Disclaimer: I don't own the song "Back to December". It belongs to Taylor Swift. I don't own the Harry Potter Series. It belongs to Jo Kathleen Rowling.
Warning: The song Back to December was my inspiration for this fic, hence the title. This fic is in flashback format. Be warned that the stanzas aren't in original order. But nevertheless, the song is completely inserted in the story. Also, there are some changes I made on the original situation in the HP book. I hope you don't mind that, after all, this is a fanfic. :D This turned out longer than I expected so I split it up into parts. But it is still one songfic only. Enjoy, read and review.
PS: Things might get you confused for now but trust me, everything will fall into place and every single detail will make sense as you read the next chapters.
Back to December
By: Taylor Swift
A songfic by: Mieux-Mystery-Otaku
It was a breezy, starry night of October when Lily Evans tensely went out the door of Frank Longbottom's house into the empty front garden while clutching a glass of fire whiskey. It was a night of celebration for everybody, mainly for Frank and Alice. That night, they were celebrating their engagement. Frank had recently proposed to Alice and asked for her hand in marriage. She gladly said yes. The booming of music from inside the house and loud chatting of everyone invited to the party could be heard up to the garden. Yes, surely, it was a night of celebration for everybody-everybody, except her.
Don't get her wrong, she was happy for Alice. Why wouldn't she be? They were best friends, after all. As far as being happy for her best friend was concerned, she truly was happy for her. But she wasn't just in the mood for partying.
Her grip on the glass of fire whiskey tightened. She tried to mute every sound she was hearing everywhere. But there was one sound that she could not tune out-the sound of her heartbeat. The sound of her heartbeat boomed and rang in her ears even louder than the celebratory noise inside the house. She was frantic, tensed, nervous and scared. Why? It was because of only one reason. She was nervous about seeing one man.
No, it wasn't Voldemort, if that's what you're thinking. She didn't have a care about Voldemort during that moment. Surely, Voldemort wouldn't come. The house was full of Order members and even Dumbledore himself was present. Even though Voldemort was stupid and cruel, he wasn't dumb enough to let himself walk into a visible trap. It wasn't Voldemort she was nervous about seeing, it was James Potter.
It felt ironic for her that she was tensed about seeing James-while she wasn't scared of Voldemort-whereas he was still the gentlest man she had ever met. She was nervous about seeing him not because he would hurt her. Actually, she thought it was the other way around. She was afraid to meet him again because of the situation they were in. They had never seen each other for a long time and their last meeting wasn't really what you'd call a cheerful meeting. She was afraid to see what he was now and how he would act in front of her. But nevertheless, before she came to the party, she already knew that he would come and she had already prepared herself mentally. Despite the sure awkwardness that would ensue between them, she had to talk to him. She just had to.
As if on cue, the front gate's hinges screeched. The gate swung outwards, a sure sign that someone had opened it.
Lily, who was staring at her feet all this time, looked up at the new arrival. She felt her heart skip a beat when her eyes found James Potter. She instantly stood up from her sitting position in one of the concrete benches near the playing fountain. But it seemed that James didn't see, or worse, purposely ignored her.
"J-James." Lily stammered. It felt strange to say his name once again after a long time of avoiding even thinking about him.
James Potter was slightly startled when a familiar voice called out his name. He turned his head towards the benches and was not surprised to see Lily standing there. After all, the voice was so familiar to him. How many times had he dreamed about hearing her voice say his name again? Well, too many to count.
"L-Lily?"
Lily gave an awkward smile. "C-c-can we talk, please?"
James felt his heart throbbing against his ribs. His hand was shaking as he pondered whether he'd talk to her or not. After that last night they had seen each other several months before, James had been traumatized. Being ignored by Lily for years, he could take. But hearing her say that she didn't love him after months of being together was too much for James. Needless to say, his guard was already up. He was afraid to feel the sharp stab to his heart once again. He had to be careful in talking to her now. Actually, he could just tell Lily that they couldn't talk if he didn't want to. She gave him that chance to turn her down. That was obvious because she used the word "can" and not the words "have to". He could easily say that he wouldn't be staying long and would just congratulate Frank and Alice. But he didn't. He felt that there was something keeping him from walking away. He had to talk to her. Or she had to talk to him. Either way, he couldn't feel the courage to turn her down purposely. He felt his voice break as he replied. "Errrm. Okay, but I'll go inside first. I-I'll let them know I'm already here."
Lily nodded gently and sat back down at the bench. "I'll just be here."
With another awkward nod, James continued his walk towards the door and disappeared behind it.
Lily waited for a few minutes, occasionally taking deep breaths to calm her nerves and wringing her hands in an attempt to stop it from shaking.
