A/N: I don't own any of this. Just a quick one shot about the moment after Rick finds out that Kate never forgot the moments after she was shot.

The Glass Parade

"You wanna know why I lied to you? Because how I feel about you scares the shit out of me Rick," Kate Beckett all but screamed. There was a waiver in her voice that made Castle stop and turn back toward her. He looked broken and she hated herself for breaking him. She couldn't imagine herself looking much better at the moment. It wasn't supposed to happen like this. He wasn't supposed to find out this way.

"Were you ever going to tell me?" he asked, his voice rough with grief. She answered without hesitation and with all the certainty she could muster.

"Yes."

He nodded once, but she still couldn't read his face. He was too far away and she really wanted to out of the hallway and into her apartment. His eyes were fixed at some point over her right shoulder. Tears were threatening with every breath she took. It felt like they had been standing there, not looking at each other, for hours. She wasn't sure what else she trusted herself to say.

Kate heard a heavy sigh escape from Rick and looked up to see him turning back toward the elevator. Her heart clenched painfully. She couldn't let him leave without knowing...

"Please don't," she begged. There was no stopping the tears now. They flowed freely from her red-rimmed eyes, a desperate sob breaking free. Before she could catch her breath she felt his hands framing her face hastily swiping the moisture from her cheeks. She leaned forward pressing her forehead into his chest and breathing deeply. She wanted nothing more than to just give in to everything she'd been fighting for three years, but she wasn't sure he even wanted her anymore. Without a word Rick slid his hand into hers and pulled her into her apartment, shutting the door behind him. He dropped her hand as soon as they'd crossed the threshold.

"Do you want something to drink?" She asked.

"Kate..." He said, a warning lacing his tone. He wasn't about to let anything go. She couldn't blame him. If it were the other way around she'd want answers too.

"I don't know what you want me to say Castle."

"I wanna know what you're so afraid of?" He pleaded. She contemplated him a moment. He looked as desperate as she felt. She told him she needed to solve her mom's case first. After their conversation on the swings she was sure he had understood what that meant. Apparently not.

"You're the best thing that's ever happened to me. I-I don't want to lose you. I'm broken and I'm going to end up hurting you," she tried to explain.

"You're hurting me right now Kate," he whispered. Her eyes slid shut, trying to suppress the new wave of tears forming behind her eye lids.

"I'm sorry," she sobbed. "I don't want to." She turned quickly toward the sink, trying to hide her seemingly uncontrollable crying. Only this man could shake her so completely. If the pain wasn't so consuming she'd be angry with herself for losing control.

It was suddenly too quiet. But before she could even think that he may have left, she felt arms encircling her waist. He pulled her tightly into his warm solid chest burying his nose in her hair.

"You're not broken," he spoke into her neck. "You're perfect. And I'm not going anywhere. Ever." His voice was horse with his own salty tears. Without looking back Kate reached her hand up to his cheek finding it was wet as hers. He turned his face into her palm, placing a soft kiss in the center of it. "I wasn't asking for anything in return Kate, I just needed you to know...that I love you," he finished and then stepped away from her.

Kate felt like her knees were going to buckle. She suddenly began to panic. Her heart beat wildly against her ribs. What if she never solved her mom's case? What if he met someone who actually deserved him.? She couldn't even imagine a life where he wasn't a huge part of it. As he moved away from her toward the front door she felt him slipping away emotionally as well.

"Rick," she said grabbing his hand. He looked down at their hands and then slowly back at her face. She tugged on his hand until his chest was an inch away from hers. She could see a question forming on his lips. So before he could voice it she sealed her mouth to his. He stilled momentarily before relaxing and moving his lips with hers. He groaned into her mouth as she open herself up to him. Their tongues slid across one another sending a jolt through her entire body. He pushed her back until she hit the counter and pressed the entire length of his body against hers. She moaned at the contact, weaving her hands into his soft hair. They broke, both panting and in need of oxygen. Castle's eyes were squeezed shut.

It may have been incredibly selfish of her but she couldn't wait anymore. She never really wanted to in the first place. So she pushed herself up onto her tip toes and pressed her lips firmly against his.

"I love you too," she whispered across his lips.