tree bark was just not cutting it as toilet paper. There's nothing that can replace the whiping power of this double ply maximum absorbancey fairy woven toilet paper."

The historian was getting aggravated. The guy just didn't know when to leave. He grabbed his gun and opened the door

The goron looked at the barrel of the gun amused for a second. It was quite obvious this was a toy gun from the brightly colored pink plastic. He rolled his eyes and turned to leave. "God, fine, I'm leaving. There's no need to be a bitch about it."

The short and wizened historian slammed the door and turned to the box, giving it curious looks. This could very well be another legend yet to be told. He slowly opened the box and took out the bundle of papers and noticed a small note attached to them. He took the note and read it.

To whoever finds these papers,

First off, why the hell are you digging in the moat? Second, how are you digging in the moat without drowning? I have the only Zora tunic left; I saw that all the others were destroyed. Well…I suppose there is the chance the moat could dry up…maybe this wasn't the best idea… Anyway, these documents contain the actual legends as they were really written…well one anyway; I accidentally burned the others…hmm, I could have done that to this one too…nah, that'd be too obvious. See, I didn't like the way I was portrayed in the actual documents in the castle, so I stole the real ones and rewrote them. And those are the ones in the castle now. You know, I was thinking, don't you think those legends would make great games?

Sincerely,

Link

The historian gaped at the note in shock. The documents he studied throughout his career had been written by the actual Link…they also weren't the true legends. Link had dressed them up in his favor. Now intrigued, he turned to the papers and began reading…

First chapter coming soon!