I'm so glad you made time to see me.
How's life, tell me how's your family.
I haven't seen them in a while.
You've been good, busier then ever,
We small talk, work and the weather.
Your guard is up and I know why…
After a few minutes, the door opened, yellowish light came streaming from inside the house. James came out with a glass of fire whiskey clutched in his hand. He sauntered to the benches. "Can I?" He asked, looking down on the empty spot beside Lily on the bench.
"Of c-course." Lily mentally scolded herself for stammering so much around James. Where had the confident and cheerful Lily gone to? She cleared her throat and tried starting a conversation between them. "Thank you, by the way."
"For?"
"For taking the time to talk to me and not refusing, thank you."
"Oh. That's nothing, really."
"So…err…How are you?" Lily tried to ask. The silence and awkward cracking of their voices a while later unnerved her. So she tried to swerve the conversation into a comfortable one. She was clearly attempting to stir the conversation away from the topic she had initially wanted to talk to him about; the delicate topic that she was so scared to open up.
"I'm fine. Errr. I'm currently keeping myself busy with training. I applied for an Auror career. And they're trying to kill me with training. I just got a week break." He joked and gave an awkward laugh, trying to lighten the aura surrounding them. "How about you?"
"I'm okay as well. I'm also looking for a job; a job in mediwizardry, to be exact." Lily involuntarily shivered when a gust of wind blew and brushed her cheeks. The breeze was turning cold and her outfit wasn't really doing anything good. She was currently wearing a white dress with silk, short sleeves that flapped along with the blowing wind.
"Are you cold? Here." Just like the gentleman he really was, James took off his coat and tried to put it around her. His skin touched hers and they both involuntarily jumped slightly away from each other as if a jolt of electricity passed through their bodies. James' cheeks awkwardly turned red and instead of wrapping the coat around Lily's shoulders, he just handed it silently to her
Lily reached for the coat, mumbled a soft "Thanks," and wrapped the coat around her. She inhaled the familiar masculine scent that lingered around James' coat. That was when she realized how much she really missed him. She longed for him to hold her in his arms again, to hug her tight just like before.
Everything felt nostalgic to Lily. It hurt her to remember what she and James were before. The situation was turning even more awkward by the moment and she couldn't handle that so she tried to lighten the mood once more by lengthening the conversation. "So, how's U-Uncle and A-Aunt?" She asked, pertaining to James' parents. "It's been a while since I last saw them. How are they doing?" She had grown closer to James' parents, especially after their graduation when she along with her other best friend Hestia, spent the summer with the Marauders at the Potter mansion. And both have insisted for her to call them Aunt and Uncle. But talking about them just made Lily tense even more. At that moment, she felt how much she had missed them. After all, they had become her second family.
"They're okay. They said they miss you, A LOT! They've been saying that plenty of times." James smiled - his smile, finally reaching his eyes. It seemed like being asked about his family brought back happy memories. For a short moment, Lily saw the happy-go-lucky boy that James once was and it made her smile as well. "But, yeah, I told them that you're also busy and things just aren't the same anymore." As fast as it had come, the smile and gleam in James' eyes vanished. And along with it, the mood around them tensed once more. Lily hid her face that flashed with hurt at the instant remembrance of that fateful night.
Lily didn't know what to do anymore. Everything felt awkward. She wanted to cry and break down. How did everything turn to that? Just over a year ago, they were happy together. They enjoyed each other's company. And if you look back a year ago, you wouldn't see them awkwardly talking while sitting in a bench. Instead, you'll see them comfortably cuddling close to each other as if both of them had no care about the world. All they cared about was being with each other. How had that turned to this? Lily blamed herself. It was all her fault. If it wasn't because of that night, things wouldn't have turned out like this. If she'd just listened to him and hadn't walked away, things would've turned out differently, very differently. That was the same thing that was bothering her, making her stay up all night for the past days.
These days, I haven't been sleeping
Staying up, playing back myself leaving
FLASHBACK…
The bright moonlight sifted faintly through the pale lilac curtains of Lily Evans' window. The pale light landed on her legs as she sat cross-legged on her bed, her head leaning against her headboard. Just as usual, she couldn't sleep. It had been a few nights since she was able to sleep properly. That fact was showing in the form of purple rings under her emerald eyes.
It was very difficult for her to sleep ever since a couple of days ago when she found out something about James. Ever since that day, her heart felt heavy. If it was broken before, it was crushed and to smaller pieces after hearing what Sirius and Hestia had found out. It was like her broken heart was shoved inside a blender and was left there for hours while the contraption was running in its fastest. After that, only one thing was clear for Lily: James had been innocent and she had pushed him away for nothing.
Lily brushed her fingers across her cheeks, where tears flowed freely. She wiped her tears away as she shifted her position on her bed. With a sob, she straightened her legs as she felt all pins and needles piercing them. Of course, she wasn't crying about her numb legs. But how she wished her heart would just go numb like her limbs. She couldn't bear the hurt anymore.
Every single night, Lily Evans stayed up on her bed while she thought about all the things that were happening in her life. This always led to her thinking about her past. And when she thought about her past, it always led to James, because James was what her past was all about.
From her sitting position on the bed, Lily moved to lie down. When her back was completely rested on the soft mattress, her mind began to wander away again just like how it always used to. Just like before, her memory wandered to her past with James; how they met, how he always annoyed her before, how he always played pranks on the other students, on their later years, how he had always asked her out and how she had always said no. But her mind stopped at a memory that was the dearest to her, the memory of how it all started; how she and James started getting into the right foot and becoming friends. It was a fateful event for her. She had gained new friendship in the form of the Marauders and James when she lost another friendship. That very same day that she became friends with James was the very same day that her friendship with Sev crumbled down. She gained James as a friend during the time she mostly needed one…
FLASHBACK within FLASHBACK…
Lily's normal life started to change during the first days of February at Hogwarts. That was when everything started. Everything that she thought wouldn't happen, happened and she loved how it happened.
"Oi, Snivellus, I'm hearing things about what you did today!" James shouted at Severus Snape, who was sitting at the grass and leaning his back against the trunk of a big tree in front of the lake. James approached the Slytherin boy; Sirius and Peter were behind him. Remus was at the common room, refusing to go out.
"Really, Potter? I didn't expect that, seeing as I thought your ears were clogged up by that inflated, airy brain of yours."
"Heh, that's the best you got, Snivelly? If you're trying to taunt me, you should do better than that. I heard you were spreading bad things about Remus." James halted in front of Snape. He looked down on him with loathe and disgust in his eyes.
"Such as?"
"That's he's a good for nothing bloke. That nobody wanted him, even his own parents. That he's a crazy freak who made nothing but trouble. The worst, that he's a werewolf." James bellowed. "Those are all rubbish, Snape!"
"They're really not, Potter. I was only speaking the truth." Snape said, standing up and trying to look brave. But the bad thing was, he was a head shorter than James. So he still looked like a little mice in front of a vicious tiger.
"You're so brave now, aren't you? Be careful, Lily's not here to save your butt. You can't hide behind her now like a baby. And you don't have proof about Remus. You don't know him. Besides, what did Remus ever do to you?"
"In case you've forgotten, Potter. You lot have been messing with me ever since we first laid our feet in this castle. And I don't need Lily to defend me anymore. I can fight for myself now."
"Why? Because you're got the mark? You're his now, aren't you? You're brave now and you think you can just insult anybody now just because you've got that f*cking snake on your arm." James accused, his anger heightening each moment. "I think you're forgetting one thing, Snivellus. Sirius and I were the ones insulting you. Never, even once, did Remus say anything bad to you. Besides being involved in our pranks, which really affects everybody but gets nothing more than occasional laughs and some glares from the victims and never insults, Remus isn't involved in our taunting of you. If you want to get back on Sirius and me, go for it, we're not scared. But not Remus, he didn't say anything bad to you."
At that moment, Lily emerged from the castle's oak doors. She saw a crowd of students gathering near the lake. Being the Headgirl, she went to check it out. That was when she saw Potter and his gang bullying Severus once again. At that moment, anger and annoyance boiled inside her. They really don't mature, do they? Especially Potter. He's the Headboy! He's supposed to be a good example. Lily thought to herself. She sprinted to the area and pushed through the crowd. That was the moment she heard their voices.
"You don't have the right to insult a Marauder especially if it's Remus. He's even better than you. If there's someone here who's a good for nothing bloke, it's you, not Remus." James drawled, his voice was trembling with anger. Nobody insults a Marauder if nothing bad was done. That was James' thought.
Lily cut in. "If there was a good for nothing bloke here, it's you, Potter." Lily accused. "What are you even doing? You're supposed to a good example, being the Headboy. But instead, you're being a git as usual. You're bullying Severus again. Leave him alone." She warned James and his little immature gang. Then she proceeded to shooing away the group of students staring at them.
James' eyes flashed with hurt. Lily's words hit him in the gut. He was just defending his best friend, but still, he was the bad one. He sighed, but nevertheless, shoved his emotions away for dealing later. He turned to Snape once more. He was disgusted by him. He was the boy. Yet, he was hiding behind Lily like the coward he really was. "Disgusting coward." James murmured to himself.
Snape saw James' disgusted look that was directed at him just because of Lily's act of defending him. Surely, he thought that this would cause everybody to think that he needed Lily to defend himself like a baby. "I don't need you to defend me, Lily. Go away." Snape angrily said, but his eyes were turned to James.
James' thick eyebrows crunched in irritation. Why the heck is he pushing her away? His look on Snape intensified with anger and irritation. He didn't know why but he was irritated of Snape hiding behind Lily. But, he was more irritated when Snape pushes her away. He was being favored by Lily, yet, he turns her away. Stupid, stupid git!
Lily became confused. She turned her attention, from shooing the crowd, to Snape. "What? Sev, I was just helping you."
"I'm not weak! I don't need your help. Go away!" Snape said without taking his eyes away from James, clearly in a glaring fest.
"But-"
"I said go away! I don't need a mudbloood to defend me!" Snape had a slip of the tongue. There were loud gasps from the students who were still there, even from the Marauders themselves. As soon as he said it, he regretted it. He turned to Lily immediately, his eyes turning gentle as he saw the look of hurt in her eyes and suddenly, he was back on earth. What was he thinking? He had redirected his anger to Lily. That resulted to him calling her a 'mudbloood,' which he didn't really mean.
"What did you say?" It was James who spoke first, his voice shaking more than ever. Lily was just held speechless, that fact made James angrier as he shot a death glare towards Snape. If looks could kill, Snape would be buried underground at that instant. "Don't you dare insult Lily! How could you? She's your friend, you dolt!" James started advancing towards Snape. He looked at him intently then growled. "Never insult Lily in front of me." His voice was so low, only Snape heard it. But nonetheless, James voice etched fear in Snape's mind.
Meanwhile, Lily was taken aback at what Severus had said. He had insulted her. She was left with her mouth slightly open in shock. When she finally recovered from the shock, tears started to well up in her eyes. She looked at him in the eye and she bit her lip. Her best friend had just insulted her. She turned away and ran before she broke down in front of everybody.
As soon as Lily ran past him, James' anger exploded. His eyes went blurred with fury and he instantly grabbed Snape and shoved him against the tree. "If she cries, you'll pay!" How could he say that to her, in the first place? Even I, myself haven't said that to anybody and I am a pureblood. While Snape, the slimy git? He was only a half-blood and he had the guts to call anybody that; even Lily, his best friend. What kind of freaking mind does this git have? He lifted his fist and directed it at Snape. But before his knuckles even made contact with Snape's face, James stopped. He badly wanted to punch the life out of that oily face, but he stopped himself, his fist, hovering in the air, a few inches away from Snapes' crooked nose. Instead, he ran towards the castle (making sure to show a demo of his flowery language and threats at Snape before he left completely) to the Heads' dorm where Lily will surely be. Lily was more important than the idiot in front of him. But he made a mental note to continue what he was about to do some other time.
Back at the grounds, Snape was far too shocked to hear the second round of threats that Potter said before he left. The image of Lily's teary eyes lingered in his mind. He slid to the ground and his back ached due to Potter's forceful shove. But the pain was nothing compared to his anger and regret for what he said. He wanted to go look for Lily and apologize. But even then, he knew it was too late.
As he was expecting, James found Lily in their Heads' common room. She was sitting on the floor in front of the fire. Her back was leaning against the sofa and was turned to him. "E-Eva-Lily?"
"Go away."
"Lily, are you okay?"
"I said go away!"
James flinched at the loudness of her shout. Being hated by Lily, he was already numb when it came to her yelling. But at that moment, her yell wasn't like her normal shout. It was filled with hurt. Instead of turning around and leaving her, James bravely walked towards her and sat down beside her. He saw her staring blankly at the fire cackling in the fireplace. Her face was blank and emotionless. But her eyes looked vulnerable.
"I thought I told you to go away."
"Look, I just want to make sure you're okay."
"What if I'm not? What are you gonna do?" Lily turned to him, her face blank and impassive.
What was he gonna do again? He was planning to comfort her. Hug her, if she needed it and if she was crying. But it looked like that wasn't a good choice right now, not with that blank face of her. He didn't even know what that blank face meant. "I-I'll comfort you?"
Lily gave a humorless laugh. "What makes you think you can make me feel better?"
"I don't know. I just want to comfort you." James sighed. "Look, I'm sorry. I know this is kinda my fault."
Lily looked intently at his eyes for a moment and then turned them back to the fire.
To James, Lily looked so fragile. She looked so helpless even though her expression was blank. She didn't even move away when his knees touched hers. Feeling Lily's trembling knee against his own, James wanted to punch the living daylights out of Snape at that moment. It pained him to see Lily like that. The normal Lily wasn't weak. She was strong and she was the type of girl who never cries easily. He was used to seeing Lily's alive and blazing expression. Heck, he'd even choose Lily's angry and full-of-hate eyes over this vulnerable look in them. He wanted to blame everything at Snape. But seeing her like that made him realize this was also his fault. If he'd just confronted Snape in a different place and a different time, Lily wouldn't have been there and she wouldn't have heard what that slimy git said. "I know this is my fault. I'm not denying that. But I was just defending Moony from Snape."
"Defending? Why? As of what I remember, you lot were the bullies not him." Lily pertained to Snape with uncertainty in her voice. She didn't know him anymore. She thought she knew her friend. She thought he was a good man. She thought he was just a poor victim. She thought…there were so many things that she thought. But the event of that day made her doubt everything. She thought she knew him but it turned out, she really didn't.
"I'm not just saying this to clean my name and to make me look good in your eyes. But I was just doing what I thought was right. I defended Moony because he's my friend, just like what you did for him." James pertained to Snape with loathe in his voice. "He spread bad things about Moony. Snape told everyone that Moony was just a good for nothing bloke and that even Moony's parents didn't love him. He also spread that Remus was a w-werewolf. And you know Moony. You know that he's none of those things." James hesitated. After all, it was true: Moony was a werewolf. But still, it wasn't right to spread that to everyone. It wasn't their secret to tell. Nobody had the right to tell anybody. "You know him. If there was a responsible and innocent person among us four, Remmy is the most deserving of that title."
"Severus did that?" Lily asked James.
"Yes."
"How certain are you?"
"I've confronted Criss and he said it was Snape who told him about it. Then the news spread around the whole castle. I also asked Richter, Holden, Walker and Lytle and they all said the same thing. They said it a came from Snape. Now, Moony's feeling bad about it. Everybody kept asking him if it was true. He wouldn't even come out of the common room."
James' statement just added fuel to the fire of doubt in Lily's heart. James was right. She knew Remus. He was a prefect and she was close to him as well. He was the only Marauder she had ever trusted and believed. Yes, she had her hunches that Remus was, indeed, a werewolf because of the obvious signs. But Remus was a good man; he certainly didn't deserve that kind of predicament even though he was a real werewolf. He didn't deserve that. What had Severus done? Was he really the same friend she trusted before? She didn't know anymore.
"Lily, I'm really, really sorry. If I hadn't done that, he wouldn't have said that to you." James apologized. Don't get him wrong, he didn't regret confronting Snape about the issue. He only regretted that he didn't confront him secretly about it, which had left to the scenario of Lily overhearing them and being called the M word, which is not Muggle by the way. But still, he was a complete bastard to say it. He knew there was a really acceptable reason why he hated that git from the root to the tip of his greasy hair ever since he set eyes on him.
"No. Now that I've heard the story, I know it's not your fault. It's just right that you defended Remus. I should be the one apologizing. I insulted you earlier. I thought you were bullying him again. But I guess, I'm wrong to think that he's always the one being bullied. I have to accept that sometimes, he is the bully."
"Hell, yeah." James said before he could help himself. Then, as if remembering that he should be a little serious, he mumbled an embarrassed apology. "Oh, sorry."
Lily just shrugged it off. "I guess, I don't know him anymore. I always thought he was good or that I can change him and make him good. I'm really confused right now. I feel betrayed; betrayed that my own best friend can call me that. We've known each other even before Hogwarts, you know? He was the one who introduced me to the world of magic. And yet, he can call me that. I feel so betrayed." By that time Lily finished, she was already trembling. She wasn't really crying, but she was trembling.
James could tell that Lily was resisting the urge to cry because she didn't want him to see her cry, to see her in such a weak state. But James didn't care anymore. He hated to see her in a weak condition. It hurt him to see her in a vulnerable form. And the urge to hug and console her was strengthening until it overwhelmed him. He succumbed to the desire to comfort her, to hold her tight and to make her feel that she wasn't alone, that he was with her, that he wasn't just a git who just wanted to play with her feelings and just follows her around as a pastime. He wanted her to feel that he was there for her, that he loved her. That was when he pulled her against him and hugged her tightly. "Sssssh, Lily. You're shaking. Relax, I'm here." He whispered in her ear. He knew, in the back of his mind, that there was a chance that she could push him away and holding her like that could cause her to think that he was taking advantage of the situation. It might drive her away. But he didn't give a damn anymore. He didn't care whether she will push him or not. Comforting her was the only thing that mattered to him at that moment.
Lily was startled when James suddenly hugged her. She was surprised at first. But then, she felt his tight hold on her and it mysteriously relaxed her. She didn't know how and why but at that moment when he was holding her, she felt that she wasn't alone, that nothing could harm her anymore while she was with him. She waited for the urge to pull away to overcome her. She expected herself to have the courage to push him away and break their contact. But it didn't come. Instead, she found herself enjoying the hug. She sighed with resignation and wrapped her arms around him. She buried her head in his chest and let the heavy breathing and loud throbbing of his heart calm her.
James also felt his body relax. At the moment that Lily wrapped her arms around him, he felt all his fears and uncertainties melt away. He felt that there was no chance that Lily would think that he was taking advantage of the situation. More over, there was no chance that Lily will push him violently away and tell him to shove off her. He felt himself enjoying the bliss of the moment. He had the maddest idea that his heart was dancing the conga. After a few long minutes, he finally felt Lily's shaking subside. That was when he decided to pull away. After all, they couldn't stay that way forever; although, he wouldn't mind if they could. "Are you okay now? How are you feeling?"
Lily gave a slight smile. Although it was just a slight smile, it still reached her beautiful emerald eyes. "Hmmmm. As contrary to how I've known you, you're not such a bad teddy bear at all." Lily joked.
"Teddy bear? Me? A teddy bear? What a handsome stuff toy I am."
"That part, I didn't say." Lily said as she fixed her sitting position. She straightened up. "But really, thank you, James. I didn't think I'd ever say this to you but…You're quite nice." She teased. She was thoroughly grateful to him. She didn't know why but she felt that even though she used to hate him, she felt that they have known each other for so long. She found it ridiculous that she was beginning to see a different him that fast and just because of the hug. But she didn't think it impossible.
With the excitement he felt for hearing Lily call his first name for the first time, James mock bowed, his hands flinging to the side and swirling around as he bent. "Thank you, thank you. Hold your applause, please." That made Lily laugh. "So, now that you already think I'm nice…and handsome-"
"Hey, I didn't say that!"
"Yes, you did." Argued James. He wriggled his eyebrows and smiled crookedly at Lily, a clear sign that he desperately trying to swoon her. "Will you go out with me?"
Lily cocked a deep red eyebrow.
Realizing what he just said, James immediately took it back. "Oh. I was just-err-kidding. I was joking." Now that Lily had admitted to seeing him in a new light, he was ecstatic. But really, he realized he shouldn't push it too much…just a little, maybe. "So… Do you want to go…?"
Lily's eyebrow didn't lower down. "Where?"
"To the Gryffindor common room. We can't sulk in here, especially you. You need some cheering up. And I think Padfoot and I just have the best recipe." He winked at her. "Also, I want to check out Moony. Come with me?"
Lily saw nothing bad with coming with him to the common room. Again, she was finding it extremely weird how her perception of James changed that fast but she realized there was nothing really wrong with truly knowing him and not just shoving him away every time. After all, he had proven himself to be a good friend to Remus, Sirius, Peter and, probably, to her. "Okay, then. I see nothing wrong with it."
"Yes!" James cheered softly and punched the air in glee as Lily turned around to take her things off of the floor and put them on the couch. He immediately brushed his hair innocently and pretended to look at the ceiling when Lily suspiciously turned around at the sound of his cheer.
Together, they went to the Gryffindor common room. James tried his best to cheer her up by telling her jokes and the other hilarious adventures of the Marauders. Suddenly, the agitating event of that afternoon seemed to fly away from their minds. In no time, they reached the portrait of the fat lady. They said the password and the fat lady gladly let them in. But still, the lady's eyebrows were raised in confusion when she saw them laughing and not arguing.
Sirius, meanwhile, was lying down on the couch in front of the common room fireplace lazily. He was a bit bored and at the same time, irritated. Prongs was nowhere to be seen, Peter was…being Peter, Moony was not talking and everybody seemed to be avoiding Moony-which irritated Sirius to the next century. What the body hell do they think they're doing? Looking at Moony like that. If they continue that, I'll tear their limbs apart with my canine teeth. This is all that slimy git's fault! Sirius thought with a growl. That was when the portrait hole opened and James and Lily entered, both were…laughing? LAUGHING? All other thoughts flew away from Sirius' mind at the sight of Prongs and Lilykins laughing together. "Holy cricket." His mouth dropped to the floor at the same time as the people from the room gasped.
"Okay, knock, knock!" James said as they went through the portrait hole.
"Who's there?"
"You-know."
"You-know-who?" Lily fell into the trap of the joke and so James cackled with laughter, apparently impressed with his own joke. Lily rolled her eyes at the corny joke, but, nevertheless, laughed. Not with the joke though, but with the way James laughed so merrily. She thought there was something viral and contagious about his laugh that just makes you laugh too when you hear it. Not to mention the way his eyes twinkled every time he cackled. She wondered to herself why she was noticing these things just now.
Sirius sat bolt upright on the couch. Peter was sitting on a wooden chair behind the couch, his chin, leaning against the back of the couch while his arms were draped on it while he slept. Remus, on the other hand, was sitting on the floor in front of the grate, clearly avoiding the eyes of the Gryffindors on the room.
Without taking his eyes off the approaching Headboy and girl, Sirius reached his hand behind his head in an effort to touch Peter's shoulder. "Oi, Wormy! Wormy! Oi, Wormtail!" Sirius was desperately groping for flesh behind the couch. Once he touched skin, he started to pinch it in an attempt to get Peter's attention. Then, his head crunch in disgust as he felt his hand come in contact with a slimy substance. He immediately retreated his hand and smelled it. It smelled foul. He looked behind him and saw that Peter was sleeping and drool was flowing freely at the side of his mouth. He immediately took out his wand and siphoned the offending substance. Then he, once again, looked at Lily and James who were still laughing as if they didn't mind, see, and hear the gasps and wide eyes of every Gryffindor in the room, except for Peter.
"Moony, are you seeing what I'm seeing?" Sirius asked but no answer came. He looked at Moony and saw that his eyes were wide too with surprise. "It's the end of the world!" Sirius bellowed. He stood up from the couch, walked towards James and halted in front of him. "What is happening, Prongs?"
James flashed a confused look on Sirius. "What do you mean?"
Sirius' face contorted in exaggerated sadness and then he asked, "Are you dying, Prongs? Is this your dying wish? To be able to spend a couple of hours laughing with Lily?" Then, he turned to Lily. "And you decided to fulfill it before he goes six feet under?" Then, he turned to James once more, his eyes, overly filling with exaggerated tears. "Prongs, are you sick to death? Why didn't you tell us?" Sirius dropped to his knees. He look up at James. "We could've made you happier! Why didn't you tell us you were spending your last days? Why, Prongs? Wha-ha-haaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyy-"
SMACK! James' palm smacked against the back of Sirius' head. "Shut up, Padfoot! I'm not dying!"
"Oh, you're not?" Sirius' face went back to being confused. "Then why?" He cocked an eyebrow at the two as he stood up once again.
James looked at Lily with a smirk. "She thinks I'm handsome."
Lily rolled her eyes once more. "I didn't say that. I'll only say that when Black admits to being ugly."
"Oh, no, no, no! I'm not ugly. Never! In fact, I'm the most handsomest, most cutest, most sexiest and most adorablest human alive."
"That proves it. I'm never gonna think you're handsome." Lily teased and laughed at James' non-amused face. She went to the couch and seated herself.
"That's unfair! Oh, come on! Don't rely my looks on Padfoot." James whined. He went to the couch as well and sat comfortably on Lily's right. Sirius sat on his right as well after pushing Peter's arms off of the couch. He turned to Sirius. "Besides, what kind of word is adorablest?"
"It's the word used to describe me." Sirius simply answered as if it was the most recent discovery of the greatest of philosophers.
"Yeah. Right. So you're non-existent, then? Got it, Pads!"
Lily ignored the two bickering best friends and surveyed Remus. "Remus, you okay?"
Remus, who had recovered from the shock of seeing James and Lily laughing together, answered Lily with a shrug.
"I heard about it. I'm sorry."
"Why? It's not your fault." Remus asked weakly.
"Because Snape did it. I'm apologizing because I know he wouldn't ever apologize to you. Besides, you're not… " Lily hesitated. "good for nothing." She was supposed to say 'werewolf' but she thought that Remus, indeed, might be a werewolf. So she settled for 'good for nothing'. Lily looked around the common room. Apparently, they were being surveyed in a weird way by most of the Gryffindors. It wasn't natural for Gryffindors to act like this towards their co-Gryffindors. This irritated Lily. "I hate the way the look at you." Lily made a move to stand up. She was going to tell them all to stop treating Remus like that.
Remus, having a hunch that Lily would address the whole common room, tried to stop her by tugging at her robes. "Lily, what are you-! It's alright; I'm okay, get down!"
Lily ignored Remus' tugging. It was obvious that he needed help. He was just too shy to fight for his own good. Lily felt like she had to do something. After all, both she and Remus had been prefects ever since their 5th year and she knew that he was a good man. "What are you all looking at?"
Silence.
"If you all are thinking that the rumors gong around are true, you're all stupid."
"Lily, you're Headgirl. You might get in trouble." Remus continued tugging frantically at Lily's robes' hem.
"Moony, relax. She can handle herself. Right, Lily-flower? Go get 'em, girl!" Sirius cheered.
"Chill, Remmy. She won't get in trouble. Besides, they'll all listen to her. Just watch." James second.
"It's not true. You guys are all Gryffindors. You know better than to believe what a Slytherin spreads around. You know Remus and you know Snape. You decide for yourselves who you will believe. But hear this, you were put in Gryffindor, act like one. Spreading nasty rumors and judging people is Slytherin work." Lily finished. She spared one more look around the room, catching the eyes of the people she and Remus knew, and sat back down.
A moment after, the other Gryffindors went up to their dormitories one by one, clearly shamed by what Lily had said.
A few moments later, the common room portrait passageway flew open. Hestia and Alice stumbled inside the common room and instantly looked around, their eyes searching for their best friend.
"Lily, there you are! We've been looking all over for you!" Alice said as she caught her breath.
"We heard what happened. We went to the Heads' dormitories but it was already empty." Hestia stormed across the room towards where Lily was sitting. She squeezed between Lily and James, ignoring the protest from Sirius who practically fell down from the couch due to lack of space. "Are you okay?"
Before Lily could even answer, Alice snapped. She walked towards Lily and kneeled in front of her, her face contorted in anger. "I hate that Snape! He's gonna pay for what he did. I swear in the name of Merlin-"
"Alice, it's okay." Lily cut off but she was ignored by Alice, who continued killing Snape verbally.
"I will kill that boy the first time I see him, Li-"
"ALICE!"
Alice stopped abruptly. "Huh?"
"You're blabbing. Stop it. I said it's okay."
Hestia was the one who answered. "How can it be okay? She called you the M word."
Lily sighed. "I still feel horrible about it." Lily paused. "But I can't feel bad about it forever. I won't confront him or whatever else. I'm just gonna leave him alone. If he could say that, I don't think he sees me as a friend anymore."
Hestia's eyes widened. "That's just it? You're gonna let him get away with it?"
"What's the point? Besides, it's not like I can beat the hell out of him." Lily reasoned.
"Well, I can." James offered. He turned his face to Sirius and raised his eyebrows expectantly at his best friend. Sirius nodded vigorously from his place on the floor. "We can do that for you."
"It'll be an honor, Lily-flower." Sirius supplied with a cheeky grin.
Lily scowled at James and Sirius. "No. You're not gonna do that."
"But-" James argued but was cut off by Lily's finger, which was suddenly in front of his face.
"You're Headboy. You can't get in trouble." Lily ordered.
"I'm not Headboy." Sirius said, the glint in his eyes still not vanishing. "I can get in trouble."
"I said no, Sirius." Lily insisted. "Just leave him be. I'll leave him alone just like what he wants. I didn't think this day would come, but I think I've lost my best friend forever. All that's left to do is move on."
Alice sighed in defeat. "If you say so. But remember, if he hurts again, we won't let him get away with it."
Hestia nodded enthusiastically beside Lily.
Lily smiled at her best friends and nodded. Alice stood up and wrapped her arms around Lily and Hestia in a group hug.
James peeled his eyes away from the sentimental girls. As his eyes landed on his best friend, he noticed Sirius' eyes tearing up. "Pads, don't tell me you're feeling bad for that git Snape."
Sirius' head snapped to James. "What? No! Never!"
"Then, why are you crying?"
"Lily just called me by my first name, Prongsie." Sirius answered, while his eyes gleamed with happy tears.
Hestia, Alice and Lily broke apart and stared at Sirius. It was Lily who asked. "Is he always this overreacting?"
James snorted, his eyes still on Sirius who was now bawling out in his hands.
"He's just warming up." Remus answered, a smile finally gracing his lips.
"Hey!" Sirius protested. He reached for James' trousers and blew his nose noisily in it.
James' face twisted in disgust as he yanked the hem of his pants away from Sirius. "Yuck! Padfoot!" James growled as he stood up from his seat and reached his arms out to clutch at Sirius.
Sirius rolled out from James' grasp and ran away from him, his laugh bouncing off the stone walls of the common room. "You'll never catch me, Prongs dear!"
The girls and Remus joined Sirius' laughter as they watched Sirius and James running around the room like idiots. Peter was still asleep and unknowing of the events that happened; it was to be expected from him.
AN: That's the first chapter. I hope it didn't confuse you much. I also hope that it didn't bore you and that you liked it. Please send me a review and tell me what you think. Even a single-word review is accepted. But please no flames. Thanks! READ AND REVIEW!